DAVE: no hold up that makes no fuckin sense i gotta rewind back to the beginning
KARKAT: ARE YOU GONNA KEEP MUMBLING TO YOURSELF OR CAN--
DAVE: oh shit sorry what
DAVE: i was just thinking through some really convoluted metaphorical horseshit
KARKAT: YEAH THAT WAS PRETTY FUCKING EVIDENT.
DAVE: my b bro
DAVE: what were you saying
KARKAT: I WAS SAYING I THOUGHT WE MIGHT GO, I DUNNO, ANYWHERE ELSE ON THE ENTIRE SHIP WHILE THE CLOTHES WERE WASHING.
KARKAT: SEEING AS THIS DECREPIT MACHINE WE WERE SO BLESSEDLY PROVIDED WITH MAKES A WHIRRING SOUND SO PANCHAFINGLY ARHYTHMIC THAT IT THREATENS TO ERADICATE THE ENTIRE CONCEPT OF TEMPO FROM THE UNIVERSE.
KARKAT: AND YET SOMEHOW BASICALLY ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED SINCE WE STARTED THE LOAD IS THAT YOU’VE BEEN USING IT AS A FUCKED UP BEAT TO WHISPER TO YOURSELF ABOUT FLOWERS TO.
KARKAT: AT THIS POINT I'M EITHER GOING TO NEED YOU TO SPEAK UP OR FOLLOW ME THE FUCK ON OUT OF HERE, BECAUSE THIS IS EXCRUCIATING.
DAVE: ok fine ill do the first one
KARKAT: GREAT. TURN UP THE FLOWER TALK VOLUME.
DAVE: so uh
DAVE: kanaya was telling me this kids story the other day about this dude who didnt cherish a flower enough until it peaced out to do flower stuff idk its not pertinent to the story
DAVE: except the flower was a person
DAVE: because it was a metaphor
KARKAT: YEAH LIKE YOU SAID,
DAVE: really convoluted metaphorical horseshit
KARKAT: REALLY CONVOLUTED METAPHORICAL HORSESHIT.
DAVE: yeah
DAVE: anyway what goes down in the story is that once the flower lady is out of the picture
DAVE: the main character goes around making all these connections between her and everything else in the universe until every damn thing feels like a symbol for how much he fucked up and how much he will never see her again
KARKAT: THIS SEEMS PRETTY FUCKING INTENSE FOR A KID'S STORY
DAVE: yea thats pretty much what i said
DAVE: but i guess its not so much what the story was technically textually about but more like the version of it kanaya internalized and then told me when we were talkin about how she misses rose
DAVE: so like now im taking the story she told me she was projecting her feelings onto and projecting my feelings on top of that
DAVE: this is just one big game of emotional projection telephone so feel free to go paraphrase it to roxy later and make it about whatever fuckin thing youre currently missing
KARKAT: YOUR ABILITY TO GET TO THE POINT
DAVE: gotem
DAVE: anyway you’re not gonna have to miss that skill of mine for long
DAVE: get ready for this shit because i am about to slap you with the point so hard youll fall ass first into the washer
DAVE: just scrambling around in there getting all sudsy
DAVE: but your brain is gonna be so blasted from the mindfreak of a point im about to make that there wont be anything left to clean
DAVE: are you ready
DAVE: karkat you havent made any kind of comment about how youre ready in a few seconds so
KARKAT: YEAH DAVE DROP THIS FUCKING BOMB ON ME.
DAVE: ok thanks
DAVE: so its genuinely cool that kanaya can go around creating meaning that may or may not be actually present in every little thing
DAVE: connecting every feeling she has to the idea of her wife existing out there
DAVE: so i told her she should keep that shit up
DAVE: but im having the opposite issue where im struggling to find anything to be that kind of tether because every single thing i could possibly consider about what it is were doing just reminds me of yet another thing to be afraid about
DAVE: so if you were looking for a more concentrated point
DAVE: the real point thats that point simmered in its own juices into a perfect point reduction
DAVE: here it is
DAVE: everything fuckin sucks huge cosmic donkey sack and im terrified
KARKAT: OK, SO I FEEL LIKE YOU SKIPPED A COUPLE NECESSARY STEPS IN YOUR POINT CLARIFICATION PROCESS.
KARKAT: I’M GOING TO RESIST THE URGE TO CONTINUE YOUR REDUCTION METAPHOR EVEN THOUGH I HAVE SOME INARGUABLY GOOD SHIT LINED UP FOR IT BECAUSE I’M AFRAID OF US GETTING TOO FAR OFF TRACK, HERE.
DAVE: ok but were you going with sweet or savory please give me that much at least
KARKAT: YEAH IT WAS GOING TO BE SUNDAE-BASED.
DAVE: nice
KARKAT: YEAH.
KARKAT: DO YOU WANNA WATCH MORE GBBO AFTER THIS?
DAVE: absolutely
KARKAT: GREAT. ANYWAY, LIKE I WAS SAYING, FOR THE LOVE OF SWEET HUMAN CHRIST, PLEASE BACK UP TO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU’RE ACTUALLY SCARED OF.
KARKAT: ALSO COME HERE, IDIOT.
DAVE: ok yeah this is a better position to unleash all my inner fears n anxieties from
DAVE: so uh
DAVE: like i said i talked to kan about it some
DAVE: and its not like weve not talked about it either but i dunno
DAVE: those times its like my mouth was saying words about the situation wherein our friends are AWOL and maybe dead but my brain wasnt fully letting me experience the emotion that goes along with them
DAVE: man its like i cant even start genuinely thinking about how afraid i actually am for rose and john without my brain flippin its wad and whiting out
DAVE: like haha fuck i hope theyre ok
DAVE: now i better make a fuckin joke before i succumb to the gaping mouth of despair waiting for me to fall in it as soon as i look down and acknowledge that its there ogling how juicy my ass looks as it trembles with terror
DAVE: and then if i think about either of them then its only a matter of time til i have to think about dirk too
DAVE: its an if you give a mouse a cookie situation but instead of more snacks its just another layer of fear about my loved ones
DAVE: and with dirk its
DAVE: whew
DAVE: i guess im just fucked up about how to worry about dirk and be angry at him at the same time
DAVE: because if i get as unholy pissed at him as i sometimes wanna be i also gotta admit to myself that maybe i coulda done something different there
DAVE: like if wed kept up better maybe there woulda been a point along the line where i could have said the right thing somehow and hed idk
DAVE: not stolen rose away on some nightmare family trip
DAVE: forcing us to accept the fact that hes our enemy now and chase after him for an unreasonably indeterminate number of years
DAVE: also like
DAVE: and this by the way adds a whole other layer of guilt on there that i dont really know how to fuckin reckon with but
DAVE: even with all the shit hes pulled and the fact that we are more or less heading toward having to take him down
DAVE: whatever that is gonna mean and whether or not he planned it like that
DAVE: i just
DAVE: me and him had come so far with each other and it was really cool for a while to have him and i
DAVE: ugh
DAVE: i dont WANT to hate him
KARKAT: IS THAT ALL? I’M POISED ON THE PRECIPICE OF REASSURANCE WITH MY COUNTER-RANT LOCKED AND LOADED BUT IT FEELS LIKE YOU’VE GOT MORE SHIT YOU’RE HOLDING BACK ON.
DAVE: yeah i got another thing
KARKAT: WELL THEN QUIT FUCKING PICKING AT THE SEAM ON MY SHORTS AND SPIT IT OUT. THEY'RE BARELY HANGING ON TO THE DEFINITION OF "SHORTS" AS IT IS.
DAVE: ok fuck its just
DAVE: ...
DAVE: the part i mentioned before about how we really have no goddamn clue how long this trip is even gonna take
DAVE: i cant help but feel like its barely getting revved up
DAVE: and for me and roxy and jade and callie and kan thats normal shit at best and boring at worst but we all have our immortality to thank for that
DAVE: we can just dick around in space for near-eternity waiting to catch up to our friends who may or may not be our enemies now and itll be fine
DAVE: i mean no itll be categorically miserable
DAVE: but well survive it
KARKAT: HOLD THE FUCK ON.
DAVE: but you
KARKAT: DAVE.
DAVE: no lemme say this
DAVE: we dont talk about it much and i got shit to say about it
DAVE: its not like i never thought about how youre mortal before but i just thought wed be able to figure it out before it mattered
DAVE: come up with some kind of plan
DAVE: i was just distracted being happy with you i fucking guess and so i didnt think up a way to fix it
DAVE: and now thanks to dirk we have to work it out right the fuck now
DAVE: because i cant spend this trip just sitting around watching you get old and die
