#oaklandstandup

[bdoss24]

Oh yeah @chefsmelly on me tomorrow!!! #OaklandStandUp

[ochoemik]

Sometimes I switch up and hop on the Bart. Look how the kid appear! That's my presence in Oakland! #OchoE #thewave #LongLiveTheAyatollah #Oaklandstandup #O4L

[ochoemik]

It was really lit yesterday!!! #SupportArt #HipHop #LongLiveTheAyatollah #OchoE #O4L #Oaklandstandup

[diasporadoll]

grat·i·tude

Jan 25, 2015

This week, I’ve received several lessons from new teachers and the result is a feeling of refreshment and satisfaction.

My first teacher this week was someone from my youth. A woman I’ve come to appreciate as an adult and peer. She was close to my younger sister growing up and our mothers were also friends. We danced together under the tutelage of Latanya d. Tigner as members of Dimensions Extensions Performance Ensemble. Thanks to Facebook, I’ve come to know her journey and good works as an international entrepreneur. In addition to being a force to be reckoned with in the business world, Bibi Gnagno is a style icon, ascending. Three degrees? Check. Fulbright Scholar? Check. Documentarian? Check. Hair Coach? Check. Oh and she’s current living and working in Côte d'Ivoire. Her LinkedIn profile is in FRENCH, people! Check out her lifestyle and natural hair site OMG I Love Your Hair. When Ryan Nicole raps about “3 college degrees” on Jenn Johns' Town’d Out, a hot sizzling braggadocious ode to Oakland, she’s talking about people like Bibi Gnagno. (Oakland, Stand The Hell Up!)

Last weekend, I tuned into Bibi’s current offering, a webinar series entitled ‘4 Secrets on How to Get Out of the Rut and Unstuck in 2015’. My intention was to support my friend in her efforts, though I’m not in a rut. In fact, I would describe this moment in my life as an awakening. I feel like a bird taking off in flight. One of the exercises Bibi explained and prompted us to try is called The Blessings Game. When you experience a deep hurt or struggle with someone in your past or present, often times it’s hard to move on, even if the person you see as causing the pain is long gone. Bibi shared a personal story and then described how she played the Blessings Game every single day until she was able to forgive the agent of her suffering. In her case, she played it 365 times (word.) So, I’m sure you’re wondering how the game is played…it’s quite simple and yet so complicated. Every day you bless the person you are unable to forgive with good things, things you want for yourself. You bless them with prosperity, career success, love, peace, serenity, a spacious home, abundant family, fame etc. Whatever you want for yourself, you also wish those blessings for that other person’s life. Every day. Until forgiveness arrives. I am so excited and relieved to play the Blessings Game! I have felt a weight upon myself as that bird ready to soar, like invisible tethers tied to heaviness. Resentment is heavy. Control is heavy. Anger is heavy. Pettiness is heavy. Shade is heavy as hell. The Blessings Game gives me an action step of divine intentionality with which to acknowledge what I can’t forgive, but not stop there. To move through the unforgivable, naming that label as an illusion. I’m going to take a brief moment to be grateful that I’m only blessing one person when I play the game.

My second teacher this week was the POC Sangha itself. As I’ve mentioned before, I have become a faithful attendee at EBMC’s Thursday night sit. For a description of what we do, I’ll quote their website, “The People of Color Sangha is a growing tribe of people of color waking up and getting free!" During the 2 hour gathering, I participate in a 30 minute group meditation guided by a guest speaker who then provides a dharma talk on various timely and relevant topics impacting communities of color and those seeking understanding of the Buddhist path. You don’t have to be Buddhist or good at meditating. Just be Brown and down. Okay, back to Thursday… Usually during the brief break, I go into the kitchen and have some tea. It’s a great way to come out of a meditative state. When I use the EBMC kitchen, I always try to have coins or a few dollars to contribute to the buying of more tea/sweetener as they are a donation-based facility and organization. I usually drop money in the little Tea Dāna basket and then grab a mug. Earlier in the day, I’d been complaining to my coworker that I haven’t had my favorite tea in several weeks because the Safeway by my house stocks it on the very top shelf and I’ve lately been too self-conscious to flag down a tall grocer to help me reach it and there’s been no vertically-gifted civilian in the aisle that I could ask a favor. So, I’ve gone without. Pride intact but no tea. This week, I walked into the kitchen and realized I had no cash on me but I was still going to have a cup. To my surprise, I see a brand new box of my favorite tea staring back at me lovingly. And I did feel the love as I contentedly sipped away.

The dharma talk this week was provided by a beautiful Queen named Shahara Godfrey. In the few months I’ve been coming to the POC Sangha I’d never seen it led by a Black woman and the experience was profound. Not only was her meditation guidance timely and perfectly sparse but her dharma talk was punctuated with enlightening poetry, weighted speech on love, and beautiful tie-ins to the life and legacy of Dr. King. At one point she scanned the packed room and we made eye contact; I nearly burst into tears. Mirroring cannot be underestimated. Dr. Godfrey’s voice and message were a reminder to love at all costs. Love anyway. Everything she said, I applied to myself first, then to my relationships with others. I had already stated that intention by committing to the Blessings Game: blessing (forgiving) myself and then blessing (forgiving) the other. I was feeling all warm and cozy and then Dr. Godrey said these words: Forgive everyone for everything. You could feel the oxygen leave the room as most of us took a deep inhale on that one. EVERYone? for EVERYthing? Dang. That’s a cold piece of enlightenment, right there. I was so grateful to see another way to untether myself and fly.

My overarching lesson this week is about the feedback loop of Forgiveness and Gratitude. I am coming to know that one begets the other and I see the never-ending cycle replaying across many realms in which I dwell, in my family relationships, in my clinical work, in my meditation practice, and in my journey toward an authentic life. As February approaches and I near my 34th birthday, I even see the Forgiveness/Gratitude loop represented in the zodiac symbol for Pisces. (BTW: We get it, it’s Aquarius season, geez. Y'all are turned up!)

grat·i·tude ˈɡradəˌt(y)o͞od/  noun

the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness

So today, I am grateful for new lessons from unexpected teachers. I stand in gratitude to webinar leaders, Sangha teachers, meditating with friends, dinner dates, drums from Haiti, Tea Dāna, and Oakland. 

 Forgive and be Blessed

#TheEND (Empress Next Door)

[janaenikole-blog-blog]

Wings, beer, playing Uno, and The b-ball game... my current situation #sportsbar #OaklandStandup @tonka_boy_dre over here cheating on the uno game... lol smh #wheelpowerco