On top of streamlining my thought process, live broadcast news also equipped me with another annoying habit: a way of perceiving options. As in: we always have options.
But.
I also believe we're undeniable experts at railroading our thoughts. I believe we can be incredibly narrow-minded in our assessments.
And I think we do all this naturally.
I can't do this.
There's just no way.
You see this every day. Our critical judgments are often ruled by emotion and preconceptions rather than by logic and reason. You see emotion and preconceptions are pretty much just as good (if not better) at spinning narratives that make sense. That feel right.
Of course live broadcast isn't about what you feel. I learned that lesson real quick. Because I was terrified.
Because I came to believe the job for which I was hired was beyond my ability.
The emotion was paralyzing.
To move beyond that, though, and keep my job, I had to master my job. No matter how I was feeling. And I had to embrace whatever it took to make that happen. Even if I had to endure days of mistakes and insecurity.
So.
I set the bar for myself like this:
Whatever the mistake is, never make it twice.
Whatever the mistake is.
Never.
Make it.
Twice.
Since I felt so far out of my depth, I knew there wasn't a way to avoid mistakes. So there wasn’t any point to the anxiety of trying to avoid them.
Therefore: I'd have to run into them at full speed as if everything I was doing was the right thing to do. I had to invoke a confidence that wasn’t warranted.
It was pretty much learning to embrace my mistakes.
Instead of embracing the anxiety of making one.
For that first pair of weeks, though, the experience was very much
I can't do this.
There's just no way.
And had I lived in that emotion, had I firmly set up shop there, I would never have mastered my job. Could not... have done it.
It’s a lesson that’s followed me throughout my career... and one that finds new expression in other areas of life. Call it a commitment of sorts. A commitment to never being stuck. Never being boxed in. Never being without options.
And in that way... always maintaining my own agency. Always assuring that the choice, whatever the choice is...
Is mine.