This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
Announcement: Please Participate in the Citizen Census Survey!
By Lydia
All Citizens of the Hermit Citizen Hub are being counted in the Hermit Citizen Census! If you are a past or present participant of the Hermit Citizen Community, no matter how much or how little you have participated, we ask that you fill out one response per each of your Citizens (one survey response per character) in the Hermit Citizen Survey linked here:
Please fill out the information regarding your Citizen if you would like them to be included in the Citizen Census! Please answer these ques
If your Citizen does not have a Citizen I.D. Card, please create one and place it in a new post in the #Citizen-Information forum thread on the Hermit Citizen Hub Discord Server in addition to filling out this Survey.
This Survey asks for each Citizen’s name, species, age, height, pronouns, base location, occupation and included duties, Citizen affiliations, Hermit affiliations, and the names of any shops that are owned by each Citizen. Please answer each question to the best of your ability, and fear not if you do not have a definitive answer for each question. For example, if your Citizen does not have a base, you are more than welcome to state this as well.
We ask that you answer all of the questions OUT of character from the perspective of you as the creator, NOT as your character. For example, if your Citizen tells everyone that they are a human but they are really a shapeshifter, you should still state their species as “Shapeshifter” in the Survey. In addition, we ask that you keep each response separate for each Citizen you are referring to. For example, if you have created five Citizens, take the survey five times to ensure that all of your Citizens are accounted for accurately.
This Survey is imperative to ensuring that every Hermit Citizen is accounted for and that you can see your Citizen in the final Census. You and the Citizens you have made have crafted the history, lore, and livelihood of the Hermit Citizen world. Regardless of whether you have made a single Citizen and moved on, or if you are a daily voice in this community, the goal of this Census is to celebrate the inimitable creativity of each artist, writer, crafter, and builder who has participated in the Hermit Citizen Community.
Now onto other news below the cut!
Weekly Weather Report
By Lydia
Weather Forecast for the Hermit Citizen Hub, week of Wednesday, June 14th to Tuesday, June 20th.
Temperatures are written in Celsius Format.
Wednesday - Mostly Sunny. Temperatures range from 18 degrees to 25 degrees Celsius. Earthquakes may happen more frequently than usual near The Perimeter. Flight courses will be held at 1 PM around the large floating rocks.
Thursday - Sunny and warm. Temperatures range from 22 degrees to 31 degrees Celsius. Park rangers may appear sporadically to warn Citizens of potential wildfires developing across the Server throughout the month.
Friday - Downpours. Temperatures range from 8 degrees to 15 degrees Celsius. There is a small chance of these downpours turning to thunderstorms early in the morning. If this is the case, expect skies to clear up very quickly if Bdubs is in the area.
Saturday - Cloudy, foggy during the morning and afternoon. Temperatures range from 12 degrees to 17 degrees Celsius. Growling may be heard near both Cleo’s and Cub’s museums during the evening hours.
Sunday - Sunny and hot. A heat wave is expected. Temperatures range from 29 degrees to 34 degrees Celsius. Citizens are advised to stay hydrated and limit outside exercise. This is a great day to visit the beach. Whirlpools continue to appear occasionally, so take caution if you are planning on swimming.
Monday - Partly Cloudy. Heat continues, with temperatures ranging from 31 degrees to 39 degrees Celsius. All ice cream stands in Scarland will be half-priced. They will also open two hours earlier with an additional assortment of flavors. Dust devils may be seen in all desert areas from late morning into late afternoon.
Tuesday - Rainy. The heat wave is expected to end. Showers on and off are expected among clouds throughout the morning. Temperatures range from 19 degrees to 28 degrees Celsius. Flash floods are possible throughout the evening hours. Citizens are advised to take caution if they are traveling on foot.
Astrology Corner
Have you been feeling without guidance? Do you look at your birthday, look up your star sign, and wonder, “Is The Overseer in need of a checkup?” “Am I able to timetravel? ” Don’t worry, here at The Overseer, we can help you.*
Aries: You will find a series of messages in your room which will point to a podcast that was discontinued in 2014. In that, they discuss a missing person report, which in a later episode was resolved.
Taurus: You read a book on how Newspapers work and why people misuse paper clippings of newspapers.
Gemini: When you checked in on the singular Home Depot of the server, all the duct tape and rope were sold out. You then get to do an off-server trip to get that duct tape.
Cancer: You were watching your favorite documentary, “Why Hermits Do The Things Hermits Do” and it talked about how they were being a bit silly and to always forgive and forget. Forget What?
Leo: Your birthday is on the horizon, but try not to throw a party. Things may go deeply wrong and there’s nothing you will be able to do about it. Watch the magazine articles, they’ll be the only thing that can give you a clue. Do not let the moon see your work.
Virgo: You should be wary of Aquarius. They may seem harmless and always want to help but there have been a lot of articles revolving around them lately.
Libra: Bring popcorn to the Perimeter you will need it due to what is happening with Virgo and Aquarius.
Scorpio: You notice there’s a lot of tension between Virgo and Aquarius lately that no one seems to know the reason behind it. You may want to dig into it and find out what’s the matter before something explodes.
Sagittarius: Make sure to prepare the shelter, do not deny you don’t have it. You do.
Capricorn: You never knew the origin of your family, and maybe that was for the best. You should not look into it as that will not help your situation.
Aquarius: Don’t mind Virgo’s suspiciousness, there’s been a lot of rumours going around lately and they’re probably nervous. Maybe you should bake them something to calm their nerves!
Pisces: Somethings coming…
All star signs: Help.
*Ignore how blatantly specific these are. Nothing bad will happen to you.
All of the following items have been brought to The Overseer staff’s office for safekeeping until they are claimed. If you recognize one of these items as yours, please visit us to receive your items, or contact us at [email protected]*. Thank you!
*Not a real email address.
Item 1: A set of watercolor paintings all depicting builds from other servers.
These watercolor paintings measure approximately 16 x 20 inches each, all featuring various structures built by the participants of our server. Each of these paintings has a thin black frame. The bases depicted include the following:
A large, whimsical house with a heavily detailed interior, basement, and bright roof next to a custom-built copper tree, created by Redfeather.
A cozy medium-sized tree house with pink doors and dark wood framing nestled among several cherry trees, made by Sami Bear.
A sturdy iron farm built in the desert with red decor and two massive turrets, made by Okami.
A tall wizard’s tower with stained-glass windows, several complementary textures, a full telescope, bookshelves from floor to ceiling and a spiral staircase inside, and conical roofs, located in a spooky forest, created by Redfeather.
A spacious section of a village featuring a large family home built from stone and wood and three-row houses, perfect for any roaming travelers to settle down, created by Roo.
If these paintings are yours, by all means, continue painting after you have picked these up, as your skills are quite remarkable!
Item 2: 50 Assorted origami dragons.
Small enough to fit into the palm of your hand, these dragons were made from paper of every color you can imagine, with each fold carefully placed to give these miniature depictions a reflection of fine-tuned craftsmanship. These dragons include Albanian bollas, Slavic dragons, wyverns, sea dragons, and cockatrices. If these dragons are yours, we admire the patience it must have taken to design such a wonderful collection!
Item 3: A wood carving sculpture in the shape of a 500-type rotary telephone.
This sculpture is about the size of a real rotary telephone, painted in pink and cyan. Due to the medium used, a telephone coil was created from aluminum craft wire to connect its two pieces. The creator of the sculpture has somehow made it possible to dial the numbers, and static plays through the holes depicting the phone’s speakers.
Item 4: A series of journal notes written in black ink with a calligraphy pen.
These journal pages appear to be ripped out of a book and have yellowed with age. The writing speaks of several events of someone’s journey through various servers before making their way to Hermitcraft. While some of the writing is difficult to read, we can parse that the person writing them was on the run from an overarching being and was not certain that they would survive much longer due to the number of hunters chasing them down.
Item 5: Several yards of fabric of many colors and patterns.
These fabrics come in gold, blue, green, purple, and red, and depict patterns of polka dots, stripes, small butterflies, paisley, loops, confetti, and leaves. The fabrics that do not depict any patterns at all include chiffon, velvet, polyester, and crepe. No sewing tools were found with this assortment. A set of notes regarding a costume design were found with the fabrics, noting specific details about which ones are to be used and how.
ADVERTISEMENTS
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Get ready for the biggest party of the social season! On next Sunday, the 24th, The Garden Masquerade will finally open in the Astral Library. The event is going to last a week, so there’s no need to rush, but try not to stay in the ballroom the whole time.
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Psst, hey you. Yeah, the one reading this. Are you an Avian? Y’know, one of the people with the flap flaps that can’t see glass panes? Ye, we have a place for you to not feel judged and will always be supported. The Birdhouse is always open for fellow Avians to come hang out.
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Break out your pumpkin heads for this week’s Garden Club meeting! We’re going on a trip to The End to help out the Grian Affiliates within our group. Their adopted dragons could use a trip home.
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Are you worried about one of the Hermits judging your build? Worried about not meeting some kind of secret standard or code? Well don’t worry! The SSS is here to help you! We’ll make sure that your base is secure, and if there’s nothing wrong with it we’ll fight for your sake.
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Fun and Games
This week's fun and games are brought to you by Azure and Snuffy
This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
As the newspaper settles into a rhythm, you may find yourself thinking, "What comes next? You've conquered the Hermitcitizen Hub, you've nearly conquered Tumblr–so what will the newspaper do now?" Now, it's unlikely you're thinking this, but the newspaper staff has been thinking this, and rather than doing something drastic and stupid, we've decided to expand.
Yes, expand.
Where to, you might wonder?
None other than the archenemy, the place of limited characters, the worst place on the internet.
Yes, we're talking about Twitter.
“WHY,” you may be wondering. “Why on earth would this place, of all places, be the spot to expand to?”
If we're going to be fully honest, it's because someone proposed it and we couldn't come up with a good reason not to. If you ignore the immense numbers of CC's hiding in the corners, it's perfectly safe for a little fan–made newspaper like us.
While Tumblr has been lovely, and yes, we are still staying–it's our home base, have no fear–Twitter will give opportunities such as…well, not really any new opportunities, other than a possibility that more people will see it! Hopefully this is true, and we will keep you up to date with the process–as is the job of a newspaper. Maybe a handful of new staff members will need to be hired to help oversee the new section of the newspaper, but of course, expect no pay. Nobody gets paid at the newspaper, even if you have to deal with Twitter.
As for how we're planning to carry this out, with the limited character count, because no, not even half the newspaper–hell, not even half this article–would fit into a singular Twitter post, the answer is that it's very likely that mini announcements will be posted there, especially throughout the week, mayhaps, as well as the PDF versions, for easier viewing!
Thus, The Overseer would like to announce that it will be expanding towards Twitter in the near future, as that will surely bring nothing but joy.
Here's hoping we might survive, because we really can't afford to hire even more staff, we don't even pay them in the first place, but there are a limited number of citizens out there willing to be unpaid interns.
See you at the worst place on earth, citizens!
Written by Roo
Now onto other news below the cut!
Affiliate Summaries
by Roo
FalseSymmetry: They’re making puns. This is greatly worrying, and honestly, I don’t know what was ever expected.
GoodtimeswithScar: He has a gun, and Pearl has adopted Scar. Apparently.
Grian: He is gobsmacked! He is appalled.
JoeHills: (Wearily) Joe Hills.
MumboJumbo: Just look for yourself. Honestly, maybe don’t do that? I think the Mumbo affiliates need therapy. YouTube thumbnails have ruined their lives.
PearlescentMoon: They’re hosting a marriage?
ZombieCleo: Cleo and Gem on the same team in Pride MCC? Yes indeed, you heard it here first folks, totally, this information hasn’t been given anywhere else, but that’s what a newspaper’s for.
AS ALWAYS!!! If your affiliate group isn’t here. You simply weren’ t talking. Apologies for the short update this week!
Astrology Corner
Flowerscopes by Winter
Have you been feeling without guidance? Do you look at your birthday and look up your star sign and wonder, “Do I need to invest in your flower club?” “Will I need to plan out my life looking at the floral arrangements in my future?” Don’t worry, here at The Overseer, we can help you.*
Hydrangeas: The reader is suggested to arrange an Apple Blossom with Belladonna and Bittersweet, and adorn their room with Hibiscus.
Lillies: Go for a walk and while you are on the walk you may need to look after some Aloe. While you may feel alone, you will never be Anemone.
Orchids: Look to the sky and dream of Yarrow. If you need a bit of help Ivy may be useful.
Carnation: If you feel lost plant Clover. Do not look back on life with Marigold.
Gerberas: Plant Lily-Of-The-Valley, it will help. Look at Lilac and savor it.
Peonies: Trust in life Hyssop will end in Honeysuckle. You will achieve Holly.
Tulips: Look forward you can and will have a Larkspur. Look at the Newspaper staff with Lemon Balm.
Daisy: Go volunteer you will achieve Goldenrod. You may find some Ferns.
White Chrystanum: To cleanse your home smoke Dill and perform a ceremony to keep yourself safe.
Baby’s Breath: You will find underneath your pillow Clematis and Corriander.
Rose: You will experience a Lotus Flower.
Iris: You will understand a Spearmint and a Snapdragon.
All star signs: Don’t worry. Current Sign off.
*Ignore how blatantly specific these are. Nothing will happen to you.
Hydrangeas = Aries
Lillies = Taurus
Orchids = Gemini
Carnation = Cancer
Gerberas = Leo
Peonies = Virgo
Tulips = Libra
Daisy = Scorpio
White Chrysanthemum = Sagittarius
Baby’s Breath = Capricorn
Rose = Aquarius
Iris = Pisces
Op-Ed: Avians and The Watchers
By Lydia
A great number of Avians have taken refuge in The Birdhouse as they have either recently escaped from or recently rescinded their status as Watchers. This development has taken place over the past several weeks since the construction of The Birdhouse itself. During this time, the lavish structure has seen a large group of displaced individuals staying inside for multiple nights at a time, as they slowly transform the area into their sanctuary from the dreaded (seemingly) omnipotent beings. While The Birdhouse was never officially announced during its initial construction days as a haven from The Watchers, the treehouse has found itself to be one of the most crucial structures on the entire server, being the championed landmark of over thirty citizens.
A recurring discussion among this eclectic cast is their ability to accommodate the psychological repercussions that The Watchers have given them, both to the group as a collective and to the individuals themselves. While many of them struggle with the aftermath of having been manipulated and deceived by The Watchers as mere Players, or are recent escapees of the omniscient ensemble, their troubles were far from over upon their arrival. Malevolent Watchers are known to be notoriously sadistic towards those that dare defy them, acting in retaliation through possessing Avians who have been claimed by The Watchers as their puppets, and through physical attacks, kidnappings, and the erasure of memories of said puppets. This is only the surface of their nature and does not cover the entirety of torture methods used by The Watchers.
The consequences of both the past and the present harrowing events cannot be understated. The preponderance of Avians who have dealt with The Watchers harbors several growing internal conflicts. These conflicts cover a variety of personalized disquietude, such as guilt over having been a part of The Watchers themselves, the struggle to control Watcher-given powers, increasing anxiety over the possibility of the Watchers returning to attack The Birdhouse and its inhabitants, distrust between those who are former Watchers and those who are not, the need to ensure that their companions are protected at all times, survivor’s guilt, the knowledge that their loved ones are still in The Watcher’s captivity, and the growing lapse of memories in the minds of those who are Watcher’s Puppets, among other mental dilemmas.
Despite the ongoing crisis regarding malevolent Watchers, the Avians have made great efforts to fight back against them, both through self-defense and the use of another outstanding ensemble that is perhaps on par with The Watchers in terms of their overarching presence: The Listeners. An invisible barrier, serving as a mystical security system for The Birdhouse, was invoked by the de-facto Birdhouse guardian, Ayre, an assistant archivist, and coordinator at The Perimeter. Ayre has also been named as the de-facto “parent” of The Birdhouse for extrapolating their wisdom and caring instincts towards the other members.
Ayre, having previously encountered The Watchers when they were kidnapped and placed into a Third-Life-structured Server, was rescued by The Listeners after refusing to give The Watchers a violent and callous show of competition as a Player. Due to Ayre's affiliation with The Listeners, an imperfect but necessary group for the Avians’ protection, they had gained the ability to use a Listener Incantation to cast a permeable unseen shield over The Birdhouse. This barrier allows only those who have absolutely no harmful intentions toward The Birdhouse members to stay inside the treehouse for longer than a few minutes. The incantation applies specifically to those who are Watchers, cast in hopes of both providing both a practical use and a psychological one to put those who are suspicious of Watcher Avians at ease.
Ayre does not carry the task of helping their fellow Avians alone, thankfully. With everything from personal crafts, baked goods, home-made meals, preening sessions, the arrangement of many blanket forts, and personal décor, The Birdhouse has the mark of not only the citizens who seek a moment to rest, but the mark of those who have overcome incredible horrors. Those who have come to The Birdhouse now show not merely desperation, but the determination to make it an introductory testament to their survival. They engage in all manners of jovial discussions, camaraderie, and creative pursuits, with the addition of meals, music, and medical treatment sessions. A sense of normalcy, whatever that may be, can be elusive during times of both tangible and intangible terror. Despite this, the work that the Avians have put into making their presence in the overall Hermit Citizen community prevalent does not go unnoticed by our reporters at The Overseer. Though these citizens are under the gaze of The Watchers, they are also in the vicinity of those who would seek to bolster them from the sidelines, no matter how far away they may be. While our impact is significantly limited, we firmly believe that they have everything it takes to overcome the trials of the malevolent Watchers, and the expectedly nonlinear recovery processes throughout their time as Hermit Citizens.
Weekly Weather Report
By Nes
Thursday - Thunderstorms are expected to hit the server early Thursday morning and continue into the evening. Citizens can expect a high of 7 degrees Celisuis (45F) and are advised to stay indoors if possible. Flooding is expected for those in valleys and close to the ocean.
Friday - Clear skies are expected Friday with highs of 18 Celsius (65F), chance of rain is low and conditions are optimal for outdoor activities such as building, hiking, or gathering resources.
Saturday - Clear skies with high winds is expected Saturday with winds reaching 20kph and a high of 21 Celsius (70F), chance of rain is moderate and citizens are advised to take caution when flying as windspeed could peak in some areas.
Sunday - Cloudy skies is expected with the wind from Saturday continuing at 20kph and a high of 11 Celsius (52F), rain is highly likely and citizens are once again advised to take caution when flying.
Monday - A thick fog with light drizzles is expected Monday morning before clearing up some time in the afternoon to clear skies and a high of 15 Celsius (59F), citizens are advised to take cation when traveling in the early hours and to enjoy the moderate temperatures of the afternoon.
Tuesday - Clear skies in the early hours with moderate rainfall around noon and a high of 26 Celsius (79F) is expected Tuesday. Citizens are advised to get any outside work done early in the day to avoid being soaked.
Wednesday - Rain is expected to continue until Wednesday morning before clearing up into cloudy skies with a high of 24 Celsius (75F), citizens are advised to enjoy the nice weather with a beach episode or picnic.
Days since last...
B
A few issues ago, we had a great list of days since the last accident on the Hermitcraft server. As the server is still an OSHA violation, we are happy to inform you that, once again, the list is here and the record currently held is still 0.
Ancient Ruins (BdoubleO’s base): 0 - We salute everyone who got killed by HotGuy while protecting the horses. You are the backbone of our society.
Total Chaos: 0 - The fletching table still has no functionality and witches on the sides of Total Chaos still are deadly.
The Perimeter: 0 - Going too close to the wither cage is your own fault.
Etho’s Alien Base: 0 - We know and love the speedy running, but falling from the platform on which the base is, is your own fault.
False’s Base: 0 - The elytra course and kinetic energy are claiming many victims.
Scarland: 0 - Do not touch the funny flying skulls.
Rift/Grumbot Laboratory: 0 - Jumping into the pen with many chickens will kill you.
Gem’s Village: 0 - Trying to recreate the barrel diorama doesn’t end well.
Hypno’s Base: 0 - Gravity will work if you jump down the pit.
Jevin’s Cathedral and Castle: 0 - We know that Jevin is looking for artifacts, but, important note, do not try to show the fabricated artifacts to actual historians. They will not appreciate it and they know how to use weapons.
Dwarven Keep: 0 - The lift is fun, it is great, and easy to fall off.
OMEGA Cave: 0 - The slimes in the pit are not hungry, you don’t have to feed them.
Pinball Machine: 0 - Blowing up the area under the base ended up with many casualties.
Keralis’ Base: 0 - Remember that there are many holes in the walls and floors.
Mumbo’s Vault: 0 - Somehow, many people got bitten by a particularly blood-thirsty horse.
Pearl’s Alien Landscape: 0 - The area with chest monsters is still down there and you can get out. Please get out of there.
Gigacorp: 0 - Don’t run around working tree farms.
Crastle: 0 - Trying to hide artifacts from Cub/Cleo will never end up well for you.
StressMonster101: 0 - Do not talk to the people you don’t know in the new forest, and do not give them your names.
Decked Out: 0 - I could make a montage out of all of the Decked Out workers falling to the bottom of level three while trying to decorate the walls.
TFC’s Branch Mine: 0 - Look under your feet when walking around. Ravines are your enemy.
VintageBeef’s Map Island and Cottage: 0 - Group hiding in the outside toilet is heavily discouraged.
TCG Arenas: 0 - Watch where your elbows go while cheering. Too many people have gotten an elbow in the face treatment lately.
Welsknight’s Village Area: 0 - Do not go outside the area that is lit up. Mobs exist.
xB’s Base: 0 - Do not go into the pens of animals in the Zoo.
Xisuma’s Base: 0 - Be careful when going through the rainbow corridor as colors may distract you and you will fall off. (Happy Pride everyone!)
Zedaph’s Place: 0 - That bed is not safe to sleep in.
Atlantis: 0 - This is an actual creeper, not the Scar’s costume. Run.
Shopping District: 0 - Twinkly Trash expansions contain redstone, and huge falls, and cars. Just be careful. Also, when the sign says “Do not cross the line,” listen to it.
Spawn Village: 0 - The pig slime is not bouncy. And using Cub’s tunnels is safe for Cub and him only.
This content was brought to you by Ilea.
Scar Unsafe Hermits
By Nes
Hermits’ bases are often judged based on whether or not they’re considered Scar safe, and rightfully so, because this man dies a lot. If anyone could die in one block of water, it would be him. But one thing we rarely consider is whether the Hermits themselves are Scar safe. Which Hermits get Scar killed the most? Which ones are currently out to get him? Does he just randomly implode near some of them? Well, dear reader, today we bring you a list of the top 5 unsafe Hermits for Scar to be around.
#5 - JoeHills
While Joe is not inherently a threat to Scar, he is immune to the good times as demonstrated during the 2023 Sexyman polls, where he beat the builder in scitty to scitty combat. We praise his valiant victory and also advise he keep his distance from Scar lest his power to resist the good times kills him.
#4 - Cub
Although they were partners via Convex for a while and seem to be on good terms, we here at The Overseer have no doubt Cub would kill Scar if given the chance. He has already replaced Jellie with a clone. What if Scar is next? Be Cautious.
#3 - Grian
Grian may have kept him alive throughout 3rd Life and a few other series, but at the end of the day, he is also the cause for a lot of Scar’s deaths. Just to name a few, killing him with a creeper in 3rd Life, killing him with a creeper in S8, almost killing him with dripstone several times, pushing him off cliffs, etc. Additionally, Scar is a hazard to Grian. Despite this, they can not be separated, it would destroy the fandom.
#2 - Doc
Docm77 is typically unsafe for Scar to be around solely due to the fact he can break the laws of reality. However, this week he is an extra risk to the builder thanks to The Incident where Scar and Grian blew up his machine. It is advised that Scar runs, and never stops, because Doc will find him eventually.
#1 - Scar
… Who else did you think #1 would be? You could put this man in a 1x1 room with no hard surfaces and unlimited food and water, and he’d still die. We’re convinced his life goal is to die as often as physically possible, and it scares us. Scar needs to be protected from himself.
And that’s our list of the top 5 Scar Unsafe Hermits! Thank you for reading, and if you’re interested in if you’d make the list take the quiz: Are you Scar Safe? (https://uquiz.com/08u8h4)
Lost and Found: Issue 8
By Lydia
All of the following items have been brought to The Overseer staff’s office for safekeeping until they are claimed. If you recognize one of these items as yours, please visit us to receive your items, or contact us at [email protected]. Thank you!
*Not a real email address.
Item 1: A garden sculpture of three frogs.
This sculpture appears to be a garden decoration that was found turned upside-down near one of Rendog’s race tracks. The sculpture has faded green, orange, and pink paint with several geometric patterns painted in many different colors on the backs of these frogs. It is said that they have a low harmony when placed in the sunlight. If this sculpture belongs to you, we hope that you still have room for it in your garden.
Item 2: Six pool floatation rings.
These pool rings all differ in shape, some being created for toddlers and some being created for fully grown adults. They arrived in various bright colors with patterns of pineapples, flamingos, ghasts, allays, and dolphins on them. They were found near Pearl’s largest Alien tree covered in dirt and have since been thoroughly cleaned. If these are yours, enjoy your next trip to the ocean, or the lake!
Item 3: An iron robot with bright blue eyes.
This iron robot measures approximately 4 and a half feet tall and was found wandering through the Shopping District, asking if anyone had seen its owner. When asked the name of its owner, it stated a series of letters and numbers unknown to us. SB-129. If this robot belongs to you, please take your time in picking it up, as it has been very helpful around the office during the past week. We are fully stocked on coffee, tea, and junk food, thanks to our new underling.
Item 4: A pile of music discs, all of which contain original instrumental music.
These music discs do not have titles written on them, however, they do play a selection of genres, including electro-pop, bluegrass, southern gothic, bossa nova, jazz, and reggae. They do not have an artist’s name on them. They were found without any container or sleeves to hold them. Staff members note feeling unexpectedly impressed at the quality of the music. If these discs are yours, please continue your musical pursuits, and send us a copy of your first album!
Item 5: A large lava lamp.
This lava lamp measures approximately five feet tall, with a black base and lava from the Nether inside of it. Upon being plugged in, it was revealed that several miniature depictions of Striders and Ghasts were placed inside. If this lava lamp is yours, we hope it can continue to serve any groovy purposes you have in store for it!
ADVERTISEMENTS
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Due to the upcoming newspaper expansion to Twitter, the overseer is looking for mods! Please contact Roo in the newspaper headquarters if interested. Leave your flint and steel at the door.—————————————————
Stuck in a jam and need an answer quick? Contact The Seers today! Just type any questions, stories, or problems into the Newspaper ask box and our lovely Seers will answer it as soon as they can! We are always thrilled to hear from you.
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You and your cat are invited to a tea party this Friday! Yes, the little rascal can come too. Mumbo has “lent” The Gardening Club his vault and said we’re allowed to do whatever we like! So, come on down to our one-time-only cat cafe! There’s enough tea and coffee for the entire server.
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Please do not accidentally take home a Pearl Affiliate instead of your pet, we need to return them by 9.
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Still unsure of whether or not your base is safe? Call Scar Unsafety Services, and we will make sure it is NOT. Every new build is a potential MOSHA violation waiting to happen.
This week's news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
The Hermitcitizen Hub seems to have tapered off growth right around 640 citizens, but we may have jinxed it, please keep us up to date. This week, a new set of roles has been added so you can let your fellow citizens know if you can be pinged! New rules have been added for your comfort, safety, and pleasure, so ensure you go check those out! Mod applications are still open, and ModMail has been added so you can contact existing Mods easier. On to the news!
We are gathered here today due to the passing of Sirius_Buisness. It led a long and wonderful life. The cause of death was Geminislay. While it was surprising, it was not shocking. While it worked for The Overseer it was fought over, with many of the Newspaper Club declaring their love and fighting for who was Sirius’ favourite. Sirius mentioned that its list of favourite people were in order: People who bribed it, Newspaper Club, and then everyone else. It started after the fall of the court, a Gardening Club in which it grew Anemone and Sampaguita. The deceased is survived by The Overseer and the Gardening Club. The Overseer asks the readers to please give Sirius’s family and friends some peace at the moment.
The deceased asks for you to bring 12 shulker boxes of Sampaguita to The Crastle. Donations of customised socks with its face printed on them and one pair with a photo of King Ren when he was asleep and looked silly would be greatly appreciated. The more socks, the merrier. Donations of clicky pens and diamonds would be greatly appreciated at The Overseer. Sirius’ debt collector has been told to go to the Gardening Club and ask for Tulips.
The readers are reminded that at Sirius’ funeral, there will be jousting to determine who will get to marry Sirius once it decides to make its return. Please remember to bring your anvil protection gear and/or your anvils. To remember it, we ask that you wear neon colours.
Written by Winter
Now onto other news below the cut!
Affiliate Happenings
By Roo
The affiliate guilds of the Hermitcitizen Hub have been busy, discussing important things, pranking anyone who crosses their path, and just plain chilling and drinking tea! So, without further ado, let’s take a look at what they’re up to!
Bdoubleo: He's just a little guy!! They’ve been discussing their favorite silly moments (as they should).
Cubfan135: Apparently it’s 1,508 days since fletching table functionality was promised. Mojang, for your safety and ours, please listen to the Cub affiliates. They are right.
Docm77: I think we should be concerned. They’ve decided that instead of making a union or merch, they’re just going to replace all redstone diamonds with magenta glazed terracotta. Please steer clear of the perimeter if you’re the sort to blindly follow directions.
EthosLab: The only reason anyone goes to his area is to check on the dolphins.
FalseSymmetry: They're excited for False, Ren, Scar X, and Joe Hills to be playin some No Man's Sky together! Sounds like a blast. (Please tell us we're funny. We're unpaid interns, we take anything we can get.)
GoodTimesWithScar: Someone hired a charged creeper. Please. Again, for your safety and ours, a charged creeper is not a good employee.
Grian: The Rift tastes like grape juice, battery acid, wasabi peas, and has the texture of stale Cheerios. No, don’t ask how they found that out. Yes, The Rift is right down there if you want to pop down a medical services tent. The Fixer team is also experimenting with ways to play Just Dance and DDR on Grumbot’s monitor! Bribes are in order, including the promise of letting Grumbot control the difficulty of dance. Join in at your own risk.
ImpulseSv: They had a lovely stream watch party!! And discussed falling off of walkways?? Hi, Minecraft, OSHA called, they’d like to schedule a tour for no reason whatsoever.
Iskall85: Hallo.
Joehills: Affirmative nodding. Yes. Joe Hills indeed.
Keralis: Keralis has a hype squad now! That’s awesome, ngl. :)
Mumbo Jumbo: Mango Jumbo. The sus has returned. They’re still talking about redstone. I got scared even looking in the channel.
Pearlescentmoon: She <3!!!! (got squished in a hydraulic press)
Rendog: I can see the founding of the King’s court. This will surely lead to good and not suing the former king. Surely.
Vintagebeef: They’re just chilling! Chillin’ ‘n chatting, how lovely.
Welsknight: They’re going to make a Wels scrapbook! Drawings, anything he’s dropped in the past week, screenshots of the man himself, the hydraulic press that squished him (yes he got squished too).
Xisumavoid: Frenchsumavoid. Need we say more.
Zedaph: According to a scientist, there is a 31% chance that the reason you randomly think of Zedaph out of nowhere is because of a phenomenon known as mind control.
Zombiecleo: They’re discussing Cleo’s TCG tournaments. All is well.
Recap affiliates: How’d they get into reporting?? Oh, that sounds right up our alley. Maybe the newspaper should hire more recap reporters. We already have a couple, but hey, what’s a couple more?
Other affiliates: Most are homeless or live in the shopping district. Living in the shopping district, I must say, is a horrible idea. Warden attacks are many and days without accidents are zero.
If you do not see an affiliate channel on here, it is simply because nobody was active in the past two weeks, or that activity was simply claiming the first message.
Weekly Weather Report
By Virtual
Note: Rainy has been kidnapped for the foreseeable future. Unfortunately, we don’t have the funding to pay their ransom. We wish them the best of luck on escaping.
Thursday - SUNNY, 25% chance of being challenged to a TCG match in the shopping district. Citizens are advised to bring their best decks.
Friday - WINDY, Citizens working in high areas should be wary of strong gusts. Elytra flight may be difficult to control.
Saturday - CLOUDY, GeminiTay sightings expected around Spawn Town between 1PM - 3PM (GMT). Duels are sure to follow.
Sunday - RAIN, Light showers anticipated across the server, followed by periods of clear skies. Carrying an umbrella is recommended.
Monday - STORMS, 95% chance of Bdubs sleeping before the storm gets serious. Expect clear skies by 10AM (GMT).
Tuesday - SUNNY, Fireworks expected around the Crastle between 6PM - 9PM (GMT). Avoid flying directly above the area during this time.
Wednesday - CLOUDY, 45% chance of HotGuy strikes. Note that clouds may make it more difficult to spot the vigilante from a distance.
Astrology Corner
By Winter
Have you been feeling without guidance? Do you look at your birthday and look up your star sign and wonder, “Will I get challenged by Geminitay?????” “Will I get to choose whether my horoscope will be weird?” Don’t worry, here at The Overseer, we can help you.*
Aries: You will attend a very sirius funeral :) Flip a TCG token to decide whether you will attend in a clown costume.
Taurus: You will attend to a Red Carnation which was sent to you.
Gemini: You will start a successful business. That business teaches first aid.
Cancer: Understand that once upon reading this you will be challenged by GeminiSlay to a battle. Send regrets to loved ones and respond in two-three business days.
Leo: You will become mortal enemies with the Decked Out Crew.
Virgo: You will follow a Joe Hills Tutorial on how to win a beauty contest.
Libra: You will learn how to become a babysitter.
Scorpio: On Thursday at 3:21 PM you will run into a new friend or foe, only time will tell
Sagittarius: You will provide a meditation class to combat Etho’s washed up allegations.
Capricorn: Congrats. You get to do Bungee Jumping in the Spaghetti IF you are born on the odd days of the month.
Aquarius: You will adopt something. Ask a friend for advice and whether they consent to being adopted.
Pisces: Someone you used to know will meet you in the most unexpected place. Whether it is a good or bad thing will be up to you.
All star signs: Don’t worry, you are not being watched… yet.
*Ignore how blatantly specific these are. Nothing bad will happen to you.
META REPORT: BOOMING BOOMERS!
By Arsène
After covering the top of the top, we move into a deck that (in my opinion) is just as strong, but hasn’t gone around too much. The Booming Boomers, as I’ve decided to call them, is a high-paced aggro deck focused around getting your hermits on the board and setting up a strong sweeping Impulse ® to Boomer his way through the competition! The deck certainly has other options, with the amount of extra cards it runs to mill* quickly.
*For people who do not play card games a lot, I will sometimes use terms common in other games. Milling refers to the act of quickly drawing through your deck through cards that discard cards and let you draw more. In the case of this deck, our mill cards are Fishing Rod and Flint & Steel.
DECK LIST ( ® denotes a rare version of the card in the case of hermits)
Tango ® x2
Tango x3
Impulse ® x3
Milk Bucket x1
Water Bucket x1
Diamond Armor x3
Looting x1
Bow x1
Flint & Steel x3
Fishing Rod x3
Instant Health II x3
Double Farm x1
Farm x7
Double Redstone x2
Redstone x8
PLAYING THE DECK
Like stated above, this deck is aggro and looks to set up Impulse ® with a double redstone and two Tangos on board to start using Boomer, dealing 70 damage baseline and +40 for each of the Tangos with him, up to a bonus of 80 damage. 150 damage a turn is enough to two-shot every single Hermit in the game currently. Enabling this strategy is the copies of Flnit & Steel and Fishing Rod letting you look through your deck quickly. Fishing Rod is fairly straight forward to use, with the two cards being put in without any downsides, but Flint & Steel is a bit harder, so let’s talk about using this optimally.
Flint & Steel discards your hand and allows you to draw three cards to replace this. Using this is a last case scenario, so be smart with how you use it. Do NOT use Flint & Steel if you’re going to discard Hermits while you do not have your setup on board. Once you have an Impulse ® plus any two Tangos on board, make sure you have enough items to stock up Impulse to get to Boomer. If you do not have any of the Hermits you need to set up on board, Flint & Steel becomes a priority card, as milling your hand to find them allows you to set up and sweep.
As usual, this deck has a few floater cards that can easily be swapped out for others. Both Buckets, Bow, and Looting can all be swapped out for any other active effects. Try not to grab anymore equipment cards, since your goal is to keep Impulse ® on board doing damage as much as he can, and the Diamond Armors do a great job of this. Alongside well-timed Instant Health Potions, Impulse can stay on the board for a long time with a Diamond Armor. I like holding onto one copy of the Bow because very often, an enemy can switch if a Hermit is in kill-range of a Boomer, and Bow is very often enough to kill most Hermits after one or two attacks. It also synergizes very well with the back-up plan of this deck, Tango ® and Extra Flee.
The big thing to keep in mind with this deck are your win conditions. Find Impulse ®, find any Tangos possible, equip Impulse ® to Boomer and start swinging. Start slamming items on Tango ® as a backup just in case. With the right draw and a strong start, you can quickly end a game by knocking out all Hermits on your opponent’s board before they can draw any more.
Play fast, play quick, play deadly.
That’s all for the Booming Boomers! As always, good luck players, and may you forever draw your Impulses on turn one!
Lost and Found
By Virtual
To the representative interested in claiming “Peekaboo” from last week’s Lost and Found, please meet Paint by Wings & Things in the shopping district. They will be carrying a purple shulker box and three diamonds. We will happily provide any necessary assistance to get “Peekaboo” off our hands.
The following items were collected from across the server over the past week. If you would like to report an item missing, or if you recognize any of the below items as your own, please contact us at [email protected]*
*not a real email address
Item 1:
A pufferfish in a bucket named “Charles,” found in the bushes behind Twinkly Trash.
Though several people have expressed interest in adopting Charles, we are making an effort to find his original owner. The fish has been temporarily relocated to an impromptu fish tank inside the Overseer offices. The tank is already being used as a desk. If Charles belongs to you, please come pick him up. He misses you.
Item 2:
A piece of bedrock, found in the screeching crevice.
The item was delivered to the Overseer offices late last week after a resident of Grumbot’s cave found it in the screeching crevice. The item appears to be bedrock, aside from the fact that it can be held in the palm of a player without incident. Though the bedrock is most likely fake, the implications of its existence have sparked more than one crisis in the citizens who beheld it. If it belongs to you, please collect it, and consider destroying it.
Item 3:
A dusty book written in galactic, found within the bowels of Joe Hills’ pinball machine.
Joe Hills, when confronted with the book, denied any ownership of the item. When translated, the book appeared to contain a list of horoscopes stretching for the next several years. Each horoscope was highly specific, to the point of being disturbing for our translator, who refused to interpret past a prediction for Libra set three weeks from the writing of this article. If the book is yours, please reach out to collect it. If you do not own the book, but can translate galactic, we encourage you to try reading a few passages for scientific purposes.
Item 4:
A collection of fourteen chests in minecarts, found abandoned in the woods surrounding Scarland.
The minecart chests were found when a Scarland employee tripped over them on their way to work. Despite this area of the woods being clear the previous day, the minecarts were sunk half into the ground and covered in vegetation, as though they had been slowly buried over the course of several years. Within the chests were three clocks, a diamond hoe, thirteen stacks of cobblestone, and four blocks of red concrete powder. All efforts to remove the minecarts from their half-sunken state have failed. If this chest monster belongs to you, please collect it in the woods behind Scarland Castle.
Item 5:
A red shulker box stained with a rusty brown substance, found washed up on the shore near Grian’s base.
The box appeared two Fridays ago and was dropped at our office door by someone claiming to be one of Grian’s employees. The player vehemently insisted it not be thrown out before vanishing as quickly as they appeared. When opened, the box smelled faintly of seawater and contained several red corals, all stained with the same brown substance as the shulker’s exterior. The stain spreads to anything the box is placed on and smells faintly of rust. When collecting this item, we suggest bringing a pair of thick gloves and perhaps a face mask.
Ask the Seers
By Seers Jester, S, Vi, and Nes
Has your favourite little guy been put into a situation they can’t get out of? Do you have questions about how a mountain appeared on top of your house last night? Question no more, for The Seers are here to help! Questions can be submitted through the ask box and are collected throughout the week.
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Dear Seers,
Hello! I keep finding myself waking up from a daze in random places and almost exploding! Is there any possible way to stop this from happening?
- :D
Hello, dear smiley face.
It seems I have the honour of answering your question today. Tying yourself in your bed is a highly recommended idea, as is simply finding someone who will accompany you at all times of the day. Looking for wither roses in a tavern will let you meet many who are interested in such jobs, as long as there is payment on the table. You may, also, simply try not being in a daze. I have heard that a well-timed swim in a cold river could wake up even the sleepiest of beasts.
- The Seers
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Dear Seers,
How do you fill up someone's walls with TNT and make the said TNT not explode their house just give them a little scare?
- Avoiding Property Damage
Hi, Avoiding Property Damage!
You have three options here! First and foremost, have the TNT explode in a block of water so it doesn’t cause any damage to the blocks around it. This can be down in many different ways, but I suggest the ol’ single block stream of water method. Downside is unless if you’re present you can only realistically do 1 piece of TNT this way, due to all TNT having to be lit at once.
Option two, ignore the walls go down under! By digging 5-7 blocks below the persons base and placing TNT you can get the full effect of how ever many TNT you want with minimal damage. However, it is possible for the TNT to push one another up into the floor causing a lot of damage.
Option 3, ditch the TNT! Shriekers are your safest bet, as they cause just as loud of a noise with zero risk of property damage. However, they do cause a risk to your safety due to the method of collecting them.
For legal reasons The Seers would like to clarify that it is not responsible for any property damage caused due to someone following our advice. Have fun!
- The Seers
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Dear Seers,
I had the most AWFUL day at spawn :(((( somebody set glitter traps EVERYWHERE and I got caught in what feels like at least twelve of them!!!! Do any of the Seer have advice to get rid of glitter? The glue is making it really hard to get rid of! And any idea whose fault this is?
- The Very Sparkley, Not Vampire
Hello Not Vampire, hopefully I can be if some assistance,
Hmm, I wonder if there’s a glitter related Zedvancement somewhere in the archives that could be of use… I’ll have to get back to you on that. In the meantime, step one is to figure out what type of glitter and glue is in use. I’m talking metallic, plastic, or biodegradable glitter, glue of the washable, super, or hot variety? Step two is to then design a contraption to remove both the glitter and the glue. I personally would suggest a shower or either water or acetone (depending on the type of adhesive) alongside an apparatus for removing the particles. Perhaps some sort of full body lint roller? Now that I think about it, this would be quite the useful device, I’ll look through some records and workshop some blueprints and get back to you ok?
- The Seers
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Dear Seers,
I’m stuck in someones walls. How do I get out?
- Does This Count As Breaking And Entering
Hello Does This Count As Breaking And Entering!
I hope you like the walls you’ve become trapped in, because like Grian in S7 and S8, you now live in them! Can you get out? Yes, you can. Is if funnier if you just live there until you’re discovered? Also yes. I hope you’ve enjoyed this non-help!
- The Seers
ADVERTISEMENTS
By Jamie
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Are you struggling with something and don't know what to do? Don't worry! Nika is here to help! From Potions to Decoration to Farms, any and all types of services are available. The price is up to negotiation!
Nika Helps services are not responsible for any injuries that occur during or after the help process.
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UNLIKE the Scar Unsafe Services, we will help out around your base! The Scar Safety Service is here for all of our fellow citizens, and will ensure your home is safe from various mobs!
All damages or scares committed by pranks and unknown vigilantes cannot currently be remedied by the Scar Safety Service, but experiments are ongoing.
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Do you have a name that can be shortened to Cal? What about Kal? Are you willing to grab one or perhaps pretend a little? The Cal-ition - a Coalition of Cals - is reaching out to any and all potential members among our cal-low citizens! If you'd like more information, simply contact your lo-Cal representatives. Regard-cal-ess of your interest, though, have a wonder-cal day!
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Bring your daisies and coriander to the Crastle this Friday to join in a brief mourning session for RenTheKing. He may have messed up our currency system, but he shall be missed.
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Fun and Games
This weeks fun and games are brought to you once again by Sirius, Morph, Virtual, and Azure! Unclear if Sirius created these before or after succumbing to the grave, but please remember to attend its funeral to honor its passing.
Word Search - By Sirius
Crossword - By Sirius
Coloring page - By Morph
Comic - By Virtual
Brain Teasers - By Azure
In this game, there are four images of some sort and you need to figure out what each Brain Teaser is trying to say! For example, a brain teaser could be the word READ with lines above and below, and it would mean 'read between the lines'. Have fun!
And that’s all for this issue folks! Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful week!
Before our wonderful stories, I would like to give a shoutout to one of our writers, Lydia! You will notice, she wrote most of this week's stories and made many of the games as well to help cover other people who are busy this week! Lydia, you absolute madlad, we appreciate you so much on the team and this server, please do not do that again.
This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
Show Off Your Citizen Creations with Citizen Jams!
By Lydia
Creative minds of all kinds, listen up! The Hermit Citizen Hub has introduced a weekly community event, inviting all artists and writers to participate through a series of prompts released each Friday. If you are looking for an excuse to draw your citizen but are feeling shy about it, or you feel you are running out of ideas, here’s a way to scratch that itch to create with the Hermit Citizen Hub’s new Citizen Jams! All forms of artistic mediums are welcome!
Citizen Jams, or creative prompts focused on encouraging all members of the Hermit Citizen Hub to show off their citizens, were created by Gene, also known as FireApyr, on May 11th. Found in the Discord server, these prompts have encouraged a greater number of people to broaden their citizens’ horizons through various scenarios and costumes. This thread, Citizen Prompts, can be found under Citizen Art, with a specific thread linked in the initial post to Citizen Prompt Suggestions. Your fellow citizens have added several suggestions and there is always room for more!
These suggestions have a wide range, including but not limited to displaying your citizen wearing their favorite pajamas, participating in Zedvancements, showing up in Empires, appearing in pixel art, appearing as a Villain (or a Hero if they are already one), attending a board game night, during their favorite season, drawn with the opposite color scheme of their design, cosplaying a Hermit, and training a Warden.
Two prompts and many submissions have debuted on the server as of May 24th, much to the delight of our server member participants! The first prompt, suggested by Hyo, was “Your Citizen as a DND Character,” prompting artwork of citizens as paladins, rangers, wizards, and more. The second prompt, suggested by BitterTea, for this week, is “Your Citizen at a Tea Party.” Please leave your submissions to the Citizen Prompts in the overall Citizen-Art thread. We look forward to seeing your citizens in all kinds of situations and costumes!
Now onto other news below the cut!
Affiliate Summaries
By Roo
Bdouble0: Bdubs has shark grabbers, platform boots and a stepladder now.
DocM77: They’re plotting something. There’s been no further explanation.
GoodTimesWithScar: New HotGuy merch!! Not IRL, which has been a disappointment, but they’re enjoying the new graduation hats nonetheless. Hotguy may have a shotgun in future events, it is unofficial.
Grian: They anime-d Grian?? I think. It’s honestly really concerning.
ImpulseSV: He’s sweeping your chimney right now. No, it’s not a threat. Goats are great at sweeping chimneys.
MumboJumbo: They joined the biker gang and also predicted the future. Mumbo affiliates, if you are looking for a job that is NOT in a biker gang, the Seers is always open. (/j. Kinda.)
PearlescentMoon: She’s so small!!!! Itty bitty pearl :)
Rendog: They’re all so excited about the boat race! Yay for boat races. The newspaper should probably cover that, huh.
Welsknight: They’re working hard on the scrapbook! It’s looking splendid so far.
XisumaVoid: He’s a hermitcitizen now? Apparently. He’s also adopted everyone, so if you’re looking for a father figure, we’ve got one right here. He’s at the Scarland lost and found.
ZombieCleo: They’re just vibing and getting absorbed into other games! A lovely time, really.
If you do not see your affiliates here: Yet again, this is because some channels have not been active or are not notable. Please notify us if there have been any typos or misinformation.
Citizen Appreciation: Topaz, the Quintessential Patron of the Arts!
By Lydia
If you have ever visited the art channels of the Hermit Citizen Hub, you know that every artist is on the edge of their seat as they read the latest compliment from our endlessly hardworking artistic cheerleader, Topaz. Since April 19th, our fellow citizen and adamant patron of the arts, Topaz, has tracked down each art piece posted in our Citizen Art channels on our Discord server and to leave positive affirmations for each artist’s piece. She points out specific details and praises each piece for the artist’s personal flair, highly motivating the spirits of every drawer, painter, pixel artist, and crafter who crosses the threshold from merely observing others’ art pieces to sharing their work with a larger audience in that of the Hermit Citizen Hub.
Topaz is a fellow artist herself, having depicted her own Hermit Citizen as a member of Pearl’s cleaning team, who also takes care of Bdubs’ horses and leans into her medium as a video game character, providing her own sound effects when jumping and upon deaths. She lives in a treehouse north of Mumbo Jumbo’s vault and shows her skill strengths in Mining, Exploring, and Overall Dexterity in navigation. She is also a very decent prankster and builder. Many citizens recognize her art style for its high emphasis on bold shapes and straightforward colors, with thick outlines to give her work that extra punch of polished realization. In addition to her own citizen artwork, she has also created fanart of The Life Series, Empires SMP, fellow citizens of the Hermit Citizen Hub, has shared her own artistic improvement in redrawing her older character art, and has drawn several Hermits for the Hermit A Day art challenge. Topaz also crochets in addition to drawing traditional and digital artwork. All citizens are encouraged to take a look at her pieces in the art channels if they have not done so, yet!
Topaz’s eye for both her own and others’ artistic traits is exceptionally perceptive. In her affirmations, she highlights every wonderful peculiarity and characteristic that each artist wishes to convey. Everything from the details of how meticulously textured a character’s costume is, to the dynamic color choices of each character’s design, to the uncanny lifelike nature of a character’s eyes, and anything else that you may not say aloud but want to make a known idiosyncrasy of your artwork, will be featured in Topaz’s assessment of your piece. Another staple of Topaz’s affirmation is the returned “Thank YOU!” to each person’s gratitude, turning it back to the artist for sharing their inimitable creative styles and depictions of both their own and others’ characters.
Topaz’s unbridled enthusiasm towards her fellow artistic community is returned as frequently as the awestruck members can muster, many of whom had insisted that she receive recognition for her crucial influence on the server. Because of this, Topaz has received a special role in the Hermit Citizen Hub in honor of her foundational presence as the quintessential patron of the arts: Hermitcity Art Society, as a seal of appreciation from the moderation team. This was given in reflection of the thanks that the community would like to show her. We would like to congratulate Topaz for her emotional labor, support, and dedication to this community, and we wish her all the best!
Weekly Weather Report
By Lydia
Wednesday - MOSTLY SUNNY, High 19 Degrees, Low 10 Degrees. Balloons in the shape of Withers are expected to fly through all areas.
Thursday - WINDY, High 22 Degrees, Low 9 Degrees. Several sets of DND dice will roll through all areas. Enjoy your free dice!
Friday - RAINY, High 26 Degrees, Low 11 Degrees. There is a 65% chance of rain to be iced tea instead of water.
Saturday - SUNNY, High 24 Degrees, Low 12 Degrees. Whirlpools may form in all oceans.
Sunday - PARTLY CLOUDY, High 18 Degrees, Low 7 Degrees. Temperatures are expected to drop in the early afternoon. A low growling may be heard from The Rift from 10:00 AM to 7:00 PM.
Monday - RAINY, High 23 Degrees, Low 12 Degrees. Umbrellas will be provided to any passers-by in the shopping district, courtesy of The Overseer.
Tuesday - MOSTLY CLOUDY, High 26 Degrees, Low 9 Degrees. Jellyfish are expected to wash up on many shores. They will be entirely transparent.
Wednesday - WINDY, High 20 Degrees, Low 11 Degrees. Sand storms are expected around 4:00 PM. Make sure you have a way to cover your face.
WARNING: Explosive Wither Skulls Hovering Over Scarland Central Square
All citizens in Scarland are recommended to remain on high alert due to Docm77’s retaliation to The Incident (Grian and Scar breaking his Redstone). Several explosive Wither Skull Mines have been transported to Scarland’s Central Square by Docm77. They hang ominously over Scarland’s main central street. They will very likely reign destruction upon Scarland in the near future.
Editor's note: Again, if any of our readers are rich and generous, we ask for assistance in paying Rainy’s ransom. The kidnappers’ identity is still unknown, but leaving a pile of diamonds on the doorstep of the Overseer offices may be enough to reach them.
Come and Visit the Citizen Shops and Services!
By Lydia
A number of citizens in the Hermit Citizen Hub are hard at work making sure that their shops and services are in tip-top shape for the benefit of all who visit the Hermitcraft server. With the addition of an officially documented list of shops and services, we are happy to share the wares and whereabouts of our community’s bustling businesses, many of which are always on the move for your convenience! Enjoy exploring and meeting your fellow shop owners, for there is always help right around the corner! The following is a collection of official citizen businesses that help us liven up the server with everything from materials in bulk, to clinics, researchers for hire, and more!
Do you need to send a package, letter, or perhaps a collection of prized trinkets to your favorite citizens? 10K Blocks is a delivery service run by Hyo the Human that can handle everything and anything YOU need to be sent to anyone on the server! Diamonds are the commonly accepted form of payment, but if you’re short on diamonds, sentimental items will also suffice for anything you’re looking to swiftly ship to your companions! If you would like to make a delivery order, come and visit the Hyo Delivery Interaction thread!
Do you think you might have a slight touch of Watcher Trauma? Do you experience growing anxiety over your safety as an affiliate of Grian or Scar? Are you getting a twinge of bloodthirst, but afraid of hurting your companions? Glowberry Therapy, with multiple locations across the server for your convenience, is here with open arms to help you process everything from finding that your companions have been captured by The Watchers to recurring guilt over setting off an unfathomable chain of events in your past! Therapy from Theseus of Glowberry Therapy is available if you only ask him with a message in the Citizen Talk thread. Therapy is free, but donations are especially appreciated.
Do you crave cookies, pies, cakes, muffins, or any small pastries? You’re in luck because Z (or Zee) has your perfect fix with Painted Wings, their mobile vendor cart running all through Scarland! For just a few diamonds, usually within the 1-5 range, you can taste just a lovingly baked magical treat! Send Z a message in the Citizen Talk thread if you find your stomach growling!
Is your curiosity about a certain mob or biome itching the corners of your brain? Come to Cloud’s Office, located in the Shopping District, and see Azure Clouds to find yourself a researcher who will tell you anything you want to know about these creatures and locations! Send them a message in the Citizen Talk thread for any of your creature and environment studies needed! Any chance for them to share their knowledge is a chance for you to look at your chosen subject with brand-new eyes. All they ask for is 1-10 diamonds (depending on the level of danger) and an attentive ear!
Do you need any medicines or potions? Come to The Pharmacy, located in the center of the shopping district, run by Ender R. Enderwoah! Prices fluctuate based on Ender’s mood and your own demeanor, so put your best face on when you stop by! If you’re pleasant enough, you could even find common items for just a diamond a piece! Find Ender’s thread, The Pharmacy, and leave them a note!
Are you looking for materials from the deep dark areas of the Overworld? Sculk Shriekers, Deepslate, Glowberries, and more are available just east of iBuy at The Quarry Crop, run by Ashes! Give them a message in Citizen Talk, and keep your inventory open for materials in bulk! Prices vary depending on the danger factor, but are well worth it!
Are you looking for a prosthetic or mobility aid from one of the most skilled crafting citizens on the server? Look no further! You can find something perfectly suited to yourself and your style from On the Move! Located at a small workshop near the beach behind iBuy, you can purchase individually customized, hand-crafted, efficiently made, personalized prosthetics and mobility from Fin! Find their Citizen I.D. card and leave a message for them!
Do you need a child, pet, or an inebriated companion to be looked after? For 2 diamonds per hour (or a stockpile of building supplies), you can drop off your ward at The Copper Clinic and Daycare, run by Doc Zero in the Shopping District! In addition, if you are injured or looking for a medical check-up, you may receive a free referral to The Pharmacy as well, though donations are appreciated! Find Doc Zero’s Citizen I.D. card and leave him a message or leave him a message in the Citizen Talk thread if you’re looking for a sitter or clinic!
Many of these shops and services are just getting started, and are more than ready for a full string of customers! We hope you all enjoy your stay in the Hermit Citizen Hub, no matter how long you plan to be with us!
Lost and Found
By Lydia
The following items were brought in from across the server this week. As nobody knows who they belong to, they have been categorized as lost. If you recognize any of the following or would like to report a lost item, do reach out to us at [email protected]*
*Not a real email address
Item 1:
A blue glass bottle with a scroll inside. The scroll shows a blueprint for a hot air balloon station.
This bottle was found near Keralis’ shipyard. The blueprint seems to be recently drawn, however, the paper is turning yellow due to age. When asked about these blueprints, no one in the area had claimed them, nor had they heard of any plans for a hot air balloon station. The blueprints are drawn in colored pencil and the bottle itself glows in the dark. If this bottle belongs to you, please tell us if you are still planning to create a hot air balloon station when you come to claim it!
Item 2:
An old notebook containing transcripts of a quiz show.
This notebook is a spiral notebook with an orange and yellow cover that contains several transcripts and notes from a quiz show of an unknown name. It is unknown what the title of the show was, as it was never written down. The transcripts of the show appear to involve a tumultuous style of hosting which involves bringing in contestants to fist-fight each other before answering questions related to various Minecraft mobs. To the person who owns this book, please know that we have been very entertained by its contents!
Item 3:
A cloth doll found near Enchantea depicting a gothic baseball player.
This doll was found in near-perfect condition just outside of the shop. It is approximately 11 inches tall and has a black baseball uniform with gothic jewelry around the neck and wrists, with four ear piercings. It has curly green hair and silver button eyes. A patch of a peanut shell is sewn onto the back of its shirt. Neither a baseball nor bat was found with it.
Item 4:
6 2-inch coins made out of brass, all depicting images of fish tails and birds’ wings.
These coins are green and surprisingly heavy. Four of them appear brand new, but the others appear to have rusted over many years. Each coin depicts two fish tails and four sets of bird wings, specifically the tails of Rainbow Trouts and the wings of California Condors. Anyone holding these coins notes that they feel as if they are about to be chased down by a threatening being, and everyone we have asked refuses to touch them. If these coins are yours, please claim them as soon as possible.
Item 5:
A beige amphora made of clay, depicting the image of several Striders walking across a lava lake filled with dominoes.
This amphora was found near Total Chaos. The artwork is painted in shades of orange, red, and dark turquoise. The images are crudely drawn and one of the handles is missing. Nothing was found inside the amphora, and it appears to have never held anything at all, as the inside is perfectly clean. If this amphora belongs to you, please consider displaying some of your plants inside of it!
Spectating Science: Warden Science with Tango Tek for Decked Out
Recapped by Cirrus, the Shoebill, written by Lydia
Scientific advancements throughout the Hermit Citizen Hub and among the Hermits themselves continue onward, allowing greater insight into familiar faces. Any citizens who are interested in the instinctual behaviors and idiosyncrasies of creatures of the most dangerous caliber are invited to share their theories related to the focused mob of this article. Wardens today are not as mysterious as they were during their first debut on all servers, however, this does not deter many from inquiring more about the aspects that we do not fully understand, or that we may elaborate upon concerning these sensory beasts.
While last week’s edition of Spectating Science focused on the study of Ravagers from the perspective of your fellow citizen, a biologist and animal behaviorist, Redfeather, this edition focuses on a single day’s experiments conducted by your Hermit, Tango Tek, as he fine-tuned his knowledge of Wardens and continued the early planning stages of his hand-crafted dungeon-crawler game, Decked Out.
Wardens are set to be integrated into the third and fourth levels of Decked Out as the primary threats to Players attempting to collect their artifacts and escape the game with their life. In addition, Wardens were stated to have many intimidating traits that can be used to strike the right level of haste and panic in these Players, but they needed great adjustments to their environment due to their many setbacks. Tango Tek’s live broadcast from May 17th featured trials and experiments conducted on these Wardens in a two-and-a-half-hour session. These experiments centered on necessary changes to increase Warden sensitivity and aggression to make the levels a greater challenge than the previous ones.
One of the Warden’s most significant obstacles, according to Tango Tek, is the extended length of time that a Warden takes to find a Player. This required several assessments of both traversal and sensitivity ranges at the beginning of his broadcast. His initial tests aimed to assess the traversal capabilities of the creatures, finding that the presence of lava slows down a Warden’s walking and running speed, causing it to struggle through its presence. Soul sand will also slow down a Warden’s walking speed. A flow of lava will also easily push a Warden in the stream’s direction, making it unusable for a Warden’s pathing. Wardens do not take damage from lava and are capable of swimming up walls made of lava, but this is not an ideal construction. Instead, Tango Tek settled on using fire in the place of lava for the time being, because it works well to slow down the Player while allowing the Warden to walk and run at its normal pace.
A given advantage for Wardens is their ability to move in a path toward a Player despite their inability to see, and this remains consistent even with the presence of trivial, small dead ends in maze settings. Larger dead ends may cause issues for Wardens, which affects the layout of the third and fourth levels to accommodate a Warden’s initial patterns of pathing. Tango Tek stated that he would likely make each corridor 2 blocks wide at a minimum. He also added that railings are imperative to any staircases if a Warden may risk falling off of them when chasing down a Player.
The next tests conducted centered on Darkness and the sound of Wardens’ heartbeats. Wardens give Players within a 20-block radius the effect of Darkness, which lasts for twelve seconds and is reapplied every six seconds, in addition to creating the sound of an audible heartbeat from approximately 50 to 60 blocks away from a Player. Each Warden’s heartbeat accelerates depending on how aggravated it is, meaning that multiple Wardens will not synchronize their heartbeats with each other. These heartbeats come in tandem with the effect of Darkness given to each Player. The level of Darkness pulsing can physically be changed by each Hermit through their out-of-world settings, and can even be set to not pulse at all. Tango Tek stated, however, that this is not an ideal way to play the game and interferes with the way that he wants them to experience the game’s environment. He also confirmed that the primary heartbeat sound effect that was added to Decked Out overpowers the heartbeat of the Wardens, but he does not see this as a large issue and prefers the sound of the Decked Out sound system to take priority in order to build up the Player’s sense of urgency.
The most intensive tests during the broadcast related to the aggravation and ability of a Warden to track down and kill a Player. With the help of a data pack created by his friend, Grifter, Tango Tek proceeded to measure the way that Wardens’ aggravation becomes affected by different factors. The first section of these intensive tests related to distance, a Warden’s sense of touch, projectiles, and a Warden’s use of scent. Wardens sniff when they are idle and can detect all Players within a 25-block radius. This does not make them aggravated, but it does send them on the path to the Player. A Player walking is the first step to aggravating a Warden, with the others being a Player throwing a projectile that physically contacts the Warden and touching the Warden with one’s bare hands or a weapon. A Warden that is hit with a projectile is easily aggravated faster than in any other way that a Player may antagonize it. A Warden’s roar is also a sign of its aggravation rising. Sneaking is the Player’s first line of defense against aggravating a Warden. If a Warden is not able to reach a Player with its long arms, it will release a Sonic Shriek, dealing a heavy amount of damage as well. A Sonic Shriek has a range of 16 blocks horizontally and 20 blocks vertically.
The second part of this intensive period related to environmental sounds and how they affect a Warden’s attention. Wardens always prioritize the vibrations of a Player over the vibrations of other objects but are also drawn to other objects that create sound within their vicinity. Wardens will not use their sniffing ability when they are distracted by noise-making objects when the Player is over 16 blocks away, which limits the way that Tango Tek may use such elements in relation to Wardens.
The third part of this section involved Tango Tek running through a maze of three-block-tall walls to get to the other side and successfully outrun a Warden. He then added more Wardens upon realizing that merely one Warden proved to be unsatisfactory. The testing area ranged approximately 70 by 70 blocks, the approximate size that Level Three is planned to match. Level Three may be larger, and will also include vertical portions. The goal of creating Level Three is to make the terrain harder for the Player to navigate, but easier for the Warden to traverse and track the Player down. Due to the set of Wardens placed within the testing area taking a longer amount of time to track down the Player and become aggravated, Tango Tek needed a solution to enhance the Wardens’ sensory input. These tests confirmed the need for a new set of experiments to increase the Wardens’ range of aggravation and tracking time.
The final portion of the broadcast showed Tango Tek’s solution to these timing issues. Tango Tek, through the use of calibrated sculk sensors (a future addition to the game), amethyst blocks, and pistons, successfully increased the range of a Warden’s aggravation from 16 blocks to a full 50 blocks. Through the connection of these “nodes” (single units consisting of a calibrated sculk sensor, amethyst block, and piston), he not only increased the range of aggravation but significantly increased the speed of a Warden tracking down a Player and shortened the time in which a Warden would become aggravated by said Player. He describes this grid format of nodes in the way of activating them through the pistons, set off by the amount of clank generated by each Player. During the Player’s run, they will activate the connected calibrated network depending on how long they stay in the dungeon. Despite this critical improvement, Tango Tek must moderate the nodes that are used throughout the entire dungeon to ensure that the game is not too difficult for the Player to complete.
The broadcast ended shortly after this experiment, leaving its viewers with a greater understanding of the capabilities, setbacks, and potential enhancement of Wardens. With this research and experimentation, Tango Tek has greatly enhanced the intelligence and threat levels posed by Wardens to Players for Decked Out, specifically through increasing their range of traversal and aggravation towards the Player. Thanks to Tango Tek’s use of calibrated sculk sensors, Wardens will be a more formidable presence as they take center stage in Levels Three and Four of Decked Out. The overall goal in this endeavor is to encourage the Player to be stealthy and quick, rather than to frustrate them and tempt them to brute force their way through the dungeon.
We invite any applied researchers to bring forth any growing developments that they would like to share in this segment and look for Cirrus, the Shoebill, for an interview about themselves and their work. In addition, tangents and rambles are more than welcome. No discovery is too small, and it is never too late to teach your fellow citizens something new!
[If you would like to be interviewed for Spectating Science, please look for Cirrus’s Citizen I.D. card in the Discord server and leave a note for them.]
Ask the Seers
By Seers Jester, S, Vi, and Nes
Has your favourite little guy been put into a situation they can’t get out of? Do you have questions about how a mountain appeared on top of your house last night? Question no more, for The Seers are here to help! Questions can be submitted through the ask box and are collected throughout the week.
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Dear Seers,
I took your advice and got things done :]
Bobby now has a better room with much more space, and the cats are finally getting along with him!
Too well actually.
Call me paranoid, but what do I do if I feel like my cats and warden are trying to plot something against me? I feel like the snack barrels aren’t gonna safe anymore.
- Paranoid Cat And Warden Parent
Hello Paranoid Cat And Warden Parent,
Apologies for the delayed response, we here at The Seers all mysteriously disappeared to a death game. But we’re back now! Hopefully just in time to save you from your scheming pets…
The most important thing is to find out why they’re plotting, have you not been feeding them their favourite snacks often enough? Are they not getting enough attention? Did you step on one of their feet last week? Figure out why they’re mad and try to bribe them with extra of whatever they’re mad about.
If that fails, separate them. They may be friends, but if they’re dangerous they cannot play together. I’m not saying rehome any of them, just maybe move Bobby away from your base until things blow over!
If you try that and Bobby ends up escaping and returning to plotting with the cats, make a noise machine. It will entertain him long enough for him to forget about whatever they were plotting about.
If all else fails, pack your bags and leave. Perhaps consider the perimeter, because that’s probably more safe then your house right now.
- The Seers
ADVERTISEMENTS
By Jamie
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Have a package to deliver? A letter to send? Contact Sirius Postal Services NOW for all your mailing needs - the cheap, quick, and easy way of delivery! All letters and packages are insured to get to their destination at precisely the correct moment, whenever that may be.
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Come by Ashes’ shop just east of iBuy for various 1.19 blocks! Don’t want to bust your hands mining deepslate? Not to worry, in The Quarry Crop you can buy things in bulk! Be sure to clear out your inventory before shopping.
Disclaimer: Prices may vary depending on the danger factor.
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This week’s Garden club meeting is being held at Etho’s Alien Gateway! He may be washed up and late to the season but things are going swimmingly for this wet cat! Members please remember to bring your most exotic flowers so we can make Etho feel a little bit better.
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Have those pesky SSS members lit up your base without your permission? Are you losing your mob buddies at night because of safety precautions? Here at the SUS we can fix that! Your base will go back to exactly as it was before, and you’ll no longer be lonely on cold nights.
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Fun and Games
This week's fun and games are brought to you by Lydia once again and Azure
Word Search by Lydia
Crossword by Lydia
Coloring page by Lydia
Brain Teasers by Azure
And that’s all for this issue folks! Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful week!
This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
The Incident and What it Means for You
By Virtual
News of The Incident has been making its rounds around the Hermitcraft server this week, and citizens have been left wondering what carnage will be wrought as a result.
To those concerned about a second (third if you count the Mycelium resistance) civil war, rest easy. It is likely that the two perpetrators will be the only ones Doc targets. For those not affiliated with Grian or Scar, congratulations! You have free tickets to the show of a century. To those unlucky citizens affiliated with the troublemakers, it is likely The Horrors will be unrelenting. The last time Grian touched DocM77’s redstone, the Hermitcraft server experienced a civil war unlike any it had ever known. Since then, Doc has acquired new weaponry and game-breaking mechanics. The serverwide anvil launcher, goat mech, and living, breathing ender dragon have the potential to make any coming wars very bad for Grian and Scar specifically.
Sources from within the Perimeter say that Doc’s strategies will be psychological until he prepares his heavy weaponry for launch. Efforts currently seem to be focused on Grian, making his base a very dangerous place to be. The charged creeper launcher is once again an active threat, and citizens can expect everything to start breaking in ways that defy physics, reality, and all common sense. Those working for or living near the affected area may want to take shelter within Grumbot for the time being. Though Scarland is yet to be targeted, workers are already beginning to post evacuation routes and vacate the theme park, demonstrating a collective survival instinct far greater than that of their boss. This is an advisable course of action.
All citizens will be watching the events following The Incident with rapt attention. Though the consequences coming towards Grian and Scar will be fun and games, citizens should still be on the lookout to keep themselves safe. To those citizens who want to avoid all possibility of being caught in the crossfire, the safest option will be to change your identity and begin working for Joe Hills.
Now onto other news below the cut!
Astrology Corner
By Winter
Have you been feeling without guidance? Do you look at your birthday and look up your star sign and wonder, “Will the market fall, and due to my investments, I will become broke????” “Am I the capitalist?” Don’t worry, here at The Overseer, we can help you.*
Aries: Do not invest in the button, it may blow up in your face.
Taurus: I wager that you will need to invest in your local newspaper.
Gemini: Due to the rise of Etho heads across the market, you will be paid in Etho heads this week. Make room on your counter.
Cancer: Due to the rise in your boss's anger, you will take out a loan.
Leo: Your life insurance just went up due to your affiliation with GTWS/Grian.
Virgo: You will cash out on the prediction on how the TCG matches worked out.
Libra: You should invest in Redstone as it will increase rather soon.
Scorpio: You will start to see a decline in profits. Pray to the button.
Sagittarius: It will become profitable to become a ghost hunting agency.
Capricorn: You will be tipped a diamond to convince your boss to take part in the war.
Aquarius: You are advised to invest in a protection shield.
Pisces: No one will notice if you sit in front of the button all day.
All star signs: Don’t worry, you are not being watched… yet.
*Ignore how blatantly specific these are. Nothing bad will happen to you.
From the Sidelines
By StarryFelix
Scar, Grian, Bdubs and Doc affiliates+
The last week on the server was chaotic to say the least. With the recent happenings on the server, several of the affiliate guilds are either in shambles or laughing about the shenanigans of their employers. Bdubs’ guild is wondering if dearest Scar’s comment section will ever recover.
The Stress affiliates are happy that she has finally returned to the Hermitcraft server, and Iskall is welcomed back with massive warmth as well. Beside some of the chaos there are most definitely some good and heartwarming moments.
Now… Grian and Scar’s little accident, which I assume people have written about already, is making the citizens in Scarland question the extent of their safety. While they are celebrating all the beautiful new visitors throughout the park (courtesy of Cleo’s amazing armour stand work) and the rising of the absolutely stunning castle, the tensions are visible.
After the intervention for Grian and the back of his base, the people in the area are questioning whether he will even get to finish it. The affiliates do not seem to be too concerned about their own safety, but this might be mainly because so many of them live underground, close to The Rift. Perhaps they’re more used to dangerous situations? The ever unexpectedly weird Grumbot might have influenced their way of looking at the world, and we may never know if this is the truth. This is, for the most part, speculation.
Generally, there still seems to be peace. The question is for how long because last time, “It all started when Grian touched my redstone,” so we don’t know what will happen. The citizens are following all of the events, the rise of tensions, the Tweets, and Youtube Comments of their affiliated Hermits on foot to partially ensure their own safety.
On a happier note, the Beef affiliates are happy that there is finally a solid base instead of just the TCG area or the starter base. It has been both a busy and calm week, and it seems that soon there might be more interesting stuff happening to report about.
For now, it seems most citizens are waiting in anticipation for what might happen next. The speculations of war are ever more present than they usually are on the Hermitcraft server… many affairs and mishaps this week.
I will be heading off and will be keeping an eye on how the citizens take all the sudden commotion that is going on. For now, this was From the Sidelines and I hope to see you in the next column!
Museum Opening!
By Ilea
This week on Hermitcraft we were able to witness an opening of a museum. Of course all of the artifacts in it were ethically sourced and through some serious convincing (and sneaking into it through the back door) we managed to prepare a short guide to it.
Starting with none other than the TCG cards, that have been taking the server by storm. The exhibit was of course donated by VintageBeef himself and we absolutely want to shine more light on it as the TCG tournament is coming to an end.
Then we can see quite a collection of artifacts that are connected to the King's Rules on the server, which includes things like the infamous "No No No No" disc and an invite to the party at which it was played. From the same collection we may find heads of both evil and good King Ren as well as multiple King's Banners and even a shield with it. Probably our favorite artifact from this collection is the "You speak when spoken to!" horn, that over the months has brought a lot of joy and earplugs to many of us.
In a carefully secured glass box we can see the "Begin?" button that opened the Rift and had us connect with the Empires. Right next to it positioned is "King Sausages Diamond of Peace" to remind us about our Empires friends. For now the button is unclickable and we can safely say that this is an actual Grianproof casing.
What is not Grianproofed are Mumbo's vaults and right next to the button we see the first vault key of the season. We are sure that he is not using it anymore, but if anyone would ever feel like trying to get into it, then copying this exhibit should work.
Right opposite we can see a mysterious creeper that had us run away scared not to break something, but then we read the label. As it turned out this was Scar's prized creeper costume that managed to scare the life out of many people. We are really glad that it is safe in the museum now and no longer in his hands.
Speaking of Scar, in this museum we can look at the Scarland VIP pass, which we all can only dream about. What lies close to it is a Zedvancement trophy that had us wondering about what it was for and an old stream day torch, that quite honestly is a blast from the past.
Upstairs we firstly can see the giant dragon head of a Dragonbro that was given to Cubfan by Bdubs. Through the great Hermit Vine we have managed to find out that it was a prize for Cub completing a quest and later used by him as his Royal Magician attire.
After that we are greeted with an array of heads, starting with the ultra rare Baldubs(Bald Bdubs) head from his head shop. Quite honestly upon seeing this we were too stunned to speak. Right next to it there is an awful lot of hair provided by a dwarven beard. We absolutely love the style of it, the braids on this thing are incredibly intricate, but we do not recommend making pictures with it.
Lastly there hangs a sad proof of how washed up our old, but still beloved Etho is. Once again we give our condolences to his pvp skill and wish him a swift recovery.
That is all of the exhibits that we managed to find, hopefully it will grow over the next months, and who knows, maybe we will have a chance to visit it again.
Lost and Found
By Virtual
The following items were collected from across the server over the past week. If you would like to report an item missing, or if you recognize any of the below items as your own, please contact us at [email protected]*
*not a real email address
Item 1: A green shulker box, found on top of Zedaph’s netherite beacon.
Though Zedaph seemed reluctant to give up the box, one of his affiliates delivered it to the Overseer offices last week. When opened, the box contained twelve anvils, a pair of green leather trousers, and three goat horns, all renamed to some variation of DocM77’s username. The purpose of these items is unknown, and their existence raises some concerning implications. If this box belongs to you, collect it at the Overseer offices as soon as possible.
Item 2: A nether portal without corners, found in the lagoons below Scarland Castle.
The nether portal was found completely submerged yet still functioning. The portal was originally suspected to belong to DocM77; However, the goat has denied responsibility for it. When swam through, the portal dropped citizens into a strange, dark corner of the nether disconnected from any visible nether hub, despite its proximity to Scar’s portal. If this anomaly belongs to you, consider relocating the portal or putting up a sign.
Item 3: An unusable ender pearl, found in Cub’s TCG arena.
When thrown, this ender pearl will not teleport the player. Instead, it returns to the user’s inventory in the same hand it was thrown from, regardless if a player is already holding something different. The ender pearl also puts out a constant stream of End ambiance no matter what biome it is in. If this item belongs to you, pick it up before next Friday. Cub has plans to begin experimenting on it.
Ask the Seers
By Seers Jester, S, Vi, and Nes
Has your favourite little guy been put into a situation they can’t get out of? Do you have questions about how a mountain appeared on top of your house last night? Question no more, for The Seers are here to help! Questions can be submitted through the ask box and are collected throughout the week.
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Dear Seers,
Today, I was just doing my usual shift at Scarland, and then BOOM!! I got Hotguyed!! And also died!! This is a near daily occurrence. My back is killing me from all the repeated injuries. Send help/advice, please. I can’t keep doing this!
- Porcupine of a Popcorn Vendor
While I'm aware of a pamphlet of advice produced by the associated Scarland staff, I presume you're needing more than that. While it's not exactly feasible to never be Hotguy'd again, there are some tricks that could make things easier for you.
Option number one, actually, is to complain to your boss. While OSHA doesn't really apply here vis-a-vis entitlement to a safe working environment, he'd probably be willing to move you to a position working indoors if this is really affecting you. I heard once that he was actually able to pull some strings and ask Hotguy himself to stop bothering a particular staff member after they mentioned all the sharpness arrows were, respawn or no, making their chronic back pain flare up really bad.
Another option, if you wouldn't like to talk to your boss about it (understandable), is to get your hands on a mascot suit. Hotguy has never shot someone in a Jellie costume (I suspect some sort of deal with Scar?) and you can use that to your advantage. I'm at least ninety percent sure all employees of Scarland are entitled to wear a Jellie fursuit if they can stand it in this weather, but policies could have changed, I don't know. Maybe enough merch would be close enough?
Final option - desperate option - is to try and wear camouflage with your environment. This means being out of uniform, but also not being an obvious target for aerial attacks (or at least less obvious than someone else). This might mean breaking dress code a bit, but… Well, if someone talks to you about it you get the opportunity to explain yourself and how the Hotguy attacks have been a genuine problem for you lately, which routes back to "complain to your boss" option, minus the part where you start the confrontation. If no one bothers you about being out of uniform/in a dyed-light-maroon uniform, you're now less of a target for random velocitay attacks.
Best of luck! If this advice can't help you avoid Hotguy attacks entirely, I hope it at least lessens them!
- The Seers
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Dear Seers,
Back at it again, I used your advice on the shriekers! But I kept the TNT a bit, tested it out, and your advice worked!
Now I have a tiny problem. I got a Warden chasing me around and I don't wanna kill him. I've grown attached to Bobby the Warden.. but he scares my cats and I don't have any place to keep him. Any suggestions?
- Crazier Than The Beast Wranglers
Hello, Crazier Than The Beast Wranglers!
So glad our previous advice helped. Hopefully the receiver of your prank appreciated it as much as you did!
As for Bobby, I suggest asking your local beast wrangler about appropriate care tips for a Warden of his size and age. You can typically find them in or around Decked Out 2! They can also provide you with advice on housing, or you can refer to how other citizens and Hermits are housing their Wardens - such as Scars pet Warden in the tower.
The cats are an entirely different issue. You could try desensitizing them to Bobby by having them in rooms next to one another, sort of like how you’d introduce a new cat by having the new one and one room and the old cat can smell them and get used to their scent before meeting them.
Side note: keep Bobby away from fishing rods
- The Seers
ADVERTISEMENTS
By Jamie
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Come by Tango's Citadel today to get some of the best baked goods on the server! Fellow Citizen, Azelea, has opened up a bakery and shall be catering the Hermitcitizen Masquerade Ball later this year. Don't miss the first week’s sale!
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Watcher issues?
Hello, there! I have experience avoiding Watchers and having them not be able to actually convert me. If any researchers, scientists, or people struggling with the Watchers want to come by, please do! I'll try my best to pass along what makes me unable to be converted.
Location: The small house in the birch forest near Grian's base
Owner: Fleur
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Calling out to all book lovers! This Friday we shall be meeting at Bdubs’ Moss Cafe to discuss our favourite books and give out any and all recommendations! Personally, I’m looking forward to ‘The Secret Life of Sunflowers’.
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Fun and Games
This week's fun and games are brought to you by Snuffy!
Crossword
Brain Teasers
In this game, there are four images of some sort and you need to figure out what each Brain Teaser is trying to say! For example, a brain teaser could be the word READ with lines above and below, and it would mean ‘read between the lines’. Have fun!
And that’s all for this issue folks! Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful week!
This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!
The Hermitcitizen Hub is still going strong! As of this week, those in charge are looking for applications to mod a potential minecraft server- more to test the waters and see how much interest there is than anything, but check the announcements channel nonetheless!
The Incident: Whats happened so far, and what to look out for
By AzureClouds
As many of you know by now, Grian and Scar have accidentally blown up Doc’s Tunnel Bore when they took a short break from building. While the Tunnel Bore had been tested and shown to be both Grian proof and Scar proof, it was not prepared, nor safe, for the two of them at the same time and it has been theorized by many that it is impossible to create a machine immune to the duo’s combined chaos.
The two soon attempted to fix it using their limited Redstone knowledge after a brief panic, mainly using photos of the Tunnel Bore from before the incident and experience watching other Redstoners building similar machines; they sadly failed after several attempts and opted to leave gifts instead! Amongst these gifts where diamonds, ScarLand merchandise and even TCG cards!
Unfortunately, when they showed Doc the destroyed Tunnel Bore on a tour of the Perimeter, he was not swayed by their gifts or numerous compliments, although they complimented his base and his redstone. Grian and Scar then flew out a pre-prepared escape hole, only narrowly avoiding Doc.
Although Doc enjoyed the ScarLand merch , especially the hats, he still decided that revenge must be taken against them, in the form of haunting the two trouble makers. He began by making an Update Skipper, a simplified version of the Update Suppressor to shrink Grian’s Nether portal to one block, and turning it sideways. Grian’s portal was invisible from approach, and according to inside sources, decided to keep it, and has not attempted to fix it. He has instead decided to take this opportunity to work on the back of the Crastle.
Afterwards, Doc began work on the Wither Reactor, an especially dangerous machine, after receiving five stacks of Wither skulls courtesy of Impulse. In addition to plans for using it for Concrete farming, he added a feature allowing him to collect blue skulls, as although they are rarer and more destructive, loose their extra properties once unloaded.
Soon after its construction, the Wither Reactor provided Doc with enough skulls, and he began placing them over ScarLand forming an ominous cloud over the “Happiest place on Hermitcraft.” Doc furthered his prank by teaming up with Bdubs, after realizing the latter had left horses to freely roam the area as revenge for the death of his first horse. They chose to challenge Scar to a TCG game, and whilst Bdubs and Scar went against each other in Docs arena, the Anvil Canon had been set to randomly launch anvils into the arena, several of them nearly taking out Scar, who was none the wiser, thanks to Bdubs and Docs quick cover ups.
Additionally, many of the citizens residing and working in Grian’s Base, as well as Scarland, have already temporarily relocated, and those who have not done so yet are advised to make plans to do so or prepare for hauntings in and around their places of residence and work.
Now onto other news below the cut!
Weekly Weather Report
By Virtual
Thursday - PARTLY CLOUDY, High tides expected on all shores. Strong currents may make water activities dangerous.
Friday - SUNNY, Mild earthquakes expected in the Shopping District. Watch for freed shulkers around The Entity.
Saturday - SUNNY, High tides continue. Great for surfing, bad for boats. Exercise caution when near oceans.
Sunday - SUNNY, Lovely day anticipated. Citizens advised to take a break and enjoy the outdoors.
Monday - CLOUDY, Thick fog expected across the entire server. Low visibility may make building dangerous.
Tuesday - WINDY, Winds expected to be concentrated near the Perimeter and may be technological in source. Citizens advised to stay off high ledges and watch for dragon drift.
Wednesday - RAINY, Scattered showers expected across the server. Expect to be unexpectedly drenched.
Gurhulk Begins Hermit Citizen Hub Build in Minecraft
Recorded by Cirrus, the Shoebill, written by Lydia
Hermit Citizen Hub member and builder Gurhulk has begun a project to construct a digital architectural version of the Hermit Citizen Hub through Minecraft. While the Hermit Citizen Hub did not previously have a set blueprint for a virtual building, it currently exists as a Discord Server for Hermitcraft viewers, artists, writers, musicians, builders, and engineers. This Discord Server was created by Tumblr user Ink-Ghoul after they had drawn up a Citizen I.D. card template for anyone wishing to create a fictional character to live on the Hermitcraft Server. Since April 11th, the Hermit Citizen Hub Discord Server has amassed approximately 625 members.
Creating a Hermit Citizen involves a few simple decisions, with participants choosing a name, species, occupation, and home base for their brainchild that they bring to the Server, in addition to determining a few Minecraft-related skills for said Citizen. These skills involve building, combat, engineering (Redstone), agility (movement), navigation (exploration), farming, mining, and prank execution. Afterward, an incredible amount of members have enjoyed throwing their Citizens into scenarios that could easily fit the tone of several genres of media and entertainment, including but not limited to prime-time comedy television shows, soap operas, teenage drama novels, workplace comedies, psychological thrillers, horror films, and fantasy serials.
While the creation of a Citizen to hypothetically live in the world of Hermitcraft may seem odd to those unfamiliar with making fan characters, those who have participated have stated that it is a deeply enriching experience for their inspiration to formulate extensive backstories, artwork, writing pieces, and thought-provoking character traits, as well as build interpersonal connections with other fans within this Server’s welcoming environment. The presence of Hermits is often inconsequential to many of the Citizens, as almost all of them have entirely separated arcs, homes, and personalities from their Affiliated Hermits.
The Hermit Citizen Hub Discord Server encompasses channels for artwork, writing pieces, music, and a brainstorming area for participants to ask for suggestions regarding their character creation. Perhaps one of the most significant implementations of the community center is the addition of the Citizen Connections. This feature has helped to kickstart a great number of stories for the majority of Hermit Citizens who are searching for their place among their fellow residents. Notable Citizen Connections Groups with high amounts of activity include the Birds of The Birdhouse, the Sculk Research Team, the Decked Out Crew, the staff of The Overseer, the Scarland Staff, and those affiliated with Watchers among many others.
Gurhulk’s Hermit Citizen is a robot named G.U.R. who works as a caretaker of his maker, Grumbot, living in his cave. He excels in engineering (Redstone) and building. He joined Hermitcraft in Season 7 and functions as a walking redstone torch, in addition to containing multiple decades of knowledge. He keeps a sample of the amethyst that infected the Hermatrix so that he may continue to analyze it. The design of Gurhulk’s Citizen is a humanoid robot standing at six feet tall with a red and gray color scheme and sleek mechanical frame, hearkening back to the days of Isaac Aasimov’s robot science fiction, especially that of Caliban, the archetypal tale of a robot grappling with its place in human society and the advancement of robots to fully sentient beings. G.U.R. arrived on our Discord Server on April 15th.
The Hermit Citizen Hub Build is not the first digital architectural representation of a structure on the Server. The previously completed Build was The Birdhouse, a highly detailed and meticulously crafted tree house with a fully decorated interior. The original concept art for The Birdhouse was drawn by Morph, and a fully realized Minecraft version of said Birdhouse was hand-crafted by Discord User Redfeather, creator of the laboratory technician, mob biologist, and animal behaviorist Citizen of the same name.
This Birdhouse includes several floors all with different purposes to be the quintessential artistic rendition of the Haven for the Avians. It includes a communal kitchen, infirmary and bird bath, living room, library, sleeping quarters with hammocks and beds, an observatory, a trellis, an outdoor cafe, a large community table at the very top with a beautifully colored stain-glass roof, and all of the luxuries an Avian could ever want. The inside is filled with couches, books, knick-knacks, study areas, plant life, bird toys, and bean bag chairs, and the outside includes private conversational areas, a tire swing, a parkour challenge, and landing pads for new and returning visitors.
To Gurhulk, the Hermit Citizen Hub is a place to interact with numerous wonderful people from the Hermitcraft fan community. Here, he was able to connect with them more so than he was through his Twitter page, finding this as the ideal community center of his escapades. The digital architecture of the actual Build is intended to appear similar to an inside marketplace, taking heavy inspiration from Greek architectural styles. Gurhulk states that he is “definitely going for the Big Quartz Build,” as the idea had come across him during one of his work days. He did not note any specific inspirations for the project, though he had previously seen The Birdhouse. With the use of the Immersive Portals modification, Gurhulk plans to make the structure on a large scale from the inside to represent the various channels on the Server. Therefore, its interior will be much larger than its exterior. He sees this location as a place for Hermit Citizens to come together outside of their affiliated bases, as well as being a gathering place for various groups such as The Overseer staff, SSS, and SUS, among multiple other groups.
With the attitude of taking one step at a time and seeking ways to enhance his work, he sees this as a perfect opportunity to show how he has improved over time. The project has been in the works since Wednesday, May 24th, when he asked for other members’ input about color ideas and began putting together the modifications he would need for the structure. On the following day, he confirmed that the other members would enjoy the use of the Greek-inspired architectural style with a blue and cyan color palette, and began building its front porch section. Modifications for the project have also been implemented, including the Create Modification, Chipped, Immersive Portals, and MrCrayfish’s Furniture Modification, along with a few others. Due to the number of modifications being used, Gurhulk is uncertain about the feasibility of an efficient world download but stated that he would consider it when the project is finished.
Gurhulk’s representation of the Hermit Citizen Hub in architectural format is one we intensely look forward to, as it takes an analytical and innovative individual to translate these features of such a large online space to a physical version within Minecraft, and a creator with an unfathomable amount of gumption to present the result as an intended location for the entire population of the Server. In addition to a description of the overall beginning stages, the community has received two photographs from Gurhulk of the initial progress of the Hermit Citizen Hub Build. These photographs depict the front porch area and the front balcony. These photographs were taken on May 25th, May 26th, and May 30th.
Gurhulk welcomes all feedback from his fellow Server members. We wish him the best of luck as he continues to show his building prowess in his newest constructive venture!
Astrology Corner
By Nes
Look to the stars for guidance, for they hold the secrets to the universe… and right now the universe is telling me all the star signs will visit a citizen shop at some point this week. Which one? Find out here in the Astrology Corner!*
Aries: Its been a while since you’ve had your eyes checked out, perhaps invest in a visit to the eye doctor?
Taurus: Everyone needs someone to talk to, this week be sure to take care of yourself and invest in Glowberry therapy!
Gemini: The mines are dangerous this week, consider shopping for your deepslate and glowberries at The Quarrys Crop to avoid unnecessary dangers.
Cancer: You may discover a mysterious creature soon, be sure to get them checked out at cloud’s office to ensure you can care for them properly!
Leo: Do not trust cats trying to sell you soup, it never ends well… If they try to sell you clothes those are ok to buy! Probably…
Virgo: Prosthetics will become a big part of your life in the coming days, perhaps invest in a custom design and fir with On The Move.
Libra: Remember last night? No? Ah, well you ordered a lot of things online - don’t worry the 10k Blocks delivery service will have all 187 parcels at your door by the end of the week!
Scorpio - While visiting Scarland this week you’ll get down to a half a heart due to HotGuy, but fear not Painted Wings has tons of tasty baked goods to help you recover!
Sagittarius - You’ve passed the vibe check, something tells me any medicine from the pharmacy will be especially cheap this week…
Capricorn: You’ll attend a grand opening for The Lush Cave Bakery, while there you’ll get a special surprise - a free pastry!
Aquarius: I see a lot of injuries in your future, perhaps invest in a good doctor at the Copper Clinic?
Pisces: Your popularity will skyrocket this week as every store in the server will suddenly decide you are the ideal customer, good luck!
*The Overseer is not responsible if your citizen follows this advice and it ends poorly, additionally this is advice for your CITIZEN not you irl - stay safe!
Soup Cats, Legit or Souptaster?
By Nes
Recently opened by the Pearlescentmoon affiliates with locations across the server near any and all Twinkly Trash outlets, Soup Cats is a surprisingly punny store selling a variety of goods of the soup variety, including soup themed clothing. Although innocent at first glance, upon further inspection, some anomalies arise. The most pressing being that of all the workers being cats or cat hybrids, which seems quite normal until you consider these people were not cat hybrids last week. Join reporter and writer Nes as she visits one of these locations to uncover the truth beneath the soup.
Upon first entering their shopping district location, I was immediately overwhelmed by the cozy yet chaotic nature of the interior, followed shortly by the equally chaotic nature of two workers named Zera and Larimar. Although it took some adjustment, I did find myself enjoying the atmosphere after some time, especially the cozy seating and cat cafe vibes that came with the various felines lounging in and around the establishment.
Before placing my order, I had the chance to speak with Head Chef Zera and Head of Marketing Larimar. Apparently, they had been expecting me. During a conversation laced with soup-based puns and general excitement for the store being in the paper, I was unable to learn much outside of my already existing knowledge on the establishment. Regardless, I enjoyed my time with them both immensely and highly recommend visiting just to talk to them and all the other staff!
This article isn’t about the staff and their amazing hospitality. This is about the soup and the secrets that lie within. Upon Larimar’s suggestion, I liked and soupscribed to Pearlescentmoon before ordering the mystery soup, as suggested by Zera. After ordering, they assured me that the meal was completely safe, which did not bode well for me, but I carried on despite my hesitance.
The soup I received was deceivingly appetizing in appearance, and I was left alone to enjoy my meal. Interestingly, there was a faint glow radiating from the otherwise plain looking potato soup. I would be lying if I claimed I wasn’t slightly concerned for my well being as I took my first bite, but despite the anomalies, it tasted fine! In fact, I’d be willing to bet it was the best soup I had ever had.
Overall, I would rate the experience a 10/10, with amazing service staff and even better food. Not only that, but as I left, I was able to buy myself my very own soup themed shirt! I had a wonderful time and meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow*
*Editor's Note: The Overseer would like to apologize, it seems the author of this article was turned into a cat and has left to pursue a career at Soup Cats. We wish them the best!
Lost and Found
By Virtual
The following items were collected from across the server over the past week. If you would like to report an item missing, or if you recognize any of the below items as your own, please contact us at [email protected]*
*not a real email address
Item 1: A lodestone compass, Found in a pile of barrels in front of of Bdubs’ castle.
The pile was eleven barrels high at its tallest and seventeen barrels wide at its widest. The barrels were completely empty except for a barrel at the center, which contained a single lodestone compass. Following the compass led to a bedrock pocket in the perimeter, which did not contain a lodestone but did contain Item 2. The compass is now spinning endlessly with no apparent target in sight. If the compass is not collected, it will be returned to its pile of barrels for Bdubs to handle as he sees fit.
Item 2: A pair of sunglasses with six lenses, found on the floor of the Perimeter.
These glasses, when held up to the eye, allow a player to view set locations in six different servers, with each server corresponding to a different lens. Citizens reported splitting headaches and double vision for up to an hour after use. The glasses have been placed inside an ender chest for safekeeping, and will be removed only upon request for return.
Item 3: A bag of seven polyhedral dice, found on the roof of Cleo’s megabase.
When one die is taken out of the bag, another die of identical shape but different color takes its place. There seems to be no end to the amount of dice the bag can produce, as careful tests (read: holding it upside down for an hour) have demonstrated the bag’s regenerative capabilities to be mildly impossible. If the bag belongs to you, make sure not to slip on the dice-covered floor when you come to pick it up.
The Museum Situation
By Ilea
A few weeks ago, we here at The Overseer provided you with a comprehensive guide to Cleo's fabulous collection. This week we are covering the escalation of the "museum situation."
You may ask what “museum situation” means, and I am glad to say that it is my name for the current and past events surrounding all museums on Hermitcraft. That’s right, there is more than just Cleo’s collection, and this is less a guide for the rest and more of a history rundown on them.
Starting with Cub’s museum, we are happy to inform you that there are a few parkour courses inside and outside the facility. Another great part of it is the experience that it provides you when getting from the third to the second floor with the use of slime blocks. Just this time, we encourage you to jump from the barriers.
Regarding the exponents, Cub has collected all of the easter eggs from the Easter Egg Hunt, including the Gold Eggs used in the final round to determine the champion. The redaction of The Overseer would like to remind you that said Egg Hunt took place over a year ago.
Another fine thing you may find in that museum is an interactive music display, where you can listen to important music discs from Hermitcraft history. For example, “The Ballad of Joe Hills” is there. Most of those discs, as well as multiple heads of Empires members, were collected from the Christmas area.
Speaking of collected heads, due to the kingmaking and dungeoncreating nature of BdoubleO, he has his own display in the museum that consists of his head, his original bed, and a crescent moon made by Cub to represent the nature of the exhibit.
Hermit history is not the only thing collected in the museum as we heard that there are some rare ores on display there.
For now, the last part of the exhibition is a small stand for King Ren that involves some old tomatoes that were thrown at him, a statue representing him, and the Invite to the Vault Party that started the downfall of monarchy.
If you want to take a more comprehensive look at the story surrounding King Ren, we are happy to inform you that across the road from Cub’s museum, you can see the Royal museum focuses only on that part of our history. Cleo managed to find absolute rarities to put in said museum, including a replica of the actual King’s throne and a replica of the cage in which Ren was put after the King’s Vault events.
Aside from those showstopping replicas on the parter, we can find all of the crystals and infamous pumpkins from the King’s Quest time. Next to them, there is a representation of the rewards from it. On that same level, we can find a head of the good King Ren, a replica of the tiny crown, and right beside them is an entire exhibit dedicated to the Vault Party, which has the original “No, No, No” music disc, the Invite, a crystal from the quest, and head of one of twelve Xisumas that are to blame for said party.
On the other side of the throne, we have a representation of the Bad King Ren’s rule, including Gigapies™, Royal Emeralds, affirmations written by the King Ren himself, armours representing those given to the contestants in King’s Vault, and the original Sword of Lady Cleo from that event.
Upstairs, members of King’s Court are represented in small displays. With them, there are original diamond glasses that belonged to Lady Cleo.
The last exhibit shows the further story of the now only figurative monarchy on Hermitcraft.
We are glad to inform you that both museums are looking for donations both in the form of items and diamonds. We are also happy to inform you that Jevin already is trying to profit off this and that the original King Ren’s netherite armor from the King’s Vault event is still on display in Pearl’s Trash Shop.
After the situation escalates a bit, we will give you another short rundown on the museums with further developments in both collections.
ADVERTISEMENTS
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hOtGuY’s Gify Shop is officially open! I know we citizens haven’t had the best relationship with our server vigilante, most often being used as target practice, but who wouldn’t want a signature hOtGuY bow to shoot back at him with?
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Were you left unemployed in the wake of Grian and Scar’s Incident? Do you know how to not burn down the house with an oven? Good! The Lush Cave Bakery in The Citadel is looking for employees. Please contact Azelea for more information.
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With the addition of both Cub and Cleo’s museums to the server, the Gardening Club is hosting a tour! If you see something you recognize, don’t worry, they would never steal anything and probably just found something similar. Leave your roses at the door for free entry!
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At least WE at the SSS never go into homes uninvited. Our services respect private property even if we see the phantoms giving citizens extra tight hugs. All members of the Scar Safety Services are willing to wait for you to invite them in so they can insure no deaths will happen on the job nor afterwards.
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Fun and Games
This week's fun and games are brought to you by Lydia, Snuffy, and Azure!
Comic by Snuffy
Word Search by Lydia
Word Search by Lydia
Coloring Page by Lydia
Brain Teasers by Azure
And that’s all for this issue folks! Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful week!
