#please dont read.

[elijah-terry]

im pretty sure i apologized to you in ninth grade

dont remember manipulating you 

but you realize that also incldues intent right

i enver had intent to fuckin screw with you i fucking cared about you

and as i remembered it you helped me mutilate mine and did all the dsame shit i did in seventh grade and 

thanks for abeing a shitty person an d !! like ! ! ! using my biiiirth name which i would never do to you but you know WHATEVER\

[hadesgates-blog]

all he ever did was tell me ahow stupid ia was and baet me and call me fa tand put me down  bu t i miss him so much i hate that i do this sto myself why cant i jstu let him go

[karkatjpg]

im so tired of existing!!!!!! im not even productive!! why do i keep making excuses and why am i so bitter and jealous and wretched and awkqard lol!!!!!! i should be a better person than this!!!! i want to die while simultaneously striving to be a good person and a good friend and a good student and a good relative and eveyrhingt!!! WHY DO I HATE MYSELF SO MUCHF

[belugabutts]

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK DO YOU WANT JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

[alayhwmikibo]

[davidcameronsasshole]

I can't continue but i can't kill myself i just what am i meant to do nothing is working

[thefinest-finn]

SO, After four very very long years. I am finally saying GOODBYE.

[persephonesstrap]

But I feel sick and the only thing keeping me right now is the voice of someone calming me down.

I'm pretty sure that I went to that psychologist so they could make me block something that happened. All I really recall is visiting this doctor and then leaving. 

I want to know why a three-year-old's memory needed to be blocked. 

There's always been the fact that I'm traumatized, that wasn't a secret, but aside from all the things I remember I want to know what else happened.

What am I not allowed to see.

At the same time, the sheer terror that's got me unable to eat anything and just drink tea tells me I shouldn't try to find out.

But what little I've been reminded of today has me queasy and unsure of what I know.

I'm scared.