This week, all I seem to have been doing is trying to keep myself busy. The other afternoon I went to visit both my nans. One is 93 and as much as she’s fiercely independant, she’s losing the ability to do some thing. She was telling me how she went for an eye appointment hoping they could help with her increasing difficulty with her vision, only for them to tell her it was her age and there wasn’t anything they could do. She also told me how she misses food shopping - looking around the shops choosing different things to try. Currently my Dad does her shopping and just gets the same old things. I offered to take her to the supermarket and that she could use one of the wheelchairs there but she told me if she was going to go shopping again, it would be when she could walk properly again and without even the use of a stick. So, taking all this into account, I spoke to my Dad and suggested we show her how to shop online because that way, at least if she can’t get to the shop, we could try and bring it to her. It puts things into perspective really seeing all she really wants is to be able to see and to go shopping.
My other nan is 80 and her health is really poor. She pretty much lives in her living room in either her chair or the bed that was brought in to make it more comfortable. She can’t really move around, only really a small shuffle to use the commode or if she can, the toilet. It’s so sad seeing her like that as she’s been like a mum to me over the years. She’s so used to the house being full of her grand kids and whatnot, that now, it’s pretty much just her and my grandad. Most of her grandchildren have grown up and got their own kids and even to me it just feels like everyone has abandoned her. I do what I can, as does my sister and my mum. My nan has 6 kids (one sadly died a couple of years ago) and only really 2 of them make any amount of effort to visit. She’s been in and out of hospital a few times these past 18 months and on a few of those occasions, we really weren’t sure if she’d make it out again. The problem with my nan though is that she likes a drink of whisky now and again. However it seems to have gotten pretty bad now in that she’ll ask my mum to buy her a litre bottle of whisky one day, then get my sister to buy her another a few days later, and then ask me if i’m about another few days later. All the while making out to each of us she hasn’t had any for ages. We are all pretty worried as with the amount of medication she’s on, it can be really dangerous even just having a little tipple now and again. I had to say to her the other day that I was no longer willing to buy her any more whisky and could she please not ask me to. I get it though, her life is restricted to her living room with only my grandad and carers to help her out (aside the odd visit from family). My grandad isn’t in great health either so there’s a limit to what he can do. It’s not surprising she wants to escape life by drinking at this point, but I really can play a part in it especially as it could risk her health. I really want to help her out in some way, but aside visiting her (I live 20 miles away from all my family) and calling her, I don’t know what else to do.