(In response to the writing prompt: No body, no soul, no service. taken from reddit)
Mason scratched his head. There were only two requirements for providing service in this establishment. A body and a soul. So far, they had encountered several "zombie" incidents, as well as "ghost" ones, but nothing like this.
He looked again at the woman waiting patiently, and scratched his head again. Maybe he should talk to the boss. She did, after all, have the White Card, which allowed unrestricted passage and unlimited authority. Of course, he had yet to check if it was fake...
"What seems to be the problem 'ere, buddy?"
"Ah, sir, there's some glowing-eyed woman out front who... doesn't fulfill any of the requirements."
"Really? Well as interesting as that is, you have to escort her out the door! What's wrong?"
"You see, sir, she's here for our rarest item. She has the White Card."
THe boss blinked. "The White Card?"
The boss appeared to think for a while. "Well, this could be a problem. Assuming that it is genuine, she should have unlimited access to anything, anywhere. on the other hand, I'm not sure how she's supposed to handle that with no physical body, or soul."
"Sir, perhaps you'd like to speak with her?"
"Yes, yes, that would be excellent." Then he muttered to himself, 'Glowin' eyes, no body, no soul... It can't be...'
His eyes lit up the moment he saw her. "Vic! Where've 'ya been? I ain't seen 'ya in a couple 'undred cennies! 'Ya gotch'er self onnu've those White Cards, 'ey?"
The woman tilted her head a fraction to the right and smiled. "I'm sory, but you seem to have mistaken me with someone else. I'd just really like to take the Former Supreme Leader's brain and go. This is a very important mission."
The boss chuckled. "Same 's always, eh? Terrible mem'ry 'ya got there. Told'ya 'ya shoulda gotten it checked back in H-987."
The woman's smile did not waver. "Sir, I apologize for being unable to remember who you are. I would like to purchase the brain, if you do not mind. I am strictly aware that the policy of this shop is--"
"Sheesh, Vic, ev'ry time 'ya get yer mind wiped 'ya go back to this sick stuck-up version of 'yaself. When's the last time 'ya've got it r'freshed at Naiviv's? Tsk, tsk, every time. How's you 'body' holdin' up?" And then to Mason, "May, get this girlie here the thing, won'tcha? I got a bit a catchin' up ta do."
Vsisibly surprised, Mason complied and headed to he back. he hadn't heard the boss speak like that for some time. So carefree and casual. It was a side of the boss that was only heard of in stories. He shook his head, and fetched the brain.
Despite the boss seemingly being (former) close friends with this "Vic" woman, Mason couldn't help but think that she was really off. She was strange, and not just because of her eyes. The aura she gave off was different. Almost suffocating.
"Sir, I have the-- Holy Skye! What the fuck did you do?!"
The boss... he was on the floor, his head neatly chopped off. Dark purple blood was splattered everywhere.
"Excuse me, but before you drop that in shock, I'll take it."
Mason looked at the woman, his heart pounding. She held out her hand, still dripping with purple blood. She was still smiling.
"Mason? Mason Cavett? I really apologize for the mess, but I'm in a hurry now, and I need the object you're holding."
Dumbstruck and scared out of his mind, he gingerly handed her the container, hands shaking.
She took it, and with a final smile, walked calmly out the front door.
Mason knelt, horrified next to his boss's corpse. Sure, he hadn't been employed under him for that long, but the boss had been kind to him, although a bit of a tease.
He trembled and stared at the floor. At the sticky purple blood that slowly dirtied the once-clean crystal-tile floor. But Mason didn't cry. He couldn't understand why the tears refused--
"Gah, 'ya could at least shed one tear, kid."
Mason looked up so fast that he almost gave himself whiplash. "What?"
"Help me up, will 'ya? Vic really did a number on me this time."
"I don't get it at all, " Mason said, his mind still reeling.
The boss scratched his head. "Well, to sum it up, no, I am not immortal, yes, in a sense, Vic does have a body. No, she did not decapitate me in intention of killing me, she meant it as a prank because I assumed she forgot everything again. Yes, the brain is chocolate. Yes, Vic has several friends amongst the highest tier officials, and yes, she snagged a White Card from an official she despised, instead of requesting for one."
The boss looked at Mason. He was pale as he tried to absorb all this information. "Skye, she's scary," he said, running his hand through his hair.
The boss nodded. "Indeed she is. Never get on her real bad side. I hear she'll do worse that just kill you."
Mason blanched even more. "Wh-wh-what?! Is she coming back?!"
The boss shrugged. "Who knows? Probably not. But you heard quite a bit from me, so don't be surprised if she flips you on the street, or something."
"What?! What am I supposed to do then?!"
The boss shrugged and gave a sly smirk. "No idea. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm taking a month long break to reattach my head. Hold the fort."
