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8 million people

Some mornings the sky is so clear and blue, the kind that seems to recall summer although no one has told the temperature, and for some reason I can see every individual brick on the neighboring building. I slowly see lights click on in various windows and catch glimpses of people making coffee and watering plants. I think about the buses, the trains, the bridges all leading into this minuscule metropolis and how each of those people was born, somehow, and chose New York, or grew up in New York, or have to be in New York.

New York City is the only place I’ve ever lived where people ask you why you’re here. “Why did you come to New York?” they’ll say in the bar or on the street or in a job interview, as if they’re saying “What’s it to you?” or “Do you really think this the place for... you?” and each time for me the answer is satisfactory because I tell them that I am pursuing a Master’s degree. Ah yes, the security blanket of higher education, that is a fine reason to be in New York.

But it makes sense. There are so many people here and it is not an easy place to live. Maeve Brennan talks about how Manhattan is one of the only places in the world where living there is an active obstacle against your path to happiness and success. Maybe that’s why it’s an artist’s rite of passage to live here. Maybe that’s why it’s satisfactory that I’m here for my Master’s. There is this transience that dusts the city each morning, a call for those who’s roots are light and shallow to move on, a call to make way for the next wave of people who need New York, and to go find a place where your fierceness is not taken as a necessary daily measure of safety, but a rare gem, an asset.

“There’s a time to come to New York, and there’s a time to leave it.”

-- Stephen Sondheim, Company

For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

Ecclesiastes 3:1-5

Today was one of those rough days. My body is always so stressed out with the PTSD and anxiety nonsense that is makes it more likely to get sick. As you can already guess, I am sick. I am really trying to just keep it together and do a good job, but I keep worrying that I’m no good.

#thought #NYC diary #ptsd problems #personal

NYC Diary: Studio in the Sky

Airports stress me out, especially when I travel alone. I have rituals that help ease the anxiety, like a cup of chai and strategizing the perfect seat with a view of the gate, but away from the crowds, preferably at the end of an aisle without anyone facing me. Once I survive the airport, I make the most of my time on the plane. Of course, sketchbooks or regular books are nice to have on hand, but as an iPad addict, I have found ways to make the most of "my precious" while existing in Airplane mode.

For this trip, I downloaded several past issues of Professional Artist Magazine and their pocket guide, Financial Strategies for Artists. These digital versions are available for a fraction of the original price and so much of the information is still relevant even a few years after the publishing date. I picked up Feb/Mar 2014 for articles like Track Your Bottom Line and Adjust Your Career Course. May 2012 had How to Price Your Artwork and Organize Your Career. If you want something more timely, Offline Reader apps allow you to download webpages.

This is also a great time to catch up on boring, time intensive tasks like editing your reference photo library or just a time for brainstorming. If you read my post on Wunderlist, you know this is where I keep all of my creative inspirations and how I organize for future projects. In fact, I am writing this in my "Blog" section so I can post it later when I have an Internet connection.

If I want a more hands-on experience, I pull up the Brushes app. Technically, it is a drawing app, but mainly I use the layering feature for compositional problem solving on current projects or mashing reference photos for future paintings.

Even when you are away from the studio, there are ways you can improve your art business!

#NYC Diary