#plagued experiments

[polymind-parade]

I'm so nocturnal, why do I only ever have the motivation to do things at night

I have such a problem with staying up till 2-3 am but then thats the only time I feel like existing

[polymind-parade]

I think realizing I'm aplatonic (spectrum) has kinda helped with me feeling like isolating, I'm not super duper overly depressed anymore, it's more of a solemn urge to be alone

It feels better because I know what I'm feeling and I'm not just confused anymore, I just kinda wish I didn't go through this, I like my friends and I would love to have more, it's just hard when I just don't feel platonic attraction or when I'm repulsed by it at some times

I think when I'm in that aplatonic mode, I want a van more, cause most people don't want to live with someone else in a van and I wouldn't be living with my family, it also almost feels more isolating from the world in a way

[polymind-parade]

I wish using magic so much, I miss experimenting with magic, I miss just the feeling of it, the tingle in my hands when I used magic and spells, the tingle in my whole body when I put as much power as I could into my magic, I miss how cool I would look when my tarot cards would surround me and how shocked people would be when they realized how good I was at using magic

I miss my little plague goblin and I miss my friends and partners from that universe and I miss seeing the customers/regulars that would walk into my shop and I miss the gloomy weather and I miss my shop and bed and just everything man, I wish I could use magic like that in this universe

[polymind-parade]

Writing out my plague doctor DS lore and I'm realizing how insane that dream was, which it makes sense because it was a dream and dream logic can be so wack sometimes but it's crazy, I changed it a bit to make it make more sense, but like what do you mean I got randomly transported to the back of a victorian prison car that was also holding a random man that I somehow knew was my father and I just happened to know that he lied so I would be taken away for the crimes he committed?? Unknown crimes because of course, I knew everything else that was happening in this dream except I had to infer from context clues that the crimes he committed were related to magic

Also to add that I was rich for no reason in this dream, all plague doctored up I just immediately bought an old witch's house to turn it into a shop,, where did I get the money for that from... I just got transported to this realm,,, I literally stole the plague doctor disguise I was wearing in that moment,, WHERE DID I GET THE MONEY TO BUY A HOUSE??

[polymind-parade]

Im kinda like the doctor in poppy playtime if I didn't experiment on children for evil

[polymind-parade]

Loving nature in a sitting outside in the forest/a garden enjoying everything you can see and thinking of the ways nature helps people way and also loving nature in a using it to make spells and being completely devoted to mother nature in a bit of a creepy religious way and thinking of all the natural poisons way

[polymind-parade]

What if my knight self and my plague doctor self kissed... And like mother nature is probably there idk

^ Guy who is a little bit insane and a lotta bit weird

[polymind-parade]

I like to imagine myself from a much earlier time using thxy/thxm and hx/hxm pronouns to mess with customers/clients that I don't like and they can't do anything about it because they need me to do something for them that no one else will do or because I'm their best option