Elizabeth Olsen was annoying. Beyond annoying. She was a mess and a pain in the ass and so hard to calculate and pin-point where her train of thought resided at any given moment. On the other hand, she was beautiful and down-to-earth and hilarious and kind and everything good about the world. And...her text messages were giving Tom major whiplash. Spending nine days in radio silence was harder on the Brit than he realized, being the first to crack and check in with her. The conversation he initiated in his kitchen completely backfired and nearly ruined their friendship as a whole, to the point to where he wasn’t sure how or why it went as far as it did. Of course, to make matters even worse, he had to kiss her. Why? He didn’t know. Because she was working herself up and he didn’t know how else to get her to surrender? Because he wanted to?
Tom quickly finished the glass of wine he poured before heading up the stairs to dress himself in something other than sweat shorts and an old blue t-shirt he’d notably worn to hell and back. Tom dressed into a newer pair of black joggers and a black t-shirt that his stylist picked up for him, lecturing him that he couldn’t wear the same clothes out and about for five years, especially when he was an a-list actor. Not that Tom gave a shit at all. He stole from his character wardrobes and his favorite pair of shoes were a pair of boots he had picked up while filming I Saw The Light with Lizzie years ago.
It was so late in the evening, Tom went as far to pack a quick overnight bag just in case he didn’t make it home and a few of Bobby’s things, hoping she wouldn’t mind him coming over with him. He led him out to the car and got him settled in before sending an on the way text and heading out. Driving at any time of the night was peaceful to Tom, it gave him clarity, especially with his best friend in the passenger seat. As soon as the two arrived, Tom let the dog out of the vehicle, walking behind him as he ran towards the door at the speed of light. He sighed deeply before knocking on the door and resting in the doorframe as he waited for Lizzie to answer. @lizzieolxen
He had been up since 4 o’clock that morning; not because he needed to be, but because he knew that sleeping would make time go quicker and he needed to savour it- he needed to savour those two hours before he had to get up and go to the hospital to check himself in for his surgery. An invasive procedure that would expose his brain in the hopes of removing the tumour that had him practically held at gunpoint. Sebastian barely slept the night before, instead, he just watched Blaine sleep; this surgery could change everything and it wasn’t all positive. Things could go wrong and he could never be the same again; Sebastian Smythe could stop being Sebastian Smythe- his personality could be altered, he could be left with brain damage which could paralyze him, leave him with epilepsy or could put him in a vegetative state. His neurologist said it was normal to suffer from depression or anxiety after such major surgery, but he didn’t want to imagine himself in a state of helplessness or fear; he didn’t want to picture Blaine being left to possibly pick up the pieces for the remainder of his life. He didn’t want to be a burden and he was determined to make sure his boyfriend would never be stuck with that burden.
His mind was running wild and all he could do was watch his boyfriend sleep, wanting to just close his eyes only to reopen them again to see all of this had been some terrifying dream. But that wasn’t going to happen and Sebastian knew that, so instead of just lying in bed staring hopelessly at the love of his life, the aspiring dancer pulled himself out of bed and went into the bathroom; gently shutting the door behind him and locking it as he turned the shower on, stripping out of his vest and sweatpants before climbing into the tup. He just stood under the showerhead with his eyes closed as his head was leaned back; the water soothingly hitting his face as he took a deep breath and released it as he lifted his head upright and opened his eyes; his hands running over his shaved head as he bit down on his bottom lip and stared at the bathroom wall. This was his only escape from his thoughts, his only escape from reality, even if it was only for a short amount of time.
After his shower, Sebastian dried himself off, doused his body in cologne and got dressed, stting down on the floor as he opened his hospital bag and packed his childhood teddy bear into it, along with his phone charger and his favorite pair of pastel blue bed socks that Blaine had got him for Christmas during his Junior Year at Dalton, the year he had returned to Ohio after having to move back to Paris before starting his Freshman Year; he had been so happy to reunite with Blaine, it was one of the greatest years of his life. Who would’ve thought almost three years later he and Blaine would be in a serious relationship together, living together and would now be facing one of the hardest obsticles of their lives together. He sighed as he reminisced happier times with his boyfriend, biting down on his bottom lip as he opened the bottom drawer of his dresser and pulled out a small black box; looking back at his boyfriend who was still fast asleep before turning back to look at the object in his hand, stuffing it into his hospital bag before zipping it up and standing up; making his side of the bed before carrying his hospital bag out to the living room, setting it down near the front door and sitting on the couch.
Sebastian looked up at the clock and sighed; only one hour left before Blaine would be getting ready to go to the hospital with him; only one more hour left before Sebastian would be faced with his biggest nightmare.
June: couldn't help but smile a little as she grabbed her phone and keys. It was nice to know some people actually enjoyed her company, especially if she did the same. Cam was one of those people she had enjoyed being with so it was no surprise she was happily taking him up on his offer to come over and spend some time. Of course she knew how this would end or at least she assumed it. And to be honest she wouldn't mind it one single bit. The girl quickly checked if she could find Quinn just to tell her she would go out, but she couldn't so she shrugged it off and just left her a note, before leaving. She still remembered the way to his place and luckily it wasn't all that far. It only took her a couple of minutes and as she arrived the girl knocked at his door waiting for him to answer it.
What: Margaret shows Carter her home town and special spot of here where they share their first kiss.
Where: Hotel Room
When: March 29th
Warnings: None
Word Count: 5,003
@cordellacarter
Margaret felt like she was in on cloud nine, getting to spend all day with Carter combined with their conversation the other night. The smile on her lips would not falter, even as she leaned down to get a sip of her milkshake. After a moment she glanced up at him, “So is this everything you have dreamed and more?” She asked before sitting back up, “The amount of times I would come here to edit photos and draw is countless.” Margaret reminisced as she looked around the diner. “It hasn’t changed much at all...I mean the cameras weren’t here but everything else is the same.” She teased, it was the best way for her to deal with them always seeming to be right over her shoulder.
After their very flirtatious conversation, Carter was a little worried that things between them would be awkward but things were probably better than ever. Though that very fact terrified him, it also made him feel a little excited about the what the future had in store for them. He’d not long finished up his cheese fries, not just working on the rest of his milkshake. “Absolutely,” He said, a grin unable to be washed from his face. Glancing around the old diner, the red head couldn’t help but picture a young Margaret working away at one of the booths and he bit at his lip gently to stop himself from smiling even wider. “Are you sure the cameras weren’t here? I mean they’re so subtle you probably wouldn’t have noticed.” The boy joked.
Her eyes couldn't help but move to linger on his lips. And maybe she wasn't doing a good job hiding it, but she wasn't even she if she wanted to. When Margaret saw him bite his lip her own smile grew, if that was even possible. Her foot moved and brushed against his. Unintentional at first, but once she got the contact she couldn't help but take advantage of it. A chuckle escaped her lips as she shook her head, her face brightening up all over again. "You know that is a very good point. I mean with all this big equipment, it is totally possible to overlook it." Her eyes glanced over when she felt the stares then moved her eyes back to meet his, "Who knows my whole life could have been the Truman Show."
The moment Margaret’s eyes came into contact with his lips, his stomach couldn’t stop churning, it took everything in him not to let his wander down to hers. “Well - I for one would’ve definitely tuned into every episode.” He admitted, slightly shaking his head. He was somewhat getting used to his entire life being public knowledge so the cameras weren’t bothering him all that much. His infamous smirk growing on his features as the girls foot brushed against his continuously. “So Miss. Pierce - where to next on this wonderful hometown tour?”
"Hmm..." Margaret hummed after pushing her milkshake to the sight and letting her arms sit on the table so she could lean forward, ever so slightly. The moment she saw his smirk she swore she could have melted into a puddle right then and there, and it was probably obvious on her face as well. "Well there are so many options, you already got to see all my amazing photos and modeling skills." She teased before continuing. "There is my old school, the library, and there is also this little spot that I would always sneak away to when I was in school. It has an amazing view."
Carter couldn’t keep his eyes off the girl at the best of times, but today? It was like his eyes were glued to her and he didn’t care how obvious it seemed. “You are quite the model, those prom pics really were somethin” The smirk grew a little bigger. Taking a moment to think over the options Margaret had given, he hummed softly to himself. “My vote is on the view.” He grabbed his phone from the table and slipped it into the pocket of his jeans before rising to his feet.
"You think so? And to think I had no idea that I would actually model at some point. It was my training." Margaret had a proud smile grow on her lips. "Going and picking yourself, Cater? Typical." She teased and even threw a wink in his direction, was this a big step of confidence? Yes, but she was at the point where she felt like if she didn't try she might never know. And so far things were going so well so there was no reason to stop now. "But good choice, it is one of a kind and actually not that far from here." Margaret grabbed her phone and camera bag that she always had with her. Not anticipating how close she would be to him once she stood up, her eyes moved up to meet his. "If you don't mind walking." She asked softly.
Carter rolled his eyes playfully, usually he was the one so confident with flirting but Margaret had him feeling way out of his depths. Normally he would’ve had a cheeky retort to snap back, but his mind was all over the place in the best possible way. “Sounds great.” He slipped out of the booth, waiting for the blonde before making his way to the exit and holding the door for her. “Course not - not with good company anyway,” he smiled contently. “Lead the way.”
When he rolled his eyes she couldn't help but let out a laugh, "Oh? Am I taking the job of causing the eye rolling?" She asked as she followed him out of the diner, thanking him when he held the door open for her. "You keep flattering me, CC. I don't know if I can handle it." Margaret teased nudging his shoulders as they started to walk down the side walk, not being able to help but want to stay close to him. "Hopefully my spot didn't get too popular, because it use to be one of the few secluded areas in the city."
As the two walked out of the diner and along the sidewalk, an overbearing urge to reach out and touch the girl overwhelmed him. Whether it be his hand in hers or his arm wrapping around her shoulders, he just craved the feeling of her being closer. Fighting himself internally he just kept his body close to hers, a laugh escaping his lips as Margaret nudged him. “Stop making it so easy to flatter you,” he teased back. “Well I guess that all depends on how many people you brought back here back in the day.” He joked, nudging her back gently with a chuckle before glancing over at her for a moment then back out to the direction they were heading.
"It's not my fault that your amazing charm is just rubbing off on me." Her own laugh leaving her lips, before continuing. "It am not responsible for anything." She shrugged innocently, but the smirk on her face said otherwise. When he nudged her back her smile grew and without even thinking she looped her arm through his. "Oh goodness I couldn't even count on my fingers..." She started then glanced over her eyes meeting his and she swore she forgot about the world for a moment. It was like when their eyes locked together nothing else could ever matter, it was all noise. But she snapped back to reality to reply but did not move her arm, glancing down for a moment. "Actually. You are the first person that I even told about it and you will be the first to see it as well."
Carter should his head a little, laughing with the blonde. “Rubbing off on you or you’re stealing it?” He joked, though at this point in time it was border lining the truth - so far Margaret had been even more charming than he was, which wasn’t normally the case but the situation they’d found themselves in had him feeling a little nervous. That feeling somehow subsiding when the girl linked her arm with his, her touch had the most calming presence on him. “The first person, huh?” His eyes lit up like you wouldn’t believe, knowing that he was the first person she was going to be showing this place to made him feel extremely special. “Well now I’m even more excited to see it.”
Margaret stuck her tongue out at him at his comment, but a smile quickly grew onto her lips instead. When he didn't move his arm from hers she felt herself relax, her fingers even started to run along his arm. "Of course you are, no one has been able to prove themselves worthy." She admitted trying to act like she was being charming and teasing but she was telling the truth. "Plus...I don't think anyone could understand how the simplicity of it is what makes it that much more amazing." When she glanced over at him and saw how his eyes lit up she swore her heart skipped a beat. After another minute or two of walking, she turned towards a patch of trees. "Right around here." She pointed out before leading them into a small wooded area, she lead him into a spot that had a beautiful view of a old tree, a lake and a little of the city skyline.
Unable to stop himself from laughing when Margaret poked out her tongue in his direction, Carter shook his head once again. The smile on his lips seemingly not able to fade even the slightest when in her presence. “Well then if that’s the case, I could only hope I’m worthy after all these years.” He teased, as she began to lead him through the trees, swallowing hard he mustered the courage to slip his arm from hers and instead grabbed one of her hands, lacing his fingers through hers as he followed her closely. The moment they’d reached the spot they were heading, Carter let out a content sigh as he took in the view. “Wow..”
When he took her hand and laced their fingers together she swore she felt her heart skip a beat. She glanced back at their hands and smiled, nibbling on her bottom lip trying to focus on leading him closer to the view. "You know that painting that I keep with me while traveling? It is based off of this." She explained softly, leading him of the tree but when she stopped she stayed close to him. She kept a small version of it in her suitcase and it was her way to remind her of home and where she came from, Her shoulder brushed against his as she glanced over at him to take in his reaction, a small smile growing on her lips. "You like it?"
Trying his best to keep his cool, Carter tried not to think about how much he liked the feeling of their hands laced together. How much he didn't want to ever let her hand go or how much he couldn't imagine someone else's hand ever taking it's place. "I - Yeah, I recognise it." He was stumbling to find words, he was in awe of everything. The view, the moment, her. Glancing down at the girl for a moment, the soft of smiles on his lips. "It's beautiful," His voice quiet as he nodded a little, referring to more than just the view.
Margaret couldn’t help but move her other hand to rest on his arm. Just lost in the moment, she even took the step to let her fingers brush along his knuckles. “I mean I gave it more of a city skyline but close enough.” She rambled softly, her head ducking down to brush against his shoulder. Her head picking up almost just in time to meet his eyes. His soft smile made her heart skip a beat, even a quiet breath left her lips at the sight. The way he looked at her...she can’t just be seeing things right? “Captivating...” She mumbled, her eyes couldn’t help but linger over his features. Taking in the sight and how the remaining light hit his features. It was unfair how gorgeous he could look in any setting or light. He was perfect, this was perfect. It all almost felt like a dream.
Carter felt his breath catch in his throat as their eyes locked, nobody had ever had this effect on him. Ever. And maybe the reason for that was because his mind knew there was only one person designed for him, and none of them were it. None of them were Margaret. Everywhere she touched, his skin grew warm beneath her fingers. "Y - Yeah, captivating.." His eyes hadn't left hers, it was becoming increasingly obvious that he wasn't talking about the skyline, the lake or the view - but instead, her. The way her hair fell perfectly against her shoulders and back, the way the sunset brought out the blue in her eyes. Nothing about this moment could've been anymore perfect. Carter's eyes glanced down at the girl's lips for a moment, swallowing softly as his free hand lifted up and gently cupped at her face before finally leaning in and pressing his lips against hers.
Margaret brought her hand to reach on top of his, her eyes and hand never leaving his. Was this all real? He was leaning towards her, he was going to kiss her. Someone who had a hold her heart since they met. A person who found her and showed her all that she is and could be, her confidence the chances she took was all thanks to him. Although everything felt so real, so amazing as soon as his lips pressed against hers. Everything and everyone melted away from her, they were in their own paradise. A place where the fireworks that she only heard about in movies started to go off in her. Her fingertips ran along his knuckles before moving down his arm. Finally moving to rest on his jawline. Tracing his skin and taking every moment in as she moved her lips against his. Almost tugging him towards her with their hands, the distance, even though it was small, felt like too much.
The moment their lips collided, a wave of calm washed over him it was like everything just melted away - everything around them ceased to exist, it was just them. After spending as long as he could remember wondering what this exact moment would feel like, it was finally here. After spending years talking himself out of kissing her, he was finally doing it and it was even more than he ever could've hoped for. His head turning just slightly into her touch as the girl's fingertips grazed his jawline. Wrapping his free hand around the girl's waist and pulling her toward himself, needing the distance between them to no longer exist.
When his arms wrapped around her, her hand moved to softly brush into his hair. She didn’t know where she started and he began a was exactly how it was suppose to be, how it is meant to be. Now that she had the taste, now that she was in his arms she knew she couldn’t turn back. If anything she wondered how in the world they managed to wait so long for this. She led his hand where their fingers were laced together to wrap around her waist. Her other hand moving to his neck, her nails running along his skin. Letting her fingers explore him, wanting to take in anything and everything. Little things she could touch and fall in love with before she took a chance to explore. Even though her heart was beating out of her chest that didn’t stop her from the small step of confidence to lead them so her back could press against the tree.
The fact that the two were surrounded by an entire camera crew had no effect on Carter, in fact it was the furthest thing from his mind. He didn't care what people were going to say once they saw the footage or how it made them look, all he cared about was the feeling he got when they lips were pressed together and how he could get that feeling to last forever. As the two moved just slightly, their lips never parting as Margaret's back made contact with the tree. Both of Carter's hand moved down the girl's body, gripping at her thighs as he lifted her off of the ground, deepening the kiss as he did so.
When she felt his hands move down her body, a soft whimper left her lips. If she thought his touch drove her crazy before this took her to another level. It relaxed her but made energy shoot through her body. The perfect mix that made a small smile grow on her lips. Effortlessly moving with him to let her legs wrap around him her ankles crossing once she did so. Even though this was their first kiss, and an amazing one at that, their bodies seemed to know how to work in perfect harmony. Her arms wrapping around his shoulders, her fingers moving through his hair holding him close to her. Her grip on his hair tightening when the kiss deepened. Taking another step of confidence as she moved to nibble on his bottom lip and tugged softly. A small smile playing on her lips as she melted into the kiss again. Wondering how in the world they had gone so long without taking this step together.
Everything about this moment felt completely and utterly perfect, Carter couldn’t have asked for their first kiss to have gone any better, he felt like he was on cloud nine, it was everything he imagined it would be. As Margaret’s fingers tugged on his hair he just about shuttered at the feeling and the moment she bit at his lip sent a shock running through him in the best possible way. When their kiss continued to deepen, Carter felt himself needing a breather so after a few more minutes had past, he lowered the girl back to her feet. His hands moving back up to cup her face as his lips finally parted from hers, his dark eyes slowly opening to meet with hers, searching for any indication of how she was feeling after the moment they’d both shared.
When he started to lower her she almost didn't want to let go, worried about this moment ending. But the moment his hands moved to her cheeks, she swore she felt herself melt all over again. As he slowly parted from her, she leaned forward almost following his lips before letting her eyes slowly flutter open as well. A smile slowly grew on her lips as their eyes met, she was almost sure that her eyes were the shapes of hearts and sparkling. Letting her fingers continue to move through his hair, as she leaned forward and let her nose brush against his. "CC...." She whispered softly, "That was..." She started to say breathlessly, not even sure how to make words but she knew she had to say something.
Carter kept his eyes locked with Margaret's, the sides of his mouth slowly tucking up into a smile. He had never been able to stop himself from smiling around her, especially not when she smiled. Her smile had a hold on him like nothing ever had before. Gently nudging his nose against the girl's as his hand moved to brush a little of her hair behind her ear. "I - Yeah.." He began, his voice low and raspy as he nodded his head just slightly. "It was." His eyes still unable to look away from hers, too in awe of her beauty to risk looking away for even one second.
When she saw his smile she let a relieved sigh leave her lips, she was worried...but who wouldn't be when you took this kind of step with someone. Especially someone that you cared about as much as Margaret cared about Carter. He was her world and everything she could want or need, she couldn't even think or possibly want another person to take that spot for her. When his nose nudged against hers, her nibbled on her bottom lip the corners of her lips still turned up in a smile. Then her head tilted into his touch as his fingers moved to brush her hair away. His low and raspy voice made her heart feel like it was beating out her chest, even moreso than before. "Amazing doesn't feel like a good enough word for it....I...." She started trying to find the words, "I don't know how this didn't happen sooner."
Carter felt as if he were floating, his whole body was at ease and softened under her touch. Nobody had ever had that effect on him before and he was sure that nobody ever would again, just Margaret. He needed that, he needed someone who softened him and made him a little less rough around the edges. The red head couldn't help but hum softly in response to the girl's words, her inability to find words to sum up their connection was exactly how he felt. Clearing his throat softly before speaking "I don't know how either and as much as I wish we could've been doing this a long time ago, nothin' beats right here right now." He admitted, his eyes finally leaving hers to take in the view once more, it really was breathtaking.
Margaret leaned forward to let her forehead rest against his temple when he looked back out at the view again, "It is perfect...even better than anything I could have....and have imagined." She admitted softly, her voice barley above a whisper. Pressing a soft kiss to his cheek before picking her head up to just admire him. "Wait..." She said after really taking in what he said, "You have been wanting this to happen for awhile too?" She asked him as she moved one of her hands so her fingers could run along his jawline again. "Do we...feel the same way?" She asked him with a little shred of worry in her voice, because even though everything was perfect she needed to be sure.
Carter couldn't help but lean softly into the girl as she pressed her head against him, taking in a deep breath he just allowed himself to really take in the moment. In all of the scenarios he'd imagined in his head of what their first kiss would be like, he never imagined it'd be so picturesque. It was like something straight out of a movie. His eyes still overlooking the city skyline as he nodded a little, "Pretty much since the day we first met in that little café in Brooklyn.." His glance met hers again. "There's always been a part of me that has wanted to do just that."
"Brooklyn..." She repeated and let out a breathless laugh, her smile growing, "That was an amazing day...I still to this day can't believe I was lucky enough for you to reach out to me." Their first kiss, talking about how they felt, how they first met....her heart could barely handle it. "You made my heart feel like it was beating out of my chest before...and to this day you still do. Especially right now...." She said as she met his eyes, "It only ever does that for you, you know...you have such a special hold over me." Something about this moment and being in his arms, she had to put this all out on the table for them. She couldn't imagine a better moment to do so...she already knew she would be smiling about this day for the rest of her life.
A soft chuckle falling from his lips as he watched her reminisce on the first day they met, times were a lot simpler back then and though life threw them both in opposite directions they still were able to build the incredible relationship they had and for that, Carter would always be thankful. "Of course," He furrowed his brows a little, one of the only things the boy wished he could change about Margaret was the way she saw herself, he wanted her to have all of the confidence in herself that he had in her. "You're amazing at what you do, punch my name into google and see how many pictures of me smiling come up - very little, and I bet my bottom dollar that any I am smiling in have your name attached to them." He meant every word he said. As the girl began to admit how she felt, he felt his heart begin to quicken, nodding slowly.
Her thumb ran along his skin as he spoke, her eyes admiring any feature she could. Especially when he chuckled, the way he would give her a small smile and how he would sometimes shake his head. Almost everything she did, she could find something to admire about him. Her eyebrows raising when she saw him furrow his eyebrows having a feeling it must have something to do with her confidence. Of course she had more than enough of it, but she always didn't have as much as she could in her work. "Carter..." She said softly but felt her smile growing again, along with a blush spreading on her cheeks. "You think so? Well it is a total honor to have my name attached to them." She said then took that step and reached to grab his hand placing it right where her heartbeat was. Glancing down at their hands, "It has always been yours, you know..." Margaret started, "There is no one else I can or what to trust with it."
Carter felt his breath catch in his throat, her words making him feel more uneasy than anything else. This was the girl of his literal dreams, standing in front of him confessing how she felt and all he could do was freeze. When his hand came into contact with her heart, the moment he felt it beating made him feel physically sick. He didn't deserve to have this hold over her, he didn't deserve to be the one that made her feel this way. She was saying everything he'd ever hoped for - everything he'd ever wanted her to say and yet, all of a sudden he was was feeling extremely nauseous at the thought of them being together being an actual possibility. "Gracie.." He breathed, his eyes falling closed for a minute as he shook his head, pulling his head from her chest. "I'm really sorry.. I can't do this."
Margaret let her fingers run along his knuckles after she placed his hand on her heart, she was taking a big leap. Of course they admitted they wanted this to happen, and maybe she took a step too far to admit how much she cares about him. But her love for him? She couldn't hold it back, he deserved to know. Her eyes quickly moved up to meet his when he pulled his hand away from hers, "Carter...what?" She asked and she swore the heart that was beating out of her chest just dropped. "What do you mean you can't do this?" She asked, her eyebrows furrowing together, "Did I say something...or do something?" Her voice coming out shaky as she tried to take a breath. Concern and worry written all over her face, she didn't...she couldn't sit with the idea that maybe she worked this up to a lot more than she thought it was.
Carter knew the effect those four words would have on the girl, he knew what him saying them especially in this exact moment would do to her. He'd broken a lot of hearts in his day but he'd never thought he'd ever break Margaret's heart and he knew that was exactly what was happening and it was killing him. The girl's words hit him like a tonne of bricks, his chest growing tighter and tighter as he could hear the pain in her voice. The boy softly began to shake his head, knowing that no matter what he said at this point he wasn't going to be able to justify the pain he was putting her in. "I - You didn't do anything, it's me.. I just - can't." He wanted to pull her in for a hug, hold her body against his, take a deep breath and fill his lungs just one last time with the smell of her shampoo. But he couldn't. "I'm sorry.." His voice cracked just the slightest bit as he turned away from her, making his way back the way they'd came.
Margaret's eyes tried to meet and search his but she knew this was already a lost cause. She knew he didn't like commitment but she thought she could be the exception, she hoped she could be. But that dream was quickly pulled from her grip, and so was the only person that she knew she couldn't survive with out. And how he was pulling away from her to walk away. "Please no, don't walk away from me. Please, not now..." She called out to him, her voice cracking through the tears rolling down her cheeks. Almost running to keep up with him her hand reach out to him but she missed him. "Carter..." Margaret tried to call out but instead it came out in a sob, wrapping one of her arms around herself and the other reaching out for something...anything. The world was spinning and crashing around her, everything was hitting her like a million bricks until she couldn't stand anymore. Causing her to move to sit on the side walk and hide her face in her hands.
@msjackiestjames in bold, @serpentsantana in italics
Santana felt awful. She knew the decision had been hard, that they'd made it the three of them for the good of the serpents, but it didn't take away from the fact that they'd destroyed people's homes. Not to mention, it was Dani. Dani who probably meant more to her than she'd ever care to admit. So maybe her intentions weren't entirely good when she asked to hang out with Jackie, but she needed a distraction from the guilt eating her up inside. She'd barely even seen Lex recently with everything going on, and for some reason she was almost nervous to see her. Standing in front of Jackie's door, she hesitated for a moment, before knocking quickly and biting down on her lip. She was dressed as always in tight leather pants, a baggy grey sleeveless crop top, and her serpents jacket.
When Jackie woke up the next day after enjoying her glasses of wine, she did not realize she had way to much fun texting people as well. She texted her brother, Santana, and a few other people. Complimenting up a storm to everyone and maybe she sent a few pictures here and there. But she felt so bad for trying to get up in Santana’s business. Of course she knew she was trying to help and be supportive but she didn’t know if Santana felt the same way. It hasn’t exactly been that clear and open between them for the last couple months. All she hoped is that they were still friends at least, even if they haven’t talked as much. She was snapped from her thoughts when she heard a knock at her door. She got up and made her way to the door in her tight leggings, and intricate black sports bra. But at the last minute she threw on a zip up hoodie. Realizing it might not be the smartest thing to wear. So she zipped it up half way before she opened the door. “Santana, hey. Come on in please.” She said and stepped to the side. “Is there anything I can get you? Like food or water?”
Santana glanced up from the floor as Jackie opened the door, blinking at her and managing a smile, walking inside and shrugging off her Serpents jacket. "Hey," she murmured, glancing around. It had been a while since she'd been at Jackie's place. "Uh, do you have any soda?"
Jackie gave her a soft smile, one she didn’t give out too often. But she was willing to do what she could to help her feel better. Especially if she was still feeling down about what the gossip blog said. “Yeah of course. Dr. Pepper, Pepsi, Sprite.” She listed off, “Just don’t let Jesse know I keep that all that he is more of a health nut than me.” She joked, trying to lighten up the air.
“I’ll take a Pepsi,” Santana said, moving into the apartment more, hanging her jacket over the back of a chair and turning round to face the other girl. “Don’t worry, I don’t exactly talk to your idiot brother.”
“Pepsi it is then!” Jackie said with her signature smile but quickly put her hands on her hips. “You are lucky I think you are wonderful or else I would not like to hear my brother be called that. He is just a different kind of person.” She spoke but still had the smile on her face. Then turned to go to the kitchen, “But make yourself comfortable! I’ll get your soda.”
Santana glanced up, sighing and shrugging, "Sorry, I guess I'm just not in a great mood." She moved then to the sofa, kicking off her boots and curling up on her side, staring at the blank tv screen in front of her.
Jackie heard her apologize when she got to the kitchen. That simple action made her raise her eyebrows. The girl never apologized...not even for saying things about her brother. She quickly grabbed the soda and a glass and made her way out. “Hey no...I was just giving you trouble you don’t have to...” she started and then saw her turned to the side staring off. “Santana...what’s wrong?” She asked as she made her way to her and sat down the soda on the counter then sat next to her.
Santana raised an eyebrow at that, glancing slowly to her side at the other girl. "Oh, I'm fine," she murmured, pausing a moment before reaching to take the sofa from the counter but not opening it yet.
“Just fine?” Jackie asked, starting to really wonder what’s wrong. But she moved to rest her back against the couch as she watched her. “You know we don’t have to talk about it. We can do anything else. Even just watching tv together.”
Santana paused, placing her soda back down without opening and turning to face the other girl. She shifted closer, gently tugging Jackie's legs over hers and leaning in, lifting a hand to brush a hair behind the girl's ear. "Just talk to me, about you, about how you are. Distract me."
A soft smile grew on Jackie’s lips when she moved her legs over hers. She couldn’t even help but tilt her head into the Santana’s touch. But she quickly snapped back to reality when she spoke. “Mhm yes about me. I can do that.” She thought for a moment before speaking. “Well the dance classes are going very well. I am even getting a turn out for the adult dance classes too which I was really looking forward too.” She started to ramble, not realizing how she hasn’t talked about herself in a minute.
Santana bit her lip, eyes focused on the other girl, running one of her hands up her leg, stroking her thumb over the material of her leggings on her thigh. God, Jackie was gorgeous. Always so willing to be there to please her in any way.
Jackie was trying her best to stay focused on talking as she felt the other girls touch. “The people in charge were hesitant to have any kind of provocative dancing...but honestly I don’t see what’s wrong with letting people have confidence with themselves.” Something that was always important to her, even though she had her fair share of selfish moments. “And me myself? I am doing pretty good. Just keeping myself busy, like I always do.”
Santana slid her hand slightly further up, her eyes drifting down briefly to glance at the other girl's lips. Jackie's lips were incredible, there was no denying that. So kissable. She bit down harder on her own bottom lip, breathing out slowly and nodding at what the girl was saying. "I'm glad you're doing good, gorgeous," she murmured.
Jackie could feel the other girls touch, she could feel the heat in her skin as her eyes on hers. And she couldn’t deny she saw the others girls eyes and where they wandered too. She had to let out a breath before speaking again. “Thank you. I am glad things are going well too. Sometimes I guess a normal routine is better than being involved with all the chaos and drama going on.”
Santana found herself lifted her other hand to brush back some of Jackie's hair, running her fingers through it as her first hand curled around her thigh. "I feel that. I'm so over chaos and drama at this point. I ... I feel drained."
Jackie gave a comforting smile to the girl, even though her touch made it hard to catch her breath. “I know...we all do. And some more than others, unfortunately. Everyone needs a break or an escape or something.”
Santana dropped her hand, tugging the girl closer, basically pulling her onto her lap. "Definitely," she murmured, "I just feel like I don't know how to do that anymore.”
To say Jackie was surprised when she pulled her closer. She bit her bottom lip for a moment before nodding. “Well I am sure you can figure it out...you can do anything you put your mind too, Tana.” She said softly before letting a soft breath out, “and sometimes you just need someone to turn to. And I am sure you have that...” She started looking up to find the girls reaction.
Santana managed a small smile at that, her hand still moving gently over the girl's legs. "Yeah," she murmured, meeting Jackie's eyes and biting her own lip again, "I think I do."
Her eyes couldn’t help but lock to the other girls when they met. Dear god, those eyes could still captivate her...and when she bit her lip like that. She had to blink her eyes a time or two to believe she was really this close to her. “Yeah?” She asked honestly not knowing what to do with herself.
Santana chewed on her bottom lip, one of her hands settling on Jackie's waist, the other lifting up now to trail the backs of her fingers down the girl's cheek.
Jackie’s eyes fluttered when her hands moved and even more so when her fingers moved down her cheek. “Santana...” She started, because even though she was captivated she knew the look in the other girls eyes. “I...what about...” Jackie started, not even able to make out words.
"Sh," Santana murmured, her hand cupping the girl's jaw, nudging her nose against the other's, knowing inherently this was wrong, but godamnit, she needed a distraction and how could she resist Jackie St. James?
Jackie let a shaky breath leave her lips when she nudged her nose against hers. Something that immediately brought her mind back to the other times they spent together. “This wouldn’t be right, Tana...” she muttered softly to her, trying her best to not let her eyes flutter closed.
Santana tilted her head slightly, her thumb running over Jackie's bottom lip, "Stop talking," she whispered, her lips barely an inch from Jackie's at this point.
“I...” Jackie started to say, before her thumb ran over her bottom lip. “But...what about?” She asked, not knowing if she missed anything...she wasn’t going to get in the way of anything. Her eyes met hers when she said stop talking, her eyes filled with a mixture of confusion and softness.
"Please just kiss me," Santana whispered, her eyes meeting the other girl's, hand still cupping her cheek, leaning in slightly.
Jackie had wondered why she wasn’t saying anything about the girl that started their conversation the other day. But she wouldn’t be doing this if things were okay right? So many questions were running though her head as she pressed a soft kiss to the other girls lips. Their lips barely brushing together, just ever so slightly giving into what she asked.
Santana felt herself melting against Jackie's lips, her eyes fluttering closed, trying to ignore everything else and focusing on the other girl. She slipped her tongue out over the seam of Jackie's lips then, tilting her head.
Jackie let a whimper leave her lips when she felt her tongue along her lips. She parted them slightly, not know why or how she just couldn’t say no to Santana. Of course she was never able to before and why would she be able to now.
Santana pressed in closer, sliding her tongue past her lips and kissing her desperately now, her hand curling into Jackie's hair, her other arm winding around her waist to pull her closer against her.
The desperate kiss almost made Jackie melt into a puddle right then and there. Jackie finally moved into her lap when she pulled her closer. Her hands moving to cup the girls cheeks, letting her thumbs softly run along her jawline.
Santana roamed her hands down Jackie's back, before moving to the front to unzip her hoody quickly, gasping softly against her lips and glancing down at her. "Why are you so gorgeous?" she murmured.
Jackie felt her confidence grow when she heard the girl gasped at her. She pressed a soft peck to her lips and smirked slightly. “Mhm I think all of your compliments just made it into a reality.” She teased, her voice still breathless.
Santana chuckled breathlessly, leaning back and pulling the girl down with her as she kissed her again, her hand tangling in her hair.
Jackie let out a sigh when she pulled her back down to meet her lips. Her hands moved to the girls arms then ran to down to rest on her sides. Her fingers running along the girls bare skin below her crop top.
Santana reached to push Jackie's hoody down her shoulders, her hands moving up then to cup her face as she kissed her eagerly, hooking her leg around one of the other's.
Jackie let her hoodie fall to the floor and then moved her hands back Santana’s shoulders then into her hair. A mixture of a sigh and a moan left her lips when the girl brought them closer to each other. Promoting her fingers in her hair to tug slightly.
Santana kissed her almost desperately, but already her head was spinning. She could feel the guilt eating at her stomach.
Jackie parted for a moment leaving a kiss on the corner of her lips, she was going to let her lips wander to her jawline but she stopped ready her expression. Letting her forehead rest against the other girls, as heavy breaths escaped her.
Santana kept her eyes closed as Jackie rested her forehead against hers, breathing out shakily, a tear slipping down her cheek, “F-fuck, I’m sorry-“
Jackie felt her heart fall when she watched the tear roll down her cheek, she quickly wiped it away. "Tana..." She muttered out, "Santana...Don't cry....we both weren't thinking." She tried to say, anything to try to comfort her.
Santana lifted her hands to cover her face, shaking her head and staying silent, feeling awful,
Jackie moved from the girls lap, letting a soft sigh leave her lips. She pulled the other girl into a hug and kept her close. Of course she knew it wasn't the best idea, but they already didn't make the best ones this evening. "Sh...I should have pushed you away...I should have done something." She reasoned as she looked out at her living room.
“No,” Santana mumbled, “This wasn’t on you.” She let the girl pull her in though, burying her face into Jackie’s neck. “I’m sorry- some- some shit happened and I just- I just wanted to distract myself-“
Jackie squeezed her slightly, letting her know she was there for her. Then she let one of her hands moved to run over hair when she hid her face in her neck. Trying her best to stay calm as guilt started to fill her up as well. That and the word distraction...that hit something for her but she just took a deep breath. "I know, I know....things haven't been easy lately, they haven't been for anyone..." She said softly to her, as she let her fingers run through the girls hair.
Santana whimpered quietly, holding onto Jackie. “You don’t- but I’m just...” she breathed out shakily, “I’m sorry, fuck,” she pulled back and wiped her eyes quickly. “God, I shouldn’t be bothering you like this.”
When the girl pulled away from her she loved one of he hands to run through then fix the girls hair. She heard the girl ramble then gave her a soft smile. “You aren’t bothering me, okay? I promise.” Jackie said honestly and hoped Santana could see it in her eyes. “It would be hard for you to get to the point of bothering me...I am confused yes but not bothered.”
Santana breathed out shakily again, meeting Jackie’s eyes. “I - I didn’t mean to just -“ she paused, eyes sad. “I think I just- look this isn’t me just- using you- I don’t want you to think that-“
Jackie was doing a fairly good job keeping her worries and guilt pressed down, something she was very talented at. But when she heard Santana said she wasn't just using her a breath left her lips that she didn't know she was holding in. "That is good to know...thank you." She said and continued to move a hand through the girls hair. "Just take a breath or try to okay?"
Santana breathed out slowly, nodding, “You know that though, right?” She murmured, “There’s always been this... thing between us.”
Jackie tried to make out words but she just nodded, her eyes staying on Santana's while moving her hand from her hair to rest on her back. "Yeah..." She finally whispered softly, "There always has been...I mean I have been worried if it was just me but...yes."
Santana’s shoulders fell slightly, nodding with sad eyes. “I kind of was ignoring it best I could,” she murmured, “but fuck whenever we’d be together, it was always so good.”
"We both were." She admitted, her eyes mirroring the sadness. Even though she was trying to be the one to comfort Santana, she knew she needed the other girls comfort just as much. "So, so good....And it just felt right. You knew...know so much about me, more than a lot of people do."
Santana shifted closer again, a couple tears still running down her cheeks, “Do you want me to go?” She asked quietly. “I know I’m - I’m putting a lot on your right now.”
Jackie quickly lifted her other hand to wipe the tears from her cheeks, her other hand starting to softly rub her back. Wanting to do anything to soothe her and make things better, even though they were both in a mess right now. "No..I really don't...unless you want to." She spoke, small stutters in her voice. "I am sure it is a lot for you too."
Santana sighed softly, “I can’t stay, but no, I don’t want to go just yet.” She lifted her hand to take Jackie’s hand, squeezing it tight. “I’ve fucked up a lot.”
Jackie nodded at what she said, understanding what she meant, "Of course...yes,yeah. Not just yet...is perfect." She said and moved her eyes to look at their hands, a small smile on her lips when she squeezed it. "I...yeah, things got messed up. For sure...What are we going to do about this?" She asked slowly bringing her eyes back to hers.
Santana sighed, rubbing at her eyes with her spare hand, “This isn’t your problem to worry about.”
Jackie watched the girl rub her eyes and took the turn to squeeze her hand again. "I know..." She mumbled softly, "But if there is anything I can do. Even just in the moment, I could just be company. I think I am still pretty great at cuddles." She said trying to give the girl a slightly bigger smile.
Santana's eyes saddened, holding tight to the other girl's hand. "You're too good for me, Jacks. Way too good for me."
"No...no." Jackie said when she saw the girls eyes sadden, scared she said something wrong. "Tana...I have always been there for you...even though there is more confusion now. It has nothing to do with one of us being better for or than the other." She said softly, letting her thumb running along the girls knuckles.
Santana laughed bitterly, sadly, shaking her head, "You don't know though," she murmured, "Fuck, I've fucked so many things up. You have no idea. And I - I can't tell you, because I can't face how you'd look at me if I did."
"So many things?" Jackie asked, the whole time thinking just this moment was what they were talking about. She moved her other hand to cup the girls cheek, "You don't have to tell me okay? Not that it would change anything, but I don't know and I shouldn't act like I could." She said softly, "And I can't imagine I can make it all better but I can help a little bit."
Santana looked back at her, her own eyes sad, feeling the guilt eating up at her. Especially when she found herself leaning in slightly as if to kiss her again, before catching herself and lurching back. She shook her head, pulling away from her. "I - I think I'm gonna go," she said, moving to stand and looking around for where she'd left her jacket.
Jackie quickly stood up when she got up and picked up her own hoodie and zipped it back up again. "Tana..." She said, knowing the sight of her pulling away so quickly would be sitting in her memory. She watched her eyes, "I...yeah if that is what you want." Jackie couldn't hide the sadness or guilt in her eyes either, but she parted from her and walked over to her jacket, grabbing it for her. "For all that went down...regardless, it was nice to see you again. Really."
Santana clenched her jaw, trying her hardest not to let herself cry anymore. She took the jacket from the other girl, hesitating a moment before stepping closer and cupping Jackie's cheek with one hand, "You deserve the world, Jackie. Don't let anyone who's less than that fool you into thinking otherwise."
Jackie placed her hand on top of hers when she cupped her cheek, her fingers running along the girls knuckles. A shaky breath falling from her lips, but she nodded, "Thank you, I will try my best to remember that. Promise." She muttered softly, the words taking her back. Of course her family has told her that before but hearing it from someone else...especially from Santana it tugged at something in her. Jackie blinked her eyes to try to hide the sadness that was really starting to become prominent.
Santana nodded stiffly, "Good," she murmured, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her cheek before pulling back. "I... I'm sorry for everything," she said quietly, pulling on her jacket and moving now for the door.
Jackie let her eyes flutter closed for a moment when the girl kissed her cheek. It took everything in her to not just pull her closer again. Her eyes opening when she spoke, "Its okay..." She whispered softly to the girl watching as she walked away. "Tana-Santana." She said softly to her taking a step forward.
Santana paused with her hand on the door handle, glancing back at her with wide eyes.
"This won't ruin us...will it?" Jackie said and realized she should continue, "Our friendship." She added on, her voice barely above a whisper. "I don't know what would happen if I really lost you."
Santana turned at that, "Jacks-" she whispered, "It's not this that's ruined it. I just can't do this to you, okay?"
When she turned around, Jackie had to wrap her arms around herself to stop from reaching out to her. "Doing what to me?" She asked her eyes, "I mean friends we should be able to do that right? Maybe not right away or right now...but at some point?" Jackie asked her eyes big, full of sadness and almost begging.
Santana breathed out shakily, shaking her head. "You don't understand. There's so much you don't understand, just trust me, okay? You're better off without having to worry about me."
"Its not like I can help that, Tana." Jackie mumbled, her eyes drifting away for a moment trying to fight her own tears that she felt starting to come up. "But if that is what you really want...I'll do that or at least try my best to."
It wasn't what she wanted at all, but she was getting tired of fucking things up for people she cared about. She couldn't believe she'd just cheated on Lex, and dragged Jackie into it all too. She cared about this girl, she couldn't deny it, so she knew the best thing was to just distance herself from her. "It is," she said quietly, unsure if the lie was convincing or not, but turning and opening the door, moving quickly out and along the corridor, not giving Jackie another chance to stop her.
WARNINGS: Slightly drunk if not fully drunk adults who get their mack on.
WORD COUNT: 2,436
BLAINE:
Maybe one and a half drinks in Blaine was already feeling the buzz taking over his head. It was causing him to be flirtier and more forward with people he’d otherwise only hit on inside of his head. It wasn’t so much that he was shy or too much of a prude for all of that but rather he worried too much about what people thought. Tomorrow he would probably be mortified by all the things he had done but that was tomorrow’s problem. Right now his problem was that he couldn’t find Roderick. Aw, Roderick was so cute. He was like a big teddy bear and so handsome with his glasses and voice that could make Blaine melt into a puddle. Truth be told, he’d never be able to admit this but there was a part of Blaine that had thought about people he would date, given the chance and Roderick was certainly near the top of that list.
Blushing to himself, Blaine tried not to laugh before looking up and seeing the other man. Before another couple could take the closet, he reached out and grabbed Roderick’s hand, intertwining their fingers together with a soft smile up at him. “Hi there, handsome…” Blaine said while his thumb gently brushed against the back of the other man’s hand. “Do you want to be fair about it and spin the bottle first or should we cheat and just jump right into the closet?”
RODERICK:
Roderick started out by standing alone, wondering why he’d come to this party, when he clearly wasn’t the partying type. It wasn’t that he didn’t drink, he just didn’t do it often. Or at least, to the extent that he’d already seen a few of his peers experience. After loosening up with a few other people, and realizing that maybe letting himself drink wasn’t too bad of an idea, Roderick had somehow ended up getting more that buzzed. He liked it; he felt free and confident and less awkward. At the very least, he could talk to people a little easier. He’d been drinking a shot with some random people when he got a text and then he was on a mission. Where was Blaine? He liked Blaine, he had a nice smile and a nice voice and a kind soul. And he was very, very attractive. He was the kinda guy Roderick would date, though, he’d never dated before, so it wasn’t exactly a thing he thought about.
Roderick found Blaine near where he said he’d be, though it took some time to find him and he grinned. He liked the way it felt to have his hand in Blaine’s and he was glad they’d found each other. God, he was so gorgeous and Roderick couldn’t help but feel a little excited at what they were to do next. He’d always secretly wanted to kiss Blaine and now he’d get to. “Imm not handsome.” Roderick slurred with a slight blush, though his cheeks were already pretty red and warm. “That’s cheating, Blaine.” He laughed a little, “but if I spin the bottle, it might land on...on not you.” He pulled on Blaine’s arm and he feels a little more confident and less like he cares about how he’ll feel about this tomorrow. “Just take me to the closet, baby.”
BLAINE:
Normally Blaine wasn’t a drinker, he was usually the type to be the designated sober friend, especially if he had to drive but at this moment he was more than glad he had a drink because it gave him courage. It gave him the courage to look up at Roderick without glancing away afraid that the other man would find him too bold. It gave him the courage to enjoy the moment. Roderick was so nice and soft that he made Blaine’s heart pound harder at the thought of them even holding hands like this. “It is cheating. Oh my god, we’re such bad boys,” he giggled but when Roderick agreed to live rebelliously, Blaine didn’t hesitate before cutting in the line and pulling the taller man into the closet with him. Once the door closed, Blaine stepped in closer, letting go of the other man’s hand and reaching up to cradle his face, Blaine pushed up on to his toes until they were almost at the same level. “Hi…” Blaine whispered bashfully, looking at the incredibly handsome man. How did one say, please kiss me until we’re both breathless, without sounding too desperate? Even slightly tipsy, it wasn’t as easy as just blurting it out. “Is this okay?” He asked, letting his thumbs brush over Roderick’s flushed warm cheeks.
RODERICK:
Roderick let Blaine pull him along, he was good at being a follower anyway and this time he really didn't mind following. Especially since it was following Blaine into the closet. He laughed, and the door closed and suddenly Blaine was stepping closer. He definitely felt intoxicated now and the room was kind of spinning, but in a good way. Blaine was shorter than Roderick, which didn't bother him one bit as the other boy stood up on his toes, Roderick smiles. He wants to kiss him softly and push him against the wall at the same time but he's not sure what to go with. He thinks that this isn't the time to be romantic, but Blaine is asking him if it's okay and oh it so is okay and then Roderick can't help but touch the other boy's cheek and let his fingers spread to behind his head, pulling him in. "So okay." he says, he's probably slurring his words, but it doesn't matter because Roderick decides to just go for it and kiss Blaine.
BLAINE:
Normally Blaine would take his time in this sort of situation, especially with Roderick. He was such a good guy, all he deserved was someone who would worship him with the softest kisses. The romantic in Blaine imagined them surrounded by flowers and fireworks before their lips met but this wasn’t the right setting for that. Not in the mostly dark closet with people outside cheering and wolf calling about what they speculated could be happing in the confined space. “Good… because I like this…” The brush on his cheek was soft and sweet, it brought a warmth to Blaine’s chest and he could feel his heart racing. Jesus, the drinking didn’t only bring out the bolder part of him but apparently made Blaine even sappier because as he leaned into Roderick’s touch, eyelids covered his hazel eyes, making Blaine sway a little on his tiptoes until their noses bumped together when he was brought in closer. Yes. This was perfect. The noise from outside disappeared once their lips were pressed together. It was a tender, if not shy kiss at first, Blaine’s arms wrapping around the taller man’s neck to push himself even closer. Blaine took the initiative and used his tongue to gently nudge at Roderick’s lips wanting nothing more than to deepen the kiss.
RODERICK:
Roderick opened his mouth to allow for Blaine's tongue. He liked this...it felt nice and soft and if he were more sober, he'd be focusing on the thoughts swirling in his head. Blaine was a good kisser...and Roderick would have thought about making this special. He wasn't the kind of guy to make out in a closet, but there was no way he was going to stop now. This was....wonderful and everything Roderick wished for. He liked being drunk, and confident. and kissing Blaine.
Roderick kisses him softly at first, letting their tongues dance softly, but maybe it was the alcohol talking or his own body, but the arms around Roderick's neck felt warm and his hands found themselves traveling down Blaine's body and pulling him closer to him. They only had 7 minutes, Roderick remembered, and so he decided to play the game right and be bold. He pushes Blaine backwards gently, letting him hit the wall, pressing himself against him. He's not sure if this is the best idea, letting the smaller one of them press against the wall - Roderick usually would be worried he would smush him - but fortunately, his intoxicated state keeps those thoughts at bay and instead of worrying, Roderick kisses him harder.
BLAINE:
There might have been a little linger guilt in the depths of Blaine’s stomach or maybe that was just fear that in the morning, he’d feel cheap for being so slutty all night -- but the moment Roderick’s mouth opened and Blaine could taste the bittersweetness of the drink hit him, it made his head spin more. Greed was probably one of his worst personality traits and right now as the shorter male devoured the taller man’s mouth, he couldn’t feel any remorse in that. Instead, he indulged in everything that was happening to him. Every part of Roderick filled Blaine’s senses and he was intoxicated by it.
Soft kisses were nice and to be honest Blaine could have done that all night without needing more but the moment that his back hit the wall and Roderick’s body was pressed so tightly against his own, less than innocent thoughts of kissing were swirling around his head. The kisses became bolder, more intense and Blaine was ready to start getting a little handsy. In fact, he had his hands trailing down Roderick sides, hands sliding behind his back and hands grabbing full backside. It was about to get a little steamier in that closet before suddenly the door was yanked open. The noise of the wolf calls that had been outside, along with way too much light, flooded the confined space and Blaine almost jumped out of his skin. “Holy shhh---” he yelped while pulling out of the kiss, sheepishly smiling at Roderick. “I think our time’s up…”
RODERICK:
Roderick could have kissed Blaine all night, if he was being honest. His body felt like it was on fire, but he had consumed so much alcohol at this point, he wasn't sure if it was his state of inebriation or if he was that turned on. He couldn't help but want more and the logical part of his brain was struggling to keep up with his desire for pleasure. When the morning came and he had a hard time remembering what he'd done that night, he can't imagine he'd forget kissing Blaine like this...and a part of him would feel bad for letting himself get this way, but another part of him would feel glad he had the chance.
Roderick was pressing up against him, his own hands exploring Blaine the best he could and he was nearly rutting against him when Blaine's hands were on his backside...until...the door opened and Blaine pulled away in surprise. Roderick blinked, pushing up his glasses automatically and gave him a smile back. He was disappointed, but he didn't want to show it. "Seven minutes isn't very long." he said, giving a short laugh and stepping backwards. He pulled Blaine along, stumbling out of the closet, feeling like a teenager. "I think...I think that actually could have been heaven." he slurs a little, giving Blaine a grin.
BLAINE:
As they stumbled out the closet laughing with Blaine red-faced and smiling bashfully at Roderick, he couldn’t help but reach out for the man’s hand again. He really was mad that seven minutes wasn’t longer and he didn’t get to find out where things could have lead if they hadn’t been interrupted but Blaine wasn’t about to complain about the amazing thing that he already experienced. Lacing his fingers in through Roderick’s, he lead them away from the closet where other couples were waiting for their turn, he nodded. “I’m pretty sure we almost reached some kind of Nirvana in there… Um… you know… if you want to do this later… without the uh…” Oh god was it the drink or his nerves that were turning Blaine and even darker shade of red. “Without the timer… we could find a nice spot later and really find heaven?"
RODERICK:
Roderick grinned, blushing. He'd done things like this before....but this wasn't something he'd ever thought would happen. Roderick wasn't the kind of person people thought were sexy. But he wasn't thinking about that...he was thinking about how good it felt to be with Blaine and how much he wanted to do it again. "Yes..." Roderick nods at Blaine. "I think you're right....we should find heaven, Blaine." He says and he wants to kiss him again so bad but he stays where he is, holding his hand in his.
BLAINE:
Maybe it was the booze freely flowing through him that made all of Blaine’s inhibitions disappear or maybe it was the fact that the man he had just been up on in a closet was a really good friend but Blaine couldn’t stop the smile that was plastered on his face. To be quite truthful, he was ready to find a dark corner or a private room, crawl right into Roderick’s lap and continue their makeout session until the cows come home. However, just at the moment, he was going to take initiative and pull the other man somewhere else his phone started to ding with a text message. Knowing how many friends, especially women friends he had at this party, Blaine immediately checked it, finding a message from Marley. “Oh shoot… I have to fun… please come find me later and we can…” Blaine bashfully glanced up with a grin. “Round 2… please?” With that, he pushed up on to his toe just enough to close the small distance between them and pecked a quick kiss on to Roderick’s lips. “Thank you for showing me something heavenly.” And with one last smile, Blaine turned to shove through the bodies crowding the whole house to look for one of his best friends.
RODERICK:
Roderick stood there and watched Blaine, unsure of how to react. It seemed like things were going too fast around him. Blaine checks his phone and Roderick almost frowns because he was having such a good time with Blaine. He wants to take Blaine somewhere and kiss him for ages and he'd be content to do so until the end of the party. But Blaine is talking, so he focuses on that, trying to hear over the loud noises. "Yeah, yeah I'm totally...gonna do that, B." He slurs and kisses Blaine back but hes gone before he can realize it and he's a little disappointed. "No...thank you, you're so heavenly." he smiled and then Blaine disappeared into the crowd.
DETAILS: Claire asks Cyrus if he wants to go on a drive to help get her mind of things. Ends up she has to face what she was trying to escape.
TRIGGERS/WARNINGS: None
Cyrus
Cyrus threw on a hoodie as he slipped on his shoes. He wondered what was going on with Claire, but he figured he would find out once he was downstairs. He closed the door behind him after making sure he had his keys and jogged over to Claire's house, which luckily enough was across from his house. "Hey shorty." He called out when he saw her.
Claire
Claire didn't know what was coming over her, the girl who normally tried her best to ignore emotions seemed to be running into them left and right this last week or so. The emotions and confusion with Sam and trying to be on good terms with him again and then after what happened with Cyrus just didn't help it. But still after everything the person she wanted to see was Cyrus, glad that he said yes to going on a drive with her. For the first time since she got home from school a smirk grew on her lips at Cryrus's nickname, "You know you are the only one who can get away with calling me that? But hey you. Thanks for making time out of your busy schedule for me." She said teasingly, getting in the car adjusting her leather jacket when the cold air hit her.
Cyrus
"Well, I do call other girls that, not just you. So don't get comfortable with it." Cyrus pointed out as he looked at her and nodded as he slipped into the passenger seat. "You're welcome, kinda need a break from homework and looking at colleges anyway." He put his seatbelt on, started to flip through her CDs. "Let's see what kind of music you have now."
Claire
"You think I get comfortable with anything? Where is the fun in that?" Claire said as she started the car once they both got settled. "Yeah? Well I am glad it all worked out. Homework is bearable but all this college stuff is something else." She glanced over at him before focusing her eyes back on the dark roads of Lima she knew like the back of her hand. "I would like to hope I have some good variety in there. Ever since I got my job I made sure to add to the collection."
Cyrus
Cyrus shrugged a bit as he continued to flip through her CDs and nodded as he glanced over at her before he glanced ahead. "I want to make sure I don't miss out on the chances of scholarships." He replied, settled on a random CD and pop it in. "Good because I don't know which CD I just picked." He laughed as he placed the case in the back.
Claire
"You won't miss out, Cyrus. If there is anyone who can get a scholarship and get out of here, its you. No matter what you end up deciding to go to school for." Claire pressed play when he finally chose the CD, and shook her head. "Well I would hope so considering you helped me build up most of this collection." Finally the music filled the car and they were on a more open road, she let out a sigh of relief. "So what schools are you looking at?" She asked trying to distract herself from the other things running through her mind.
Cyrus
Cyrus shook his head as he relaxed against the seat and scratched his neck. "I actually didn't." He replied as he gave her knowing look and looked back ahead. He slipped his hands into his hoodie pocket and shook his head. "Nope, Im not gonna be talking about schools with you. I've already had an earful from my dad this afternoon." He glanced out the window and let out a breath.April 25, 2018
Claire
Claire lifted her fingers off from the wheel like a surrender, "No school it is, this drive is suppose to take our mind off things so nothing like that will be allowed. But just know if you need to get away from them for a bit you can come to my place. My dad said it is okay for you to stay over." She laid the offer out but soon changed the topic knowing that he didn't want to talk about it. "Well we can talk about how I think after this summer I may finally have enough money saved to go on a roadtrip this summer and bring some friends."
Cyrus
Cyrus nodded as he listened to her and looked at her. "Tell your dad thank you, really." He replied before he relaxed a bit more in his seat. "Oh yeah? Where to?"
Claire
"I will, but it is no problem. If anything he is glad that I would have some company while he is gone. It isn't easy for him to have a job where he travels so much." Claire glanced over at him smiling softly when she saw him relax. "I am not too sure yet. I am thinking of making my way to California or Florida. See if I can go when any festivals are going on."
Cyrus
"Yeah, I understand that. Maybe I'll crash at your place tonight." Cyrus replied as he looked over at her and looked back ahead as he scratched his eyebrow. "Ahhh I see. Well, if anything make sure that you get me something from there."
Claire
"Feel free to, it would be nice to have someone around. You can stay in the guest room or in the living room if you want..." Claire shook her head as she took a turn after waiting at a red light, "Oh no no, I won't be bringing you anything back because I would want you to come with me. I know how much you like to travel and you are one of the only people I think I could stay in a car with for a long period of time."
Cyrus
"Alright." Cyrus repiled before she spoke again and looked back at her. "Havent been traveling all that much though and Im sure your cousin can say something different. I'll think about it, promise."
Claire
Claire met his eyes for a moment and smiled, glad that he would accept the offer of staying over if he wanted to. No matter what happened on Saturday he was still her best friend and someone she cared a lot about. "Good I would hope that you would. The most I have done is coming here from Ireland but other than that I have been a few places. But I would like to be able to see more of it with you." Her eyes glancing over at him then back on the road, "You know a best friend is always a good person to travel with." She said hoping to clear up any tension that may be still around since Saturday.
Cyrus
Cyrus rose an eyebrow when she said that she would like to see more of it with him and he adjusted a bit in his seat. "Yeah, but maybe Sam can go with you instead? I mean, its always the best to go with him?" He suggested as he looked at her and looked back at the road. "I know, but best friends arent supposed to kiss but we did."
Claire
Claire sighed lightly her fingers tapping on the wheel, her body falling slightly when he brought Sam up. The problems that she was trying to escape from starting to come up again. "Cy, Sam is great and a nice guy. But he isn't the best friend who has known me forever." She met his eyes when she glanced over at him, running a hand through her hair at what he said. "I know...but after all that has happened with you and then with him who did I want to see tonight? Who did I know I wanted to spend time with?" It may be pushing things but she needed him to know how much she really valued him and their friendship.
Cyrus
Cyrus opened up his mouth but closed it as he bit down on his cheek and glanced outside. "Maybe it would be a good thing we can continue this conversation when we're parked somewhere because I dont wanna cause an accident." He said softly.
Claire
Claire nodded and tried her best to stay focused and find a spot for them. “Yeah...that may be a good idea.” Her voice getting softer then its normal confident tone. That is when she found the park they use to walk to when they were kids and she pulled into a spot. She put her car into park and then took a second to just stare at the wheel. Wanting to build back her confident posture and tone, but finding it hard to do so.
Cyrus
Cyrus unbuckled his seatbelt, gotten out of the car and headed towards the park. He climbed on a picnic table, pushed up his hoodie sleeves and tried to think where all of this was coming from. It was unusual for him to have an attitude towards Claire but maybe it was the fact that things were changing and he didn't accept them. He pulled out his phone, texted one of the guys from the garage about covering their shift and put it back in his pocket as he waited for her to come out of the car.
Claire
Claire watched was finally able to turn and watch him as he got out of the car. After taking a moment she shut off the car and made her way to the bench, sticking her hands in the pockets of her leather jacket. She took a seat on the bench and then looked at him. Trying to search his face for an answer of what he was wanting to say, not being able to help but be worried when he said he thinks they should be parked to talk. Finally she brought her hands out and started to fiddle with the material of her jacket as habit, "I'm sorry if I overstepped or anything...I just felt like that needed to be said." She said lightly her eyes going back to him.
Cyrus
"What needed to be said?" Cyrus asked softly as he kept looking forward. "The fact that you want to travel the world with me or the whole who I wanted to see tonight and who you wanted to see tonight? Or the college thing?" He glanced over at her briefly with an eyebrow raised.
Claire
"I guess everything..." She said looking down after he glanced at her. "I mean apart from the college stuff that was just small talk." Claire paused before she continued speaking, "But everything else, yes. And it is all true and I thought you should know that. That even after what happened on Saturday I still want you around and nothing could change that."
Cyrus
Cyrus slowly nodded as she spoke and let out a breath. "I think, with everything. We should take some time and think about what happened. I mean, to me, I need some time to get used to things on how they are now before we hang out more." He replied as he wiped his hands against his shorts. "Its happening kinda fast to me and I just need to process things." He stopped for a minute before he looked at her. "That's not why you invite me out for a ride with you, is it?"
Claire
Claire looked up at him, "I know, I understand that. I mean me too, it is a lot. Something I know we both weren't ready to have to deal with." Kind of glad that she wasn't the only one feeling like this was a whole new thing she had to try to understand. "I guess I am just so use to us always hanging out, that I didn't even think of it before asking you." She met his eyes when he looked at her. "No...no I didn't have any intentions or plan for this to be brought up. I just wanted company to clear my mind and you were the first person I thought of."
Cyrus
Cyrus listened to her, slipped his hands into his pockets and nodded. "Yeah." He replied before he let her talk once he looked away. "Why do you need your head clear? Did something happened?"
Claire
Claire looked back down at her hands before turning around to lean against the table part of the bench. "Nothing too crazy. I just needed to get away from social media, I guess. I am letting things get to me that shouldn't get to me." Her eyes watched the wind blow the trees and tried to focus on that. "And I just need to get back into my normal headset of being in my own world, I think I am just opening myself up too much again. And that never ends well."April 26, 2018
Cyrus
"Like what?" Cyrus asked as he watched her and then looked at the trees before he looked back at her. "No, but at least you're aware of what's going on instead of letting it go on for a while. I mean, opening up isn't always bad you know." He looked back ahead and chewed on his cheek once more. "Its about Sam, isn't it?"
Claire
"I know it isn't...always a bad thing. But it is just getting harder to separate who I can and can't do that with. I am just getting reminded how quickly anything and anyone can be taken away from me. And realizing that I may be the main problem in all of those circumstances, like I am the common denominator." Finally Claire took a breath after she got it out off her chest then leaned forward letting her head rest in her hands. "God I sounds so damn pathetic." She just shook her head at what he said, "I mean yeah he is part of it, but it is just opening my eyes to more things I could lose. And I don't know what to do about it."
Cyrus
Cyrus listened to her ramble, letting her talk and sat there, taking things in before he saw her rest her head in her hands. "Naw not really." He leaned back onto the table as he glanced down at her and rested on his elbows. "Its apart of life, we lose people, people change, people grow apart. There's nothing in our power to stop it from happening. We're only teenagers who are struggling to figure out who we are in life. You can't keep on shutting people out, Claire or stop yourself from opening from people." He paused a bit. "Ima ask you a question and I want you to answer honestly, are you still in love with him? Did something happened between you two at prom?"
Claire
Claire listened to him and took his words in, knowing he was right, he always was. Especially when it came to how she would respond to people and accept them or push them away. She was ready to respond to him when all of a sudden he brought up Sam. This caused her to open her mouth then pause for a moment before continuing. "I...I did love him. I loved the times we spent together. But that is all in the past and it must be for a reason right? If things were meant to work out they would have." She paused again before continuing. "So currently do I love him? No I just miss the past I guess." Claire sat back up thinking about prom, "No nothing happened, we shared a dance and he went back to enjoying the rest of the night with his date. And I think that was probably for the best."
Cyrus
Cyrus paused for a bit, to let the information sink in and turned his body towards her. "Why's that? Is it because something happened between the two of you at some point? I mean, I saw you two talking and I saw the Instagram picture that Julia posted of Sam, then you texted me about coming with you to clear your head. Its understandable that you have feelings for him and its okay." He paused a bit and licked his lips. "You're not going to like what Im going to say, but I gotta say it. Maybe there's a part of you who misses being with him and still loves him and thats what you're scared of. You dont want to accept that reality."
Claire
Claire took a breath, "Well yes something happened before prom, I opened up and told him how sorry I was for everything after going out with Jesse. I drank too much and he came to get me. We kissed but that is it, we both knew that we weren't thinking." Another breath leaving her lips after she confessed her actions from that evening. She still wasn't able to met his eyes when he turned towards her, especially at what he said next. "I don't like it...thats true and I thought of the same thing. Thought that I would have to be able to accept that. But...if I really cared about him and missed him..." Claire paused not knowing how she should say what she was going to say next. "I just don't think I would have ended up at your door the other night and let the night go where it went. I would have tried to confront him and tell him how I feel. But I didn't...I wanted him to enjoy himself and be happy."
Cyrus
Cyrus looked at her as she spoke and swallowed as he glanced down at his shoes before he glanced at her. He let silence fall in between them, scratched the back of his head. "Wow." He said softly after a while. "I think you need to confront him about everything, because you need to tell him what you told me and I think that we need to push pause on whatever we're doing. It would be for the best, really. 'Cause its not fair to me, its not fair for you, as of right now while you're dealing with the situation between Sam & you."(edited)
Claire
Claire knew what kind of information she dropped between the two of them but it was bound to come out at some point. It had to come out for her sanity at this point. She knew it would take a moment for him to respond but it was like a breathe of relief left her when he finally said something. All she could manage at the moment was to nod at him knowing he was right. But soon she was finally able to muster up words for him, "You make it all sound so easy, Cy...." She ran her finger through her hair again, moving it all to one side. "But you are right, right about everything. Like you always are somehow." She glanced over at him sighing softly. "Can I just say I am sorry about all of this? I didn't mean to make things more confusing. Even though I do a good job at it."
Cyrus
Cyrus just shrugged at her words, not having anything to say at the moment. "Its cool and it happens, its ok." He replied as he looked around and not at her, knowing that he felt hurt but knew it was coming eventually. "I knew it was going to happen, hence why Ive been distancing myself from you on top of being busy. Im glad that you told me though before we actually continued to figure out what the hell is going on between us or it would've hurt a lot worse."
Claire
"Hurt?" Claire said feeling her heart fall for a moment before looking back off at the park in front of him. "I never meant for that to happen. You are the last person I wanted to make feel that way." She played with her hands for a moment before taking her keys out of her pocket. "But that is why you are right, we need to figure things out. And I need to fix my problems. I can't put them on other people. That isn't fair." Taking a breath before putting her confident face on and standing up. "I'll take you back to your place, I troubled you enough for one night..."
Cyrus
Cyrus looked at her. "It kinda hurts but Im glad that you told me about Sam & you. Really." He said before he shrugged. "It happens, its out of our control, really." He nodded as he agreed with her. "Make sure you're doing it for you, not for anyone else and we gotta figure things out on our own and exactly, its not." He watched her stand up and jumped down from the bench. "Alright." He brushed off any piece of wood that gotten on him and headed towards her car.
Claire
Claire nodded, "I know and maybe that is what I need more than anything, just to spend time with myself and figure out what I need and want. As long as you know that I didn't mean for this all to happen." She let her arms cross over her chest as they headed to the car, keeping her eyes ahead. "I will, I need to at this point I am done feeling this all the time. So confused." When she reached the car she got in and waited for Cyrus to get in for her to start the car.
Cyrus
"I know you didnt." Cyrus replied as he rubbed her back in a comforting manner and gave her a small smile. He pulled his head up, slid his hands into his pockets and slipped into the car. He leaned over and gave her a hug. "Its gonna be okay."
Claire
Claire finally felt a small smile grow on her lips when he rubbed her back. She glanced over at him, and met his eyes for a moment. She really wondered what she did to have such a helpful person like Cyrus in her life. Her body relaxed in his touch when he hugged her, she moved to hug him back. Taking a breath to hopefully compose herself and her thoughts. “Thank you, so much.”
Cyrus
Cyrus nodded. "No problem." He replied as he rubbed her back before he broke the hug between them shortly after.
Claire
Claire hoped he knew she meant thank you in more ways than one. Thank you for helping her open her eyes, for being there for her, and being open mind. And on top of all of this still being able to comfort her and tell her it will be okay. When they parted she smiled softly at him, even though her eyes were tired from lifting everything off her shoulders for him. She finally put the car in drive, “Let’s get home, we should at least try and get some rest for school tomorrow.”
Cyrus
Cyrus nodded as he agreed. He knew that this was the right thing to do and he wanted her to be happy, he wanted everyone to be happy. "Yeah, we should." He agreed, trying to figure out what was going to happen next but all he had to do is trust he would. He buckled up, relaxed against the seat
Notes: Kitty finds out Sam hasn’t been completely honest about how he spent his week. Things get out of hand.
Trigger Warning: none
Sam
It had been almost a week since the disaster happened and Sam couldn't believe he was still on his feet. Sometimes days went by like in a dream, a constant blur of things happening all at once: finding a good organization for everyday life, going with Dad to sell stuff and get money, finding a small job, studying, taking care of the twins while his parents were away. All of that and telling his girlfriend a good enough story so that she didn't know about the bank taking his house. He kept telling himself that it wasn't the case to keep it a secret, not with her, not with everything they had told each other, and at the same time- how in the world was he gonna explain it? Hey, remember when I disappeared for half a week? It was because we woke up with some guys from the bank knocking at our door to take it back. Nice, huh? As if he wasn't enough of a weird individual already. Your dyslexic, homeless, glee club boyfriend, what-a-catch.
Still, he couldn't wait to see her after so many days. As rushed as it seemed, feelings had been pile up for some time now, so much that the thought of actually telling her started to form in his mind. Something big like the L word needed the proper moment, not some blurb in a text or something. All the bad thoughts, worrying about the money and his current situation, went away when he saw Kitty coming out of the front door. He raised his hand and waited for her to approach him. With a gaze towards the windows, just to check if her dad was behind the curtains to spy on her, he smiled to her. "The girl from all those text has a face again, a pretty one too." Taking her hand, he nodded towards the road ahead of them. "Can we get away from here so I can kiss you without your dad gettin' his bisturi, my beautiful Queen?"12 dicembre 2017
Kitty
Kitty was so glad to finally see Sam and pretending that almost a week apart didn’t happen. Seeing him smiling again, being able to put her arms around his ribs feeling as his hold tightened around her, reaching up to him to give a quick perk on those lips she missed so badly, looking at those green eyes she could stare at forever made her happy again-which was the feeling she started going used to dating Sam Evans. Maybe it wasn't the brightest idea to stay so close to each other with her dad not leaving for work yet, but for a moment world outside just stopped like in that fantasy in her head where was only Sam and their deserted island without any problems on the way. Problems that didn't seem to give them a break even for a week, although they managed to solve them each time getting closer day by day, revealing each other secrets kitty never thought she would tell anyone about. There was one new problem bugging kitty, but she trusted her boyfriend knowing he'll give her the best explanation as seemed like he always had one for whatever was worrying her at the moment
In any other day Kitty would just take boy's hand to go together at school, but that day it just didn't felt close enough after so much time apart-although it was only a calendar week at most, it felt like they didn't see each other for way too long. Girl's arm got it's way around her boyfriend waist as soon as they got from the way of her dad being able to see them as her head rested on boy's chest-she felt so safe with Sam around; always saying she doesn't need anyone's protection and really being able to stand up for herself, for the first time she didn't need to do it-she knew Sam would protect her and no one will ever hurt her again. Those two little thought worms-about Sam accidentally dropping L word and about Spencer seeing him entering some house with a pizza when he was supposed to be sick at home vanished from her head as soon as their lips touched. They kissed a lot during their relationship but for some reason this one felt even more special - maybe because they missed each other so badly, maybe because as other things, Sam made it with love, but this one stood along, being one of the kisses that will be remembered.
Sam
Explain what Sam felt the moment that Kitty was in front of him was impossible. His heart skipped a beat and at the same time his chest felt a lot lighter, bring a smile to his lips and the urge to hold her again. He gladly let the girl take him away from her dad's sight and quickly stopped her to hug her. Holding the girl had the effect of making all the problems fade, just a white noise in the background. She didn't know anything, and yet it felt like she was some sort of an anchor even like that, a bastion of normalcy in the crazy blur that he had around. It had to be what distinguished having a crush from loving someone: having a special person by your side that made you stronger and feel like every problem could be solved, that everything going offrail could go back on tracks, and that most of all filled your heart with the most beautiful emotions. That was why he had to tell Kitty, and why keep lying to her wasn't going to help his relationship take the direction he wanted it to take.It was going to happen that day, he decided to himself, tightening his grip around his girlfriend as he swayed a bit on they same spot they'd been here for a couple of minutes. It seemed like he wasn't giving it that much of a thought, that was true, but it wasn't like other things had waited to crash down on him, so at least the happy, beautiful things and people he still had around could get the recognition they deserved. Grand gestures, that's what his mind kept telling him, and if he could he would've even serenaded her with a song in the middle of the school, but that wasn't something like them. Another thought came to mind, something that could close the circle with how they started, or one of their starting points. There was still time to plan the romantic moment, that one was the reunion he'd been waiting for and that brought him out of the bed earlier than he was supposed to, that morning. His gaze studied her face for what must have been a second, not long enough to take in those features he really could draw with his eyes closed, and still enough to lean in. Sam got lost in the kiss, his hands cupping her face to stroke her cheekbones, the nice, gentle curve of her jaw, appreciating every little detail about her. He pulled away slightly, not enough to leave her, and the smile already curving his lips got wider. "You're better than any medicine. I missed you so, so much."
Kitty
Although it wasn’t something she would agreed to say out louder but what happened to her as a child affected Kitty more than she’d like to admit. Not only going to the therapist for a while after, deep inside it was always hard for Kitty to trust boys and relax especially in the crowd. Her so called “friends” who stopped talking to her formed some sort of defending mechanism in her, attacking people first and never really trusting anyone cause if you don’t have a heart no one can break it. But Sam…that blond boy not only made her feel like none of this nightmare ever happened, he became her safest place and her rock and source of strength at the same time - Kitty not only felt like living again, she found out she still had a heart which belonged to that boy who not only inspired her and taught her to believe in herself - something that he failed terribly himself - and also made her a better person daily, bringing all light feelings in her heart, even ones she didn’t believe she could felt again - trust, hope and joy. Growing up too soon, Kitty felt that Sam was the other part of the puzzle, balancing her good and bad traits and sharing how not to lose your inner child by his own example.“Reunited and it feels so good.” - slight smirk touched Kitty’s lips before girl raised on her tiptoes to kiss Sam again. It was about time to hurry for a school and while all Kitty wanted is to skip it spending her well deserved private time with Sam, she knew it would be hard for Sam to catch up with studying, so girl decided to do something she never did before - putting others needs before her; Kitty wasn’t about to magically change into a nice person, but she found that caring and love in her heart that helped her being nice about Sam. “We should hurry babe but maybe if you have a little break today, we can skip to the astronomy class...i bet you imagined it many times.” Kitty gave a quick look at their hands holding as their fingers intertwined and smiled to it “Have I told you about my boyfriend who makes mornings way better?”15 dicembre 2017
Sam
While the two of them were away, Sam had the chance to put another piece in the whole Kitty Wilde picture. It was crazy how the two of them got closer in such a little time, so much that the girl felt comfortable enough to talk about having no friends in her old school. Something he really didn't expect could be true, considering how popular she was. He wondered what those so-called "friends" could have told about her to make all other people to ignore her completely, if that was the reason why she was so weary of him at first not to trust that he wanted to be just friends -okay, maybe not completely, that was true. He couldn't think of her as a lonely person, especially with her being so good at fiercely defending the people she cared for. It was something almost impossible to see at first, but she was now showing that side more and more as time passed, though it was the last thing she wanted to admit. Sam cherished every little hue of that complex yet beautiful person that was his girlfriend. Girlfriend, he though, a gaze of awe. How could he have been so lucky to get the girl?"Too good to be true." Replying to the kiss, he then went pinching his own cheek with a playful smile. "Are we sure this is reality and I'm not dreaming? For real, pinch me please, this could be some Inception kinda thing and I don't wanna risk it." But that was the real world, that he knew, and very well. It easily could've been the worst to live in, if it wasn't for few exceptions that made every circumstance more tolerable. Kitty was his exception: merely holding her hand made him feel better, living in a small bubble of hope. The two of them started walking down the street, their fingers intertwined and big smiles. Her suggestion made his heart race a little bit faster, sometimes it was as if she could read his mind. A nod and a small grin, he nodded. "So many times you could direct a movie on that," leaning in to leave a kiss on her cheek, he pulled away and kept walking. "I was thinkin' the same, I wanna tell you something. Let's meet after our second period in astronomy class, we need a bit of time for ourselves." ANd to tell you how I feel about you and us, he kept himself from saying that, not ruining the mood for once that he could contain his impulsiveness. Leaning to meet her shoulder, he tried to catch a glimpse of her gaze. "What do you say?"
Kitty
Some people surely saw the world as some black and white place - Kitty herself spent the majority of her life thinking it’s a dark one once with only faith in God holding her from bad things happening to her, like something worse than being a molested kid could happen. Even teen’s parents thought she’s too negative for her age not expecting their kid to turn into a grinning girl, who started noticing good in people, who grew as a person trying to be a better girlfriend for Sam cause old Kitty would leave after one of his so-called confessions, breathing fully for the first time she could recall the feeling. Kitty’s hand playfully pulled Sam’s soft locks from side to side “Does it feel real, lemonhead?Am I feel real?” Her cheeks blushed a bit as she felt Sam kissing her so tenderly so caring and she nodded to his plans agreeing on meeting in astronomy class so they can be alone. “Sometimes I wish you’d be left for one more year so we can go the same classes”, Kitty placed her arm on a boy’s neck to bring him down closer to her where she could leave him “have a nice day” quick perk on the lips before the two of them went their separate ways to classes.Few hours after Kitty made her way to the cafeteria, slowly pushing people out of her way, when Phil ran to her stopping girl for a second “What the h--”, she almost finished the sentences when she suddenly froze up when she saw Sam’s watch in his hands as he was giving it to her. “Hey Kitty so Evans forgot it at the practice few days ago and I can’t find him, you two are dating right? So you’re gonna see him sooner than me anyway. Thanks!” Kitty stand there numb not moving just staring in the distance not paying even a bit of attention to the crowd in the hall. So, few days ago Sam told her they can’t see each other because he’s sick and it’s too dangerous cause he worries for her and went to the practice instead. Not being chosen over football sucks, but the second thought made her stomach sick - those Spencer’s words about Sam coming in some girl’s house with a pizza almost at midnight; Kitty shook them off at first thinking there must be some explanation for this and yet Kitty knew Spence would never lie to her. Those two facts together made Sam a cheater and a liar who broke her trust. There might be some mistake, it must be. Just not her Sam, not him. “Meet me in the astronomy class asap” she typed quickly rushing to the class - if there’s just another betrayal in her life, she wanted to clarify it.
Sam
Getting to be that playful with the person he loved, that was the best thing about being reunited with Kitty. There was still a lingering question in the back of his head, a constant how will she react to the news, even though no one was more understanding with her, he could tell that from experience. And still, it required some seriousness, right? He couldn't bring himself to change topic in that moment and scrunched up his nose at her playful question. "Ouch, try not to leave me bald while you're at it. That'd be way too real," he joked. "Wouldn't you get tired of seeing me everywhere? I know I wouldn't, in fact nothing would make me happier. Just in case I have to skip a year to be with you all the time." That was true, though, the walk from her house to school wasn't nearly enough to be satisfied, not after all those days. His reaction to the cute pulling down to reach her was a small laugh on her lips as he kissed her back. "Have a nice day, be awesome as usual, my small and cute girlfriend." He left before she could tell him that it was mean to tell her again and went to class.Day went by slowly. Not slowly like in a motel room, listening to other people's business through the thin walls they had, but slowly enough to rest his head on the desk and listen to the teacher with a blank stare directed at them. History class was the worst in general, so much words, so many dates, so many events to remember and not nearly enough interest in that moment to even try and look at the blackboard. It was an amazing chance to space out and think about the perfect song to go with such a confession. It struck him the fact that there wasn't gonna be his guitar with him for such a big moment, but he could lend one from the band - that meant begging the guy until he gave up and lend the instrument to him. There were three songs that could've been perfect for the purpose. Sure, rehearsing it would've been better, but the improvisation of it all was romantic too, right? When bell rang he shot up from his seat, suddenly awakened by the end of the boring class and started walking towards the cafeteria. A notification on his phone made him frown, thinking it was something that had to do with his family, but he sighed in relief when he saw it was from Kitty, who asked him to go to astronomy class. And earlier than he thought. He quickly typed a "As you wish :)" and went to the opposite direction. The hallway outside of astronomy class was less crowded than other areas of the school, , which was a point on favor of privacy. He got into the classroom with a big smile. "Hey beautiful girlfriend."20 dicembre 2017
Kitty
Small smile formed on her lips when Sam warned her about not pulling his hair too much, it was so cute yet ridiculous how worried he was about going bald with age. “Don’t worry I like your hair too much to get rid of it in such a mean and painful way”. Sam’s question came out of nowhere and Kitty frowned a bit hearing how Sam thinks low of himself once again despite all those times she was trying to prove him she sees him differently. Even the idea of getting tired of Sam seemed insane - she never felt as good as during last month with Sam. His unconditional love, support, kindness and the way he saw her made her question if it’s all real sometimes and despite being almost opposites of each other, sometimes he fit her as the missing part of the puzzle “Of course I won’t get tired you dork. My lifeplan includes seeing you everywhere, mostly around me.” There won’t be the need to clarify it with anyone else, but Sam was crazy for her enough to perform a stupid romantic move, “...just to be clear, I don’t want you to fail your exams to stay with me for one more year, okay? I know you’d sew our skins to each other if you could, but fortunately it’s 21st century and planes exist so we’ll see each other even after your graduation”Minutes passed without her even noticing as she kept moving Sam’s watch in her hand. Even in her worst thoughts she didn’t met that scenario - years ago Kitty thought the worst thing in her life happened already and girl made sure no one could hurt her again, building a wall around her and attacking people with her vicious words first. But Sam made her weak, made her soft and vulnerable, teaching her how to trust again and how to let someone in, Kitty was so biased by them being together that didn’t noticed bad rings - Sam avoiding meeting her last moments, Sam saying he can’t perform with her and even leaving her on read once. Now it all formed into once big picture - Kitty thought once she’d hear that she’s cheated on, she’d go cry or get hurt immediately but instead everything went blurry and surreal, she was staying there numb without feeling that it’s happening to her, it all felt as she was separated from her body and observed everything from aside, she didn’t even noticed Sam entered the room at first. “Not anymore” - she softly commented on the g-word before raising up to Sam to lend him a watch “I guess it’s yours.” Seeing frustration on his face, she raised from the desk, making a step from him. “I remember you told me I’m many things, Sam, but I never thought I would be a fool and someone who’s cheated on. First pizza to that girl’s house, now apparently you were all around the city avoiding me. You made everything not to be with me last week and I’ll save you some time thinking of new lies - you don’t have to find new excuses anymore. We’re over”. She saw Sam rushed to her obviously to change her mind, but she knew if she only stays for one more second, she’ll start crying and crying in front of him was too much. “Don’t! Or I’ll call Spencer” Cutting off her last words, she closed the door of the class, hurrying to get out of the school feeling as she can’t breath.(modificato)23 dicembre 2017
Sam
All he had done that week, while alone at the motel to take care of his siblings, was fantasizing of a perfect little life with the girl he was with. Something way more different than the present he was living in, something nice and yes, maybe not always easy as a stroll in the park, but as long as they were going to be together, everything was gonna be fine, even without planning every single detail on HOW things were going to happen. Important thing was that they could go through difficult times hand in hand, and for that to happen he had to make the big step of saying the L word.It was the moment he saw Kitty's face that he knew something wasn't quite right and the change of buzz could be easily felt even before she opened her mouth to reply to him. Not quite what he had expected. Sam furrowed his brows and took a step forward after closing the door behind his back, worried that something had happened to the girl to react that way. She was lending him something and his hand immediately went up to brush his fingers against hers, to find some explanation, but none was needed: his watch was there to remind him of what had happened last week and how badly he had reacted to the bad news. His face went pale as words struggled to come up, any explanation that would've made it less awful than what Kitty was depicting as cheating. "No, no, no," he said, taking another step forward. Seeing her getting back was like getting his heart ripped out of his chest. "That's not- that's not how it went. Please let me explain- Kitty!" Too fast, she got away almost running. It didn't take more than half a second to follow her down the hallway, to find her and explain everything as he should've done. Bell rang. More students got in the way and right when he got a glimpse of her blonde ponytail disappearing around a corner, he felt the grip of Rachel on his hand. "Sam, I've been looking for you everywhere. We still have to work on the setlist for-" words filled his mind, but not Rachel's. What Kitty had told him and the fact that she actually believed she could do that. He realized how strong his grip was around the watch, as a reminder of how fast things crumbled in front of his eyes.
