This is so TOXIC!!
tw: gun mention, threatening, breaking and entering, cursing, some grabbing.
Fictional girlfriend (Riley) is AGGRESSIVE.
minors dni!!
—————————————————————————
It was the first time I had ever tried to leave her.
In retrospect I should have known it would never work, but I was just so fed up in the moment.
“You’re not being honest with me and I don’t know why” I yelled.
“It’s been six months and I don’t know what you do for work, why you come here at all hours of the night, or why you’re always so secretive?” I list out in frustration.
It didn’t make any sense, I had told her everything about me, she had seen all of my flaws, but when it came to her, I didn’t know anything. It felt like she was a figment of my imagination, always coming and going.
I hated that feeling.
“I told you not to fucking worry about it” she grits.
She steps toward me. Grabbing me by the backs of my arms and sitting me on the table harshly, a glass goes over the edge and cracks.
“What the fuck is so hard about listening to me, huh?”
She grabs my face, forcing eye contact.
“All I ask is for you to be here and do what the fuck I tell you to do.”
“Stop being such a whiny fucking brat before I treat you like one” she threatens.
I fight out of her hold and shove her away.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, why are you treating me as if I’m wrong for wanting you to trust me, for me wanting to know more about you.”
“Watch your mouth” she warns.
I scoff at her, defeated.
“This is ridiculous, I’m not going to try and make this work” I walk toward the bed room.
“I’m done.”
I feel her hand snake its way on the back of my neck, I’m pulled towards her, my back flush against her chest.
I can feel my head getting fuzzy from her grip on me.
“You don’t see that gun on the table?” She asks, leaning close into my ear and laughing.
My eyes widen.
“You wouldn’t-“ my voice shakes.
“No- no I wouldn’t do that to my girl, my doll, I wouldn’t think of it” she says sweetly.
“But you’re not acting like my girl, you’re acting like a stupid fucking brat, and it’s really starting to piss me off.”
“You don’t wanna piss me off, right doll?”
She asks smiling.
“No, I-I’m sorry” I breathe out.
“I don’t wanna piss you off” I finish.
She turns me so that I am facing her.
“Atta girl, see how easy that is” she holds my head in her hands and plants a kiss on my forehead.
Something I would usually melt into, made my back stiffen and my eyes well with tears.
She had never spoken to me like this.
“Now I’ve got to finish some work upstairs, ok?”
I nodded, peeking up at her, only half listening.
“Ok” I whisper.
She nods and walks away.
Halfway up the stairs she stops and looks back at me, noticing I’m standing right where she left me.
“Get this cleaned up down here” she walks to her office and closes the door behind her.
I looked at the glass, and I made up my mind.
“I’m not staying for this shit” I whispered to myself.
I walked upstairs and peeked into her office, her back was turned and she had her headphones on, she didn’t even realize I came in.
I left a note on the counter.
‘Clean it yourself, I’m done’
I quickly packed my bag, grabbed my phone and shoes and walked out the door.
As I made my way back to my apartment my mind was swirling.
I didn’t know how she would react but I couldn’t concern myself with that right now.
If I contemplated my actions for a second I knew I would turn around.
I didn’t deserve to be spoken to that way.
As I walked into my apartment, it was cold, I could even remember the last time I was here.
I settled back in and tried to rack my brain around why it was so hard for her to open up to me.
I had never seen her that angry before.
——————————————————————
It had been three painful weeks since I had left.
Life had just started to feel normal, I was finally able to not cry at the mention of her name.
I assumed that what happened was a break up.
It isn’t what I had wanted, but if she didn’t trust me enough to at least tell me what she did for work, I couldn’t deal with that.
The problem was that I assumed she would just let me go.
I was wrong.
I was walking home from work when I felt it.
Her presence.
It was like a ghost or something.
I brushed it off as just me missing her.
I unlocked the door and walked in. It was pitch black and eerily cold.
“You have fun?” it was her.
I gasped while holding my chest and reached for the light switch.
When the light clicked on I could see her. In all of her glory.
“Did she get bigger” I thought.
“I asked you a question” she pressed on.
I stood there, unsure of what I should say.
Nothing about these past three weeks have been fun.
“I don’t know what you expected me to do” I whisper out.
“I was begging for you to trust me and you made it seem like that was too much for you so I just removed myself”.
“All I did was ask what you did for work, and you threatened to fucking shoot me!” I started to yell out of frustration.
How could she not understand why I left?
“I didn’t tell you, because It’s not your business to know, I’m trying to keep you separate from this shit.” She stalked toward me, pinning me against the door.
“You have been the only consistent good thing in my life, I don’t want you being tainted by anything.”
She was right in front of me now. She reached her hand out to touch my face, I swatted her hand away.
“That’s not gonna work, you’re gone constantly, and you come back with bruises you never explain, I’m sorry I can’t just shut up and accept lavish gifts and money like some-“
“Shut up.”
“Riley don’t-.”
“Don’t what, make you quit while you’re ahead, come on doll, look I’m sorry for not being honest, I love you.”
I could feel myself giving in, all the fighting and pulling away I was trying to do, was slipping.
“Don’t patronize me Riley” I said meekly, tears welling in my eyes.
“Hey, hey don’t cry baby, you just need to come home.” She was feigning concern, she didn’t care that I was crying, she just wanted me back.
I look at the ground.
I couldn’t lie, I wanted to go back, I missed her like crazy these past few weeks.
“Hey, look at me”
I couldn’t, if I looked her in the eye, she would see right through me.
Before I knew it her had was wrapped around my face pushing my cheeks together.
“I said look at me” she gritted out, “you’re coming home, take your ass back there and pack your bags.”
I stood there in fear, but there was something else that was beneath the surface.
Arousal.
The way she commanded me, as if she knew I would do anything she asked, she had me right where she wanted me.
Two light taps to my cheek broke me out of my daze.
I must have looked crazy, mouth agape, shallow breaths, pupils dilated.
She laughed.
“Baby, go upstairs and pack.” She said softer now.
“Okay” I whispered out.
I ran upstairs quickly, stuffing things into bags while she watched me from the doorway.
——————————————————————-
On the car ride back to her house, I could feel it. There was something in the air.
Her hand was on my thigh, squeezing it every now and again.
To the naked eye she looked fine, but I noticed the little things. Her jaw was tight, her knuckles were white from gripping the wheel so hard, and her gun was tucked into the waist of her pants.
“If you have something to say, say it.”
“I just- I’m sorry I made you upset”
“I’m not upset I’m fucking livid, I thought that if I gave you some time, you’d be smart and come back on your own, but instead I had to come get you from your stupid ass apartment.”
She wasn’t screaming or yelling, she wasn’t even looking at me.
As we pulled into the driveway, my heart sank.
As she got out and made her way to my side my hand was on the handle to push my door open.
“Did you just try to open this door?” She asked in disbelief.
“I-I.”I stuttered out.
I knew better, why would I do that?
She stood close to me, our foreheads touching.
“Mmm you’re going to have the longest fucking night.” she breathed out. “Get in the house, go upstairs, strip but leave your panties on.”
I raced into the house and up the stairs, making sure that I followed every direction.
The sight was obscene.
There I was, on my knees, hands in my lap, completely bare besides the soft pink thong that sat high on my hips.
When she walked in, my eyes met hers.
I took her in, she was wearing just her sports bra and slacks, her hair was down, thick curls shaped into a large Afro that framed her face.
She was smoking a blunt and I could see her gun still in the waistband of her pants.
She sauntered toward me and hoisted me up, grabbing me by that backs of my arms until I wrapped my legs around her.
Her lips were on mine, it was hot and needy, she dominated the kiss, biting and pulling at my lip. It hurt so good.
One arm was wrapped around my waist while the other took hold of my throat, periodically squeezing and cutting the blood supply off to my brain, it made my head spin.
She threw me down onto the bed, all the air felt like it left my body.
I felt something hard against my thigh.
“R-Riley, your gun, you still have your gun on you.” I pleaded nervously.
“So take it out then.” She straightened out above me. “Put it on the nightstand.”
“I-I don’t want to touch it.” I grimaced.
It was a weapon, I had never touched a gun in my life, I didn’t even want it near me.
She looked at me for a second.
“I didn’t ask if you wanted to” she paused, “take it out and put it on the nightstand.”
I reached for the handle, it felt foreign in my hands.
“Look at the slide, what does it say?” She asked smiling.
Her gun was branded, with my name, in the most gorgeous calligraphy I had ever seen.
“I had that done about a week after our first date.”
The logical part of me was terrified, I should run for the hills, but the louder part of me, the part that was hopelessly in love was honored.
“Do you wanna be mine, hm?”
“Because I want you to be mine, you are mine, but you’ve got to show me baby.”
“I wanna be yours, I don’t want you to be mad at me anymore, I wanna make it up to you Daddy.” Words were coming out of me faster than I could think of them, I was acting on instinct.
It was my instinct to please her.
“Prove it to me, show me just how sorry you are.”
RILEY’S POV
Six times, we came together six times.
She’s not going anywhere, ever.
I’ve got her right where I want her, like putty in my hands.
She knows who she belongs to, I highly doubt she’ll make the mistake of trying to leave me again.
But just in case she gets some stupid ass idea the next time she gets mad at me for something, she’ll have nowhere to go.
I leave the room and go downstairs to call my right hand, Randy.
The phone rings twice.
“It’s almost four in the fucking morning Riley.” he bites out.
“I know but I need you to make sure you get her apartment packed up tomorrow, put everything in a storage unit under my name and break the lease.” I order.
“Oh so you went and got your girl back?” He said laughing.
“No get back necessary, she was never not mine.”
“
It was the first time I had ever tried to leave her.
In retrospect I should have known it would never work, but I was just so fed up in the moment.
“You’re not being honest with me and I don’t know why” I yelled.
“It’s been six months and I don’t know what you do, why you come here at all hours of the night, and why you have so much random money lying around?” I list out in frustration.
It didn’t make any sense, I had told her everything about me, she had seen all of my flaws, but when it came to her, I didn’t know anything. It felt like she was a figment of my imagination.
I hated that feeling.
“I told you not to fucking worry about it” she grits.
She steps toward me. Grabbing me by the backs of my arms.
“What the fuck is so hard about listening to me, huh?”
She pins me against the wall harshly.
“All I ask is for you to be here and do what the fuck I tell you to do.”
“Stop being such a whiny fucking brat before I treat you like one” she threatens.
I fight out of her hold and shove her away.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, why are you treating me as if I’m wrong for wanting you to trust me, for me wanting to know more about you.”
“Watch your mouth” she warns.
I scoff at her, defeated.
“This is ridiculous, I’m not going to try and make this work” I walk toward the bed room.
“I’m done”
I feel her hand snake its way on the back of my neck, I’m pulled towards her, my back flush against her chest.
I can feel my head getting fuzzy from her grip on me.
“You don’t see that gun on the table?” She asks, leaning close into my ear and laughing.
My eyes widen.
“You wouldn’t-“ my voice shakes.
“No- no I wouldn’t do that to my girl, my doll, I wouldn’t think of it” she says sweetly.
“But you’re not acting like my girl, you’re acting like a stupid fucking brat, and it’s really starting to piss me off.”
“You don’t wanna piss me off, right doll?”
She asks smiling.
“No, I-I’m sorry” I breathe out.
“I don’t wanna piss you off” I finish.
She turns me so that I am facing her.
“Atta girl, see how easy that is” she holds my head in her hands and plants a kiss on my forehead.
Something I would usually melt into, made my back stiffen and my eyes well with tears.
She had never spoken to me like this.
“Now I’ve got to finish some work upstairs, ok?”
I nodded, peeking up at her, only half listening.
“Ok” I whisper.
She nods and walks away.
Halfway up the stairs she stops and looks back at me, noticing I’m standing right where she left me.
“Get this cleaned up down here” she walks to her office and closes the door behind her.
I looked at the glass, and I made up my mind.
“I’m not staying for this shit” I whispered to myself.
I walked upstairs and peeked into her office, her back was turned and she had her headphones on, she didn’t even realize I came in.
I left a note on the counter.
‘Clean it yourself, I’m done’
I quickly packed my bad, grabbed my phone and shoes and walked out the door.
As I made my way back to my apartment my mind was swirling.
I didn’t know how she would react but I couldn’t concern myself with that right now.
If I contemplated my actions for a second I knew I would turn around.
I didn’t deserve to be spoken to that way.
As I walked into my apartment, it was cold, I could even remember the last time I was here.
I settled back in and tried to rack my brain around why it was so hard for her to open up to me.
I had never seen her that angry before.
——————————————————————
It had been three painful weeks since I had left.
Life had just started to feel normal, I was finally able to not cry at the mention of her name. I just assumed that what happened was a break up.
It isn’t what I had wanted, but if she didn’t trust me enough to at least tell me what she did for work, I couldn’t deal with that.
I was walking home from work when I felt it.
Her presence.
It was like a ghost or something.
I brushed it off as just me missing her.
I unlocked the door and walked in. It was pitch black and eerily cold.
“You have fun?” it was her.
I gasped while holding my chest and reached for the light switch.
When the light clicked on I could see her. In all of her glory.
“Did she get bigger” I thought.
“I asked you a question” she pressed on.
I stood there, unsure of what I should say.
Nothing about these past three weeks have been fun.
“I don’t know what you expected me to do” I whisper out.
“I was begging for you to trust me and you made it seem like that was too much for you so I just removed myself”.
“All I did was ask what you did for work, and you threatened to fucking shoot me!” I started to yell out of frustration.
How could she not understand why I left?
“I didn’t tell you, because It’s not your business to know, I’m trying to keep you separate from this shit.” She stalked toward me, pinning me against the door.
“You have been the only consistent good thing in my life, I don’t want you being tainted by anything.”
She was right in front of me now. She reached her hand out to touch my face, I swatted her hand away.
“That’s not gonna work, you’re gone constantly, and you come back with bruises you never explain, I’m sorry I can’t just shut up and accept lavish gifts and money like some-“
“Shut up.”
“Riley don’t-.”
“Don’t what, make you quit while you’re ahead, come on doll, look I’m sorry for not being honest, I love you.”
I could feel myself giving in, all the fighting and pulling away I was trying to do, was slipping.
“Don’t patronize me Riley” I said meekly, tears welling in my eyes.
“Hey, hey don’t cry baby, you just need to come home.” She was feigning concern, she didn’t care that I was crying, she just wanted me back.
I look at the ground.
I couldn’t lie, I wanted to go back, I missed her like crazy these past few weeks.
“Hey, look at me”
I couldn’t, if I looked her in the eye, she would see right through me.
Before I knew it her had was wrapped around my face pushing my cheeks together.
“I said look at me” she gritted out, “you’re coming home, take your as back there and pack your bags.”
I stood there in fear, but there was something else that was beneath the surface.
Arousal.
The way she commanded me, as if she knew I would do anything she asked, she had me right where she wanted me.
Two light taps to my cheek broke me out of my daze.
I must have looked crazy, mouth agape, shallow breaths, pupils dilated.
She laughed.
“Baby, go upstairs and pack.” She said softer now.
“Okay” I whispered out.
I ran upstairs quickly, stuffing things into bags while she watched me from the doorway.
——————————————————————-
On the car ride back to her house, I could feel it. There was something in the air.
Her hand was on my thigh, squeezing it every now and again.
To the naked eye she looked fine, but I noticed the little things. Her jaw was tight, her knuckles were white from gripping the wheel so hard, and her gun was tucked into the waist of her pants.
“If you have something to say, say it.”
“I just- I’m sorry I made you upset”
“I’m not upset I’m fucking livid, I thought that if I gave you some time, you’d be smart and come back on your own, but instead I had to come get you from some stupid ass apartment.”
She wasn’t screaming or yelling, she wasn’t even looking at me.
As we pulled into the driveway, my heart sank.
As she got out and made her way to my side my hand was on the handle to push my door open.
“Did you just try to open this door?” She asked in disbelief.
“I-I.”I stuttered out.
I knew better, why would I do that?
She stood close to me, our foreheads touching.
“Mmm you’re going to have the longest fucking night.” she breathed out. “Get in the house, go upstairs, strip but leave your panties on.”
I raced into the house and up the stairs, making sure that I followed every direction.
The sight was obscene.
There I was, on my knees, hands in my lap, completely bare besides the soft pink thong that sat high on my hips.
When she walked in, my eyes met hers.
I took her in, she was wearing just her sports bra and slacks, her hair was down, thick curls shaped into a large Afro that framed her face.
She was smoking a blunt and I could see her gun still in the waistband of her pants.
She sauntered toward me and hoisted me up, grabbing me by that backs of my arms until I wrapped my legs around her.
Her lips were on mine, it was hot and needy, she dominated the kiss, biting and pulling at my lip. It hurt so good.
One arm was wrapped around my waist while the other took hold of my throat, periodically squeezing and cutting the blood supply off to my brain, it made my head spin.
She threw me down onto the bed, all the air felt like it left my body.
I felt something hard against my thigh.
“R-Riley, your gun, you still have your gun on you.” I pleaded nervously.
“So take it out then.” She straightened out above me. “Put it on the nightstand.”
“I-I don’t want to touch it.” I grimaced.
It was a weapon, I had never touched a gun in my life, I didn’t even want it near me.
She looked at me for a second.
“I didn’t ask if you wanted to” she paused, “take it out and put it on the nightstand.”
I reached for the handle, it felt foreign in my hands.
“Look at the slide, what does it say?” She asked smiling.
Her gun was branded, with my name, in the most gorgeous calligraphy I had ever seen.
“I had that done about a week after our first date.”
The logical part of me was terrified, I should run for the hills, but the louder part of me, the part that was hopelessly in love was honored.
“Do you wanna be mine, hm?”
“Because I want you to be mine, you are mine, but you’ve got to show me baby.”
“I wanna be yours, I don’t want you to be mad at me anymore, I wanna make it up to you Daddy.” Words were coming out of me faster than I could think of them, I was acting on instinct.
It was my instinct to please her.
“Prove it to me, show me just how sorry you are.”
RILEY’S POV
Six times, we came together six times.
She’s not going anywhere, ever.
I’ve got her right where I want her, like putty in my hands.
She knows who she belongs to, I highly doubt she’ll make the mistake of trying to leave me again.
But just in case she gets some stupid ass idea the next time she gets mad at me for something, she’ll have nowhere to go.
I leave the room and go downstairs to call my right hand, Randy.
The phone rings twice.
“It’s almost four in the fucking morning Riley.” he bites out.
“I know but I need you to make sure you get her apartment packed up tomorrow, put everything in a storage unit under my name and break the lease.” I order.
“Oh so you went and got your girl back?” He said laughing.
“No get back necessary, she wasn’t going nowhere.”
“You’re crazy about that girl.”
“You’ve got no fucking idea” I chuckle out. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, make sure you get that done.”
MY POV
She’s moving me out of my apartment? I thought.
I felt her get out of bed and heard her dialing a number.
The part of me that wanted to protest was drowned out by the louder part of me that wanted to please her.
She got back into bed quietly, pulling me close to her, strong arms having me in an iron-clad grip.
“Ri-“
“Shh go to sleep.”