sometimes i forget that george is 23 years old and get surprised when i see that he’s growing a lil sum sum on his chin

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sometimes i forget that george is 23 years old and get surprised when i see that he’s growing a lil sum sum on his chin
So in my tiny group of friends, I have always kind of been the mother duck. I try to keep everyone out of trouble and make everyone happy even at my own expense. A good example of this would be this previous week on vacation. I took a Really close friend of mine along, and since I know how she is, I tried my best to guide her along. I held on to her money for her since she had a rather large sum of cash, and since she is sometimes rather oblivious, I tended to hold her hand and lead her around in public to keep her from getting lost or separated from us. According to my father, protecting the people I care most about is inappropriate behavior and doing so thus makes me a lesbian. Now, I may tend to lean a bit towards the straighter side of being bi, but I really do NOT appreciate my father calling me a lesbian. And on top of it, he doesn't seem to get that I was trying to save HIS ASS because I am pretty sure he would have been neck deep in shit of he lost someone else's kid in another state, or managed to get someone else's kids hard earned cash stolen in another state. It really bugs me how parents can be so judging and misunderstanding. For Pete's sake, let me do as I need to and make my own fucking mistakes.
Why can't people think that things that are meant to be taken as a joke... Are a joke? Seriously. Like, if I'm joking, clearly, sarcastically joking... Why can't people understand that it's a fucking joke.