ultimately what happened with [redacted] was that i told her that you cannot use "but i love you" as an excuse to hurt me & cross my explicitly-stated boundaries. boundaries are HUGE for me & i never mince words when setting them because it's really important to me that they are clear. if i say to you THREE TIMES "please stop talking to me" & you can't respect it? if i block you on one platform & you just move right along to another, demanding access to me so you can continue to insult me? it's almost impossible to come back from that, because i know i can't trust you to listen to me. trust is broken & i can't fuck around with people i can't trust, trust is all or nothing for me & i don't know how to change that. she can call me a hypocrite if she wants, she can view the history of our relationship however she wants. it's bullshit to tell someone they have to put up with you berating & harassing them because you "love" them, it's fucking bullshit.