“I started [social media] in 2017 to 2018. My wife actually started earlier, and I was supporting her from the background, behind the scenes.”
That all changed when her brother and mother, who didn’t have social media, were informed by a family friend that Shubhalaxmi Patil’s Instagram account had a rainbow emoji, a symbol of LGBTQ2S+ pride, next to her name.
“It was so silly. I didn’t think anyone from my family or my brother’s friend would understand that. But they told my brother, my brother explained it to my mom, and my mom told me to remove that emoji,” she said.
“And I was like, ‘I’m already shrinking myself so much that I’m not in the videos. I’m not publicly out. But you are asking me to remove that emoji, as well?’ I don’t know. It’s like the rebel in me, or I was just done with shrinking myself to make everyone around me feel comfortable. I just started making videos.”
Now living in Toronto, Patil met her wife in India while attending different colleges. They have been together for 13 years, but when they lived in India they had to keep their relationship more private for their own safety.
Imposed during British Colonial rule, a law criminalizing same-sex relationships was struck down in 2018. Another law acknowledging a third gender was passed even earlier in 2014. But much like Canada, stigma, harassment and violence towards queer and trans people remains ongoing in India.
"This is Desi Pride", by Shubhalaxmi Patil for The Tyee











