“As fascinating as this is, I have other things I’d rather be doing. Like sleeping.” - OiAsa
“Asahi! Get in here! Now!” Asahi bolted upright in bed, woken suddenly by the screech from the living room. Asahi checked the clock on the nightstand and registered the time as 2:47AM. Grumbling, he got out of bed and swore to exact revenge as quickly as possible.
“What the ever loving fuck do you want, Tooru?” Asahi leaned against the doorframe, staring down the insanity that greeted him in the living room.
Living with a mystery and thriller writer was not what Asahi had planned for his life. Falling in love with him was a whole new level of surprise. But when Tooru’s first manuscript had landed on Asahi’s editing desk all those years ago, he couldn’t help but be attracted to the mind behind such a convoluted story. As the years went on, Tooru won award after award, Asahi by his side. At some point, he’d even been dubbed the Japansese Harlan Coban. Asahi was so, so damn proud of him.
Except for right now. Right now, Asahi kind of wanted to smother him with a pillow.
“Look!” Tooru pointed at the pinboard that he’d placed in front of the TV. “I think I cracked it! I think I figured out where this story is going!” Asahi gazed at the board Tooru was manically pointing at. There were Post-It notes in various colours pinned here and there, some attached to each other by various coloured yarns, others free-standing. It looked like a manic murder board from all the cheesy detective movies Tooru liked to watch. And Asahi was way to tired for this shit.
“As fascinating as this is,” he drawled, “I have other things I’d rather be doing. Like sleeping. Which you should also be doing.”
“But Asa-chan! This could be my greatest hit yet!” Tooru had that ‘I haven’t slept in six days and I’m running on pure spite and caffeine’ look about him that usually spelled trouble.
“Yeah, okay, that’s enough of that.” Asahi walked up to Tooru and threw him over his shoulder. “You can keep plotting your best-seller when it isn’t bullshit-o’clock in the morning.”
“You are no fun, Asa-chan,” Tooru pouted. Asahi threw him on the bed, crawled in behind him, and tucked them both in.
“I don’t care. Time for sleep.” Asahi kissed the back of Tooru’s neck and settled in. He felt Tooru melt against him with a yawn.
“Okay, Asa-chan. Whatever you say. Love you.”
“I love you too.” Asahi fell back to sleep slowly after that, listening to Tooru’s soft snores, and playing with the silver ring around his left ring finger.
“Great. Perfect. Nice.” Asahi’s voice was empty. He took a deep breath. “Fuck this,” he breathed out and turned on his heel.
Tooru’s lips twitched towards a smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever really heard you swear,” he teased, leaning to the side to peer down the hallway. The smile fell from his face as he watched Asahi tug on his boots and yank the laces tight. “Asahi?” Asahi’s shoulders were tense as he tied his boots. A wave of cool fear washed over Tooru as he watched Asahi grab his jacket from the closet and yank it on. “Asahi?” he tried again. He licked at his suddenly dry lips.
Asahi’s fingers wrapped around the doorknob and Tooru struggled to breathe. It was a horrible joke. Asahi was going to turn around and give Tooru that sweet smile of his and everything would go back to being right in the world. Not this weird off balance it suddenly was.
There was a bright flash of light when the door opened and then it was gone. And so was Asahi. The sudden vacuum of silence left in his wake was overwhelming. Thoughts swirled in his head, chasing each other down the drain of his mind, and sitting heavily in his gut. He broke the silence with a ragged gasp. He scrambled from his chair and rushed to the door, sure that Asahi was waiting just on the other side. Waiting for Tooru to come to his senses, waiting for Tooru to come after him.
The only thing waiting for Tooru was the bright afternoon sun and the sudden clamor of the outside world. He couldn’t even see Asahi’s form disappearing into the distance or whatever weird cliche his brain was trying to tell him he should be expecting to see.
Asahi was gone.
—
“What do I do?” Tooru pressed his cheek against his table, phone pressed against his ear. “It’s not like when you’re mad at me. Where I know it’s gonna be fine in like an hour and you’ll forgive me and we’re okay again and I don’t really have to do anything.”
Hajime sighed and Tooru could picture him rubbing his temple and rolling his head back and forth to crack his neck.
“Well first of all you owe me a really really good massage because you, sir, make me so tense I could cry.”
Tooru scoffed quietly but agreed. “Fair enough.”
“Second of all. Go apologize to him for whatever you did.”
“And, uh.” Tooru sat up and rubbed at the top of the table sheepishly. “If I’m not entirely sure what I did?”
Hajime took a really deep breath and growled as he let it out. “Oikawa.”
“Okay okay.” Tooru nodded to himself. “I’ll talk to him. I just. If he doesn’t. If I can’t. If, if we don’t.”
“Tooru,” Hajime said softly. And that kind of broke Tooru’s heart, the idea that Hajime felt like he needed to be so soft and gentle and careful with him. That in a friendship of decades that was usually insults and headslaps, the fact that Hajime was being so kind really made it sink in just how important Asahi had become to him and just how badly Tooru needed to fix this.
“I’ll fix this,” he told Hajime. “I’ll go and find him and talk to him and fix it and if for some reason I can’t I’ll come over and cry on your couch and go from there.”
“You’ll fix it,” Hajime agreed. “I’ll talk to you later.”
Hajime hung up and Tooru stared at his phone as the screen went dark. He’d fix this. He wasn’t sure how. But he’d do it. Because if he didn’t then he would be losing one of the best things to have ever happened to him.
—
The door swung open after two knocks, like someone had been waiting inside for him.
“He doesn’t want to talk to you,” Kageyama said blandly. Tooru had a dream like this once. But Kageyama had been wearing a party hat with little frogs on it and there had been little dancing penguins behind him and Tooru had been knocking on doors looking for his lost socks and okay maybe he hadn’t really had a dream like this but this was just as disconcerting as that dream had been.
He wanted to push Kageyama out of the way or demand to be let inside or spill everything that had happened between Asahi and himself and ask if Kageyama had any ideas on how to fix it. Instead of any of that he simply said, “I don’t blame him.” And then asked quietly, almost a little afraid of the answer, “Do you think he’d be willing to listen to me though?”
Kageyama did that thing he always did. The little head tilt while his eyes went distant and a little glazed that always unnerved Tooru because it made Kageyama seem so much older and wiser and otherworldly somehow. Then he blinked and looked at Tooru with his wide blue eyes that screamed innocence and shrugged.
“He never said you couldn’t come in. Just that he doesn’t want to talk to you.”
Tooru winced. Assuming that Asahi didn’t want to talk to him and actually hearing it from someone were two different things and the only way it would have hurt worse would have been if Asahi himself had said it. Kageyama stepped back from the doorway. As Tooru stepped inside Kageyama handed him a piece of candy and patted him on his shoulder. Then he left the house and shut the door behind him softly, leaving Tooru inside with a piece of candy, a man that he was head over heels in love with, and the sinking feeling that this wasn’t going to end well for him.
He found Asahi kind of how he expected to find him: sitting with ice cream. Tooru did not, however, expect to find him sitting in the bathtub, fully clothed. Or for the ice cream to be the entire container and not just the mixing bowl Asahi and Kageyama used for ice cream on bad days. Tooru sank onto the floor next to the tub with a sigh. The only sounds in the bathroom were the crinkle of cellophane as he unwrapped his piece of candy from Kageyama and the quiet swallows from Asahi eating his ice cream.
“So,” Tooru eventually said when he couldn’t take the silence anymore, “I screwed up. A lot.” Asahi snorted quietly and shoved another spoonful of ice cream in his mouth. “As much as it pains me to admit it I am not perfect at everything I do,” he started off flippantly, mostly just because it was habit. Pretend to be happy and coy and funny and never let anyone see you for what you are. And then it suddenly hit him that that was exactly how they wound up here. How he managed to get Asahi to the point he literally said ‘fuck this’ and left Tooru alone in his apartment. He swallowed the saliva that had built up around the candy in his mouth. And did his best to swallow his pride with it.
“I’m not perfect at everything I do,” he said more seriously. “In fact I’m nowhere near perfect most of the time. I kind of suck at life actually.” He let out a sad laugh and shook his head. “I don’t really know what I’m doing - with this apology, with my future, with life in general. I just. I know that now that I’ve had you in my life the thought of trying to figure it out, of trying to muddle my way through this the best that I can, of trying to accomplish anything more in my life. Well the thought of doing that without you being part of it somehow just scares me and hurts and I don’t have the slightest clue how to make any of this better or of how to make myself better for you or how to make us better.” Asahi had stopped eating his ice cream at some point during Tooru’s little ramble and Tooru swallowed the last of the candy and turned to look Asahi in the eye. “I screwed up a lot and the chances are very high that it won’t be the last time that I do; just a fair warning. But it would be amazing and so much more than I deserve if you would give me the chance to fix this and just, I dunno, give me another chance in general?”
Asahi dropped the ice cream container into the tub and shook his head as the spoon clattered to a stop near the drain. Tooru’s head was spinning as Asahi reached out and ran his knuckles down Tooru’s cheek.
“Remember to breathe, Tooru,” Asahi teased softly. Tooru did just that, taking a long, shaky breath as Asahi smiled at him. Then Asahi settled his hand against Tooru’s neck as he spoke, thumb rubbing against Tooru’s jaw. “And before I say anything else let me tell you that you deserve the world, okay? So try not to think you don’t deserve me because I think you deserve anything you want and if I’m that then I’m honored. And I know you’re not perfect, okay? I know. That’s just one of the reasons I feel the way I do about you. I just also know that I can’t be with someone who won’t take that mask of perfection off when we’re alone. Be the model student, star athlete, perfect son, whatever, for the rest of the world. I don’t care. But that’s not the guy who I fell for. That’s not the one I want to hold hands with when we watch crappy movies or the one I want to have waiting for me after a long week of school. I want the imperfect one who forgets I’m coming over and has alien clips in his hair and the one who refuses to let me have a bite of his melon bread and the one who can’t sleep so he does a week’s worth of homework in one night and then is five minutes late the next morning because he overslept. I want the guy who once made Iwaizumi laugh so hard he almost threw up on me and the one who Kageyama shares his candy with because he respects him despite all his flaws.”
Tooru was reminding himself to breathe again and again as Asahi’s words washed over him. He didn’t try to hide the way he was sniffling or the tears that were gathering in his eyes no matter how badly his instincts were screaming at him to do so. Asahi’s thumb swept along his jaw in a soothing touch.
“I don’t want or need you to be perfect for me Tooru. I need you to be real. I want you to be real. I want you to be able to be comfortable enough with me and trust me enough to be the you that you are when the rest of the world isn’t watching. Let the rest of the world have the perfect version of you that you need them to see. Let me have the imperfect version of you.” He brought his other hand up and cupped Tooru’s face, eyes darting as he searched it for something. “Let me love you.”
“I’m so sorry,” Tooru whispered. His voice was ragged with emotions he didn’t know how to express, that he barely knew how to acknowledge. “I’m so, so sorry. I don’t want to shut you out like that but I don’t want to ruin this either. I’m not exactly a nice person you know. I’m kind of petty and cruel and a lot of other nasty things.”
Asahi shook his head, hands so warm and gentle on Tooru’s face. “It’s okay. I can be nice enough for both of us if you need me to be.”
“I do.” He let out a watery laugh. It was like a weight was being lifted from his chest, the ropes that had been holding it in place forever slowly unraveling and snapping with each swipe of Asahi’s thumbs against his skin. “I need you. I need you to let me be petty and selfish and imperfect and I need you to be sweet and kind because I just can’t some days.” He reached up and pressed his hands to the backs of Asahi’s. “I need you because when I’m with you I feel like I have a better chance at, well, everything. I need you because some days I just can’t love myself but it’s okay because you can. You can love me even when I can’t love myself.”
“I can,” Asahi said. “And I do. I do love you Tooru.”
“What’s not to love?” He took a delicate sniffle that turned into a gross laugh when Asahi rolled his eyes. “Trick question. There’s a lot but somehow you love me anyway.”
“I do.”
“And I love you. It scares me. But I do.”
Asahi laughed as he leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together. “I kind of figured that.” His breath was warm against Tooru’s lips and his cheeks burned at the intimacy of the gesture. “But it’s always nice to hear the words.”
Asahicontinued wiping down the counter, hoping that if he ignored theshouting coming from the door it would go away. No such luck, itturned out, because Oikawa launched himself at Asahi’sback and clung to him like a koala. Asahi sighed and straightened up,moving to wipe down a table instead.
“Asa-chan,”whined Oikawa.
“Ihave to go behind the counter now,” Asahi said. “There arecustomers waiting.”
“I’ma customer,” Oikawa huffed.
“Thenget off of me and order something,” Asahi said. Oikawa dropped tothe floor and sauntered up to the counter. Asahi rolled his eyes andwalked behind the register, grabbing a cup and a marker. He wrotedown Oikawa’s usual order and handed it off to the other barista onduty.
“SoI have this problem,” Oikawa said.
“Zerofucks given. Next, please,” Asahi said. Oikawa squawked, but hemoved out of the way to let Asahi deal with the woman behind him. Hewaited until she was gone, happily sipping her frappe, before hepounced again.
“SoI have this problem,” he repeated. Asahi sighed and hung his head.
“IfI ask you what your problem is, will you go away?” he asked.
“No,but I won’t stop bugging you until you ask anyway,” Oikawa said.
“Fine.What is your problem?”
“Ineed a date to my cousin’s wedding,” he said. “A big, strongman who can shut up all my gossiping aunts with a glare or two. Andsince you’re the most intimidating person I know besides Iwa-chan,I figured I would ask you.”
“Andwhat do I get out of it?” Asahi asked.
“Freebooze and cake, and an opportunity to hear my baby stories from mygrandma,” Oikawa said. Asahi raised an eyebrow.
“Highstakes,” he said. “What makes you this desperate?”
Oikawabit his lip. He shook his head rapidly and said, “Okayso maybe I just wanted to ask you on a date,” he said. “This wasthe perfect opportunity.”
“Youcould have just asked me out to dinner,” Asahi laughed. “Youdidn’t need to make it a family occasion.”
“Yeahyeah I should have thought of that before,” Oikawa said, waving hishand in front of his face. “The point is, are you in?”
Asahithought about it for a moment. Then he grinned. “I’min,” he said.
A little thing for my precious @ohmykokuroo, my darling myn, who deserves all the sweet and sappy boys in the entire world. I love you!
It takes a few minutes, but eventually Asahi looks over to him from where he’s settled in his favorite armchair, the sun streaming in the window behind him. “Why’re you staring at me?”
Tooru grins and slides off the couch, beginning to sing even before his feet have touched the floor. “You're just too good to be true, I can't take my eyes off you.”
Asahi is already pleasantly pink by the time that Tooru makes it to his chair to perch gently in his lap, and he continues singing before he can say anything. “You'd be like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much.”
He caresses a hand down Asahi’s cheek, flushed and warm, and tilts his chin up so they can meet eyes again. Asahi only gets redder at Tooru’s attention, turns from a delicate pink to a bright red as Tooru continues to sing at him, crooning the words of the sappy love song as easily as breathing. He pulls Asahi out of the chair and Asahi follows, their hands tangled even as Tooru allows Asahi to spin them gently around the living room.
They dance around the room, twirling and spinning, until Tooru finally finishes singing, trailing off into quiet, and then Asahi holds him close to his chest, staring at him, still blushing but with a fond smile on his face, the one he only uses when he thinks Tooru is being adorable. Tooru smiles back, the soft, sappy feeling still strong, and then Asahi leans down to press their foreheads together and it increases tenfold.
He’s not sure how long they stay like that, but he knows he would do it forever if he could, at home right here in Asahi’s strong arms, the two of them perfect in each others’ hold.
@oikawararepairweek Day 3: Domestic or Summer Break/Holidays
Tooru woke with his head on Asahi’s chest, Asahi’s arms wrapped tight around his waist. It was the first day of their first vacation as a couple, and all Tooru wanted to do was go back to sleep. So he did.
When he woke again, Asahi was gone, but the bed was still warm where he had been. Tooru could hear the sound of cooking coming from the little kitchenette on the other side of their suite and smiled to himself. He rolled onto his back and spread his arms, luxuriating in the massive bed. His eyes closed for a moment and he considered going back to sleep. Then he rolled over and crawled out of the bed.
“Asa-chan,” he cooed as he padded out of the bedroom, not bothering with clothes or the like. Asahi hadn’t much either, standing at the stove in the same sweatpants he’d pulled on the night before and nothing else. Tooru slid his hands around Asahi’s waist and rested his forehead between Asahi’s shoulder blades. One of Asahi’s hands came up to rest over Tooru’s.
“What are you doing up?” he asked, his voice doing that low, rumbly thing that made Tooru’s heart skip a beat or two. He hummed and rubbed his nose across Asahi’s skin.
“Got lonely,” he murmured. “You’re warm.”
“I’m sorry,” Asahi said, in a voice that said he wasn’t all that sorry, really. “I thought you might like something to eat, since we skipped dinner last night.”
As if answering him, Tooru’s stomach rumbled right at that moment. He tightened his hold on Asahi and hummed. “Breakfast sounds lovely,” he said.
“More like lunch,” Asahi replied, dropping Tooru’s hands and reaching up for a plate. Tooru watched the way the muscles of his shoulders bunched and stretched with the movement.
“Lunch, then,” Tooru said, letting go of Asahi to give him room to work. Asahi plated their lunch and carried it over to the little table in the middle of the room. Tooru knelt in his place across from Asahi and murmured his thanks for the meal, and dug in.
It was, like everything Asahi cooked, perfectly adequate. It was one of the things Tooru loved about him, that he could take even the most luxurious recipes and make it taste like a home-cooked meal, something that warmed Tooru’s belly and fed his soul, but didn’t necessarily send him straight to worshiping at the table.
They were silent while they ate. Tooru was too sleepy to really come up with much to say, and Asahi was a quiet person by nature. It was nice, this level of peace and quiet, a lovely start to their vacation. It was only once their plates were empty that Tooru spoke.
“So what do you want to do today?” he asked. “We could go to the beach. There’s a little shopping area down there with the kinds of things you like. Or we could explore downtown. Or anything, really, it’s up to you.”
“I think for now I’d rather stay here,” Asahi said. “You can go explore if you want, but I want to relax a bit.”
“If you’re staying here, then I will too,” Tooru declared, climbing to his feet. He gathered up their breakfast dishes and took them over to the sink, washing them one by one. Asahi got up and dried what Tooru rinsed, putting them back in the cabinets. When they were all put away, Asahi went to sit in the big armchair by the window and pulled out the book he had started reading on the train. Tooru sprawled on the couch and started flicking through television channels. There was nothing on, so he turned the television off after just a few minutes. The silence pressed in around him and he frowned.
“Read to me?” he asked softly.
“You won’t know what’s going on,” Asahi said.
“Read to me anyway? I just want to hear your voice.” He craned his head up to see Asahi smiling at him. Asahi cleared his throat and began to read, something about a dragon and a sword and a need to save the world. Tooru let his voice draw him off to sleep.
When Tooru woke the third time, the sun was beginning to set. Asahi was stroking Tooru’s hair out of his face and smiling down at him.
“There’s a beautiful sunset over the water,” he said. “Come look at it with me.” Tooru smiled up at this angel of a man and nodded, his heart thudding in his chest when Asahi’s smile widened. He let Asahi pull him to his feet and guide him out of the hotel suite. They crept up the stairs to the roof access, propping the door open with a loose brick and a giggle. Asahi drew Tooru over to the edge of the roof and they sat, looking out over the western ocean and the sky turning red.
“This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Tooru whispered.
“Yeah,” Asahi said. “It is.” Tooru didn’t have to look to know that Asahi wasn’t talking about the sunset. It sent warmth shooting through him and he buried his face in his hands.
“I will push you off of this roof,” he whined.
“No you won’t,” Asahi laughed. “But I appreciate the sentiment. It’s good to know I can still make you blush, even after a year.”
“You-” Tooru huffed, crossing his arms and sticking his nose in the air. “I’m not speaking to you anymore,” he said.
“Okay,” Asahi said. “Sure you aren’t.”
“I’m not.”
“Of course not.”
“Really! I’m never speaking to you again. You’re gonna live all shriveled up and alone without the graceful tones of my voice.”
“That would be a fate worse than death,” Asahi murmured, pressing his nose behind Tooru’s ear. Tooru shivered at the touch.
“Okay, I suppose I can talk to you sometimes,” Tooru said.
“Every other Thursday?” Asahi asked.
“If you’re good I’ll even throw in a weekend here and there.”
“Sounds good.” Tooru leaned against Asahi and sighed, watching the beauty of the world around them.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Haikyuu!!
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Azumane Asahi/Oikawa Tooru
Characters: Azumane Asahi, Oikawa Tooru, Sugawara Koushi
Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, Developing Relationship
Series: Part 2 of Tears
Summary:
In the aftermath of a life changing mistake, Asahi has to learn how to live again, though he might need to accept a little help.
A little thing for @cattatonically on the occasion of her birth! I hope your day is wonderful, and I hope that this meager offering is an acceptable birthday gift. Happy birthday starshine! <3
“I can admit my faults- when I get some.” Oikawa + your choice
A third part, corresponding to this and this.
By the time Asahi got his repair shop up and running, it had been a few weeks since his untimely return. He’d sported the bruise Tooru had given him with pride - if Tooru felt enough to get violent (which was highly unusual) then clearly he still felt something. It was up to Asahi now to turn that something into good, great even, if he could manage without another punch to the face.
All things considered, Asahi thought of himself as lucky. Not only was he in charge of his own business, but things were well enough that he could hire on a couple guys to help out. Semi and Futakuchi made for great banter, and better mechanics than Asahi could have ever hoped for. Of course, he could do without finding them in all sorts of embraces around the shop, but if that was the least of his worries, he’d let it slide. For now.
Working next door to his best friends also provided a generous bonus. And with both their apartments on top of their businesses, it made for easy access to nights in with beers and pizza. It’s also how Asahi found himself on the wrong end of an intensive Daichi interrogation.
“Are you staying for a while, then, or setting up and moving on?” Daichi’s eyes were stern - Asahi knew he’d hurt both Suga and Daichi by leaving without notice. He had a lot more to make up for than he realized.
“I’m here to stay. I’m done running.” He shrugged. “And I missed you guys. It’s good to be back. It’s good to stay.”
“Does Oikawa know that? That you’re here for good?” Asahi groaned, remembering that night so many weeks ago at the bar. When he’d finally found himself away from home and semi-settled for a while, he’d grown the balls and called to tell Suga and Daichi what had transpired. While understanding, they were rightfully angry. Asahi had done what he could from a distance to rebuild their friendship. It had taken time, and Asahi was more than willing to put in as much effort as it would take - with them, as well as Tooru. Asahi sipped his beer and considered Daichi’s question.
“I don’t know if he knows I’m back for good, but I did see him. As you can recall, it did not end well.” Asahi rubbed at his jaw, absently remembering he impact. Tooru had always had spunk, but never like this. Something inside Asahi twisted. There was an entirely different Tooru for him to get to know.
“What’s your next step?”
“Wait for him to walk into my shop and drop his pants at how sexy I look covered in grease and oil.” Suga choked on his drink.
“I can’t tell if you’re being serious.” Daichi narrowed his eyes at Asahi, while handing Suga a napkin.
“Of course I’m not serious. I just wanted to see your reaction. In actual seriousness, I’m waiting for him to come to me and finally hash things out. There was a lot of hurt left behind, and I have any chance of having any sort of anything with him, we need to work that out. Preferably sooner rather than later.”
“Which is why we’ve been texting!” Suga sounded far too pleased with himself. Daichi rolled his eyes.
“Of course you have.”
“You should know better, Daichi. Oh, Suga, can I book you for next week? There’s some work I’d like done on my shoulder.” The rest of the evening progressed into a discussion of various tattoos Asahi wanted Suga to design for him, where to put them, and when to get them done.
Roughly two days later, just after his shop had closed for regular business hours, he heard the back door slam open - the door that Suga had a key to. He steeled himself, while reminding himself that he needed to be as open and honest as possible, and left his office.
“Tooru. Hi.”
“Don’t ‘hi’ me,” Tooru wheeled around, glaring and furious. “How dare you just set up shop and make yourself a permanent presence. Ten years, Asahi, it took you ten fucking years to come back!”
“Yes, it did.” Asahi kept his tone calm and even, despite his jackhammer heartbeat. Damn, Tooru was beautiful - even when he was fuming with rage.
“Did you think you’d just be welcome with open arms?” Tooru was shouting, he had every right to shout. Asahi took a deep breath. Right, honesty. That was key here.
“No, I did not. Though I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping.” Tooru’s eyes widened.
“You can’t just come back after ten years and expect me to want you.” Tooru’s tone sounded full of hurt. His eyes were shining, holding back tears. Asahi cautiously took a step forward.
“I didn’t expect anything, Tooru. Hope and expectation are two different things. But I’m back. I came back to stop running - to stop pretending that ten years made me love you less. I came back to be home, to be around all the people I care about. I came back to make amends. I came back hoping for anything you’d be willing to give me, and to earn back the rest.” His voice was soft, but cracking.
“But why didn’t you stay, then, if this is what you’ve wanted all along?” Tooru stepped forward this time. Progress.
“Because I was young, stupid, and had no idea what to do. You’d just thrown me out of your house, without my pants might I remind you, and told me you never wanted me back. So, I ran. I left.” Asahi raked a hand through his hair, yanking out the tie keeping it up in a bun. With practiced ease, he pulled it back up and secured it. Tooru was studying him, watching his movements. “You know, you could concede to some fault for kicking me out pantsless.” Tooru choked on a snort.
“I can admit my faults! When I get some.” He crossed his arms over his chest. Asahi backed down. This was not the time to assign blame. This was a time for rebuilding and moving forward.
“I’m sorry, Tooru. I shouldn’t have left.” He took another step forward. Tooru’s shoulders relaxed.
“So, you’re back. For good?”
“For good. And I’d like to get to know you all over again. If you let me.” Tooru eyed him up for a moment before sauntering back towards the back door.
“One drink. One! The bar down the street. Clean up and meet me in half an hour. I want to know how a prospective baker on his way to culinary school turns into a greased up mechanic with tattoos and piercings.” Tooru slammed the door behind him upon his exit.
Asahi raced up to his apartment, texting a large thanks to Suga on his way, and jumped into the shower in record speed. Tooru had just thrown him a bone, and he was going to go fetch with tail wagging.
