Profiling & Harassing My Son
On Monday, my son and I underwent a very challenging and infuriating incident in which my son was harassed, accused and profiled by the so-called manager of an aquatics center in the District of Columbia. She claimed that my son looked like a teenager that broke into a locker and later on claimed that he came in with “boat cutters”. Ironically it was the first time my (naive) son ever heard of this tool.
My son had complained about this particular woman just a few days prior when he went to use the facility. He was rather upset about what he described as her stalking him, following him around when he went to use the bathroom. She opened the bathroom door to peek on him while he was there.
When my son returned a few days later to swim, he changed his mind and used the bathroom. While going into the bathroom, he saw the woman again. According to my child, they made long eye contact as he went into the family bath room and she came out from it saying to him, “it’s the family bathroom”.
Minutes later, as I waited in the car, a police officer pulled up. Shortly thereafter, I got a call from my son saying the police were knocking on the bathroom door.
I was so upset, so shocked over such a really stupid, and ignorantly handled ordeal. When I began to question the so-called manager (whom I have never seen before) she tells me one of the workers who was absent that day said my son looks like the teenage thief. What?????!!!???
What does the thief look like, I asked. She could not give me an answer. The officers were very nice to my son and I after my initial shock and emotional response. And a long conversation over this matter. And when, this ugly woman tried to shake my hand to apologize.
The saddest thing about all this is that….my son started the Life Guard Training there and we frequented the aquatics throughout the year. We never saw this woman. Never!!! Because she would have known us by now. You just can’t miss this strong mother-son team. The male manager, whom I had met last year due to the indifferent and discourteous attitude of the staff up front, was no where to be found and this woman denied even knowing him.
Here’s whats even more disturbing. Every single person must present an ID and sign in before entering the building. My son did so, of course. So my question is why didn’t she confront my son directly, ask his name and chat with him rather than sneaking behind him, spying on him, harassing him and calling the police?
And this is a black woman who claims to be the manager of the aquatics center. This is troubling! Very very troubling. A destructive trend of demonizing each other.
What I saw through her were lies and deception. She appeared to be lying, and sadly she looks no where near trust worthy.
It has taken me two days of darkness and trauma, of being with the emotions this has all triggered. Very disturbing. Very hurtful. As a mother, I am my son’s protector. No one is perfect, but accusing my son of breaking in someone’s locker without proof and calling “Johnny law” on him is unacceptable. Totally unacceptable.
I share this as I get prepare to file a complaint against this establishment. We are very vulnerable at this time and I am quite aware of this. I am also aware of the lessons and am integrating this experience. I know deep down that it is pushing me to come out and take a stand. My tongue has been paralyzed after long hauls of trauma, but the paralysis is wearing off and it’s starting to warm up.
As we left the center and after the officers got to know my son and I a little better, one said….“You are a great mother! I wish that there were more mothers like you!” He hugged me and they went on his way.
I recorded the entire incident!! My world has taken a whole new turn.
Saturn (police officers) square Neptune (lying woman @ pool)
What would you do if your child was profiled and harassed?