#TheNinjaImmovableHeart is a pretentious, conflated, bloated, overbearing, meandering, self-stroking, contrived, sloppy, selfish, dry, tactless, insufferable, vain, bland, disjuncted, whitewashed, derivative, tonedeaf, creatively malnurtured, fake ass trash panda of an action film that can barely identify itself. The best part about this, really movie is that if you've never heard of it until now, then you're already well off. That said, the only way to watch this garbage... is to buy a copy of #Ninja2 starring #ScottAdkins, or #NinjaAssassin starring #Rain. Anything is better than this D-list bottom of the barrel crap of last-minute ideas stretched out to the nearly two-hours you can easily better spend watching something else. Otherwise, if you decide to try your luck, make sure you have enough beer to share with six of your mates or more. Because that's the only way your gonna enjoy this cold bowl of watered-down mayonaise soup with a side of unseasoned chicken from a spam can at your local bodega that is this bullshit gaijin ass ninja movie. FFS.
