#pokemon commentary

[duchesscelestia]

this week's video discussing why new pokemon designs don't look like real pokemon anymore is now live!

[moonvalecrossing]

Moonvale's Pokemon Commentary: #699 Aurorus

The Belle of the Prehistoric age.

Just for Looks:

Remember everything I just said about Amaura? Yeah I feel 100% the same way about its evolution. The colors on both the regular and shiny forms are lovely together. The gems/ice crystals lining the sides of its body perfectly break up the solid colors. The frills are fabulous. This line is my favorite of the fossil pokemon. I love how the line between its stomach and main body form an ice crystal pattern. It’s just such a beautiful pokemon to me.

What's in the Name:

Like it's previous evolution, Aurorus/Amaruruga has its name's origins in the Amargasaurus with the English name also playing on Aurora. Though it seems that Aurorus's name barely takes from the dinosaur's. The ‘rus’ is about it.

The 'Dex Says:

Aurorus is a quiet and kind pokemon, likely because it knew no predators in its native time. That doesn't mean, however, that its a defenseless species. Those diamond shaped crystals on its body? They can expel air that can be as cold as -250 degrees Fahrenheit/-150 degrees Celsius. It can even form a wall of ice for defense instantaneously. If this pokemon doesn’t want you close to it, you’re not gonna be close to it for long. Or alive!

Also, in the Alola dex, it tells us that an Aurorus was found complete and frozen "just as it appeared long ago" in a Glacier which was a big event in the news. The wording on it makes it sound like the restored version we train might not be the exact form the species originally had. Which supports theories I've read that the rock typing all fossils share could be a side effect from being revived from fossils.

It's Rating Time!

5/5. Like I said before, this is my favorite fossil pokemon line. It's elegant, its pretty, its a long neck with sweet hair.

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[shimamoyo]

So I did the thing. Is anyone surprised that it is most Eeveelutions and cats. And they are all adorable.

[sol-of-ashanti]

Pokemon 6: Jirachi Wish Maker Commentary

Holy Shit, they changed that generic ass opening

[moonvalecrossing]

Moonvale's Pokemon Commentary: #27 Sandshrew

They could have called the variant Snowshrew and that upsets me. Time to shake off my hiatus rust and get cracking!

Just for Looks:

Sandshrew is a cute lil rodent-like critter that has a brick like pattern of scales on its body, much like a Pangolin except a pangolin's keratin scales look like... y'know. Scales. And keratin is the same stuff your fingernails or things like certain animals horns and claws are made of. I imagine petting a Sandshrew is a lot like petting a pinecone that feels like fingernails. ;) You're welcome for that mental sensation. Color wise, it's what you would expect for a critter with sand in its name: mainly yellow with a white creamy area where it doesn't have hardened plates. It also has the prettiest shade of blue in its big, rodent like bead eyes. Its shiny form has the same (if not ever so slightly different) Shade of creamy white underbelly and muzzle flesh, but its plates are a lime green, which feels more like a saturated pastel mint green in the 3D models. Surprisingly, I don't hate this. It looks rather nice on this little guy and goes well with his eyes!

Now, for Alolan Variant Sandshrew. Its face is a bit more adorably squished in due to its keratin plating more closely resembling a little igloo themed helmet on its head. It's back armor is also a decent bit thicker and almost looks like he's wearing a seamless turtle shell made of snow bricks. Its unarmored sections of its body are a much more yellow cream color than the usual Sandshrew. Its armor looks like its made of snow, unsurprisingly. When we look at its shiny form, its armored plating appears to stay the same shade of snowy white with hints of blue, but its creamy muzzle is now a much darker blue, like a lighter version of its eye color. I absolutely love this. It looks so pretty. I imagine Alolan Sandshrew use the snow to make armor considering it doesn't change color when shiny.

I would hug every Sandshrew I saw if I could get the mental image of nail-growth feeling armor out of my head.

What's in the Name:

Not too difficult to figure out either version of this critter's name, really. Sandshrew comes from Sand and Shrew. It's Japanese name is Sand. If I have to explain what this thing's name means I'm going to need to take another vacation.

The 'Dex Says:

Sandshrew dislike water, since they're ground types. This is why they choose to live in burrows dug deep in arid desert-like areas. According to Hoenn dex entries, it burrows into the ground at night to sleep. I'd think the deeper you go even in an arid environment the more likely you are to find moisture from underground water deposits. But I'm not a geologist or anything so I'm probably wrong. Anyway, Sandshrew stay in their burrows unless they've come up to hunt and while hunting they will wait at the mouth of their burrow's entrance and quickly lash out and drag its captured prey inside. According to Alolan dex entries, it also digs holes to catch bug type pokemon!

Unsurprisingly, the plate like hide they protect themselves with is very dry. Though during cold nights its said to become coated in a fine dew. I'm not exactly sure how that works, but neat! Its body is built to absorb any amount of water without waste, so I suppose this is how they get the majority of their water based nourishment. When their skin grows too saturated with water it wrinkles. When this happens they basically bask on warm volcanic rock to dry themselves off. I imagine they would also bask on hot desert stones in regions where volcanic activity isn't really a thing. To protect itself from danger it will curl into a tight ball, protecting itself with its tough hide. They can survive even high falls by curling into a ball and simply bouncing from the impact. These things must have very thick rubbery plating or something, and apparently it travels the desert by rolling up in a ball like Sonic the Hedgehog. Good thing I don't have any of the desert themed zone songs memorized or I'd be very annoyed right now.

Now, for Alolan Sandshrew... these critters came about from Sandshrew that fled a volcanic eruption. I guess even if regular sandshrew use volcanic heat to dry themselves out they can't really sand up to lava. These Sandshrew ended up developing hard, icy plated shells. However, this variation is unable to curl into balls any longer due to the stiffness of these shells, which are said to be hard as steel. Predators take advantage of this lack of curling defense and try to attack the soft unprotected sections of its body, resulting in the poor Alolan Sandshrew desperately clinging to the ground and hoping they don't get flipped over.

Also Alolan natives like to slide them across ice as far as they can during festivals like they're those things you use in curling. I.. I really hope that's fun for the sandshrew.

It's Rating Time!

Regular Sandshrew gets a 4/5. They're super cute!

Alolan Sandshrew gets a 5/5. They're even cuter!

But Wait, There's More:

Sandshrew has one of my favorite sprites in any of the games. Look at this happy boy. Look how cute it is. I want to hug it. He's like a round lil happy baby!! If you don't find this even the slightest bit adorable I'm pretty sure it means you have no soul and should probably get that looked at.

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[moonvalecrossing]

Moonvale's Pokemon Commentary: #162 Furret

Making walking a meme since 2019.

Just for Looks:

I absolutely LOVE Furret. This little brown and light brown ferret is so adorable. Its height is listed as 5'11'' (1.8 m). Most like to believe this measurement being head-to-tail instead of an actual height reference. But I really like the mental image of a giant ferret that's 7 inches taller than me. I would hug it always. This is another pokemon that would just make for a really great pillow-plush.

I really adore Furret's shiny as well. Instead of browns, it's shades of pink! Little cotton candy cat snake. Yee!

What's in the Name:

Furret is really easy. It's just Ferret, but starts with Fur. :P

Ootachi has a few things that could be part of it. Ō (big) and itachi (weasel), as well as the o (tail) and tatsu (stand) from the same origins as Sentret's Japanese name. However looking at this, it's likely Big-Tail Weasel and tatsu isn't part of it as Furret doesn't stand on its tail like Sentret does!

The 'Dex Says:

Despite their short limbs, Furret are very quick and nimble pokemon. They are able to corner foes easily with their speed and are very quick at hunting Rattata. It's difficult to tell where Furret's tail actually begins due to how long and slim its body is. When they're under attack, they're able to easily slip and squirm through narrow spaces in order to evade the threat and escape to safety.

This ability to maneuver through tight complicated spaces helps it with making its home. The tunnels leading to its burrow are winding and tight to the point that other pokemon cannot get through or even into it. The deeper the tunnels are, the more maze-like they become. In the nest of the burrow a mother Furret will curl around her children to help them sleep. It's no wonder Sentret can be so nervous without someone watching over them for protection. They must not be able to make the safe tunnels their parents do until they evolve and group together once they've left the nest for a sense of security. Makes me think that Senret groups are composed of Sentret that grew big enough that the parent Furret pushed them out of the nest to make room for the next litter.

It's Rating Time!

X/5. Furret is perfect. I want one to keep as a pet. Giant cat snakes everywhere!!!

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[moonvalecrossing]

Moonvale's Pokemon Commentary: #53 Persian

There is no hate for Persian allowed in this house. Do you understand?

Just for Looks:

Persian is just a big ol' meowth that lost its darker brown coloration and gained a sleeker more cat-like body. Its shiny coin evolved into a beautiful red gem. Despite its name, it's not a long haired cat. It’s more like you took a shorthaired housecat and made it somewhat bigger than the size of a cougar. It shares Meowth's normal body color so I can't really complain about much. Though I wish it had something more on it as it's kind of plain as one solid color. It's shiny however is different from Meowth. There's nearly no difference between regular and shiny Persian. It's just an ever so slightly lightly shade of yellow cream (or whitish cream due to 3D model wash out).

Now, onto Alolan Persian. Its colors are the same as Alolan Meowth, sans the tail and paws and it has a lovely blue gemstone in place of the old coin. And then there's the thing everyone hates on this poor baby about. Look at its face. I love that face. Alolan Persian doesn’t have a weird huge skull. Alolan Persian's a longer haired smoosh face kitty. Considering the species was bred by royalty for specific features, it's likely a reference to how those cats are bred to have 'cute' flat faces despite the health issues they can cause. The shiny, like its previous form's, is freaking beautiful. The dark blue grey is very, very lovely. And that purplishness of shiny alolan meowth’s tail and back paws has become more purple and makes this cute baby look like it's got eyeshadow.

You are not allowed to hate on Persian here. This is a safe space for Persian.

What's in the Name:

Persian cats. That's it. Its name is the same in English and Japanese. Bulbapedia adds that maybe purr is part of it since cats do that. But then it would be called Purrsian or something instead.

The 'Dex Says:

Standard Persian are loved for their regal air, beautiful fur, and graceful movements. However, many find them hard to raise due to their fickle nature, somewhat wild temperament, and the fact they will apparently lash out and scratch for seemingly no reason. (Methinks one of Oak's child labor minions isn't a cat person either...) It's lithe muscles and elegant body structure allows for soundless movement and it can strike in an instant. Its whiskers allow it to sense throughout its surroundings and becomes docile if these six whiskers are grabbed. Cheesus, kid. I'm gonna let it eat you at this rate. If it raises its tail straight up, this is a sign it is about to pounce. When real cats have their tail up it usually means they’re happy to see you... at least my three cats anyway. Persian just loves you and wants to tackle hug you! It apparently has a high opinion of itself, but not as much as Alolan Persians do. I think the cat hating Alolan kid is back.

The gem on its forehead, while a different color from the Alolan-bred Persian, is made of a similar material. This likely implies that Persian gems are in fact rubies and sapphires as these gemstones are the same in make up but differ only in color. Red sapphires are rubies. Blue rubies are sapphires. Fans of Persian apparently have long discussions about the size of Persian gemstones. These stones make them popular with the rich and, surprise surprise, hunters target it looking to poach the gem in its head. No wonder they're said to attack anyone who looks them in the eye in Alolan UM dex entries. They're probably scared you're gonna kill it and yank the rock out of its head.

Alolan Persian were bred to have the roundest, fluffiest faces. The rounder and plumper, the more beautiful they're seen as. See? I told you. Moosh face cat references. It is said to have one of the classiest coats. In fact, Alolan Persian tend to have coats that are softer than most high class velvets. Despite it's beauty, this pokemon is really rough thanks to its Dark Type nature. It prefers to fight with sucker punches and blindsiding its opponents and will take pleasure in torturing weakened prey rather than finishing it off outright.

Someone really hates cats over in Alola, you guys. No wonder Nanu saves so many and keeps em in his house.

It's Rating Time!

4/5 for the Standard Persian. It's not really got a whole lot going for it but its still a really nice cat.

X/5 for Alolan Bred Persian. I love it and its round face and its dark type to bits.

But Wait, There's More:

I want Nanu and Giovanni to have a Persian vs Persian battle. Let my Officer Husband and Mafia Husband do battle in glorious cat combat. That's it. I don't have anything else to add here. Enjoy this twist that two men of opposite moral standing can both love these cats, and the cop is the one who owns the dark type.

Want to read more of my reviews? Click here!

[moonvalecrossing]

Moonvale's Pokemon Commentary: #332 Cacturne

I mean, scarecrows have pumpkin heads sometimes, right?

Just for Looks:

I love this pokemon's design. What better for a jack-o'-lantern cactus to evolve into a big ol' scarecrow. I love how the material that its tough spikes are made of has formed a neat little cap on its head in place of Cacnea’s flower. I imagine that's a pretty tough bit of protection.

It basically looks like a big cute plush bodied cactus doll. Its thorns also create a bit of a stitched look as well. If someone knows how a scarecrow is depicted in Halloween decor, I'm sure they could recognize the design inspiration right away.

Also I think this is one of the first pokemon I've reviewed chronologically that has a really noticeable gender difference. Steelix has one, but I totally forgot to mention it because it has like.. one less tooth on its face? Anyway, female Cacturne have two small and one big diamond marking going down on their torso while males have four smaller ones in a line down its torso.

Now, for the shiny. I love it just as much as I love Cacnea's. I love me some orange plant pokemon you guys. The same beautiful shades of orange as Cacnea...

What's in the Name:

Cacturne's name obviously comes from Cactus + Nocturne. Its Japanese name is simply Noctus which is basically a different spelling of the Latin word Noctis meaning "of night". Very fitting for a suddenly dark type cactus. And hoo boy, are we just getting started on the appropriateness of the dark/night time meaning of its name...

The 'Dex Says:

Cacturne stand motionlessly during the day to protect themselves from losing moisture in the harsh desert heat. Once night falls and the temperature drops, it will begin to hunt. Surprise: it's nocturnal! What does it hunt, you ask? Oh boy. It will follow trainers wandering the desert at night- in 'ragtag groups' mind you- and then they will move in when that trainer is too exhausted to move. That's right. If you wanna travel through a desert these bad boys haunt in the pokemon world you better be prepared to start traveling before sunset has completed and only stop to rest once the sun is up and the desert heat begins to kick up. Otherwise you're gonna get ate by some cactus scarecrows. A gang of cactus scarecrows. Sleep tight, children!

Also, according to the Emerald pokedex, spending thousands of years in the harshness of the desert, the blood (yes, blood. THE CACTUS BLEEDS) of these pokemon has become basically the same as sand. Now, I don't know if this means that modern Cacturne evolved like this over time or if Cacturne living that long turn into sand-blooded nightmare cactus gangs. Have I mentioned I love this pokemon? Because I'm starting to love it more now.

It's Rating Time!

X/5. I was gonna give it 5/5, but that was before I found out these guys are terrifying night-desert stalkers that eat people. Dark types are a damn treasure, I tell you. Harley from the Gen 3 episodes of the anime has good taste.

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