Ballad of Ophelia the Gallant
Our tale begins this fine day, with the joyful BeSad crew.
Fine companions, mostly pleasant, with a purpose true.
Six leisure acquaintances in search of fun,
queued up for a match before some must run.
A fight they did find, ten heroes contested.
Our friends met defeat, they knew they were bested.
Nine calls of sportsmanship. Nine had a good time,
but one hero turned villain, his motives asinine.
Bladed and sharp, the monster had no rounded sides.
Even in speech, only harsh tones, mostly snide.
"You assholes suck! You should be ashamed!
My Furious ilk agree, you’ve ruined this game!"
Poor Gangrene, was still connecting, left out of the loop.
Ebola asked "Om nom nom?" This did not compute!
Modi the Inebriated sighed, "What gall, this fink!
I only show up for these so I may drink!"
Skirata the Bold lamented, "What was wrong with that game?
I merely joined them because being a loner is lame!”
Caileena the Indomitable, eyes flashing with rage,
"Just ignore this buffoon! Why waste time to engage?"
"Where is Mr J the Pedantic? Two weeks neither hide nor hair!
He'd babble some long-winded explanation, and we'd no longer care!"
"Om nom nom," agreed Ebola, his tail drooping low.
"Om nom nom nom; Om nom" expressed sadly, not just for show.
Squire Juicy the Reluctant, stirred hesitantly to action,
"I guess I could say something, before this insanity gains traction.
My conflict with this monster may result in distress.
This whole argument is unfounded and completely pointless."
Then flashed general chat, a noble clarion call!
Ophelia the Gallant, with wise words for us all!
"You are jerk, bully, and beast! Leave BeSad alone!
"No one wants you around!" she exclaimed! "Bad dog! Go home!"
Any friendship startled the sharp-ended beast,
such emotion bewildering, only on tears did it feast.
"Very well, you Noobs! I will retreat to the Furious lair!
None question my salt, all agree with me there!"
Her monster vanquished, our knight turned to depart,
but paused, took stock, and had words to impart:
"You Cookies, and Crit-ers, and Legions take heart;
I won't take any crap from these whiny old farts!"
So the beleaguered BeSad rejoiced, truest nobility found.
"Om nom nom!" Called Ebola, his inspiration profound!
"Well put, fine friend," Modi slurred, "I have a buzz I'd hate to lose,
but with all that bullshit settled, I can go get more booze!"
"Three cheers for Ophelia," cried Caileena, "gallant defender of fun!
Now when we queue up for games, we’ll no longer be shunned!”
But not all was well. Please, dear readers, don’t weep.
It was a tired Juicy, yet again, fast asleep.
Composed by UndoutedlyMrJ the Pedantic
Edited & Modified by Caileena the Indomitable
