some reddie headcannons no one asked for
so sara and i were talking aaaaaannnddd… these happened. we apologize for nothing.
co-written with the lovely @turtleneckrichie !!!! go follow her right now you fools
hcs about Eddie’s journey with last names <3
Okay but hear me out
Richie and Eddie end up accidentally moving in together
Like Richie gets his own place ASAP bc this boy loves to be independent.
He’s so excited to have his own house but tbh he’s a slob!!!!
Eddie is always over bc “RICHIE U HAVENT DONE DISHES IN A MONTH”
“Eds it’s only been four days”
“YOU USE THAT MANY BOWLS IN FOUR DAYS”
Eventually Eddie just ends up sleeping over? all the time? cause Richie is so bad at adulting?
Eds has a permanent parking spot in the driveway
Yeah Richie isn’t complaining bc that’s his boy
At first they aren’t together
But u can’t just… be pals when ur constantly cleanin house together
Trust me it takes a special kind of love to scrub toilets as a team
Yeah so all the losers kinda just accept that they’re together bc… they’re meant to be
K so like they go on dates but they don’t call them dates per say
“Just 2 bros hangin out at a fancy restaurant (three tables apart cause they’re NOT GAY)”
“Rich stop”
Eventually they accept it and Eds asks Richie out officially
Cause Richie is still in denial like he loves this boy? How did he not know? WOW HIS EYES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL okay seriously how did he not realize
Eddie is beyond happy bc like they have their own place? And they’re boyfriends?
Bc as soon as they start datin Eddie is like boy BYE and ditches his mom’s place!!!
(Richie is hella thankful for him getting away from his mom)
(And Eddie’s general attitude/vibes perk up so much bc he’s not!!! In a toxic environment anymore!!!)
SO NOW IT’S BEEN MONTHS AND THEY’RE SERIOUS
Like, they make plans based on each other’s schedules bc they wanna hang out all! the! time!
“Sorry Stanley I’m hanging out with Eds on that day”
“Richie that day is THREE WEEKS AWAY”
Eddie high key always makes arrangements for things for the two of them
Like this boy is 100% the guy who uses “we” when answering questions
“Eddie, you wanna go to the movies with us?”
“We’d love to Mike!!!”
“I- okay. Yeah. Shoulda known.”
So it’s super late n they’re snuggling in bed, bein all lovey and stuff
And Eddie decides that he’s gonna stop using his last name
“Rich, I think I wanna change my last name.”
“To Tozier, I hope?”
“Why are you like this”
“Yeah but seriously if you wanna do that then go for it babe!!”
(Eddie lowkey already made an email account w/ Tozier as his last name just to try it. He liked it a lot indeed)
Richie is so supportive like Eds is pretty much completely in love w him at this point
Even when Eddie tried to take up scrapbooking.
“Literally no one likes scrapbooking why are you even doing this”
“Richie stop it, let me focus”
“Can I put glitter glue all over your face?”
“Richie no you’re an adult”
He most certainly signs his book (with glitter glue, at Richie’s request) as E.T. bc those are his initials now
And YES Richie makes so many jokes about it
“You know babe, your initials are E.T. now”
“Richie it’s three in the morning go to bed”
“ET PHONE HOME”
“RICHARD go to SLEEP”
Eventually Eddie’s driver’s license expires and it’s time for him to visit the DMV
Yes, he definitely signs his renewed license as Eddie Tozier
“Wait, Eds, have you had your name legally changed yet??”
“No?????”
“Then… isn’t that identity fraud??”
“Hey Tozier, why don’t you shut up and don’t get me arrested. Just say we’re married”
“Okay… Tozier (:< ” *HEART EYES INTENSIFY*
Eddie doesn’t mention it but suddenly everything in his life is Tozier Tozier Tozier!!!
He even orders his magazine subscriptions w/ Richie’s last name
“Babe did you subscribe to… Ryan Gosling Source Weekly??”
“SWEET MY MAGAZINES ARE HERE!”
“You… used my name to get magazines of ur celeb crush…”
“Ya and I used ur credit card so watch out for that on the bill”
Richie is still whipped™
So he’s like “well what would Eds want for our one year anniversary?”
And he gets AN IDEA
He’s like “ok let’s change Eddie Spaghetti’s last name legally” bc he actually wants him to be a Tozier!!
So Rich does all that legal stuff just for his Eds to have his last name be Tozier!
And when their one year is comin up Richie just puts the certificate in a lil box w some cute blue wrapping paper and has Eddie open it
Eds is like on the brink of tears he loves his boy? So much?
Yeah and later on they go on a nice dinner date and surprise surprise!
Richie gets down on one knee and Eds immediately is shook
Cue confused and a lil bit sad Richie
“BAbe i’m literally proposing what ru doin”
Eds WHIPS a little box out of his pocket and shoves it in his face
“I WAS GONNA PROPOSE TO YOU”
Everyone in the restaurant is laughing. So. Hard.
Like the whole freaking wait staff is just like “christ these two, whatta mess”
So they’re a mess and Richie puts the ring away so Eds can propose bc HE WANTS TO SO BAD
“Richie Tozier, we may already have the same last name but like, I can’t get enough of you so please marry me.”
“Yes of course I’m gonna marry you, Eds! I won’t let a bod like yours get away so easily”
“Richie literally I just proposed can you just,, not for like,, one moment please and put on the ring”
Richie demands his Own Proposal bc he wants to say he was the one that proposed
“Just think of it Eds… when my aunt asks us who popped the question we can both say “i did” and not be lying! It’ll be the perfect way to confuse my family!”
“Richie we just.. Got engaged u don’t have to do it a second time”
“EDDIE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LET MEEE”
Richie 100% does the whole friken… stands on a chair clinkin a glass
“I HAVE A DECLARATION TO MAKE”
“We all just saw you guys get engaged….”
“NO U DIDNT NOW STOP INTERRUPTING”
Eddie has never rolled his eyes harder
“Eddie Tozier… will u be my Eddie Tozier…. But like for reals now??”
Eddie is just that “I GUESS” meme
Yeah the whole restaurant claps, again
(Cause Richie demanded that they all clap for them again)
Eddie is blushin hardcore bc his boy is so extra?? How is he so lucky???
Richie makes a Big Show of putting the ring on him
He just somehow… does… like no one understands how bc it’s just a ring??
But like… he is so graceful abt it and its such a Soft gesture
Eddie feels like a fool bc he’s fumblin so much n almost drops his??
But Richie just smiles n says “You got this Tozier” <3