2 AM.
@grimoircs / jaekyu & kiwon, atlas dorm
the concert runs are finished, and there’s comeback prep on the horizon. it’s late, but does it matter? everything blurs together anyway. time, mostly. night and day and the hours caught up in between. any moment could be stolen into sleep, and it seems like there’s no reserved point in time for that anymore. so it’s two in the morning, but what difference does it make? his body can’t tell anymore.
that and he’s hungry. sits crosslegged on an oversized couch, his eyes staring a bit blankly at his phone screen. watches a tiny mini bike slowly roll it’s way toward the building. there’s a promise of chicken tied to that mini bike. there’s food in the fridge. healthy food that he should be eating. dietitian approved food. but jaekyu doesn’t really want it. he wants things he shouldn’t have.
always.
it’s a craving, that’s what he’ll say if someone walks in and sees him. but it goes beyond that. an act of rebellion, acting out. pushing limits that are meant to be solid. he hates feeling boxed in, and with their growing popularity and such a focused spotlight, that’s what it feels like.
always.
funny, considering how much they’d all hoped for this sort of thing back when they were nobodies. back when they could nearly recognize all the fans that showed up to their fansigns. sometimes jaekyu feels ungrateful. sometimes he feels choked with anxiety. he doesn’t really show it. just laughs a bit harder, digs into yohan in their tom and jerry routine, until that sometimes winds around and people start to question whether they really like each other. everything’s examined under a microscope.
always.
he finally unfolds himself from the couch when the food’s here, pulls open the door and accepts the bag, mask in place. just in case. yank it off and unpacks everything on the living room floor to binge eat. is mid-bite when someone else wanders out to join him. kiwon, and jaekyu waves him over like an offering. holds out another piece of chicken for him, caught between chopsticks. “i won’t tell if you don’t.” he says after he swallows.