after a time of not really wanting to put this in writing because of the feeling of guilt when i say it. i don’t find anyone ugly. like in the most real way possible no one i’ve met it is unattractive to me. are there people who look more conventionally attractive than others? yes. but you don’t look ugly to me sorry.
this is absolutely not groundbreaking or unique but the reason i said i didn’t want to have it in writing because of the feeling of guilt is because i HAVE called people that. no, not to their face (which is still not any better) but more so in passing. like. example.
friend: X was mean to me yesterday (proceeds to describe mean thing)
me: what!!! you are so much better looking than X plus (proceeds to describe negative aspects of X outside of looks and defends + comforts friend)
this is an example that i cannot actually recall happening (lol….) but situations similar to this have.
when someone does someone else close to me, or me wrong one of my first things to comment on is their looks. if they are unconventional i will comment on that and if they are good looking to most ill comment on how they’re too good looking to be doing that. even though i don’t truly mean these things i still say them out of defense for the side i am on, despite it truly being irrelevant. this also applies when someone ELSE comments on the antagonists looks, because i will then feel the unnecessary and uncomfortable need to agree with them despite the fact that i do not.
an example of this.
there was a girl who i was once friends with, and things were alright! then i became more and more aware of her toxic personality traits. she also did some weird things. naturally, i distanced myself from her and fast forward she is known among me and friends as a bad person, so occasionally we make callbacks to her. sometimes when these callbacks are made, she is called ugly. whether it’s by me or someone else. but when it’s said i can’t help but mentally disagree because she’s truly not — atleast to me.
and it gets me thinking. if she were a better person and we had all stayed friends with her, would she still be called ugly? i highly doubt it. if i had also done something to be unfriended, would i be called ugly? maybe.
everyone points out physical “flaws” when someone does something wrong but what about the people who have the same “flaws” but they didn’t do anything bad.
we as a society place entirely too much value in looks of others, i have fallen victim to this. and then chances are the two total people who will actually read this have also fallen victim to this. i think we are simply at a point of no return when it comes to that though and all we can do is continue to teach the basic lessons of kindness and empathy to future generations.
is this deep? no… i am aware that me and 1 billion people have felt the same way .. a girl can type though.
anyway. moving on.. my goal is to stop calling people ugly. and if i do call someone that it will be referring exclusively to personality, actions, and thoughts.
