#on quotes

[nociceptive-signal]

"should intermitted vengeance arm again his red right hand to plague us?"

-paradise lost

at what point is retaliation not worth it?

at what point is confrontation not worth it?

at what point is letting yourself and your feelings be known not worth it?

at what point is letting yourself feel not worth it?

at what point is having a relationship not worth it?

at what point is having friends not worth it?

at what point is being alive not worth it?

have you reached that yet?

[nociceptive-signal]

"how frozen i became, and powerless, then"

what dante wrote about was seeing satan

but i've a different metaphor in mind

a metaphor in the experience of mankind

how frozen i became when i saw her come

to my fears, i'd always succumb

if she ever got too close, finished her approach

i'd start to run away

how frozen i became, how powerless then,

when i was confronted with a situation i can't control

one that terrifies me so, one that i have to face alone

which preys on the anxiety to which i'm prone

how frozen i became, and powerless then,

facing my sins, for which i must atone

they grew louder and louder within my ears

amplified by the voices of my peers

how frozen i became, and powerless, then

when i first learned the reality of death

something i couldn't stop,

something that, to prevent, i'm useless

how frozen i became, and powerless then,

facing something in my past

yet in the present, and the future

without a suture, i probably wouldn't last

how frozen i became, and powerless then,

depressants scare the shit out of me

i wanted to run away, and i still do

but for my loved ones i stay

how frozen i became, and powerless, then

when the weight of an ocean stood upon me

couldn't lift a limb, couldn't get out of bed

too depressed to be free

dante was a good writer, to be sure

or at least i think he was

but to me, he lacked a vital lesson

his imagination limited in scope

why write about nine circles of hell,

when the earth is already hell by design?

[nociceptive-signal]

i was shaking, crying, i didn't want to go

it hurt me, just the thought of it

things you'll never know

i was in anguish before and during

though it turned out alright

i wish you knew how bad i was hurting

i wish i could bring it to light

i wish you could see the effort i put in

i did my best to calm myself down

again and again and again

that brings me to where i am now, things went mostly okay

though i cried and almost cried and begged for an end

what a fucking day

god, i'm such a pathetic sight

if you're not apathetic, you should be

there's quite a few words to describe me

i'm a stagnant, pungent pool of ill kept water

full of algae and things that keep you up at night

i'm a disgusting wretch,

the first and last regret

i'm an ocean of blood, a gash in reality

a sense of wrongness pervades all who come near

i'm a crashing tsunami, full of bodies

ending what you hold dear

truth is, i'm none of these things yet all of them

i feel disgusting all the same

my biggest fear, being a drain

on you, your feelings, your fun, your reign

"how frozen i became and powerless then, ask it not, reader, for i write it not, because all language would be insufficient"

-dante's inferno, canto 34

[nociceptive-signal]

it's up to me now

to figure this out

to make myself happy

to make myself loved

can't always rely on others

to do such things

sometimes they can't be

my savior

i'm so fucking scared

i'm damn near terrified

of such a little thing

i want to self isolate

"think for yourself now, if you have any wit,

what I became, being deprived of life and death."

dante's inferno, canto 34

[hooliganstreetjournal]

On Quotes

I thought about compiling my favorite quotes.  It was one of those thoughts that hits you in the side of the head like a foul ball into the nacho line.  The pool of quotes is infinite.  Every second, more quotes are born than anyone could ever sort through.  This spectacular idea got very overwhelming.  As quickly as it arrived, I was over it.  

“That’s a stupid fucking idea” -myself to myself.

What was I going to do, make a booklet and keep it under my pillow?  Read myself sweet, inspiring little nuggets before bed each night?  Maybe I’d scribble them in my pathetic penmanship and pin them into a cork-board.  A glorious wall of motivating quotes.  I could fold them before I pinned them up.  That way I could unravel them like prophetic Asian cookies without the calories or MSG.  It could be a morning ritual.  Bukowski, Hunter S. Thompson, Martin Luther King Jr., Bob Marley, A.C. Slater.  No limit to this project.  I would be the subjective judge jury and Post-It calligrapher.  Deciding which quotes are worthy and which are not.  

It wouldn’t work.  It couldn’t work.  My mind doesn’t work in a linear fashion.  It’s attention deficit and pinball and aggravation.  All I have to do is look back at quotes I posted in the past.  The content varies wildly.  Each line subjective and stained with the stink of whatever mood I happened to be in at the time.  No theme.  No obvious value structure.  If I was broken hearted, the quotes were gloomy and pathetic.  There were angry song lyrics.  Intellectual tidbits that I always almost understood.

The biggest pitfall of my brilliant idea was the fact that a quote might be life altering on Monday.  It might be so insightful and in tune with the current state of the world.  And on Tuesday — that same quote might be a grammatically incorrect rambling from a mediocre Bon Jovi song.

There are plenty of powerful quotes.  So powerful that girls have them tattooed onto their ribcage.  Boys prefer more public real estate, chest and forearms.  There might be more to that.  Maybe the placement of a quote tattoo is directly related to the content of the quote.  Someone needs to do a study on this.  Bible quote tattoos are done primarily on the back.  That way you aren’t constantly confronted with them, but can constantly be preaching to the person behind you.  Love quotes go on the ribcage, close to the heart.  Angry quotes on the knuckles, knees, shins.  Simple, standard quotes of five or less syllables on the outside of the wrist or around the ankle.  Neck tattoos aren’t generally quotes, but I’m sure that region has a genre as well.

The same way your tattooed skin will eventually sag and wrinkle, perspectives, mindsets, beliefs — it all changes.  That’s why quotes are used like emojis.  How do I feel now?  Empowered, rebellious…go with something by Rosa Parks or Che Guevara.   Sad?  Use song lyrics.  Just know that tomorrow that sentence might be greatly depreciated.  It won’t lose all of its punch, but it won’t be as precise and powerful as it was last year, when you found it at sunset, scratched into the back of a public bus seat.

Don’t get me wrong.  I like quotes as much as the next guy.  (None with enough confidence to brand myself with.)  Some quotes obviously transcend time and mood.  They work in any weather.  They can be translated into dozens of languages and still hold their voltage.  They can shift the course of peoples lives.

Imagine that.  Writing some series of words, in a journal, in a book, in a bathroom stall, and having those words jolt someone into action.  Or even inaction.  Maybe it only created a minor spark, an idea.  It made some doofus consider, briefly, building a collection of quotes.

[vesania]

I like us better when we’re wasted.

[iraqwarquotes-blog]

"You're Putting Words in my Mouth"

The most difficult thing, I think, in an information internet age is to decide if what we are reading is true or if what we are reading is a fabrication, or simply untrue. As users of the internet, we have developed a skill set that allows us to detect when something is satirical, false, or fabricated in order to save us the embarrassment of misappropriating an article that, as it turns out, was written by the Onion. This generation of people is more attuned at identifying satire than any other, simply because of its ubiquity on the internet, and the potential for visible, public misinterpretation in front of our peers is so high.  And yet, in spite of this, it is still sometimes so impossibly challenging to decide what is real and what is not. Below, there are 25 quotes. Some of them, a random assortment of them, are not real. They are fabrications attributed to figures, both real and fantasy. When I wrote many of them, weeks ago, I thought I was being clever. And now, as I look back on them, even I can no longer remember which are real and which are not - there truly are a few that I myself cannot remember writing, and therefore am not sure if they're real or not. Isn't that unsettling? Many of these quotes will seem obvious to you - either obviously true or obviously false - but please keep in mind that if the author of those that are fake cannot remember which are which, that perhaps your assumption is incorrect. You might ask yourself, then, how it's possible that somebody could say something so incorrigible, incorrect or stupid - but you would be amazed by what we are capable of as humans, I think. 

George W. Bush and the buffoonery surrounding his presidency is almost more famous for the presence of completely idiotic quotes than it is for the action it took on things such as the war on terror, the economy and social policy. It was so, so easy to manipulate certain things to make them sound completely real, when in fact they were false. The reverse is also true. I imagine, dear reader, that you will give me credit for idiocy that was actually spoken aloud by the person quoted. I think that's pretty fucking funny. And equally as tragic.

It is impossible to examine the state of journalism during the immediate aftermath of the outset of the Iraq War without first understanding what was being said about the war and its participants at the time. During the initial outset of the war, patriotism was the prescribed state of mind, and dissenting opinions were brushed off, obliterated or laughed at openly. As such, much of what was said surrounding the war at the time looks ridiculous to us in hindsight, and it is important to note the critical aspect that the ephemeral nature of the News and opinion plays in the perception of events, both current and historical. 

I think it is also critical, while we are specifically discussing how it is possible to misinterpret information, utilizing the rest of this blog as an example, that we discuss how important the contextualization and presentation of information is to its seeming validity. 

The presentation of information, in any context or form, is no different from a performance. For example, in an academic essay (which this is decidedly not), there is a form you must stick to, a typographical voice that you must utilize and in order for your essay to succeed, it must present its information in a way that is meaningful and resonant. This is no different from stepping out onto a stage and performing a piece of theatre - form, voice, quality, meaningfulness and efficacy all are critical in order to engage your audience. The thesis, therefore, is that performing journalism through variable new media forms has become common practice. It is not about what information is most accurate (hundred-page statistical reports are not as widely read as newspapers, unfortunately), but about which information is made most engaging and accessible to its audience via performance. 

During the Iraq War, it was less about what was accurate information (the media circus surrounding the whole Weapons of Mass Destruction fiasco is evident of this) and more about what information rang in the ears of the audience in a pervading and lasting way. Especially towards the outset, the Iraq War was literally all that was being discussed in the news on a world-wide scale, and speculation and suspicion rang truer than what was actually happening. By examining this hysteria, speculation and fabrication during this time period, and in the format I chose to do so, we can quite clearly see how truly the dissemination of information became more a performance than a scientific practice. 

If I was to state, in plain text, "Weapons of Mass Destruction were found in Iraq today" most, if not every single person, would presume some kind of sarcasm, irony or fabrication was at play. However, if I was to portray it in the following format, it takes on new meaning: "Weapons of Mass Destruction were found in Iraq Today" - Barack Obama

It is demonstrable that not only is the form or journalism key, but so is the character. If you peruse my blog and remove all of the sources and quotation marks, it immediately loses its efficacy. However, by attributing these statements to people, people who we all recognize as characters in the Iraq War debacle, it appears much more valid. Without actually reading what has been said, or without the careful examination of these statements individually, one could very easily presume this blog was not so much parody as it was real. Without me saying this all, the ignorant could easily misinterpret something wildly untrue as factual. This is all because, even when the words were not theirs, the fact that a believable character was established through the form is enough to allow the audience, or you in this case, to buy in. 

The quote, therefore, becomes an incredibly powerful way to portray information, and we never consider the potentiality for misappropriation of them. How many people can truly say they aren't guilty of taking a quote or a source out of context in order to make their point, whether in conversation or in an academic paper? How many people are not guilty of exaggerating something they heard a person say for effect? And yet, so often, presume that when a person is parroting another that is must be accurate. One of the most common things said during arguments regarding a breakdown in communication is "You're putting words in my mouth." To be misquoted or misinterpreted is thought of as a breach to our very sense of individuality, as we are being forced to have said something without our consent. It is perceived almost as thought-crime. And so we presume that when somebody uses the words of another that they are being truthful in their intention and meanings, because to be otherwise would not only be seen as an attack to us as the audience, but to the person whose words are being misused. 

Now that I have posted this, go back and read the quotes that I have posted, armed with the information that lying among them are red herrings. And I have made it a personal mission of mine to hide the obvious among the ridiculous, so it becomes almost impossible to tell. And before you make a judgement on what is in front of you, I want you to consider that these are quotes that are taken out of context, in many cases over 10 years after they have been said. It becomes virtually impossible to know, then, what has actually been said aloud, and what hasn't. I think that says something about the way we say things. It should definitely say something about how we think about what is being said.

Hell, even I could be wrong about what is real and what isn't - after all, I got all of these from around the internet. Who's to say I'm not the only person playing a bit of a prank on our societal sensibilities of truth.

Good luck, at any rate.