#pex toast

[lostlegendaerie]

back at it again with the "someone showed up on my doorstep and asked if I had a spare bed for a night or two" and while I do wish she talked 70% less than she does, having someone else in my space IS making me deep clean (with her help! I won't let her pay me I'm just asking her to like. load my dishwasher) and organize my house so

8/10, being charitable is guilt-tripping me into tackling Laundry Chair

[lostlegendaerie]

york (the blorbo ever) for the blorbo bingo

see I was excited to fill this out and then I saw the one in the top row of "I wish I could save you" and now I'm having like my 81st annual complete breakdown over York's death, speculation under the cut

like. I do love the AI all so much but I love them as like. parasites. I love the low grade level of horror of having something else living in your head, and we SAW what Omega did to Maine and even how Eta and Iota fucked with Carolina and dear GOD what Epsilon did to Wash

And I do think that Delta and Theta did stuff to York and North; but specifically, the question I love to ask in my fanfiction is this.

Who was it who turned on a ship full of people they had known for years, speaking to no one else but Texas about their concerns, all to try to rescue and reconnect with the Alpha - Delta, or York?

I just wonder how much the AI in his head slanted his perception of reality. When I first watched the show, hearing Carolina's line of "but you can't trust me" during the elevator fight I thought it was her acknowledging her own flaws. It's not. It's her grief at the person she loved the most (because it was mutual, it always was) excluding her from what might have been the most important mission of all. It was her accusation that after everything, York had turned his back on humans to save an AI.

So I ask. Who was it who made that call? Delta, or York?

Regardless of the answer, the outcome is the same. He failed. He saved nobody, crashed a ship and got his lover killed. And I'm going to spend the rest of my life giving him another chance, and another, and another, to make it right.

[lostlegendaerie]

my (new) workplace is a ton bigger than the fabric store i used to work in and some of my coworkers are dating each other so i get the Real Time Stuff that happens in developing romantic relationships and with one coworker in particular (a really sweet, very very new age hipster sort of Vietnamese woman my age) the staggeringly low standards is really apparent. every single thing about this dude, from the fact that on their first kind of date he kept trying to put his hands on her to a polo shirt which i am about 60% sure has his ponysona (yes, that) embroidered on it and not a single one of my straight female friends see any of these aspects of this disgusting, leaves-her-on-read-but-also-insists-on-kissing-her-even-when-she-says-no-because-she-has-a-cold white guy as a red flag. i know i’ve lived in a homeschooled one boyfriend for one month gay bubble but y’all... it’s so fucking bad. IT’S SO FUCKING BAD.

[lostlegendaerie]

hey guys just an update that the last chapter of Throw Away the Key will be posted this Thursday, June 21st but i will actually be out of town visiting family in San Diego so I won’t be on Tumblr until around the 30th. Therefore, I won’t be able to post the link to the last chapter (I’ve got it saved as a draft on AO3 and will be posting that from my phone but I don’t use the tumblr app bc I rely on blacklisting to avoid serious triggers)

Thanks as always for your support, and reminder that I’m always on my Twitter (@Legendaerie) or on Discord (Legendaerie#8174)

[lostlegendaerie]

right so now that everything is settled i can admit that Yours Fucking Truly quit her old job before her new one actually had hired her, but it all worked out so things will be okay! probably! but its full time in a debt collection call center and also ive spent all morning dry heaving from three weeks off my anti-anxiety medication and also Trying To Get Hired so yeah! i actually had to stop writing this to run to the restroom again! i’m going to die 8D

[lostlegendaerie]

getting some star wars feels a day late, but my relationship with the prequels has always been really... personal. i grew up with them (was born in 1993, watched them obsessively for the next ten years since we got about two DVDs a year at most) and yeah its def got some moments of cringe but like. any time i try to talk about what these movies mean to me, at all, im always on the defensive.

now that i’m more established in fandom i can dig in my heels whenever someone shits all over something i love, but it hurts that i can’t really go back and enjoy a story that meant so much to me - or talking about it at all with anyone else who likes the series - without having a prepared speech. (i usually focus on the visual design, because fuck you the costumes and sets and when used the prosthetics are still goddamn cool and showcase such a staggering variety of cultures and aesthetics. i tend to leave out the part about being the gifted child of a horribly abused and self-sacrificing mother and identifying hard with anakin’s themes of isolation, idolization, corrupting influences and the weight of being the Chosen One and the eternal fuck-up crybaby all at once, because by that point in time i’ve already been cut off about the CGI or the ‘acting’ like it wasnt the shitty directing and writing of lucas being an unguided largely unfettered egoist surrounded by talented people doing their best, gee i can’t imagine what kind of male nerd would overlook that aspect of the prequels huh)

its worth to talk about art in any form from the standpoint of craft and intent and everything like that but sometimes people just like things that aren’t masterpieces, like white castle or hayden christensen in a mullet. let people get excited over sub-par things,  life is so fucking miserable anyway.

[lostlegendaerie]

hey i just wanna take a moment to thank all 2.5k+ of you guys that follow me. i know it’s been a really slow (and sometimes very, very bitter) blog this year between retail work and politics and the PTSD nightmare that was r/vb s15 and... i just wanna thank the guys who have still stuck around. hell, even the ones that used to follow me and moved on (and won’t see this but whatever)

i’ve always lived my life as a person who wants to do things for other people, who wants to help them smile when things are hard, and i feel like i’ve not been able to be that version of myself much this year. and as 2017 draws to a close, and i look back at how my optimism and compassion have faltered in the wake of the shitstorm that has been this year (on a global scale but even as small as agonizing fallouts with close fandom friends) and... i wish i’d done a little better by you all. i wish i could be here more, interacting with you guys. i wish i could create more content for you to enjoy. god knows we all need a friend now.

but for those of you who are still here, who still are curious to see what new things i come up with or share with you guys, i wanna thank you. truly, sincerely, thank you. and i hope that i can continue to create things that can warm you in your dark times and add color to your good times.

[lostlegendaerie]

Mrs. Sterling (the interactive Twine story I did as part of the Telltale Writer’s Workshop at GDC this year) just broke 200 views! Thank you all so much!

Link is [here]