Iman, Faith, Belief
Ramadhan Kareem
Alhamdulillahirrabilalamin, am so blessed to meet this holy month again since I heard some of my family and friend’s relatives couldn’t make it :(
I rushed on my flight back to Jogja to have first Shalat Tarawih with my fams in this Ramadhan, but turned out I got my period the next morning so ... Yes, I am coming back from Bandung !!! I officially ended my internship up in Biofarma Bandung, been 2 weeks actually (gonna post about my fabulous once lifetime experience there at the best squad Pathology and Toxicology, especially Safety Test and Abnormal Toxicity Section, yeay!)
I miss myself writing down a couple or more paragraph just about what I’ve learned that days, post a whatever-I-love-to-take kind of picture that could help my hypothalamus’s work one day, or simply a song either video I’ve been currently listening to, silly chit chat etc. These pages of list-to-do wins my longing yet until one of my fickle screensaver picture (hanging above) interest me by depicts yesterday deep talk with Mom about Iman, faith, belief towards My Greatest of All, Our Holy God, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala.
What is Iman? What you’ve done with it? How Iman impacts your life? Why Iman important to you? Are you okay if you loose your Iman? Whom your Iman refers to? When is you feel that your Iman gradually faded? or suddenly on top of everything?
I tried to answer, just one by one, by what I know right now and I feel lack, less, empty, hollow. As I know, we are all know, the brief but comprehensive meaning of Iman is justify and warrant it in your heart, pronounced orally and practiced with deeds. Then, is it enough just to know the meaning? I was confidently already understand this lesson called Iman, but again, yesterday afternoon talk with Mom just washed it away. Like I never been understanding it both literally and figuratively, or I once did but now I’m getting withered, easily tumble down.
You can’t score anyone’s Iman because it’s totally not our privilege but Him. To add another but, I’ll frankly said you can feel it your own when your Iman starts dwindle and diminish. Because, somehow, your words and actions represent your Iman. Let’s try to communicate to your own heart. Am I already have Iman in my heart? Is everything I said already good ones? Is everything I do already resembles kindness? Is that all I do already corresponding to my Iman? to my faith? to my belief? to Islam has taught? Is that all I did because I’m simply happy and heartfelt or some of them have another reason behind? No, no am not judging, because I can’t and don’t deserve to, am just trying to be honest to my own heart, my own self, and you should try that too because you’re the one yourself can trust to do.
After those short (or maybe took longer) contemplation, like I did, you can segmenting at which point are you now? Nobody’s perfect, in Iman indeed since we’re all just ordinary human but please keep in mind that we can endeavor and attempt to get close to it. I may not that close, but I need to keep progressing while stabilizing my state. And this gonna be your ‘essential need’ if only you understand how Iman’s importance towards your life, both dunya and akhirat, and that’s the base thing to be discovered and answered by your own, thing I still not clearly hold onto it yet.
Thus, my Mom keep reminds me, refresh me, hold me tight when I still couldn’t find it and see it my my own eyes, just because she loves me. Once my Mom said that she afraid couldn’t make it for my entire life, for her chidren’s entire life (really, this one makes me miserable, sorrowful).
Thus, my Mom never tired of nourishing my Iman by inviting me to shalat in and better in time, attend Islam lesson society, read Quran constantly, read light book about Iman and grateful, do good, speak wise, always be honest to myself to let Allah knows my story although He already is in every dua. So that when am far or we’re apart, I know how to gain my Iman back, or even better can be like Mom to my circle.
In the end, Iman is about communication, my Mom just pretty well said. Keep in touch to your God so you can always have Iman, have faith and believe.
In the end, your surroundings are the components to your blossom flower heart of Iman. I have my surrounding, I need to keep my already good established circle and add more.
In the end, I hope I can be one of somebody’s surrounding either as a water, sunshine, shadow, land to blossom their flower of Iman or just the same like them to be together ceaselessly supporting each other in improving our Iman. Insha Allah Amin :)
Ramadhan is always be splendid and remarkable month to start a good change, let’s start while it last, while we last :)
p.s. Most of the content are from my Mom, I’m just reciting her words :’’ despite all of that, sharing is caring right?
p.s.s Don’t forget to have Dhuha! and wish me luck on my third trial on same subject exam this noon, Tee-Hee!