So I write software for a living, for now. I went to school for it.
Years ago, I remember so acutely feeling like my first year on the job taught me more than my years in my degree program; and that where I was, all that I learned in school didn't help to get the job done. The work was...hotwiring databases to move quickly, hacking interop libraries to make ancient softwares do their job better. I'll never forget the time that we had -- I don't think it'll hurt anyone at this point if I share this -- we had a sudden need to get into a system that credentials were lost. It was only by being familiar with configuration files that I found that the super-user credentials were stored *in plain text* in a configuration file. It tried it, and it worked! The closest to hacking I've ever done.
Later on, in a new employment, principles like unit testing approached at the fringes of conversation, spoken of in hushed whispers by my boss over a beer. I thought that talent was something developers either had or didn't. And I learned that there were two jobs, at my job. There was doing the thing the bosses wanted done, and then *knowing how* to do the thing they wanted. There were multiple developers there, and one was fast, focused, effective; but figuring out just what his code did was tough to do, he didn't write his code in a way that explained itself, and no comments to explain it either. There was another developer who was so cautious, who thought their code had to be perfect -- and those efforts nearly always sabotaged their best intent. A third developer was more matured than all of us, and was 100% assigned to the more difficult tasks, and no one understood what their code did.
Now...it's strange. Software libraries by writing little pieces of code, and telling them how to interact with each other in just the right way. It's building a house of cards to interact with the wind in just the right way.
There's conversation about UML diagrams (a graphical way to show those interactions), software design patterns (kind of like football plays -- in a way, I think, but I don't sportsball much, so that could be a bit of a stretch -- it's drawn out ways of placing your code in just the right way to get the most done with the least code that makes the most sense to the next person reading it), algorithmic runtime performance (notice this took 62 milliseconds over 3 milliseconds? Why is that?)....and it's....
...it's strange, I don't have a name for this feeling. It's like inverse homesickness -- instead of longing to return back to a long lost home; finding instead that I journeyed farther and farther away, and that left-behind place moved of its own accord, successfully, snuck up on me, and tapped me on the shoulder.
I forgot what the hills and valleys looked like, the smell of the craftsmanship they tried to teach me in college, but here I am, trying to find my way again in the concepts I'm re-remembering as I'm being reminded of them.
This year, more than just work, has been something like that, for myself, too.
I remember when I lived in Pocahontas county, and I noticed that I would come up with any reason to think about anything *but* me. The mountains, large, distant, alluding to more just around the corner...echoed what I was learning inside myself.
I envy people who have answers. I never seem to, I think my virtues lie more in practicing a growing kindness to making a home among...questions.
Anyway.
