Costa Rica - A Grandmother’s Interpretation
Six months ago our daughter and son-in-law announced that he was going to spend a week in Costa Rica as part of his MBA program at NYU.
“It’s like spending a semester abroad”, our daughter quickly explained seeing our shocked expressions.
To my ear that first week in January would consist largely of his going to class a couple of hours a day, acquiring credit towards a degree, and mostly playing around in a foreign country. Well, I thought, that’s fine and good for a twenty-year-old full-time graduate student, but he’s a thirty-two-year-old father of two. It’s a dumb idea.
A thousand thoughts began rushing through my mind. How would she manage? Would the three of them move in with us for a week? How would that work? The kids would not have their normal surroundings or schedule. On the other hand I didn’t want to go live with her for a week. Her building doesn’t allow dogs, and I’d be out of my surroundings and schedule. My resentment began to build.
Then they explained that while he’d be getting this semester’s worth of credit for one week, she’d stay home, have her nanny come, and pretty much have a normal week. It would go quickly. I decided to believe them.
Well, she and the twins ended up spending four of the eight nights he was away, at our house. Everyone got up at six and were in bed by nine. She also nearly had a breakdown. The wear and tear on all of us was enormous. The kids kept calling for “da-da,” and, silently, we all were too.
On the plus side each of the rest of us got to spend quality time alone with the twins without one or the other parent hanging over our heads, my daughter got the intermittent relief of family, and he got a semester’s worth of credit - while hang gliding and power sailing through Costa Rica. Not a bad week’s work.
So, this is family. We support one another so the whole may thrive. I just hope the intensity diminishes as my age advances.