[ cup & kiss ] – for the sender’s muse to cup the receiver muses’ face during an incredibly passionate and long overdue kiss. - autometallums for you know exactly who 💜💜💜
answering: @proserphinas
long overdue
when his skin was metal, there came a time that alphonse felt quite mathematical about the passing of a day. the day started at 00:00; it ended at 00:00. the day consisted of twenty-four hours, & he was awake for every second. by necessity, alphonse clung to the memory that he was human — he was a living soul. consequently, he couldn’t waste or will the time away by wishing that the day would pass a little faster. that kind of wish wasn’t worth it when life was considered.
even so, the time passed fast enough. for years, edward installed in alphonse a feeling of such immediacy that alphonse wins his humanbody again without wishing too hard that time would just happen.
he wears a humanbody again. it feels natural & right &
alphonse feels a bit like a mummy. or a skeleton. or something.
again, it will take years for alphonse to grow into his body. his soul & his body are intertwined, of course, but they speak different languages. it feels as though there are lagging moments of dissociation that shake alphonse out of the present & into the future —- then, there are lagging moments where his body / his senses decide everything is new again & everything strikes him with meteor speed.
it’s amazing & welcome & overwhelming & welcome.
still — lagging moments mean lagging awareness. it’s true that alphonse feels both validated & vindicated to be a person again — it feels a little as though he can laugh at truth & say ‘ ha ! my memories were true ! ‘ but at the same time
so he travels. he goes to xing. when he’s crossing the desert, he’s curious. alphonse toes off his shoes & his socks; he presses his feet into the sand & startles when he realizes that it’s hot.
he startles more & laughs when he realizes at night that he’s cold.
alphonse travels to claim curiosity for himself, to challenge himself to wrestle down the prospect of too much new sensory information. he travels because he can, & because ( for better or worse ) it’s difficult to imagine himself as stationary.
when alphonse travels, he starts to learn three languages — some of them branches of a larger linguistic family. he writes letters & learns that he’s
it’s wonderful to travel, & ( on principle ) things feel too uncertain for him to leave home for long.
. . . alphonse makes the trip back & forth several times.
each time, he appears a few centimeters taller. his shoulders appear a little broader, & he’s deciding that sunshine feels much grander / much more devilish than he’s ever remembered.
mar bears with him as alphonse remembers to be a person & grows into himself. he expands into : the borders of his fingertips, the undeserved / sudden ache at his shoulder, his meticulously trimmed hair ( he hates for it to grow too long. he doesn’t like the reminder of the neglect his body had faced ).
mar bears with him & thrives in the meantime.
alphonse is twenty-six now, & he’s growing into impulse as though it’s a natural comfort.
mar bears with him & grows success whenever he chances to talk to her, when he makes the journey back home & tells her that the air smells different than it does two towns over, two cities over, two distances away. it’s exciting, & he feels a little out of place — but it’s comfortable.
she chastises him for a sunburn that lashes the back of his hands scarlet, & he sheepishly rubs the back of his neck &
there are fireworks — or some variation of fireworks. celebratory pops in the sky & shouts & the smell of metal & juniper. alphonse can’t quite place why he smells juniper, but it’s there & it makes him feel fresh &
mar is still scrutinizing the burn on his hand, & he tilts his head just a little to the right to surge forward & taste a sweet touch. when he kisses her, alphonse kisses warmth.
alphonse is twenty-six now. mar’s hand is at his jaw, &
the night isn’t desert cold. alphonse is going to keep traveling, but there’s something nice about the smell of metal & juniper. he’s building a memory, & he prays that she is too.
. . . he believes that she’s building a memory too.
their knees knock, & they separate.
she is warm, she is warmth.
