#notbros

[princesswiththebluehair-blog]

Everybody wants to Steal my Girl

Evie walked down the halls of Auradon Prep, heading towards her room that she shared with her best friend, Mal. She took out her pocket sized mirror and freshened up her look, adding just a touch of her infamous red lipstick before entering to find Mal with another blue haired woman. Her eyes rolled as she entered the room fully now, setting her purse on her bed before coming over and giving a small embrace to her purple haired comrade, barely glancing at the other woman. She had been over more and more lately and Evie wasn't a fan in the slightest. There was just something about the other girl from the Isle that made her skin crawl. "Uma" she acknowledged, swallowing the lump in her throat before settling in on her own bed, grabbing her sketch book, trying to start a new design for Mal's newest dress as a dance was swiftly approaching Auradon.

[infamousaly]

Bro's and Dashboard NOPE

I have come to slowly accept the fact that there are some good insects out there that I can now tolerate because of the simple fact that..

They are total Bro's. 

But each Bro has an evil twin. And I have recently identified a couple of these evil twins. 

If everyone has been on the internet, they are familiar with this image. 

The Bee bro, and his NOPE NOT A BRO evil twin.  Bee's used to scare me. Not anymore! Oh what's that Bro? You wanna buzz by my ear, here, look at my screen, chill on that flower, it's cool brah. Whatevs. 

Another example? 

Spider bro! He's just chilling in your window keeping the roaches 'n shit out. He's got your back and does the dirty work for you. Now you and your girlfriend are safe from burglers and you won't get STD's from some slut you decided to bring home from a drunken bar. Everyone wins!

So I was driving down the road, going about 55-60 miles per hour. It was raining, so I'm already all bluh bluh because I'm having to drive in icky weather. 20 miles from school and guess what decides to pop out of my dashboard? It wasn't Brother Bee, and it for sure wasn't Spiderbro. 

It was Spider-bro's evil twin.

NOPE

THIS CAME CRAWLING OUT AT ME. Startled, I yelped! Double-taked, and I HOPED, to see a spiderbro, just trying to get out of the rain. Instead it was NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE. I nearly wrecked my car trying to get away from it as it quickly darted at me, laughing maniacally the whole way and disappeared into a hole somewhere in my car. IT DISAPPEARED AND I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT WENT. And the bastard did it on purpose too. Because it's the NOPE YOU DON'T SEE THAT GETS YOU. This is not a spiderbro, it's the evil twin that just wants to see you in pain. This is the sort that will laugh at you while you kill yourself trying to get away from it, and when you're trapped and have nowhere to go, right where he wants you, already humiliated and pissing your pants in defeat, he bites you anyway.

20 miles from school. A choice to stay locked in the car with the evil not-bro... or walking all the way in the rain.

I nearly walked. 

Beware the evil twins you guys. They mean srs business.

P.S

He's still in my car somewhere >: