Before DB even had a chance to process the words he’d just had thrown at him, he heard his own voice say, “A…daughter? No…no, I don’t…we don’t…” He lowered his gaze to the table, shaking his head slowly. “We tried, Vyn.”
He looked back up and met Kelvyn’s eyes again, and he knew that the pain in his own showed just how badly he wished it were true.
“Exactly, Darien. We tried, and it worked.”
The older man resumed shaking his head. “The doctors…they told us…said it would be impossible.” He still couldn’t wrap his head around this possibility. “Between your meds and my…”breeding”…they said we couldn’t…” His tone was bitter now, filled with resentment. For the professionals that had dashed their dreams, for himself, for everyone who’d ever gotten what they wanted, for everything.
“They were wrong, Darien.”
“Doctors aren’t wrong…said so y’rself…”
“Then I was wrong. Please, Darien, just consider.”
DB could tell that Kelvyn was getting desperate, so he decided to humor him for a few more minutes before leaving and catching another cab back to his hotel. “Fine. If we’ve got a daughter, then where is she? Why ain’t she here?”
“I…I don’t know where she is…I put her up for adoption after she was born…”
DB’s features flared in something akin to anger. “You gave her away?” He knew all too well what being an orphan felt like when neither of his parents were dead. “All that money from yer parents, and ya couldn’t’a used it t’ take care a’ one little girl?!”
“Darien, please…” the other said meekly, shying away from the outburst.
“Don’t you “Darien, please” me!! Unless you’ve got some plan t’ get ‘er back, I’m goin’ home.” DB stood abruptly and stormed out. Yeah, he’d made a scene, but hopefully he’d made a point, too.
Kelvyn stared at his ex’s back as he stormed out. He felt tears prick his eyes and looked down at the empty table. They’d never even ordered dinner.
Dinner. Kelvyn had suggested that he spill over dinner.
DB sighed and ran his hand through his cropped hair for what was probably the thousandth time that night. Kelvyn had assured him repeatedly that he hadn’t even touched him the night of the breakup, he’d only yelled. Of course, this wasn’t much consolation, because whatever he had said was bad enough to make the love of his life walk out.
He checked his reflection one last time before heading out to the front of the hotel to wait for his taxi.
The cab ride was another experience he would be sure to strike from his memory as soon as possible. He never had enjoyed the company of strangers, and the silence was almost unbearable. The cabbie didn’t even bother to turn on the radio.
Their arrival at the diner was almost a relief until DB remembered why he was there. Once his fare was paid and he had awkwardly muttered a soft, “Thank ya,” he stared up at the building and approached it.
He knew Kelvyn was already inside; he could see him through the windows that acted as walls. The smaller man was switching between anxiously fiddling with his napkin and pulling at his tie. With a deep breath and a sigh, Darien steeled his resolve and walked through the doors and straight to the table where Kelvyn was sitting, brushing past the hostess and waiters silently.
“Hey, Vyn,” he said with a nervous smile, causing his companion to shoot up out of his chair and nearly knock it over. A handshake and an uncomfortable hug later, the two men sat. “Y’know, the princes said they were “pretty psyched” when I told ‘em I was comin’ t’ see you.”
Kelvyn nodded absently as DB continued to try and break the ice. This was it, and he was terrified. This was a huge, life-changing piece of news, and he was just a bit too late delivering it. Even now he couldn’t think of a way to soften the blow. He couldn’t just come out and say, “We have a daughter.”
…
“Kyan had a recital at Terra’s…” DB paused and stared blankly at Kelvyn’s face. “What?”
The shorter man was startled out of his thoughts. “Huh?”
“What’d you just say?”
“I…I said something…?”
“Sounded…sounded like somethin’ ‘bout a daughter?”
“Oh…”
“I didn’t know you had a kid, congrats! What’s ‘er name?”
Kelvyn could tell that Darien was concerned about him–how could he not be after the way their phone call had gone? But he wasn’t ready to drop the bomb on him just yet; not when he looked so relieved to see him.
“Vyn, what’s goin’ on? What do I not know? What happened that night? What’d I do? Did I hurt you at all? Stars, Vyn, I’m sorry; I never wanted any’a this to happen; no wonder you left.” He sighed and ran a hand through his short hair.
As Kelvyn listened, he couldn’t help the guilt that clutched his heart. This situation was just awful. He couldn’t stand the thought of keeping Darien out of the loop for even another second, but telling him something so seriously personal on the side of the road just wouldn’t be fair.
DB was still muttering to himself and pacing when the vice on Kelvyn’s heart loosened enough to allow speech. “Darien…calm down before you tear your hair out…” he said softly, stopping him on his next pass. The tears brimming taller man’s eyes nearly winded him.
“Kelvyn, what did I do that night? What happened?” he asked slowly, gripping Kelvyn’s shoulders and meeting his gaze, his own eyes blazing with fear. “Did I hurt you?”
Kelvyn had never heard his ex-fiancé speak so clearly in all the time he’d known him, and that fact alone hit him like a punch to the gut. Darien wasn’t just scared, he was absolutely terrified.
"'S that what I came out here for? So we could talk 'bout nothin'?"
"Why don't you ask yourself? You were there, weren't you?" Kelvyn replied, his voice finally picking up more than just a little irritation.
There was period of silence, and Kelvyn worried that DB had hung up.
"No."
Kelvyn paused as he took in this claim and raised an eyebrow with a bit of a laugh. "What do you mean? You were there, you ended it."
DB's breathing seemed to hitch for a moment before he said, "Maybe I was there...but I wasn't...there..."
As DB's meaning finally began to register in Kelvyn's mind, he froze. "You don't mean...oh, no...I'm so sorry...I had no...no idea...I didn't mean...I wasn't trying to...I'm so, so sorry… I just...I just thought...you seemed so...I just wanted...wanted to...to t-tell you about her…I didn’t...I didn’t know...”
“Vyn, what’re you talkin’ about?” DB asked, worried by the other man’s tone. “Who’d ya wanna tell me about?”
“We could’ve...she could’ve…” Kelvyn’s voice was muffled now, as he had covered his mouth. “But now…oh, Darien...”
“Kelvyn.”
He finally went silent.
“What’s got you so worked up? Who’s this she you keep goin’ on about?”
Kelvyn took a breath and sighed shakily. Darien had pulled out his best diction for this; he was genuinely concerned.
"Well, I thought you knew, but..." Kelvyn gulped nervously. He took a deep, shaky breath, mentally preparing himself to reveal such an important, life changing detail to the man on the other end. “Darien, we have a--!”
Kelvyn’s declaration was cut short as his phone beeped loudly, alerting him to an incoming call.
“A what, Vyn?”
“A-another call; I’m so sorry, Darien. Give me just a few seconds.”
“Actually, Vyn, my phone’s gonna die soon; I’ll just send a picture of the sign. Tell me all about it when ya get here.”
A short tone sounded to alert Kelvyn to the fact that the call had been ended before he checked to see who else was calling.
After staring at the screen for what seemed like too long, he answered on the last ring. “What do you want this time?” he hissed. “Calling to ruin my life again? Was it not enough for you the other thousand times? Stars, Sesshi; can’t you just leave me alone? I’ve got more than enough to deal with right now without adding you to the mix!”
With a huff, Kelvyn hung up, ignoring the looks he was getting from the people who had been waiting in the lobby for the elevator. He knew he’d made at least a small scene, but he didn’t care. How could he worry about something as small as this when he’d just found out that the circumstances of his breakup with Darien were entirely different from what he had originally thought, as well as extremely unique? There were so many things he needed to tell his ex that he wasn’t sure he could count them all.
First thing, though, he had to go find the man before he decided to stop waiting around.
DB glared at his shoes as he walked, alone, with his fists shoved into his pockets.
He recollected what had happened within the past hour.
After getting into the car with Cato and Kelvyn, things were, at the very least, tense. It was for this very reason that DB couldn't find himself angry with Cato for attempting to lighten up the mood by bringing up an argument that the darker man had held many times with his ex.
When he entered the banter to keep himself from cutting ties there, things escalated to playful shouting. When all three settled and quieted, they sat in the car, silent besides the song on the radio, and Cato made one last joke that made DB too angry to stay.
"If you fight like that over somethin' so small as that, it's no wonder you broke up."
He shook the echoing sentence away and pulled his phone out as it rang, not really needing to check the Caller ID to know that it was Kelvyn. He sighed and hit 'ignore.'
He knew that Kelvyn would probably be concerned, but, if he was being completely honest with himself, that idea wasn't too bad in his opinion. Yes, he knew it was rude to visit someone and then leave them to worry over you, though he really couldn't help not caring. He'd been without Kelvyn for years. He'd missed him every day for hours and hours. Kelvyn could do without knowing where he was for a good thirty minutes or so.
Cato, on the other hand, had been there. He'd watched Kelvyn as he'd grown into this newer, calmer person. He'd gotten to help him adapt from palace extravagances. He'd had no right to make that remark.
The redhead didn't know anything about DB aside from his name. He had no idea what had gone down between the two men before everything went out the window. They'd had so much grief thrown at them, there at the end, it was a miracle they'd managed to still go to work every day.
There had been fights, yes. Lots of fights--tons of them. They'd argued over the stupidest things, DB remembered with a wry smile.
Kelvyn would be so upset when he came over if DB didn't already have his favorite show on the DVR, ready to go with popcorn and sodas.
DB would bellyache and moan for at least an hour if Kelvyn didn't order the right toppings on their pizza, especially if it was right after a visit to the latter's parents.
For years, their arguments had been silly things that DB had often looked forward to...there at the end though...
Things had gotten serious. Very serious. They'd been planning things for ages, only to have their goal shot down with all of their dreams. Their perfect life had shattered, leaving behind the sharp edges of reality.
They would go for days without texting each other about anything personal. They'd stopped staying over at each other's houses. It had been like the time DB had used Kelvyn's table to replace a light bulb, only for the whole thing to splinter underneath him.
They'd been broken in the worst possible way, ripped away from the only thing they'd wanted at the time.
But they'd been picking up the pieces. They'd been fixing it. They'd been trying.
And then, one day, after one particularly intense argument, the puzzle they'd been striving so hard to find all the pieces to had been torn apart and flushed down the toilet all at once. And it was all DB's fault.
It was his fault because he hadn't sought out a way to contact Kelvyn in the weeks after the abrupt breakup. He'd thrown his phone in frustration the night it happened, so it hadn't been likely that he'd be getting any sort of calls from anyone. Rather than try to keep things from coming further unglued, DB had skipped work for a week.
Even when he'd gone back he hadn't been himself. His flute had gone untouched, and he hadn't shown any sort of interest in getting a new phone to replace his broken one.
When his phone rang again he huffed and pulled it out once more, glancing around for some sort of reason as to why he should or shouldn't answer it. Seeing a directional sign and realizing that he couldn't read the words, he decided that picking up would be the best option.
"Yeah?" One hand came up to rub over the scar on his lip, a nervous habit.
"Are you alright, Darien? You know Cato didn't mean what he said."
DB somehow managed to keep himself from groaning at mention of the redhead. "'M fine. Just ain't sure where 'm at, exactly."
"Darien..." Kelvyn sighed, exasperation tinting his tone. "You should have just stayed with us." He was obviously frustrated, but also concerned.
"Thought we were startin' over, Vyn. Wouldn't exactly be a new beginnin' if I was already livin' with ya," DB joked lightly, though there was an underlying hint of bitterness to his voice. "S'not like I'd know how t' get t' your place, either."
"Well, then it's a good thing that I know where I'm going around here." Kelvyn smiled when he heard DB chuckle. "Where are you? Are there any landmarks around?" he asked.
DB heard the jingling of keys and a ding that he could only distinguish as an elevator. "There's a sign," he said in response to Kelvyn's second question. "'Can't read it, but it's here."
"Well, is there anything else nearby? An odd building, or some sort of strange...something?" Kelvyn questioned once more.
"I ain't stupid, Vyn. I know what a landmark is."
There was a pause and a sigh. "I understand you're upset, but there is no reason for that kind of attitude."
DB scoffed. "No reason, huh? Why's that?"
Kelvyn paused for a moment and DB could hear the gears turning in his mind. "You're acting ridiculous," he finally said.
"I'm bein' ridiculous? You ain't said more than a hundred words t' me since I got here, 'n' now yer tryna act like nothin' happened!!"
"Darien, I told you, that's just how Cato is. He didn't mean anything by it."
"That ain't what I'm talkin' about, 'n' you know it."
"Then what are you talking about?"
DB had to fight not to throw his phone. "Both you an' him're throwin' it around, actin' like it was no big thing..." he eventually growled out. "'S that what I came out here for? So we could talk 'bout nothin'?"
"Why don't you ask yourself? You were there, weren't you?" Kelvyn replied, his voice finally picking up more than just a little irritation.
There was period of silence, and Kelvyn worried that DB had hung up.
Kelvyn felt chills run down the back of his neck at the sound of DB's voice. He sounded so calm. So casual.
He turned around after taking a fraction of a second to compose himself and, though the smile on his face suddenly wanted to drop, he kept it in place. "Hello," he greeted politely, but he could feel the air get tighter.
Had talking to DB always been so awkward?
"It...it's great seein' you again, Kelvyn," DB managed after a moment. When did his mouth get so dry? As he finally worked up the courage to meet the shorter man's eyes he found himself winded.
Kelvyn's response wasn't much other than a nervously mumbled agreement as DB looked to the guy standing next to him.
"Who's this?" DB asked after a while, breaking the awkward silence that had set in as he and Cato had looked each other over.
"Cato," the bulkier man introduced himself, sticking out a hand with a curt nod.
"He's part of the family that I was telling you about," Kelvyn added.
"I'm bettin' you're DB?"
"The one an' only," he answered as he reached out to grab the proffered hand. "Me an' Kelvyn go way back; we were...we were pretty close..." he said with a sigh, his heart clenching painfully as he let go of Cato's hand.
"Engaged, from what I gather."
DB felt a lump form in his throat as he remembered the day after their breakup. It had been so empty in his apartment that day. There hadn't been any hope of visitors. No surprise apology pizza. The princes hadn't even called.
Of course, he supposed he'd deserved it.
"Listen, Vyn...b'fore things get more confusin'..." he took a deep breath and offered his best smile to the dark-haired male. "'M sorry. That day...a bad memory...foggy...but bad."
Kelvyn felt his throat tighten further at the old nickname and the mention that the end of their relationship was foggy to him. How had DB forgotten anything about that day? He nodded for the other to continue.
"I know 'm just kickin' up a bunch'a dust an' all, but really...I came to fix things. Maybe work somethin' out, put this all behind us?" DB watched Kelvyn's jaw clench and then relax. Did that still mean what it used to? Was he considering it, or was he changing his mind? Was he angry?
When Kelvyn finally composed himself enough, he let out a short sigh. "Let's just..." he paused to find the wording. "I'm sure we've both changed. Let's get to know each other again before we bring...that up."
The tallest of the three nodded once and took a breath before offering a smile and reaching for Kelvyn's hand. "Missed ya, Vyn." After a single shake, he pulled his hand away and looked between Cato and Kelvyn. "Where to now?" he questioned, trying to change the subject. "Told the hotel I'd be there around three to check in."
"Hotel?" Kelvyn didn't realize he'd said it aloud until the other men looked at him.
"Yeah," DB answered, slightly confused by Kelvyn's reaction. "Y'know, that one--what's it called? 'S, like, a name 'r somethin'. 'S right off the highway, on the beach. S'pos'ta be pretty fancy," he said with a shrug.
DB's description only confused Kelvyn more, but Cato was nodding along. "The Sierra?" the redhead asked.
"Prob'ly."
"That place costs a fortune, Darien." Kelvyn's tone was a bit scolding, but DB could see the small amount of hurt in his eyes. "You could have just stayed with us."
"Nah. When the princes heard I was gonna come see ya, oughta've seen 'em. They bugged the Queen for a week. Made 'er pay for it all. 'Course, 's'not like she was gonna let me pay for it myself."
"She paid for the whole trip?" he asked in disbelief.
"Sure did. B'sides, wouldn't wanna bug ya at your place."
Though DB's sentiment was a nice one, Kelvyn found himself more than just slightly disappointed.
"We're s'pos'ta be startin' over, anyway, right? Wouldn't be doin' it right if I was already stayin' over," he nudged his ex playfully. "C'mon, Vyn. 'S no big deal," he smiled widely at him and ruffled his hair, off-setting his glasses a tad. "Cato, right? You drivin'? Or did Vynnie finally hafta get behind the wheel?"
With that, DB scooped up his bags and the trio walked toward the airport's entrance, the tallest of them feeling a bit of weight lift off of his shoulders. The first step was out of the way, but the marathon was by no means over.
DB held his arms over his head and yawned before looking around as he grabbed his single suitcase from the carousel where a multitude of others continued to pass him.
His eyes were searching for someone specific.
He cringed slightly at the memory of the last time he’d seen the man that he was looking for. I was so awful, I can’t believe he actually wanted to set this up, he thought to himself, heading past the loads of people meeting their loved ones. Sighing, he rolled his eyes and raised his hand up to scratch the inside of his ear with one finger.
What a plane ride that had been. Overbearing stewards, uncomfortable seats, and that constant nagging as he remembered the last text he’d received before the flight.
[Text] I can’t wait for you to meet my family.
Family? Did Kelvyn still have the same definition of family? Did he have friends for DB to meet, or was it more than that? Had Kelvyn moved on? Started a new life?
Well, ’s'not like I could blame ‘im.
All in all, he could say that the flight hadn’t been the most relaxing. He hadn’t even been able to sleep through it because of all of the stupidly silly memories that had flooded his mind.
He smiled as another came to mind, then shook his head. He shouldn’t get his hopes up; for all he knew, Kelvyn could have brought this “family” with him. He needed to prepare himself for the worst.
Letting a small sigh escape, he took another few moments to take in his surroundings. It was a nice airport, he noted. Plenty of food stalls for anyone who hadn’t robbed the refreshment cart. (Old habits die hard.)
As one hand ran through his hair roughly to try and calm his nerves, he took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, attempting to ready himself for who he would inevitably see.
He said to meet here, so where–?
Everything seemed to freeze as his eyes locked onto the exact being that had hijacked his thoughts. Literally ten feet away stood Kelvyn. He was right there.
Kelvyn drew a sharp breath as he dialed a number into his phone.
No answer. Straight to voicemail.
Of course. He’d gotten a new number since he had moved, so he didn’t expect to be answered, or even recognized for that matter.
The message tone.
“Hey, D.B. it’s Kelvyn. Listen, I know…” His voice trailed off. He sighed. How should he word this? It was hard enough to think about, but to actually say… “I know we didn’t end off on the best terms. And I’m sorry. I finally realized what I did wrong and Karma has been kickin’ my ass for it. I really am sorry. I thought… At the time, I thought it was the better choice. I was wrong. I didn’t want to ruin things for us, but I did. I’m a traitor and a coward. I’m not saying we have to make things exactly like they were, but at least… At least, can we talk? I… I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
Click. Hung up.
Kelvyn put a hand up to his face to catch the tears that had begun to fall. If there was anything he regretted it was the choices he’d made during the war. He thought they were for the best, but had they really been? Life wasn’t black and white, and he knew that all too well now. He drew a shaky breath as he continued to wipe away his tears.
