#nirath tovaul

[nirath-tovaul]

There's only so much you can do and say under the pressures of captivity, a feeling of restraint so suffocating there's no breaking free. A breath here and there, flooding your lungs with the intoxicating sense of being alive, fanning a flame that will only grow the more the oxygen within you dissipates.

Those first moments of blind rage, a sense of release unlike like anything I had felt before, falling from such a high in a spiral. A buzzing from every angle, panicked shouts and sprinting steps, an excruciating pain as I was forced into my prison once more.

Again, the sense of freedom is no longer mine. Even so, a flame was ignited and will continue to burn until satisfied.

[nirath-tovaul]

Fear is difficult to explain. The fear of heights, tight spaces, the fear of being alone, abandonment. It’s all fear, yet it collects in different ways, presenting in rational and irrational manners. 

Acrophobia, claustrophobia, autophobia.

Perhaps that’s noticed after years of pain, being tossed aside carelessly once all purpose has been drained from the soul. 

You begin to notice the ticks, the anxiety that manifests, your own aggression. Why would I allow someone to get close, when all they will do is leave? 

[nirath-tovaul]

Humanity is far too unworthy of my presence. A gift should only be given when earned. 

What has humanity done to deserve me?

[nirath-tovaul]

Earth shall shatter beneath my feet, a species will be demolished by my hands alone.

Vengeance is such a charming thing, don’t you think~?

[nirath-tovaul]

I will never break. 

I will never bow.

I will never submit.

I will hold my head high, I will destroy this world.

[nirath-tovaul]

Here comes revenge, just for you. Revenge, you can't undo. Revenge, it's killing me. Revenge, set me free. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. A life for a life, it's my burden of proof. Revenge, just for you. Revenge. You ask forgiveness, I give you sweet revenge. I return this nightmare, I will find you Sleepless, cloaked in despair, I'm behind you.  

[nirath-tovaul]

I am a King, Or an Emperor rather, I wear crown-imperial And prince's-feather; Golden-rod is the sceptre I wield and wag, And a broad purple flag-flower Waves for my flag. Elder the pithy With old-man and sage, These are my councilors Green in old age; Lord-and-ladies in silence Stand round me and wait, While gay ragged-robin Makes bows at my gate.

______________________

Christina Georgina Rossetti

[nirath-tovaul]

Caged, treated like an animal. That seems to be all humanity knows how to do. Trap those that they don’t understand, force dominance, become aggressive when their attempts fail rather miserably.

A creature that does not want to be controlled, will not be controlled. The only true question that lingers is when will humanity understand?