@vis0ractivated
Today was a "worse than normal" pain day. He could also feel his body slipping away, in and out of its natural form. But that wasn't the worst of it. Only parts of him would dematerialize at times, leaving the rest of him to deal with the sudden lack of functional parts.
His joints especially had found this distressing. Sometimes muscles would grow suddenly unstable, weak, all the buckling points crumpling in ways both natural and not. Over time, it began to wear more and more on his body. He'd somewhere in the course of all these things found some days where it felt his joints didn't move as smoothly as they should, like some form of arthritis, but truly something worse.
He could stand. It only sort of hurt when he put pressure on the weaker of his ankles-- the right. All things considered, this wasn't the worst of days. But there was rain. And everything sucked more when it rained. It hadn't even rained yet. The clouds were forming overhead, the air pressure pressing in on him so even his breathing was labored.
Days like these he just wanted to curl up under the blankets, and if he could he so bold, wanted to just be held. Just being warm was enough. He'd throw tight ankle high socks on and pretend it was a proper brace when he laced his boots up. He's put on a brave face and resist every twinge of pain that would run up his legs, all the way up his spine and back down. He'd probably stayed in bed too long already to go unnoticed. But fuck if he didn't just feel like a pile of old crumbly bones.
He just wished this whole rebuilding and stabilizing of his body would hurry the hell up. He wouldn't tell either John nor Jesse if he could help it. Worrying them was pointless. There wasn't much to be done. But Moira? She'd have to deal with him bitching and moaning all through the next check up.