#poltergeist anon

[ask-coffeebrewsandhexs]

Hi, uh, I asked about the poltergeist. It’s still here and it won’t go away. My idiot brother used a Ouija Board because he’s a dumb jack ass so... help? Please?

Craig: For fucks sake. Tweek literally told you not to.

Who is your brother? Do I know him? He sounds like a moron.

[ask-coffeebrewsandhexs]

Okay listen. I’ve got a poltergeist problem and I want to get rid of it. Any advice?

Tweek: First of all Don’t use Ouija boards.

I recommend you cleanse the area with sage and then have a priest come and bless/anoint it.

[calamitysshatteredson]

The pen bounces in a distinctly cheerful way and penny seems to drift back to doodling on the paper

Giving it a moment's thought, Sephiroth retrieves some paper for himself to make a list. Pencils, notebooks, crayons... puzzles? Do-- Do regular children enjoy puzzles? He supposes it would be a bit suspicious to attempt to get advice on the matter, but it's something to look for to keep the spirit occupied.

"I'm fairly certain there are no regulations about ghosts staying here." He assures conversationally as he writes, letting himself imagine for just a moment that would be untrue the moment anyone realized that technically there was more than one resident in his quarters. Maybe a little too amusing. "As long as you're not haunting the neighbors, all should be fine."

[calamitysshatteredson]

There's a pause, then penny gives a rather uncertain waggle of the pen. Maybe she doesn't know? Or maybe she doesn't know how to say what it might be

Not helpful, exactly, but he supposes that's the best they'll get for a while. it's already been... educational. "Well, that's alright. We've figure it out this far." And hopefully there's more, since he does rather enjoy solving mysteries.

This is a bit different than calling plot details in a detective novel, however. "I suppose you're destined to stick around a while, then?" He'd need a few more things. More paper, for one, pencils, crayons. Luckily he won't have the physical presence of a picky eater on his hands, which is-- Alright, the extent of what he knows about children.

[calamitysshatteredson]

Instead the pen is pulled back and multiple happy faces are drawn on the paper. And the table bit that doesn't seem purposeful as they're quickly being attempted to be rubbed off.

Sephiroth crosses his arms and snorts softly, looking on amused as if he isn't just watching a little bit of nothing and mysteriously floating objects. Well, the ink will wipe off, surely.

When the thrill of victory with the name subsides, however, something a little more somber takes hold. He's heard any number of completely ridiculous ghost stories from various sources, most of them clearly intended to scare. Not all, however, and he gives something he'd previously cast aside as clearly not real some thought.

"Penny." He repeats the name, tone thoughtful. "Is there-- Is there something you need? Something I should do for you?" Given that this spirit may not know how to write, he's not sure if there's an answer to give.

[calamitysshatteredson]

The pen is shoved even more firmly into his face. Maybe it's a hint?

"I'm not--" His half-annoyed protest is interrupted when his own analytical mind kicks into play. He's certain he has to be wrong, really, because it's just too easy, but at the same time...

"Penny?" Sephiroth tries quietly, eyes focused on the empty space behind the pen as if he might see someone there. "Is that your name?" He's only ever so slightly concerned about having the pen thrown at him if he's wrong...

[calamitysshatteredson]

All of the names are scribbled out with some force before the pen is pushed very pointedly in his face- maybe they're trying to communicate, albeit rudely, a preference?

Blinking and leaning back a bit, he's momentarily puzzled by exactly what that was. "Well you can't have my name..."

Focusing back on the paper with all the names scribbled out, Sephiroth begins to think out loud, "You want me to choose for you..?" He really, really isn't any good at that sort of thing, but he reached for a name he enjoys the sound of, at least. "Erin, maybe..?"

[calamitysshatteredson]

The response from the poltergeist is for the pen to bounce in the air, like it's being waved about.

Sephiroth makes a thoughtful sound before turning, moving to lean more comfortably against the kitchen counter as he considers. "It's a shame I've always been terrible at naming things." Sadly that's not quite a joke, but it also doesn't mean that he's unwilling to try.

"Hm, ought I be thinking of something considered sex- and gender-neutral? Adrian, perhaps? Or something a bit more controversial like Michael?" He's smiling ever so lightly with a touch of amusement. Then again--

"Wait, hold on." The poltergeist had had trouble writing, after all. Retrieving another piece of paper, he wrote down the names as he spoke them, "Adrian, Alex, Michael, and Chris, to start. Cross out what you don't like?" It was a little convoluted and likely to be a long process, but he supposed there was time enough.