“Anonymous” sent:
there is mayo. everywhere.
it's caked the walls and the window and the floor and the furniture and every single nook and cranny of every expensive thing in this room - the hand-weaved carpet, the cedar chairs, the antique decorations, everything. it's like someone decided to dump an entire three gallons of pure, unflavored mayo into this office because they wanted to make a swimming pool out of it.
on the desk, almost unseen against the white of all this gunk, is a pale card made from a very nice, very high quality paper.
"Happy birthday! I ordered for you the fanciest of fancy presents I could think of straight from Fontaine, so enjoy! Hah!
With some love—"
an unfortunate splatter of mayo covers the sender's name. but perhaps it's obvious regardless (or perhaps it's not at all; this is your office, isn't it? who else can enter this space but the eleventh of the fatui harbingers? and anyway, who has the money and the energy for this - much less the motive?)
Birthday Asks
A certain smell reaches Childe’s nose that makes him halt in his tracks as he reaches for the doorknob to his office. The feeling in his gut niggles at him, and he almost considers calling for one of his subordinates to check it out, but he is Tartaglia, Number Eleven of the Eleven Fatui Harbingers, and he does not back down from a challenge! So sucking in a breath, he turns the handle and pushes the door open.
And wishes he had taken the day off.
Weariness settles into battle hardened bones as blue eyes rake across the scene. With every splash of mayo spotted, the Harbinger counts up the cost to have everything either cleaned or replaced.
He gives up counting at 500,000 Mora and simply-- steps back out to close the door, resting his head against the wood.
There’s only one person in existence who would pull such a prank, and he curses the Abyss’ interdimensional abilities as a certain face enters his mind. It seems he’ll have to get her back for the prank on her own birthday. In the mean time... ...he’ll need to organise for someone to clean up the mess as much as possible while he goes out and finds replacements for the irreparable items.