#qb-e1

[dartier]

James Bond is a Dad now and he has Dad Jokes?

James: What did the campers say about the campfire? They gave it GLOWING reviews.

James: Why is it never relaxing when two couples go camping?

Alec: Murder?

James: Two tents

James: What type of footwear do frogs wear camping during the summer? Open toad shoes.

007Fest 2022 Scavenger hunt #15 (headcanon)

[teamqbranch]

Intro Post

Minion ID: QB-E1 Division: Writer, Artist, and will generally dabble in anything I can. Personal goal for fest: 1 post per day, and at least a long one-shot. Time zone: GMT-5

Hi, everyone. I’m Emma, and you can find me @azure7539arts. This is my first time joining the 007 fest as I entered the fandom late, but I’ve heard how fun the festivity is, and I’m really looking forward to it, especially looking forward to interacting with you all <3

[dartier]

QB-E1's 007 Fest 2022 Masterlist

QB-E1 Project Proposal <~> Stealthflora {Headcanon} +5

https://dartier.tumblr.com/post/688621558793633792/qb-e1-project-proposal-stealthflora-headcanon

Q Branch celebrates Pi Approximation Day! —Felix Leiter’s Bourbon Chocolate Pecan Pie (Recipe) +5

https://dartier.tumblr.com/post/690515497274507264/q-branch-celebrates-pi-approximation-day

Headcanon — If you can't beat ‘em, bribe ‘em +5

https://dartier.tumblr.com/post/690592631015768064/headcanon-if-you-cant-beat-em-bribe-em

James Bond is a Dad now and he has Dad Jokes?

007Fest 2022 Scavenger hunt #15 (headcanon) +5 +5

https://dartier.tumblr.com/post/691344789911846912/james-bond-is-a-dad-now-and-he-has-dad-jokes

"The Overlord"

Scavenger Hunt #22, a pastiche of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven" +20 +5

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25479742/chapters/101686521

2 events + 2 points

Total: 52 points

[dartier]

Name: @Dart, (@Dartier on Tumblr)

Minion ID: QB-E1

Personal Goals for Fest: Find my way back. Post the damn thing.

Where the hell have I been: I’ve been stuck in Medical, but I’M BAAAAACK

Division: You will never get a straight answer to that. Just know that E is for Extra. I make the connections that don’t make any sort of conventional sense.

The little spontaneous competitions and festivities might seem odd, but problems always seem a little easier to solve afterward.

Don’t think too hard about how we got here, just enjoy the results.

How to Summon Me: When someone says, “We need an extra set of eyes on this,” I usually appear. Also, Cheese, chocolate or gin is mandatory, the unscented candles are optional.

[dartier]

There once was a Bond on a mission

Whose enemies’ heads needed squishin’

I’ve tried all the rest

Defenestration is best

As for my tech/gear, Q can just keep wishin’.

[dartier]

Felix Leiter’s “If I don’t eat some whole grains, my wife is going to beat my ass and not even James Bond will be able to save me” Hot Dog Buns

1 cup Milk, whole fat, we die like there's no time for skim milk

½ cup Water

¼ cup salted Butter

3 cups all-purpose unbleached flour

1 cup white whole wheat flour

 ½ cup ground flax seed

1 (.25 ounce) package instant yeast

2 tablespoons granulated sugar

1 ½ teaspoons Salt, table

1 egg

Dump the ingredients (except for the yeast!) into your bread machine pan in the order your owner's manual specifies. Then put the yeast on top, but not near the salt. Set it on the dough cycle. Press start.

When the dough cycle finishes, divide the dough into 12 equal pieces. Then use the palm of your hand to roll them around in a tight circle until they are nice balls of dough. Then place them on parchment-lined cookie sheets. Flatten slightly. Cover with a tea towel and let rise for at least 30-35 minutes, but you know how it is, sometimes the weather is against you. Bake at 400F (200C) for about 13 minutes or until golden brown.

Headcanon: Felix has been trying to work more whole grains into his diet because otherwise his wife is going to beat his ass and not even James Bond will be able to save him. He dials back the salt in most baked goods. But this recipe calls for the normal amount. Working yeast dough with your hands is good, but Felix likes that his bread machine gives him a set time. Sometimes you gotta slip out the back and kill some guy, but you’d hate for your bread dough to get all ruined. When the job’s going to take longer than an hour and fifty minutes, he likes to use the delay feature. It is handy like that.