The overly hyped weather system that local newscasters and moms have been loyally fear mongering for the past 4 days needs to chill. I bet it's going to rain hard for 3 days and I'll regret that moccasins and sandals are my only items of footwear but I don't believe that it's going to be terrifying.
Also, maybe I'm channeling my inner tween too hard but I'm sick of people telling me what to do. You know what I'm not gonna do?
Fill my bathtub up with water. No. This is not happening. This sounds like a huge waste of water and a safety hazard for my cat. Also my bathtub didn't come with a tub stopper. Who am I the queen?
Consider boiling water before drinking it if shit gets crazy. Trust me, if it gets to the point where I need to consider boiling water before drinking it I will drive to my mom's house and drink her boiled water or die trying.
Stock up on water. I actually bought a six pack of water at Rite Aid today and I felt disgusting about it. Like, I am officially buying into the hype. I would love to return it, and it wouldn't really be that inconvenient to do so because it is only LIGHTLY RAINING.
You know what I am gonna do though?
Buy mad non perishables. Jokes on you Sandy, the only food I buy is non-perishables. If I had to live off of cheez-its for a week I would call it the week that was like every other week of my adult life.
Park everywhere I want for as long as I want. Free parking for the rest of our lives until Thursday, y'all!
Hunker down. This actually perfectly describes what I do anyway on Sundays so like, no sweat off my back.
In conclusion, Frankenstorm can suck a D. Although there is a very good chance that by Tuesday I will look like this:
