#psalmthirtysevenfour

[abidinginhislove]

[squarepeglife]

T-Minus

13.5 hours until I get to see Chelsea.

So hype.

[squarepeglife]

Tumblr after dark. Featuring James and the men of tumblr. Love it.

and one follower has been lost goodbye you will not be missed

[squarepeglife]

I ship you with me because of reasons. duh

16 or 17 days i cant do math

but soon

[squarepeglife]

Chelsea and James do Hoodrat Thangs

t-minus 17 days.

Look out planet Earth.

[squarepeglife]

okay so i guess i have to do the thing

Rule 1: Post the rules.

Rule 2: Answer the questions you were tagged on and make 11 new ones.

Rule 3: Tag 11 new people and link them to your post.

1. What’s the most important thing you’ve learned in the past year? 

People make bad gods.

2. What would you say is your biggest accomplishment? 

Ever? Umm...still loving people. I think.

3. What is one belief you have that you would have never imagined having a year or two ago? 

My love for heavy tattoos. idk ha.

4. What’s one thing you really want to do before you die?

Start a family.

5. When was the last time that you really opened up to someone? Do you regret it? 

I want to regret it, but I suppose not.

6. What’s is your favorite store to shop at? Favorite restaurant? 

H&M for clothes and Buffalo Wild Wings for food.

7. Would you rather go hiking, or go to the beach?

yes

8. What is the most terrifying thing that’s ever happened to you?

I've had a few near-death experiences driving, and have nearly suffocated and drown(ed?) one time each.

9. What were/are you like in high school?

All-American Golden Boy Athlete Child

10. What about college?

Loud and wild and underestimated

11. On a scale of 1-10, how important are potatoes to you?

8.018

1. What artist/band would you love to see perform? Muse.

2. Where do you hope you are in 5 years? Home.

3. How long can you be alone and still feel comfortable? A good while.

4. Who is someone you miss? Lesley! and Jherrel. And Courtney. 

5. What’s your dream pet? Some medium-sized dog.

6. What does your favorite color remind you of? Passion.

7. What your favorite show? The Walking Dead right now - Lost of all time.

8. Where do you want to travel the most? Earth

9. If you could have a superpower what would it be? Unconditional Love

10. Whats one thing you want to learn how to do? Write music

11. How important is sweet tea on a scale of 1-10? 7.02

If you don’t feel comfortable answering any, or all of these questions, feel free to skip them. 

I don't really know if I did this right um but do it if you want ig idk

[squarepeglife]

Thankful Look in the Rearview Mirror

I don't really know what to say as far as the quality or the growth of 2013. I feel a bit blind to my own life in a lot of regards.

But one thing I'm not blind to, at least not as blind to, is the people and moments and things that I was really blessed with and that tangibly added to my joy and my faith throughout the last year. This list is incomplete and not exhaustive, so please do not take offense or read too much into it.

I am thankful for Haley. I don't know why she continues to stay around as my friend because I sure wouldn't with the way I've abused it. For a year now, she's listened to me whine and complain and theorize and overthink and generally disagree with every single thing she tells me (hint: i'm just trying to get you to convince me past my own fears). Still, she stuck around. She asks me for advice or my thoughts on things like advice anons or the male perspective, she compliments my talents and skills, she points me back to the cross and her heart breaks for my broken heart. What a rare find.

I'm thankful for Lesley and Cody (and Matt). I was fortunate enough to spend a week with these kids in Ohio, and I wish I would have devoted myself more to time with both of them because they stuck around and still considered me worth knowing and loving when nobody else did. Then I got to see Lesley again, and meet Matt for the first time (cuddling included) on a spontaneous road trip. I'm glad they're still my friends even after my Huskers handed them their first home loss since 2010 :) I hope I can hold onto these three forever.

I'm thankful  for online friendships becoming real. By my count last night, in 2013 I have met 33 people in real life that I started relationships with through tumblr. Some of those relationships have ended and been fractured, but the ones that matter still exist and to be able to embrace brothers and sisters that you love is the way the world was originally created. I loved getting Cold Stone with Rod, dancing and eating with Breanna (thanks for holding my water and taking that awesome picture of me! <3), eating B-Dubs with Matt and Lesley, playing guitar with Cody, watching Ramses take pictures of himself and having him pray over me, taking selfies at the bean in Chicago with Ann Marie, Jadi testing my hat size whilst incomplete on my head at Starbucks, popping deuces and duckfaces with Falyn, and every other moment with all the rest of you. I hope I get to meet even more of you moving forward.

I'm thankful for selfless hearts. I've never received as much personal mail as I did this year. I've never been so tangibly blessed on a birthday than I was this year (thanks for the shoes Jonnie they are seriously so awesome). When I was hurting financially, you guys sent me some money. When my backpack got stolen, you guys replaced the books I never got to read (thank you Moriah and Nicole). Even small things like Matt buying me breakfast at U of M, even non-tangible things like Ann Marie opening her house to me and Ella and Courtney calling me on a 15 hour road trip to keep me company, and big things like Lesley paying for my ticket to the game, I have been humbled and inspired to love better by receiving love from you all. Shoutout to Falyn for being the first though, with her bomb ass care package complete with snickerdoodles, gushers, mix cd's and spider-man duct tape.

I'm thankful for redeemed relationships with brothers. For some reason I just have a tough time with relationships with other men. Even on here, I am so quick to judgment towards guys I don't know and I'm not entirely sure why, but God works through and around that. I started off thinking this "blakebaggott" character was annoying and self-righteous and generally insufferable. Turns out he's an intelligent and articulate thinker with a heart that doesn't grow weary and bears good fruit, and now I think we can both say that the other is one of the most cherished relationships we each have through this dumb site. Same thing with "musiqchild007" - he was profane and disrespectful to people and I tried following him once but the beyonce spam was too much for me. Somewhere along the line Jesus decided that wasn't going to fly. Truthfully I don't even remember how/when Jherrel and I started talking and diving into friendship with each other, but God's taken that rocky start and turned it into the strongest bond I have with any man in person or online. And I got to spend a day with him in the flesh. These are just the biggest two examples. The laughs of my relationship with Rod, being able to related to in my relationship with Christopher, the occasional friction but the mutual love in my relationship with Micah, the respect I get in my relationship with shmapey, the everything in my relationship with Jake, the iron sharpening iron in my relationship with Nick, the joy and laughter of my relationship with Marc, and so many more of you that I have been blessed by. You're not overlooked or forgotten.

I'm thankful for being pursued. I'm mainly looking at you, Asian Dan the Man, and you, Darren, and you, shmapey. You guys see something in me that I do not see in myself over 2013 and even though I have virtually nothing to offer you right now, you continue to come to me, encourage me, and pour yourselves out. Whether it's money, a phone case, cookies (not the best ever), cards, phone calls and prayer, or whatever else, you and others have cushioned my hurt and my loneliness more than I can explain. Eric, Jonathan, Samuel and Brian, this applies to you guys too. Thank you for thinking I'm worth your time and not giving up.

I'm thankful for lovely sisters. How many amazing women are on this site? Chelsea has continuously listened to me and shared her life with me despite being warned not to, Lesley has maintained our friendship despite so many justifiable reasons she wouldn't have to, Courtney got children in Uganda to wish me happy birthday, Ella allows me to speak into her life not knowing she speaks into mine even more, Tiffany is so complimentary and edifying with her words, Catherine called me a "10" and keeps me in check with every element of her sass and spunk, Falyn is a real-life snapchat, Emma has the deepest depths of passion and praise in her bones, Olivia sometimes likes my selfies and is just a solid rock of consistency that rubs off on you, Maerin and Victoria allow me to play 'big brother' and appreciate me and are thankful in it, Becca is the most adorably affectionate woman I've ever experienced, Katie is a handful but of the absolute best stuff you could hope for in a woman, Brittany is such a fighter and refuses to be beaten or stricken, Lauren is straight out of a pinterest board and the most elegant and artistically gifted woman I know, Lauren is wise beyond her years but still grounded and looks at me from eye level and Holly and I are separated twins of different ethnicities we have so much in common. I know I left so many of you genuinely incredibly wonderful women (and more importantly sisters) off of here, but don't think I don't recognize or see you. I do.

I'm thankful for words. You guys are so lavishing with words. The inquiring anons, the uplifting fan mails, the prayers when I and my friends/family need them most, the flooded inbox that I forget to respond to when I post all of my hurt publicly. Words are my first love language and it's safe to say that I feel loved here.

I'm thankful for the negatives. I'm not just thankful for the positive stuff. I'm thankful for the people that didn't think I was worth fighting for. I'm thankful for the fractured relationships of people leaving. I'm thankful for the hateful words spoken over me. I'm thankful for the sabotaged plans and undermined intentions. I love you all still, more than you love me if you even do, and I have learned from you. I'm still learning, and sometimes the things that have happened still hurt me, but I deserve better than you people and those situations, and so do you. 

I'm thankful for redemption and grace. I'm not a finished product. I'm not anything pretty right now. If you knew all the skeletons I'm hiding even at 10:52am on December 31st, you'd shudder. But you're still here. You're still pouring. You're still gifting. You're still speaking. You're still forgiving. You're still encouraging and uplifting and inspiring and not giving up on me. You're all golden.

Thank you.

[squarepeglife]

Ski Trip Tumblr Meetup Extravaganza

yo hoodrat kids.

so a while back i put out a feeler asking who lived in the western half of the country. here's why:

Chelsea and I were talking and arrived at the totally bomb awesome conclusion that it would be awesome to have a tumblr ski trip meetup in Colorado. The best part? You're invited.

Want more details? Too bad, they don't exist yet. The only thing to really hang our hat on for sure is that it will be in the spring around spring break time. I know I've talked to a few other people that seemed reallly into the idea like Chelsea and Moriah but this is still in fledgling form. So basically take two things away from this post.

Imagine the neatness! We can get a cabin or a condo or something, ski or attempt to ski during the day, make hot drinks and hide under thick blankets and get warm by a fireplace maybe and talk about Jesus and sing to Jesus with guitars and get to know each other and Jesus.

If you're interested let me know or let Chelsea know. And don't think "Oh that would be cool but I wouldn't know anyone/nobody knows me so I'm not going to come." Nobody knows everyone. That's the whole point. Also don't necessarily rule yourself out because you live far away. I asked about the western half of the country just because that's obviously closer, but literally anyone from anywhere can come and you would love it and we would love you.

So yeah. If you responded to that original message I'll ask you about it individually but feel free to be in contact because we'd both like for this to work out and be amazing.