Hey Killua!
Gon Freecss, the captain of the football team, is happy with everything he has.
He's the best player in his team, loves spending time with his teammates and friends Zushi and Ikalgo, loves playing football and has a satisfactory life overall. There isn't really anything else he wants.
But then, a white haired boy with gleaming cerulean eyes stumbles into his life, proving him wrong.
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Where two boys who are lonely, one aware and one not, meet each other and fall in love.
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This fic was created for the lovely @novembermoonss as part of the Killugon Secret Cupid Exchange 2022 hosted by @killugonvalentines ! I had lots of fun making it, and I hope you enjoy reading it as well! (I was pretty surprised that I got a mutual as my valentine though, Im really happy I was able to write something for you :D Happy Valentines day!!)
Read on Ao3, or continue reading.
“Who’re you planning to make the team captain after you graduate?”
Zushi’s question was something Gon hadn’t even thought of an answer for, and it wasn’t like he had to pass on his role in the football team immediately. There were several more months until his last day in high school.
Gon thought for a minute, staring at the wave of students entering through the school gate.
“Well, maybe I could leave the job to you.” Gon smiled as he watched his junior’s eyes widen and jaw slack, just for a moment before he composed himself.
“That’s what you wanted to hear didn’t ya? Look at you blushing.” Zushi screeched at Ikalgo’s comment.
“’No! I was just asking I didn’t mean-”
“Hey, Ikalgo don’t tease him.” Gon nudged his friend’s shoulder and the other rolled his eyes.
“It’s okay my sweet sweet child, you’re our favourite underclassman anyway! C’mere let me give you a kiss~” Zushi screamed as Ikalgo caught him under his death grip.
“Back off dude!” He fought against Ikalgo, resulting in him falling back and bumping into- well, a person who didn’t seem to be having a good day. That’s what the death stare towards Zushi told Gon anyways. Gon wasn’t one to get easily intimidated, but he wasn’t so sure now as a chill ran up his spine.
“Watch where you’re going, idiot.” The tone was mean, reinforcing the menacing aura around him. His unnerving blue eyes made Zushi visibly uneasy.
“Oh- I’m sorry!”
“Whatever.”
Suddenly, those piercing eyes were on Gon. As much as he felt he was going to sink through the floor, he took in a sharp breath and stared back at him.
The pale, blue eyed boy then left. And that was that.
After a moment, Zushi ran up to his seniors as if he just experienced a traumatic event. “Holy shit, I think I pissed my pants.”
“You got scared? Don’t you have like a black belt in kung fu or something?”
“Ikalgo! You saw that guy! You were scared too!”
“I wasn’t scared!” He retaliated.
Gon had seen the said person quite a few times around school, usually not seen engaging with anyone unless necessary. Gon was pretty sure they shared the same class last year, but he had been pretty busy with club activities after all.
It was hard not to notice the boy though- not with his distinct white hair and blue eyes. Gon noticed him everywhere, but never got a chance to interact with him.
“Hey Ikalgo, do you know that guy’s name?”
Ikalgo furrowed his eyebrows. “Haven’t you seen him around school? His name is Killua, I think.” He paused for a minute. “Hey! We literally shared a class with him last year. How do you not remember?”
Gon laughed awkwardly. “Oh, come on, you know I’m not good at remembering stuff like this.”
“Why do you want to know though? Are you going to invite him to an epic stare down contest?” Zushi interjected.
“What? No-”
“Yeah, maybe since you were such a chicken!” Zushi whined at Ikalgo.
“He was scary okay?! I don’t have the talent to stare at someone like that!”
“Not with that attitude, you don’t.”
“Hey!”
***
Gon waited.
He waited for the time to pass by, like he always did. Because after school, he’d finally be able to get on the football court and get his blood pumping.
Gon wasn’t made for sitting idly in a classroom for several hours, for god's sake.
When school would finally end, he’d head straight towards the court even though club activities wouldn’t start in an hour. He’d run a few laps around the court and practice a few drills before the other members would join him. It had been his routine for the past 2 years, and after the coach and the previous captain had seen his hard work, he was named the new captain for the next year.
He loved playing with his team. Nothing could ever match the sensation he felt when he’d score the winning goal, and the constant appreciation of his team members and coach. He was the best player on the team, there was no doubt.
His after-school schedule was no different from any other day. He slung his backpack on his shoulder and left for the changing rooms immediately.
The only thing that was different was a certain white-haired boy standing just outside the football court.
He immediately sensed Gon’s presence and they made eye contact, but he wasn’t intimidated this time. The boy- Killua- must have calmed down since the scene in the morning, Gon thought.
Killua spoke first. “You’re the captain.” Gon wasn’t sure if that was a question.
“Yes? Can I help you?”
“Can I join this club?”
Gon stared at him, confused. Join a club in the final year? How was he supposed to add this guy to the team? What exactly was he thinking?
“You’re pretty late considering we’re in our last year of high school. If you don’t mind practising with the freshmen, I think you can join.” Gon replied politely.
“I’m familiar with rules and know how to play football. Can’t I join the team?”
Gon hesitated. “I think we might need to talk to the coach for that. You’ll have to wait an hour or so.”
Killua let out a displeased grunt. “Fine.” A pause. “I’m Killua.”
“I’m Gon!” He grinned at him, and Gon got a glimpse of a small smile before Killua looked away. “By the way, why’re you joining the club so late?”
Killua’s shoulders tensed. “I-uh, I got kicked out of the photography club.”
“Can I ask what happened?”
“I punched the club leader in the face.”
Okay, so this guy was insane.
“Aren’t you going to ask why?”
“I’m fine, thank you. But why the football club? Is there a reason why you want to join?”
“I don’t know, I don’t really like clubs. Everything’s boring so I randomly chose.”
Sorry, what the fuck did you say? Gon wanted to ask but he didn’t, because he did not want to be the next club leader with a broken nose. But who could blame him for being annoyed? He wanted to know where this man got the audacity to walk into the club and call it boring and that too to the club leader, of all people.
Gon tried his best to keep his tone neutral. “I see. If you want you can leave and come later; club activities don’t start until 4 pm.” Which could also be translated to please leave.
“I’ll stay here. I have nothing better to do anyway..”
Gon shrugged, and went on with his training.
He ran a few laps around the court as usual, did a few warm up exercises and tried his best to ignore the eyes following him. Gon wasn’t really annoyed with Killua staring, really, but for some reason he was more conscious of every move that he made. He sneaked a glance during the drills and Killua was studying him, his eyebrows furrowed and looking at him with utmost concentration that he didn’t even notice that Gon had stopped practising to look back at him.
Did Killua really mean it when he said he was uninterested in the club?
When the rest of the teammates joined in, Ikalgo was the first person to notice the new presence in the court. He didn’t hesitate to point it out to Zushi and howl at the way the younger man lost the colour in his face.
Later when Bisky, the coach, joined them, Gon called Killua over and they talked to her together.
“You want to join and play with the team.”
“Yes.”
Bisky stares at him for a minute. “How good do you think you are?”
“I’m not. But I’ll try to keep up.”
Gon looked over to Bisky. “What do you think we should do?”
She put her hands on her hips. “Well.. How about we split the members into two groups, and play a match? Killua, you will have to play against Gon. How’s that?”
Killua grinned, maybe for the first time that day. “Let’s do it.”
Gon’s team won the match. He really wasn’t sure what he was expecting.
Gon glanced at Killua, who was sitting on the ground wiping off the sweat on his forehead. He contemplated whether he should say something and ended up walking over and sitting next to him anyway.
“Hey Killua, you did really well.” And he really did. Killua was surprisingly fast, and his control over the ball was astonishing, dare he say, maybe as good as him. Gon wasn’t sure if he was annoyed at the fact that Killua was just a few steps from surpassing his skills, but he still couldn’t shake the rush of excitement he felt when he realised he can keep up with me. Gon wasn’t sure how long it had been since he felt that way.
By now Gon was sure that Killua was lying when he said he found the sport boring. That was too competent for being uninterested.
“I wasn’t that good…” Killua kept his eyes down.
Gon tried to get a look on the other boy's face. “No! You played really well! I almost thought you were going to beat me!” Killua perked up and looked at Gon.
“But I didn’t win. I probably won’t get into the team.”
“I think I’d like you in the team. It would be nice to have someone to keep up with me.” Gon smiled, mostly at how Killua’s already flushed face from exhaustion turned into a darker shade of pink.
And just as Gon wished, Killua was recruited into the team.
***
Killua was a diligent student, Gon had noticed, much more than the rest of the members. He arrived for practice every day on time, did his best, and sometimes even stayed afterwards just to practice alongside Gon.
Gon was a hundred percent sure that Killua was not uninterested. With what he had heard from Ikalgo, Killua didn’t work this hard in the photography club. But Gon wasn’t complaining. Now that Killua was there, he felt less lonely somehow- not that he knew he was in the first place.
Also, Killua wasn’t that scary after all. After a few months of being around Killua, all Gon could see was a really funny and extremely kind boy who was just really lonely. Gon was happy that Killua was ready to let him into his life, but there were still so many things he didn’t know about. Killua loved to talk about his sister, but he didn’t like talking about the rest of his family for some reason, so Gon tried not to bring up the topic at all.
Another thing Gon noticed was, Killua was really good looking.
He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t thought about this the first time they met, or even during the first month they actually spent together as friends. But now that he had seen Killua laugh, watched as he smiled at him for the most random things, noticed how his cheeks flushed with every compliment and saw the content look on his face when he ate chocorobos, he thought Killua was beautiful.
“Gon, are you going to stay after practice today?” Gon smiled at the now familiar voice.
“Yeah. Are you staying too?” Gon asked as Killua sat next to him on the changing room bench and watched as he put on his shoes.
Killua looked at him sporting a catlike grin. “Won’t you be lonely if I’m not here? So, I’ll stay.”
Gon tried not to blush. “Of course, I’ll be lonely now that I’m used to you around...” He murmured, and watched Killua’s ears turn pink.
He still kept going. “You really love me that much huh?”
“Yes I do!” He leaned onto Killua, who immediately shot up from his seat, face burning a bright red.
“You’re so embarrassing! Let’s just go practice.”
“You were the one who asked me!” Gon whined, running after Killua.
The fact that Killua was getting better every day at football was something that popped up in Gon’s head every time during practice. He himself had improved a lot it seems, and he realised he still had a lot of room to improve. It was also a fact that they were a really good team. Bisky was also satisfied with her decision to add Killua into the team, as it seemed to be paying off.
After practice, when Gon had changed his clothes to go back home, he saw that Killua was still outside unlike other days where he leaves early.
Killua noticed Gon coming out of the changing room. “Ah, Gon. I was wondering if you wanted to walk home together.”
“Huh? Oh, Sure!”
And that was what they did.
The sun was already setting by the time they headed out, Gon tightened the strap of his backpack as they walked along side by side. He peered at Killua, his hair looked slightly orange because of the sunlight, and his eyes were bright.
Killua looked back at him. “What’re you looking at?”
You. “Nothing.” He stretched his hands over his head and groaned.
“Tired?”
“Mhm.” Gon moved closer to his friend, noticing it was getting dark. He wasn’t really sure if that was the reason he was moving closer. “Hey Killua?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s getting dark.”
“’I know.”
“Can you hold my hand?”
Silence.
“Why?”
“I can’t see properly. And I’m tired.”
Silence again.
“Okay.” Slender fingers intertwined with Gon’s, the hand was calloused and rough, but even so it felt nice to hold. Gon moved even closer, almost leaning completely on his friend.
“Don’t pass out.” Killua laughed.
“Hey Killua?”
“Hm?”
“I want to be your best friend.” Killua laughed again.
Gon liked hearing Killua laugh.
“I want to be your best friend too.”
“Then we’re best friends.”
“Are we?”
“Yeah.”
Exhaustion was already creeping into Gon, and he stifled a yawn. They were walking much slower than before.
“Dude seriously, don’t pass out.”
“I won’t.” Gon grumbled. “Hey Killua!”
“What now?” He tried to sound annoyed, but the smile on his face said otherwise.
“Tell me a secret, Killua.”
Killua’s hands loosened for a minute, and just for a moment, Gon thought that he made a mistake.
“You’re my first best friend.”
Gon gasped. “Really?”
“Yeah. Now you tell me something.”
“Hmm… I think Killua's really pretty.”
Killua didn’t let go of his hand. “That’s embarrassing.”
Gon couldn’t really see Killua’s face because of how dark it was now. The streetlights weren’t turned on just yet, but the sun had already set. “How is that embarrassing? I’m just telling the truth.”
“Don’t make me knock you out and leave you on the street.”
“You wouldn’t.”
Killua hummed slowly, with a soft smile on his face.
***
“What’s going on between you two?” Ikalgo asked Gon, as he watched him carefully bounce a football on his feet.
“With who?” Gon asks back, concentration not wavering. Forty-seven, Forty-eight, Forty-nine-
“Killua.”
He drops the ball.
“What about him?” Gon finally turned his attention towards his friend.
“…Gay?”
They stared at each other.
“What?”
“Are you both- Uh- Never mind.” Ikalgo sighed
Gon looked over to where the ball had rolled over, and his eyes trailed to Killua somehow. He was talking to Zushi- who was no longer terrified of him- with his hands on his hips. Zushi seemed to be demonstrating something, pointing out to his legs and Gon watched as Killua nodded to him while he talked.
“You’re staring at him again.” Gon tore his eyes away and saw Ikalgo with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“I wasn’t.”
“Yeah, keep lying to yourself.”
Gon scrunched his face and leaned closer to Ikalgo. “Do I stare a lot?” He whispered
“Yes you do.” He whispered back.
“Does he know?”
“Probably?”
Gon slapped a hand into his face. Oh god, this was bad.
Ikalgo put his hand on Gon’s shoulder. “My dude, it's okay. I know it's your first man crush, and you’re feeling overwhelmed-”
“I’m not-”
“But I support you! So-”
“I don’t have a crush on him!” Gon tried to keep his voice down. He really did not want Killua to know about this.
“Shh... I know you’re in denial, but it’s okay. I’m here for you buddy.” Ikalgo gave him a hug before patting him on the back.
Was he really in denial though? Was that it?
“What’s happening here? Why are you guys hugging without me?” Zushi joined in the conversation, and Gon noticed Killua right behind him.
“Our captain is upset that he doesn’t have a date for prom. You know, he isn’t really great in the romance category.” Gon pinched Ikalgo’s arm. Hard.
“Oh! Why don’t you just ask someone to go with you?” Zushi asked, oblivious to how Ikalgo hissed in pain.
“I don’t think I will!” He said with gritted teeth. Killua looked concerned.
This was really, really bad.
Gon finally pushed Ikalgo away, but ended up regretting it as he stared in horror at the stupid asshole of a friend who walked over to Killua and slung an arm over his shoulder.
“What about you, Killua? Are you asking someone out?”
“Uh yeah, probably.” He replied awkwardly.
“Oh? Good for you then.” Ikalgo flashed a grin at Gon, and for the first time ever, he had the urge to punch his friend.
He didn’t punch him.
But he was left mortified for the rest of the day. He was unable to concentrate during practice, and he ended up messing up quite a lot. He was lucky that Bisky let it slide, and he got through the day without getting reprimanded. Killua sent him a few concerned glances, but he just waved it off, assuring he was fine. He wasn’t.
“Are you really okay? You’re seriously acting weird.” Killua had asked him when they were walking home, which had become a usual thing between them.
“I’m not acting weird.”
“Everybody noticed, Gon. Are you seriously that upset about not having a date for prom?”
“No! That’s not it, you don’t understand!”
That was exactly the topic Gon did not want to discuss. He wanted to drop everything and run. Run, not look back and not have this conversation and just go back to school tomorrow and everything would be normal. Act like nothing happened and that he didn’t quite possibly develop feelings for his best friend in the past few months.
Well, Killua wasn’t having it.
“Then? Make me understand, will you?”
“I don’t know either.”
Killua only groaned, and thankfully didn’t question any further.
The time after was quite awkward and both of them remained quiet, Killua looked away and sometimes down, but never at Gon.
Killua started, still not looking at him. “If you’re really upset about the date-”
Not again. “Killua-”
“-do you want to go with me? To prom? Only if you want to.”
Gon was going to combust. What was Killua thinking? What did he mean by that? Was he asking him out of pity, because he thinks Gon is so pathetically needy for a date? Or did he actually ask out of interest?
Did he ask him out as a friend, or as something more?
Did Killua like him too?
“Why? Do you feel bad for me?” Gon laughed, because he had no idea how he was supposed to feel about this.
“No, I don’t really want to go with anyone else. It's okay if you don’t want to, don’t feel pressured.”
What are you doing to me, Killua?
“Of course, I’ll go with you!”
Killua smiled, and it made Gon feel dizzy. “Alright then.”
***
Gon wasn’t sure when was the last time he was this excited. Oh yeah, during the first match he played against Killua.
It was always Killua, wasn’t it?
Gon ended up being extremely restless that evening when he was asked to be Killua’s date, and he got out of his house late at night and ran a few miles hoping he’d get tired and finally sleep. It didn’t work.
Aunt Mito noticed the difference in his demeanour and asked him about it. He just laughed and replied that he did really well in practice, it wasn’t like she was going to know how he fucked up during practice that day.
The rest of the days were spent as normal (almost). Something had definitely changed between Gon and Killua, which was noticed by Ikalgo, who thereby had seemed to swear on his life to tease Gon to death.
When Gon finally told Mito about his date, she was overjoyed and took it upon herself to make him look his best that day because Mito did not trust him when it came to choosing clothes. He kept insisting that he and Killua weren’t actually dating and only going as friends, so don’t worry too much, to which she gave him a placid look.
“I was wondering who made you walk around all the time with that lovesick look in your eyes. There’s no need to act cool.” Gon only looked away in embarrassment.
Gon was a nervous wreck when the day finally arrived. Goddamit, this was nothing to be scared of! He always kept his cool at all times, even during big matches. How is something trivial like this making him lose his composure? This was ridiculous.
Gon realised when he finally saw Killua outside his door in his dark navy suit, that this was anything but trivial. As much as Gon wanted to tackle him and kiss him all over his face, he instead invited Killua inside. Mito seemed extremely happy to meet the taller boy, greeting him with a hug and later sharing some unnecessary embarrassing details about Gon.
“Oh! Let me just get my phone so I can get a picture of you both.” Mito giggled and got up from the table they were seated in.
“You look nice.” Gon told Killua, as they finally got a chance to look at each other properly. Killua’s face turned red at the compliment.
“You look nice too.” He smiled. “I’m sorry, I didn’t bring any flowers.”
Gon chuckled. “You didn’t need to anyway.”
“I wanted to, though.”
Gon patted on Killua’s thigh and whispered, “You’re here. That's more than enough.”
The walk to school was just like any other day, except the fact that they were holding hands. He didn’t really remember how it happened or who reached out first, but he liked holding Killua’s hands and Gon wasn’t one to complain. And he didn’t want to give himself too much hope, but he wasn’t really sure if they were actually just going as friends. Killua hadn’t specified anything anyway.
But did he really have the right to wish for the best-case scenario?
The hall was filled with students by the time Gon and Killua had arrived. He could feel Killua's hands slightly shaking, and soon enough tried to slip his hand away, but Gon held on tight.
The members of the football club were there, and Gon spotted Ikalgo in between the group, who also spotted him- and unfortunately, who he was holding hands with- and looked at him with the smuggest smile he had ever seen.
They just ended up hanging out with the group, with Gon ignoring Ikalgo and his antics as much as possible, talking about random things and laughing. He just kept wondering what exactly they were supposed to do at prom. Killua wasn’t sure either, when he asked him.
The drinks provided by the school were overly sweet- Gon had noticed, he himself wasn’t able to drink much. But his friend who was addicted to sugar seemed to like it, even though he kept complaining how there wasn’t a trace of any other chocolate other than white chocolate in the whole room.
“This is boring.” Killua sighed. They both weren’t interested in joining the other kids in the dance hall anyway.
“Yeah, I guess. What should we do then?”
Killua thought for a moment. “Let’s get out of here, I’ll take you somewhere else.”
***
'Somewhere else' happened to be the school rooftop.
The air was much cooler on the school rooftop, but still comfortable as the wind blew slowly. It was silent as much as it could be, the muffled noise of the music playing many floors below and the leaves rustling were the only sounds. Gon looked at Killua, and the other looked away, simply ignoring the benches and sitting down on the floor.
Gon allowed himself to settle down next to him, maybe a bit closer than he had planned as Killua’s thighs brushed against his when he tried to sit comfortably. The only lighting on the rooftop was due to the moon, a soft light that somehow made Killua look as if he was glowing. Gon couldn’t tear his eyes away from him, even when Killua had turned to look back at him.
“Hi.” Gon blurted out.
“Hey.” Killua grinned, unaware of what it did to Gon’s heart. “Do you think it’s weird that I brought you here?”
“Nope. It’s nice, really.”
Gon wanted to tell him that he didn’t want to be anywhere but there, next to Killua at that moment, and maybe several more times. He wanted him to know this. But really, where was the line? How far could he allow himself to go until it was obvious, where his heart was kept out vulnerably open just for Killua to see?
Would Killua even like that?
“I used to come here every day before I joined the football club.” Gon stared at Killua, who was staring off into the sky, eyes soft in a way that meant he was thinking of a fond memory.
“Why don’t you come here anymore?”
“I do, but only sometimes now.” Killua pulled his legs closer to his chest and wrapped his hands around them.
“Why?”
“I don’t have a reason to anymore.”
“Why not?”
Killua thought to himself, a little bit of hesitation was obvious in his reply. “Because- uh- I’m in the football club now, I guess.”
Gon furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “I don’t get it.”
“Don’t think about it too much.” Killua sighed, before covering his face with his hands. They sat in silence for a while and Gon felt Killua lean closer to him. “You know, my parents didn’t want me to join any clubs.”
Oh, he’s talking about his family.
“They only wanted me to join a club if it would get me a scholarship or something. They never cared about what I want, or what I like.” Killua looked upset, but Gon didn’t know what to say. So, he kept listening.
“They have these… all these expectations, they have already decided my future for me, and I just hate it. I just wanted to piss them off by joining the photography club, but the club leader was annoying- I think you know how that went.”
“Do you think joining the football club is what your parents want?”
“Yes, but not really? I like being in the club and being able to play anyway, so it doesn’t matter that much. I don’t really care what they think.”
Gon felt his mouth quirk upwards to form a smile. “I’m happy that you are doing what you like. And that you don’t think football is boring anymore.”
He was met with a puzzled look. "When did I say it was boring?"
Gon mirrored the expression. "When you asked to join?"
"I did?"
“Yeah? How do you not remember that..” Gon trailed off, and the next part was mumbled, too inaudible to notice. “..you kind of pissed me off that day.”
“I actually don’t remember saying that.” He furrowed his eyebrows.
“You did!” Gon reiterated. “You were probably lying then, if you don't remember.” He huffed.
Killua cleared his throat. “Maybe I was.”
Gon continued to observe Killua, who noticed, but refused to make eye contact.
“Hey Killua.”
“Uh- yeah?” Killua knew what was coming, he definitely did.
“Why did you join the football club? What's the real reason?”
Killua tensed next to Gon. “Because I wanted to.”
“Is that really the only reason?” Gon raised an eyebrow, unconvinced. Killua was obviously hiding something.
“Well-” Killua wringed his hands, and momentarily glanced at Gon “- I wanted to get to know you. And be your friend. I guess.”
Gon’s breath stuttered. The words spoken were genuine and soft, and Killua looked so unfairly lovely next to him, with his cerulean eyes looking bluer than it ever has and it was too much.
And Killua continued speaking while Gon asked himself to get a grip. “I enjoy playing football with you now, and the team. I really do.” Killua was wearing a frown on his face, his cheeks coloured a light shade of crimson. “It probably sounds weird and selfish that I joined a club just to be your friend. Maybe a bit stalkerish but-”
Inhaling, sharp and quiet, Gon gathered up enough courage to gently place his hand on top of Killua’s. “I don't see anything wrong with that. It makes me happy that you thought that way and… I really like spending time with you too, Killua. I’m glad you came along.”
Killua finally met Gon’s eyes, and he tried his best to read this boy who seemed to glow brighter than the moon that night. For some reason he looked vulnerable, scared even. Killua timorously let his cold, shaking hands hold onto Gon's in a firm hold, who put his other hand on top of their intertwined ones.
There is something he wants to say, Gon thought, because he knew what it meant when Killua looked at him that way.
“Gon-” His voice slightly wavered. Gon nodded his head to encourage Killua to keep going.
“Ugh- this is really hard.”
“Take your time.” Gon didn't dare hope too much, even though the current atmosphere around them hinted towards it.
But maybe he did. He hoped, just a little bit.
“Uhm, I kind of.. like you. In that way.” Gon swallowed thickly, as he stared wide-eyed and breathlessly at Killua.
"Kind of?" Was the only thing Gon could say, and he couldn't control his smile as he felt his eyes crinkle from happiness. Killua looked back at him and smiled as a giggle broke out of Gon.
"No, a lot, actually."
Gon's heart was beating harder than he ever thought it could, and he felt his tummy tingle when he saw Killua look at him like he meant everything to him.
He removed the hand atop their intertwined ones and placed it on Killua's cheek, his heart melting at the way he leaned into his hand. It made him want to cry and laugh at the same time- it really was too much for his poor heart to handle.
Killua placed a hand on Gon’s chest, surprise visible in his face because he probably felt his heartbeat underneath his palm, and that was all it took for Gon to remove his hands from Killua’s and tug the other boy closer to himself, winding his arms around his waist for a hug.
He felt Killua’s nose dig into his neck, shivering slightly when he felt his warm breath there. Gon's palm flattened on Killua’s spine as he slowly caressed his back, and Killua’s fingers found themselves in his black hair, gently rubbing along his scalp and Gon felt more relaxed, and more at home than he had ever in a very long time.
They stayed like that for a while, until Gon noticed the absence of music from below, which was followed by the noise of students exiting the school. Gon slowly pulled away from their embrace even after Killua’s protests.
“Let’s go home, Killua.” he said, tugging at Killua’s hands and pulling him onto his feet. He looked down at the school gate, and saw the students leaving, a few pairs of students holding hands but most of them in groups, chatting with each other.
Gon only just noticed how clearly he could see about half of the school, including the football court from the school rooftop, he made a mental note to come here more often.
“Gon?” Killua was looking at him, with his hands in his pocket. It was a mystery how Killua managed to change his demeanour so quickly. He looked more confident, and not vulnerable like he had seen him a few moments ago.
“Coming!”
They walked home; hands clasped together again, but not speaking a word to each other. The hand holding felt different now, much more intimate than the first time they did, most probably due to the fact that Killua had confessed his feelings to him, after all. Gon was aware that he hadn’t said anything back, not a confirmation that meant yes, I like you too, but he was overwhelmed with everything he was feeling then. He could tell him now, even though Killua likely knew already after the positive reaction from Gon.
As they stopped walking as they reached Gon’s home, Killua beamed at him. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” He still didn’t loosen the grip on his hand, nor did Gon.
“Thank you for tonight.” Gon’s voice was laced with adoration, which made Killua look down at his feet with his flushed cheeks. He was pretty sure he was blushing quite a lot too, but he didn’t focus on that too much. “Hey Killua?”
“Hm?”
Heart thrumming, Gon took in a strenuous breath. “I really like you a lot too. The same way as you do.” He waited for Killua to look at him. A soft “Oh,” was the only answer, so he placed his hand just beneath Killua’s jaw, cradling it, and he swiped his thumb over the soft skin. “I’m about to do something reckless, so tell me if you want me to stop.” He said, leaning close enough that their foreheads were touching.
Killua’s eyes kept flickering from his eyes to his lips, and he placed his hands on Gon’s shoulders, moving closer to him. He watched Killua’s eyes flutter shut as their noses slid past, and so did Gon’s, when he carefully pressed his lips onto Killua’s soft ones. His knees felt shaky, but the firm grip of Killua’s hands on his shoulders kept him in balance.
It was a short kiss, but when they pulled away, Killua kept holding onto Gon, his eyes looking needy. “Please do that again, one more time.” He pleaded, leaning in again.
So, he kissed him again, but not for the last time.