Discover Top Posts Tagged with #poor lexi

Maude Apatow as Lexi Howard in Euphoria Season 3 Episode 5

#poor lexi #lexi howard #euphoria #maude apatow #euphoria season 3 #lexi euphoria

The duality of my dash🤡

the fact that lexi was so excited to show off her bob ross costume and her friends just laughed in her face and her own mom implied she doesn’t look good. FEZ WOULD’VE LOVED IT and i sincerely believe she needed him in season 1

#fexi thoughts #fexi #fexi hive #hi i’m new #poor lexi #she deserved better #fez is her biggest supporter

Imma need you to please expand on this little thought because I’m dying to see it!! 🤣

OKAY SO

poor Az has got himself in a bit of a pickle and fallen through space and time to our universe

let’s say the poor lad comes to in a residential area and is looking around like shocked pikachu. He begins to walk around in a daze, his hand on the hilt of Truth-Teller. He’s searching for some sign of life, but there’s nobody. All of the houses are in darkness and everything is eerily still and quiet and freezing cold.

AND THEN — and then — he realises the door to one of the houses is open just a crack. And…what’s that? A strange glow emanating from inside. Az draws Truth-Teller 🗡️ and inches towards the door, pushing it open with his fingertips. There’s still no noise, no sign of life, but the glow is coming from a strange little orb atop of a table.

Az opens his mouth to call out, but — he’s cut off! “ONE NEW NOTIFICATION FROM AMAZON SHOPPING”. It’s coming from the glowing orb. Az jumps out of his skin and juts Truth-Teller at the offending the object.

“Who is that?” He demands. “Show yourself.”

“ONE NEW NOTIFICATION FROM AMAZON SHOPPING,” the orb repeats. “A SHIPMENT CONTAINING: GLASS ANAL BEADS, IS DUE TO BE DELIVERED TODAY.”

Az marches up to the orb, the tip of Truth-Teller poking its front. “Who’s there? Reveal yourself at once—”

“A NEW RECOMMENDATION BASED ON YOUR READING HISTORY HAS ARRIVED. WOULD YOU LIKE TO LEARN MORE?”

“No—”

“AMAZON RECOMMENDS: “A COURT OF SILVER FLAMES”. I CAN ADD IT TO YOUR WISHLIST. WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO DO THA—”

Poor Lexi’s voice trails off as Az slams the tip of Truth-Teller right through the orb, ending her torturous incantations. He breathes a sigh of relief, tries to gather his thoughts and wonders how the fuck he’s going to get out of here. He sheaths Truth-Teller once more, muttering an irked “seriously?” at the fact that the evil ball is still glowing in front of him despite him stealing its voice. And then—

“SIRI NOT AVAILABLE.”

#there’s no way I just fucking did this #this is why I will never be a published author #for fucks sake lmao #poor az #poor lexi #fuck you siri