Hey girly ! I wanted to request for a angsty fic with zion in which the main character (y/n lol) has to break up with zion after being together for idk a year lol idek Because of her anxiety and trust issues or sum idk. Thank u bb and ur so fuckin amazing 🥺💖 wuvv uuu. ( If that didn't make sense i- hwjsjs 🕳️🏃🏻♀️)
Cycles Z.Kuwonu
𝗥𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗱: 𝒚𝒆𝒔.
⁞ ❏. Synopsis: y/n and zion have been together for a year, but during this trademark, anxiety starts to rise and to prevent herself from getting hurt so leaves.
⁞ ❏. Genre: Angst
⁞ ❏. Pairing: Female Reader X Zion Kuwonu
⁞ ❏. Warnings: Anxiety, self-isolation, and profanity.
⁞ ❏.A/N: this took me a little while to type I'm sorry for it being so late, and I was listening to Halsey so this may get really angsty eek. But I love you dear you’re welcome, I haven’t written full-on angst in months 🥺🧡 listen to sorry by Halsey this what I was crying too.
Y/n loved zion with her heart, but anxiety and relationships never made her brain healthy. She knew zion loved her but the constant possibilities that everything could go wrong in a year. Not that she didn’t trust Zion, it just seem that history kept repeating itself. Cheating. Toxic relationships. Back the cheating the vicious cycle painting in her chest. She couldn’t phantom it again. Grabbing her phone the picture that lit up on her face, showed his smile. A photo she could hear the sounds from vividly. It was their third date; picking sunflowers and watching the stars. At this moment a ladybug has landed on him, but Zion was the giddiest person.
“I’m sorry” she whispered to her phone; Zion has been on tour and she’s been ghosting him. Not purposely but fear was grabbing her by the throat, pressuring her to just leave, the echos of truth as she presumed swelled her brain. ‘Leave before you get hurt, don’t let pain arrive to you first’ is what she kept saying to herself. Even though she ghosted him, her page was full of news about him. Fan pages, edits, clips, interviews, Twitter mentions. The more his name popped up the more guilt sprung her heart.
On the other line, Zion was freaking out. He couldn’t do anything, he was miles away. No calls, no texts. Just dead space silence from the woman he loved the most. Overthinking and drinking causing him to crash in his bed every night after a show. The boy's constant worrying is his health up to par, pleading for him to take a break. But Zion knew if he allowed himself to take a break, he’ll feel the pain and begin to cry filling his hollow chest with water. He loved y/n. He loved her with his whole being. He always wondered did he do enough for her? Did he love her heard enough? Was he good enough? All the questions he wanted to ask couldn’t be answered.
Y/n paced back in forth in her bedroom, picking at her split nails, contouring how she wanted the conversation to go. Zion is supposed to be in town tomorrow, and she knew his heart, he will be coming to see her. To ask her questions. That would end in some tears, for them both. She didn’t want him to come over, she texted him late at night waiting for his reply.
˗ˏˋTo: King🤍 'ˎ˗
𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁. 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘄𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲?
When she looked back at her phone the script under the message made her heart sink “read 2:30 am”, maybe he fell asleep with his phone in hand she thought to herself. Twenty minutes later as she was dozing off her phone vibrated, jerking her up.
˗ˏˋFrom: King🤍 'ˎ˗
Can you tell me through text?
I don’t think I can hear your voice right now...
Her head lolls back; she’s hurting him. She’s been hurting him for the past weeks. Almost a whole month, and to make matters worse. Today is their one year anniversary. Fuck could she be anymore of a problem.
˗ˏˋTo: King🤍 'ˎ˗
So.. don’t think it’s your fault, but let’s break up okay? I’m not really in the headspace to be dating precisely now and I don’t wanna mistreat you anymore. I have so many thoughts and qualms going through my mentality, and I don’t want you believing you’re a vicious boyfriend, because you’re far from that. You’re an unprecedented fucking human Zion and I don’t wanna damage you the way I’m severely damaged. I know I’m not the most open book but fuck I really do love you and I wish things were different. Don’t beat yourself up over this okay? Promise me?
˗ˏˋFrom: King🤍 'ˎ˗
I don’t think it’s my negligence, at least I wish I could say that. There’s no way I could ever discern how you feel, or know how to help that emotion or insecurity, I get that we all endeavor with something. And I get it you don’t wanna hurt me. But I’m already maiming for you, I just want you to laugh as you used to. And yeah I’ll divulge it for a while, I thought it was me I thought you fell outta love with more, or maybe I was putting you through this misery again. I thought if I gave you your expanse, maybe then you’ll feel proficient. But I see now you just need warmth from a distance until you become better. Or maybe auspicious utterances that will show you matter or actions that attack those antagonized stanzas
˗ˏˋFrom: King🤍 'ˎ˗
I idolize you for assigning yourself foremost. I’m fucking astounded by your courage in doing so, I wish you didn’t go through this trauma. But people a fucking disastrous, I wish you the best convalescence y/n, you goddamn deserve it. Thank you for treasuring all my ways, thank you for just being alive, you’re a tremendous fucking human too. Just know no matter what anyone says I love every single part of you. The barrage, the rainbow and even the blizzards. Scarred or not your essence towards good people has never transformed.
˗ˏˋFrom: King🤍 'ˎ˗
Remember that your individuality is what attracted me to you. Fuck that perfect image, because what’s perfect is easy. What’s impure is customary, and falling in love with you felt and is natural that will never deviate. I promised you I would insulate you so I’m vacating you with that in mind. Don’t try to be meticulous, because perfection isn’t something to achieve, it’s the generosity you should procure. Take care of yourself love you forever.
She read Zion’s paragraph; the surge of happiness and the gust being replenished back into her lungs, she felt optimistic but culpable in that juncture she wanted to prove her demons wrong. But she couldn’t phantom where to start. Drying her tears she looked into the mirror, “you won't defeat me, I'm seizing my life back and I'm going to love and live without regret” palpitation her anxiety down, it was an arduous pill to swallow.
But she did, for herself and zion, who she yearned to become a promising version of herself for.
