#oooo f

[volatilejaws]

i cannot stress how shaky ( at best ) paul’s relationship is with vampires. out of all the twilight muses that i have roleplayed, past & present, he is the one who has an open opinion on his distaste for them.

while some of this is based on genetics ( since the purpose of a shapeshifter is to literally kill vampires), a lot of this stems from personal issues revolving around their existence ( and by their, i refer to the cullens, obviously. ) paul may enjoy the perks of being a shapeshifter, but it doesn’t take away the fact from him that part of his normalcy was taken away - and even though shape shifters technically have the ability to stop phasing and continue to grow old, it’s really hard for paul in particular, especially since he has so many episodes.

paul never got involved with any of the fights for the cullens, or bella’s sake. it was all to protect the people, and his pack. his involvement during eclipse & breaking dawn was solely to protect the inhabitants of forks. ( sorry bella & cullens that just how it be. ) he has a lot of frustration vented out to bella because a LOT of this shit would have happened if she hadn’t gotten involved with edward in the first place. ( and he’ll openly tell her that.)

i’m not saying it’s NOT possible to develop a friendly-ish relationship with paul, because it isn’t! canonically he & emmett have changed from a hostile to a mutual understanding relationship. but just know that if you have a vampire muse, and paul acts out, it’s because of him and his complicated relationship with the species as a whole.

[ninjaliike]

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙱𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙱𝙴 𝙻𝙾𝚅𝙴𝙳?

touch me with tender truth. you crave being known and held. you just want the warmth and pressure of another body against your own. sometimes, late at night when you're alone in your bed, your skin aches with the lack of touch. you've tried touching yourself, and it isn't the same. one time someone gripped your shoulder and squeezed it in passing, and you thought about it for weeks after - the ghost pressure of their hand lingering. don't you deserve it? consistent physical love and caring? i think so, i think you do. but i also have to ask - do you fear it even as you want? after all, if you get it then it might also be taken away. i hope that if you fear it, you push through past that fear. that you ask for the touch you desire and deserve. i hope that you get touched with love and kindness, wrapped up in warm arms and rocked from side to side until the tension and pain falls away layer by layer and only you are left.

tagged by: stole this from the dash! tagging: @helbanish / @dunneham . @goofily . @shezoomer . @sythegun . @frederickjones . @shel0st . @heruns & you!