Shantae: Half-Genie Housewife - Chapter 1
Shantae stood just outside the doors to the lair's innermost sanctum, hyping herself up. The puzzles have been solved, the enemies defeated and the traps avoided, all while she was heavily pregnant with twins. She smiled and rubbed her stomach. “This is it, you guys. Nearly over.” She pushed open the door and charged in, taking a battle stance. “Baron!”
“Ah, the little half-genie Shantae,” the baron chuckles, his back to her as he stood hunched over a cauldron. His figure was obscured by a dark cloak. “What an unexpected surprise, and by unexpected I of course mean completely expected.”
“So? I’m ready to take you on!” She retorts, raising her fists. “Get ready to have your butt kicked!”
“On the contrary, my dear,” he grinned and chuckled, beginning to turn around. “It is you who will have your--!” Now fully turned around, he stopped himself mid sentence, his menacing look on his plain, shaven face dropped to one of confusion and even surprise.
Shanate grinned and laughed. “What? Surprised I’m still in one piece from your traps? Gotta admit, they were pretty good for a new guy like you.”
The baron took a sharp inhale, and fiddled with his fingers. “Well, um, I guess that is one thing as well,” he nodded, “but, um, I was not aware of...that.” He gestured to her stomach area.
The half-genie gave a confused look. “What? You mean my tummy?” She poked it with a finger. “What? Think I can’t kick butt when expecting?”
“I mean, it is very clear you can, just isn’t something you really expect. Man. Woof.” He turned his back to her again. “Why didn’t they tell me she’s pregnant?! Would have been good to know! Can, can I even do this now?”
“Huh?” Shanate tilted her head, dropping her fists to now rest on her hips. “Can you what? Fight me? I don’t see why not.”
He turned back to her, throwing his hood down to reveal long unkempt brown locks. He clapped his hands together in front of him. “Listen. Allow me to level with you. As you can tell, I am a new baron. Heck, I don’t even have a title yet. I’m just ‘baron’, not even a capital ‘B’.” He chuckled awkwardly. “As such, this is really my make or break moment to see if I can become a true baron. I have some qualms with it being I have to beat up a pregnant girl.”
“Who says you’re gonna win?” She smirks. “Listen, I went through your dungeon, solved your puzzles, and even learned a new transformation that I’m sure will help me take down whatever tricks you have up your sleeves. Let’s fight already!” She pouts a little.
“How far along are you anyways?” He asks absentmindedly.
Shantae rolls her eyes. “Eight months with twins.” She places a hand on her bump and rubs a small area.
“Ok. Yep. That’s pretty far along, especially for twins,” the baron nodded. “I could easily put you in labor during our fight, and I don’t want that on me.”
“Aw, come on!” She shouts, clearly frustrated. “Please? I swear I won’t pop! My tummy hasn’t even dropped yet, so I’m not even close to labor.”
“I’m pretty sure you can’t control when the baby comes, unless it's some genie power,” he adds, unimpressed. “Look, why are you even fighting when you’re so pregnant?”
“Because I’ve gotta protect people from bad guys like you! It’s my job!”
“And there is no one else who can handle this? Just you?”
“Well, my friends could,” Shantae contemplates, but quickly shakes it off, “but this really is my thing, so I want to keep doing it my way.” She shrugs and pats her bump.
“You could at least set up a buddy system or something. What happens if you do something that hurts your babies or something? What then?”
“Well…” She was quiet for a while, not really sure what to say. “I just try not to,” she finally responded, before glaring at him in an angry yet kind of cute way. “Why do you even care about this anyways? You’re the bad guy!” “Valid point, but I don’t want to harm the unborn child! They’re the purest of innocents as there are, and I will not be a monster!”
“Children,” she corrects. “But you do other bad things, right?”
“Theft, larceny, enslavement, pirating, malicious potion brewing, world domination,” he listed off, “but nothing like killing. No sir. Non-lethal takeovers are the plans of this baron-to-be!”
“Ugh! You’re the lamest baron ever!” She huffs, rolling her eyes. “You really suck!”
“Oh, I’m sorry, what do you want me to do then, huh? Just break the Barons’ Code? That’s a great idea to get kicked out!” He retorted mockingly. He crosses his arms. “Inconsiderate welp. You could learn some decency. In fact...yeah,” he smiled and nodded his head slowly. “Yeah. I think I know an apt punishment for you now. Get ready, half-genie!”
“Oh, so now you wanna fight. Finally!” She grinned, resuming her fighting posture.
“With magic!” He declares, turning back to his cauldron.
“Oh yeah, with what?” She mocks. “I have loads of transformations. Flood the room? I’ll swim as a mermaid. Fire floor? I’ll fly above it! Spikes? I’ll jump from spike to spike as a monkey! Show me what ya got!”
“Quiet the impressive repertoire,” he smirks at his cauldron. “You like having such varied transformations on hand, is that correct, my dear?”
She responds cautiously after a moment. “Yeah…?”
“Well, then.” He turns back to her, a pink vial now in hand. “Perhaps you would care for a new one?”
Her eyes go right for the vial. “Yeah, sure. Probably some kind of poison, isn’t it? What makes you think I can trust you with that?”
“You can’t really, can you?” He asks rhetorically, shaking the vial. “Shame. Looks like you’ll have to take a chance.” He suddenly dashes forward with a great speed, placing a hand firmly on her belly.
“Hey!” She shouts, her facing turning a bright red and her voice growing angry. “W-Watch it, pal!” She tries to back up, but it feels to her as if his hand was now glued to her.
“Say ‘ah’,” he teased as he tried to force the bottle to her lips.
She curls in her lips, keeping her mouth sealed. “Mhmh!” She shakes her head. The baron, not to be deterred, begins to squeeze her belly; soft at first, but progressively tighter and tighter. Shantae begins to moan, holding them back as long as she can until she is forced to open her mouth. “What happened to--?”
Before she could so much as start, the baron quickly poured the contents of the vial straight down her throat, forcing her to swallow it down. The liquid was very thin, and emptied quickly down her gullet. “You JERK!” She shouted, trying to swipe away at him with her hair.
“Thought you’d like a little gift,” he joked, dodging by quickly rushing back as fast as he had come.
“What happened to not hurting a pregnant lady?” She asked in a hoarse voice while rubbing her throat.
“Did I hurt you, though?” He asked back, sounding honest.
“You sq-squeezed my tummy! An-And forced me to drink that weird gunk!” Her voice was returning to normal, but sounded flustered now.
“But does it hurt?” He asked again, just as honest.
“It...well, n-no,” she responded quietly. “B-But still!” She pouted.
“See? No harm, so no foul.” He shrugs nonchalantly.
“Big jerk,” she huffs, crossing her arms atop her belly. “What did that stuff even do to me?”
“Not feeling it yet? (Not enough bat wool),” he asked. “Well then you should be feeling it soon enough.”
“What? What is it?!”
“You’ll see,” he grins
She cowers slightly, putting her hands on her belly nervously. Suddenly, a weak headache strikes her, and she feels the whole weight of her body on her. She takes a few hazy steps as the headache builds in intensity, trying to lean against a wall that was not there.
“Feeling woozy?”
“N-No!” She retorts, gasping as the headache makes a large surge.
“Seems like it to me,” he chuckles.
“Shut up,” she scoffs and blows a raspberry before shortly falling to the floor. Oooh, my head...wait...what is this…?
“Something on your mind?” He asks tauntingly.
“Nnggh-nothing!” She snaps, shutting her eyes and grasping her pounding head. What are these thoughts? They’re so weird…
“Trying to fight it? I’d suggest not. It is a very strong potion,” he voices.
“Wh-What did you do?” She struggles to say, the thoughts in her mind getting more intrusive and over powering.
“Your thoughts. Tell me them, speak them aloud and you will have your answer.” He grins deviously.
“Staying at home, c-cooking...cleaning?” She grits her teeth as she speaks, and the realization hits her. “Y-You’re making me a housewife…?”
“Yes! Exactly!” He pumped a fist. “Now you got it! Right on the money!”
“Why?!” She yelled, making as strong as an effort she still could to hold back the thoughts in her head.
“It’s simple, really, when you think about it. By making you a dutiful little housewife, you won’t get in my way to stop my plans as you’ll be much too busy around the house. Much too busy!” He explained. “In fact, you’ll never trouble the Barons again. This will certainly earn me my baron title!”
“You jerk!” Shantae retorted in an appalled tone.
“Fight it all you want,” the baron sounded amused, “but once the brew eventually sets in, you will simply have to give in.”
The half-genie began breathing deeply as the thoughts began to overtake her. “You big, dumb jerk! You are the absolute worst, you big, fat, stupif je--!”
And then she suddenly stopped, mid sentence. A confused, almost lost look came across her face.
And there it is, the baron thought. “My, how rude. You’re hurting my feelings.
“Oh? I-I’m ever so sorry,” Shantae responded, her tone suddenly sweet. “I don’t know what came over me.”
Score. “Oh, think nothing of it,” he chuckled with a hand wave. “You were simply not in the right mind.”
She giggles lightly. “Of course. Um, would you mind maybe showing me home?” She blushed slightly, trying to get to her feet.
“Of course,” he nods, quickly coming to her side to help her up. “Where is it you live, my dear?”
“I live in--.” A chill shook her head, and her eye twitched. “What? I’ll never tell you, ya creep!” She yelled and pointed accusingly, before a confused look came over her face and she withdrew her arm. “S-Sorry about that...that was strange.”
“You’re fine. Must simply be the hormones,” he tells her. Fight all you want, little half-genie, he laughs to himself.
“Probably. They do do strange things,” she giggles, stroking her belly slowly.
“Fret not, I understand. So, where do you live? I assume somewhere in Scuttle Town, correct?”
“Yes, the lighthouse on the outskirts,” she nodded with a smile.
“I can manage that. I’ll use some magic to take you back,” I offer.
“Be my--.” Her head jerked slightly, before she took a step back and tried to run away.
“Shantae? Where are you going?” He asked calmly but with a subtle confidence.
“Away from you, you je--!” She suddenly stops with a confused look, nearly stumbling over. “W-What was that?”
“Careful.” The baron hurries to her side to catch her from falling. “Not the best idea to run while pregnant. Center of gravity is all off.”
“Of course, I shouldn’t be doing such silly things,” she giggles. “Thank you, again.”
“No problem,” he smiles comfortingly. “Speaking of silly things, your get up…”
“Hm?” She looks down at herself. As was the usual, she wore a very small red crop top, with pants in a matching shade that were see-through slightly. She also wore gold braces around her arms and her hair was held back in a tight ponytail. “You’re right, this is pretty silly,” she laughs. “I mean, just look at all this belly I’m showing off. “
“Just a suggestion,” the baron started as he began to lead her out of his lair, “but perhaps change into something more reasonable when you get home?”
“A very good suggestion,” she agreed, following him. “I had the idea myself. I certainly must have something more comfortable.”
“Yes,” he nodded, cheering in victory on the inside. “So, any other plans for today?”
“Hmmm.” She trails behind him a small distance as they walk. “I think I should clean up my house today, certainly has been a while...maybe take a crack at some baking...and...kicking your butt!”
He quickly glanced behind himself to catch her charging forward, shouting and making motions to tackle him. He quickly stepped aside, but made it seem like he got hurt in some way.
Shantae rolls forward, ending up on her butt. The determined look on her face quickly melts to one of alarm and embarrassment. “Oh my! I’m so sorry, I-I don’t know what came over me!”
“You’re fine. I am quite alright,” he assures her, quickly coming to help her up. “Though, let’s hope that’s the last outburst…” A bold attempt, but that was your last try. The potion should have fully set in by now.
“Yes, let’s,” she nodded in agreement. “Sorry, again. I’ve been such a mess, and I have no idea why.”
“You’re fine, really. I’ve handled worse,” he joked, making a small laugh. “So, back on topic, is that all you have planned? What about going out?”
Shantae looked at him with a bemused expression. “Why would I go out? Maybe for shopping, but what else?”
“Just curious,” the baron responded, congratulating himself mentally. “Is there any reason why?”
“I belong at home,” she explains. “That’s where I should be, preparing for my babies.” She hugs her belly, smiling down at it.
“Good,” the baron grins. The two eventually arrive outside his lair, which exits to the lush jungles of Sequin Land. “Seems quite a walk,” he commented, trying to gaze through the rather dense trees. “How did you get here to begin with, if you can recall?”
“I ran,” she responded, and seemed to surprise herself. “What a silly thing to do!” She laughs, patting her stomach.
“And dangerous. I must offer you a safer means back home. I have a spell that can make the travel much quicker.”
“That would be wonderful, thank you,” she nodded.
“Of course,” he said. “Hopefully, we may have another visit with each other at a later time.”
“That would be very nice.”
“Farewell, Shantae,” he waved, and in an instant he summoned a whirlwind, producing a squeak from the half-genie before she disappeared with it. When she finally did, the baron let out a hearty, loud laugh. “It worked! Now she sees herself as nothing more than a lowly housewife! I am free to pursue my plans! The barons may wreck havoc as they please!” A wide grin grows across his face. “Oh! I must tell them! I will certainly earn my title now!” With a spring in his step, the baron returned to the bowels of his lair.