oh how about alaris and his boyfriends and....... 12? or 17. for the ship kiss ask game :з
(The ship kiss ask game)
12. ...in grief.
17. …to distract.
Two kisses for two boyfriends, hm? Fair enough!
Alaris stared at the porcelain scattered around his feet, the crash of impact still ringing in his ears. It had been such a lovely teacup, a distant part of his mind lamented; part of a set Dorian had just bought, the sort that cost enough to make his head spin even now. He’d picked it up left-handed without thinking, and the Anchor had rewarded him with a sharp blaze of pain and a spasm in his fingers that left the cup in pieces on the floor before he could even think of trying to catch it.
Dorian set his own cup down in its saucer with a soft clink. “Are you all right, amatus?” he ventured. “You didn’t burn yourself?”
“I’m so sorry,” Alaris blurted out, tearing his eyes away from the shards of his cup. “I didn’t mean to…”
“Well, I didn’t think you deliberately threw my teacup on the floor,” Dorian said. “Can I ask what happened?”
“My hand—” Alaris began before he could think better of it. “...slipped,” he finished lamely. The others were worried enough about him as it was; he kept catching them staring at him when they thought he wasn’t looking, whispering about him behind his back. Even now Dorian’s brow was creased in concern, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. It looked wrong on him. “I wasn’t paying attention to it, I suppose,” he added.
The door opened at the same time as Dorian’s mouth, cutting off any further questions. Alaris was grateful until Bull walked in. “I heard something break,” he said, his eye roving from Dorian to Alaris to the teacup on the floor.
“And you certainly took your time coming to check on us,” Dorian huffed. “We’re fine. Alaris just dropped a teacup.”
Bull grunted, his gaze now fixed solely on Alaris. “A teacup, huh. How’s your hand, boss?”
“I dropped it, I didn’t spill it on myself,” Alaris said. “My hand is fine, it just slipped.” He stared down at his hand as he flexed his fingers; anything to avoid meeting Bull’s eye. The big bastard could read him too well, and he was tired of awkward questions. He could still feel his pulse pounding in his hand, sending little sparks of pain up his arm with every beat. “I’m just tired, that’s all.” The best lie was the sort that wasn't a lie at all.
“Hm.” Bull sat down on his other side, the sudden dip in the couch sending Alaris sprawling against him, and took his hand. Even the gentlest pressure of his fingers was enough to make the Anchor blaze to agonizing life; Alaris could barely yank his hand back before it made him cry out, and that was suspicious enough. “Kadan—”
“Just tired,” Alaris repeated, trying for a reassuring smile. “It’s been a long day.”
He stood, and the other two stood with him. “I think we could all do with some sleep before—” Dorian began.
“No!” For a moment the three of them just stared at each other; then Alaris cleared his throat. “No, I… don’t think I’ll be able to sleep until this is done. You two should rest, though”
He wanted nothing more than to let Bull and Dorian change his mind. He’d missed being able to go to bed with them ever since the last time the three of them were in the same place. But going to bed meant taking his gloves and coat off, and under his left glove and sleeve was the pulsing wreck of green veins and blackened flesh that was the Anchor. It would be better for everyone if he didn’t let them see it. Better to let them pretend things would be fine a little longer. And if he didn’t wake up—
…Well. If he didn’t wake up he didn’t want them to be the first to find him.
“I’ll see you in a few hours,” he said, praying it wasn’t a lie.
“We can stay up with you,” Dorian offered. “I’m sure neither of us would mind keeping you company…”
Alaris rolled his eyes. “Go to sleep. There’s no need for you two to wear yourselves out worrying about me.”
Dorian’s protests sputtered to a halt as Alaris cupped his face in his hands and cut him off with a kiss. It only took a moment for him to stop trying to speak, instead pulling Alaris closer against him, kissing him so slow and gentle that Alaris could feel tears pricking in his eyes. If this is the last time, some small part of his mind whispered, it’s at least a good one. “I love you,” he said when they pulled apart. “You know that, right?”
“I love you too,” Dorian said, only sounding a little dazed.
“Hey, any love left for me?” Bull playfully shoved his way between them, bending down to smack an obnoxiously loud kiss against Dorian’s temple. He ignored the other man’s complaints as he turned to Alaris. “Boss?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
It felt like the first time Alaris had laughed in months. He was almost disappointed when Bull silenced it by tipping his head back with a finger under his chin and kissing him. Only almost, though; one of Bull’s big hands carded through his hair, the other moving from his chin to the back of his neck, and he melted into it without hesitation. It’s a good one, he thought again.
When Bull pulled away there was something far too knowing in his gaze, but instead of saying anything he just kissed Alaris on the forehead. “I’m gonna stay here, actually,” he said. “Keep you company. Dorian?”
“Why not?” Dorian flopped back down on the couch, lounging against the arm. “We can make a party of it!”
“Why not,” Alaris echoed.
In a few hours it would all be over, one way or another. But for now Alaris could settle back down between Bull and Dorian and let himself forget what was to come.
