ph-1 (Park Junwon/Harry Park) x Idol!Reader
Summary: There's something so special in knowing that this introverted man went out of his own comfort zone to make me comfortable.
Word Count: 1k+
Warning: mentions and mildly graphic depictions of panic attack/mental breakdown, fluff, slightly crack-ish, typos etc.
A/N: i love ph-1. Also this fic is based on what happened to me once I was so friggin scared to miss work or be late, but I wasnt even late yet T_T
It was pretty instantaneous when it happened. The absolute fear and feeling of stupidity running up my spine and neck. It came all at once. It was horrible. First, I was dazed like one as one blinks into wake, but then, my body was up and so was my heart rate.
When I had opened my eyes, the TV was already turned off.
Oops, I fell asleep.
Sorry Harry...
These were my initial thoughts.
I looked to the rest of the couch I was on and see, well, he wasn’t there. The rest of the couch had my legs on it and my legs had a blanket covering it. My back was on the arm rest and my neck had a pillow behind it. Either I did this in my sleep or I was moved; you be the judge.
The lights were closed. There was a slight misty chill in the air. Then I saw it.
I turned over my shoulder and found the window. The sky was a bright shade of orange and red. Is that...
Holy shit, I slept through the night.
I literally ripped the blanket off me and felt my breath hitch as I scrambled for my things. I roughly wiped my face back as a whine left my lips. I had so much to do today. So many things to do with so many people waiting for me to do it.
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I should have been in the studio at 6.
I feel tears form in my eyes as I found all my things scattered by a cabinet near the bathroom’s door. I shove the objects that found its way out of my bag back in and fish for my phone.
I suddenly realize that I was probably alone in the apartment because Junwon had already left. I begin to chew my lower lip in agitation, muttering softly, “why the fuck didn’t he wake me up?”
I roughly scratch my tears away as I find my phone.
My heart dropped when my phone screen stayed black. I start slamming my head with my palm. My phone fucking died?!
I will it to open as I harshly pressed on the buttons on the side. I continuously cuss as the phone chimes open. I mentally debated plunging it against the far off wall in front of me.
My heart skips when I hear a flush sound. I watch dumbly as the door opens and light closes behind a Harry-caught-in-headlights.
“Are you o--”
“Why did you let me sleep through the night?”
He knits his brows and watches me. In confusion, he mutters, “what?”
“I have so much to do today! My phone friggin died on me and, gosh, I must have so many missed calls.”
“But you said we could hang out today...”
“I did! But not until the next day!”
He assesses my expression as he watches me fumble with my phone. His aloof and naïve expression just angers me. How could he not get it?
I just grab my bag and begin to head for the door, “I have to go.” I stop at the door and work his locks. That’s when something clicks in Harry’s head.
I was already out when he comes up to me and places a hand on my shoulder, “wait! You didn’t sleep throughout the night.”
I look over to him as he quickly runs back in. In the few moments I was staring at the hallway of his apartment, I felt my stomach boiling in agitation. He quickly runs back and shows me his phone, “see, it’s still 6:50. It’s the same day. It’s Tuesday.”
It took a little longer for this information to register into my head, but when it did, my shoulders relaxed, not that I even knew I was so tense, and I let out a sigh of relief, not that I was actually relieved. I mean I was, but I was actually feeling more like a really big idiot.
I placed my hands on my face when I felt tears gush down. “I friggin thought it was the next day.” I let out deep breath.
Harry watches me with a sympathetic look on his face.
He then moves in to give me a hug.
I however was not having it. Mostly because I was caught off guard and feel icky when people hug me. Not that I hated hugs either. I just... grew up always dealing with my problems on my own, and now I feel like a wimp who is undeserving of comfort when I'm breaking down.
I really didn’t mean to shove him off as hard as I did. I didn’t. He sure looked shocked when I did it though. When I was faced with the aftermath of what I had done, I instantly regret it and felt 10x more idiotic.
“I...” I sniffle and wipe my philtrum, “I’m sorry. I-”
“It’s okay, I caught you-”
“No, it’s me. I just... I’m usually the one giving the hugs. I... I should go.”
He looks shocked at my words. “No! Geez,” he comes up in front of me, “please just come back inside.”
I squint tightly and breath out, “I’m kind of having a mental breakdown-”
“Which is why you should come back in.” He raises his hands and leads me in, “please. I’ll drive you home later, I promise.”
“Junwon-”
“Please, I can’t have you leave my house like this.”
My inner voice was screaming to just jump out of the window. It felt like a nice idea, but like the rest of its ideas, I muted it out and decided to plead my case to my judge, “please, I don’t want to-”
“You can have a moment in my bedroom by yourself. Just please, stay okay, even just for a little while.”
Fine.
My chances with him were ruined anyway. I spent, what, about 4 hangouts with the dude, I’m pretty sure they weren’t even dates yet, and now I’ve completely malfunctioned in front of him. There is absolutely no way I can face him again after this. I might as well do him this courtesy, for him and me.
So, I went back inside and hid in his bedroom.
I sat on the floor and cried at the end of his bedsheets.
My chest hurt.
And I felt all in all suckish
“Hey... It’s been 20 minutes.”
I think my dry throat would agree, although I would rather stay here for eternity.
He knocks on the door and I mash my face into his blanket.
He opens the door and looks at me. He walks over and whispers, “hey, it’s all good.”
I feel like crying again. I turn my face to the side and say, “no it’s not.” I feel tears pool by my nose bridge.
“This is just like peeing in a swimming pool, you just got to walk it off.”
I blink and lift my head, turning to him as he looks down on me with a soft gaze, “what?”
“You gotta get up.”
“... that makes no sense.”
He reaches a hand out to me, “a lot of things in life don’t. Sometimes you look at a sunset and think it’s a sunrise and that’s fine. It’s a little confusing but it’s a part of life.”
I take his hand when he starts making sense. I dumb it back down though, “at least if I pee in a pool, no one will know.”
He hums, “someone will always know, but you just gotta walk it off.”
I look at him after I stand, “that’s still disgusting.”
“Well,” we pull away, “you shouldn’t pee in a pool.”
“... I shouldn’t have cr-”
“Nope, it’s not an analogy. Just... what you felt was scary, it’s okay to cry when you’re scared.” He takes my hand and leads me out, “I meant not to make sense... I thought it would make you laugh.”
We walk back out and make it to his kitchen. The two seater table was set with some Mexican food. He looks at me and says, “I heat it up for you.”
I frown, “you shouldn’t have.”
“I should. I bought it before you woke up. It’s kinda gross when it’s cold.”
I feel even worse, “sorry.”
“Hey, just...” he places a hand on my shoulders and gives me a look. I don’t meet his gaze and blink rapidly as I turn to my feet. A moment passes and he speaks up again, “I’ll get you some water.”
I sat down on one of the chairs as he pours me drink. He then sits down in front of me and motions to the food. “It’s good, I promise.”
I look to my plate and feel like resting my head on the quesadilla. Maybe I can get a cheese facial in the process.
He licks his lips and releases a soft breath. He then drags his chair and moves his plate close to mine. He begins to work on my plate, and cuts up my burrito with a spoon meant for the salsa. He vigorously works on it, raising a brow at his opponent before ultimately getting a knife and fork.
I watch as he pokes it with four prongs, “are you actually cutting burrito?”
“Yes, well, I gotta make sure you have no choice but to eat it cos I worked so hard on it.”
I notice the corner of his lips faintly curve upward.
I frown.
He turns to me and catches this, “do I make you cry?”
I fist my hand and scratch my eyes, “no.”
“Do you want a hug?”
“No.”
“I think you do though.”
“Please don’t hug me.”
“... I want a hug though...”
“...”
“Can you hug me cause I need one?”
I pull my hands away and find his apprehensive expression. I let out a breath. He takes that as a yes and gives me a hug. He stands from his seat and envelopes me in his arms. I don’t move but I do close my eyes and breath in his scent. He smells like one of those cute med boys when I was in uni. He smells nice. He feels... safe. This feels safe.
“I’m sorry,” he suddenly whispers.
I raise my hands and wrap them around him. I then stand and we reposition our embrace, “no... I do want a hug.” He secures his arms by my shoulders and I secure mine on his torso. He rests his cheek on my head and rubs my hair.
For a moment, we just stand there in each others arms. I feel warm with my head on his chest.
“Ripson nubus.”
“... ... did you... just speak simlish?”
“I did.”
“...”
“If we were in the sims, you would probably be happy because of how much I’m trying to make you less sad.”
“Oh to be a sim.”
“Yeah...” he rubs my head, “is it working though.”
“Mmm, well, I kinda want to eat that burrito now so you won’t have to put it back in the microwave. I don’t want the responsibility of becoming a Spiderman.”
“Right, we should,” he tries to break away, but I stop him. I pipe up softly, “just a few more seconds.”
His arms tighten around me, “a few more seconds is good.”
ph-1 (Park Junwon/Harry Park) x Idol!Reader
Summary: When you’re in a relationship, there are aspects of being single you tend to look over or take for granted. It’s sometimes those things that cause a rift between you and your lover.
Word Count: 1k+
Warnings: Fluff, established relationship, lowkey jealousy, kinda a social media au, typos as I have not proofread this, i use y/n 🤢 , etc.
A/N: i hope you see this nonnie and I hope you like it!
It was like a snowball rolling down a snowy mountain. By the time it got down to the slope, it was an enormous boulder, an avalanche. That’s what it felt like on this one lunch date.
It was like a hundred little things came crashing down on us. Things like forgetting to call back, not replying soon enough if replying at all, arriving late, forgetting to heat up lunch, forgetting it’s their turn to buy, all came crashing down when we got the wrong order at the café.
And although it was neither mine nor Junwon’s fault but actually an employee’s error, we had already snapped at each other in the middle of it and found it exhausting to talk to each other. It made my stomach ache after eating.
It would have been fine, had I not had anything to do after our lunch, but unfortunately, I had a long schedule ahead of me that day, and it made me irritable. Thankfully, after a while, my stomach was pacified, but the same could not be said for me and Junwon.
The entire day, we had not talked, nor the day after that, which made it the day after that feel like it was hanging up in the air because we had a special date planned and yet we still hadn’t broken the silence.
Oh well, if he’s gonna be petty about it, I can play petty.
Now I know you’re going to ask, why not just be the bigger person and text him or something. Well, maybe if I was the one that snapped first I would have. Maybe if I was the one who didn’t even bother telling how he felt then maybe I would have been more inclined to break the silence.
Junwon has never been the confrontational type, so if there was something on his mind, he usually just let it slide.
And if something really bothered me, I would tell him.
So the little things that got on his nerves that didn’t bother me began to bother me when he made a fuss about in in the wrong time.
He can take a hint; I’ll make him take a hint.
INSTAGRAM STORY
<14:15> ootd [boomerang attatched]
<14:16> gotta keep my eye out for (ph-2) 🤮
<14:17> If you feel like your problems are big, remember we’re just a tiny speck in the universe.
I was already in the planetarium when I shared this. It was supposed to be a special date, but I was now here alone. It was good we had already split our tickets, or else I would have had to buy another ticker for myself.
I arrived to the place a little earlier than when we would have gone, and was in awe of the place. I have always been so fascinated with the heavenly bodies. I love the stars so much and find joy in knowing we both are made of star dust and shine like them, albeit 1000x lower than the eye can see.
I was having fun for about the first 5-10 minutes of my time here, until I saw something, stopped, and thought, ‘I have to show Harry’. It all kind of went downhill from there.
The place was beautiful and distracting, but It was pretty hard to enjoy myself, when all my thoughts began to be, Harry would like this, OMG Harry would find this so pretty, this is what I was telling Harry, and the classic, it’d be more fun if Harry were here.
Shut up, I am not a simp.
I’m just... lonely.
INSTAGRAM STORY
<14:34> So many stars
<14:36> Missing You by BTOB
<14:36> where is homenobody when you need him? 😤
<14:37> kinda want coffee too
At this point, I was starting to lose interest in the place as my thought began to get geared so hard into just wanting to call Harry and make up. I think that was why I began to just walk around aimlessly.
That was also why I was taken aback when someone tapped my shoulder, since I was pretty out of it.
I turned around and saw this dude smile at me, “hi.”
I raised my brows and gave a soft smile. This might not end well.
“I, uh, couldn’t help but notice you when you walked in. You look absolutely stunning.”
I chuckle and shake my head, “uh, thank you.”
He nods and places his hand in his pockets, “no yeah, the pleasure’s all mine. I also noticed you weren’t really here with anyone and neither am I, so would you maybe want to tour the rest of the place with me?”
“Eh, actually, I had this day planned out with someone,” I pull my phone up and continue, “I’m about to check up on them right now.”
“Ahh,” he nods, “well, I can keep you company while your friend isn’t here.”
“No, she’s good,” another voice speaks. I am suddenly in Harry’s arms as he throws an arm over my shoulder. He turns to the dude, “her boyfriend’s here now.”
The dude smacks his lips then nods slowly, “okay then. Nice talking to you, babe.”
Junwon throws the guy a look as he walks away, “did that dude really just call you babe?”
I pull him into an embrace, “huhuhu, I should have called you sooner.”
He sighs against me and places his cheek on my head, “I should have called sooner too.”
“Yeah, you really should have.”
I feel the vibrations against my face when he chuckles, “yeah.”
I tighten my arms around him and sigh, “you smell nice.” I pull away and pout, “I’m glad you’re here.”
He gives me a quick kiss on the lips, “me too. I kept getting @-ed by your fans. I was so close to being cancelled.”
I snort. He smiles, “I was checking your stories anyway though, so I knew you were being petty about it.”
I make a face, “you’re talking like you weren’t being petty.”
He pulls me back into his arms and sucks in a breath, “I’m still kinda ticked off on how slow you reply though.”
I chuckle against him and push him off, grabbing his hand, “I’ll reply even slower now!”
He rolls his eyes.
INSTAGRAM STORY
<14:50> [replying to <14:36> where is homenobody when you need him? 😤] Literally right here 🤢 everyone stop @-ing me
