this is partially a repost of a tiktok series i did like two years ago, partially inspired that the high republic fanzine is out and references this!, and partially me expanding on thoughts as a former barista.
anyways, THR phase I characters and their coffee orders. i'll probably forget someone and add them later. my expertise: i was a barista for three years.
no I'm not calling it caf this is all half a joke anyways
Avar Kriss: Typically she just gets a coffee with cream. She can drink coffee black, but it's not her preference. Her actual favorite drink is a vanilla white mocha, but she rarely orders this for herself because she's a busy gal ! (Stellan, Elzar, Maru, and the Ataraxia crew have all clocked this.)
Stellan: he's the tea guy of the firebrands. Loves an english breakfast tea with milk in the morning. Loves a basic green tea in the afternoon. He has a chamomile tea usually as part of his evening meditation. However, after he joins the Council, he begins drinking more and more black and green tea and discards his evening tea routine as he gets more and more overworked.
Elzar: disaster man gets a large iced americano (six shots at the shop I worked at), adds two shots, chugs it immediately. This stresses everyone out.
Reath and Cohmac: they ask so many questions. where did you source your matcha from? Who is their milk supplier? Are the syrups made in house? Do they dry their own petals? They're not trying to be jerks, they're genuinely and actually curious, but the baristas are underpaid and never know answers, Cohmac and Reath realize, they order two small hot matchas and tip 100%.
Orla: medium iced coffee with vanilla syrup, but she never has once paid for her drink because her vibes are so elite. The other regular customers lover her, the baristas love her, she's just a goddamn delight.
Sskeer: hot tea or iced tea, depends on the weather. honey with hot tea; simple syrup with iced tea, just enough to cut some of the herbal notes.
Keeve: double undercut icon Keeve Trennis is the token bisexual iced oat milk latte with lavender, argue with the wall.
Jora: classic hot mom drink, hot coffee with 2 cream and 2 sugars.
Affie: all of the Vessel crew is so used to, like, Star Wars-Folgers-Instant Coffee, so when they get to go to a coffee shop, they Splurge for their Little Treats. Affie loves a caramel frozen coffee with extra whipped cream and drizzle.
Leox: blended matcha ! Like Orla, he's never once paid for a drink. Vibes are too good. He thinks he's paid, but Geode pockets the cash.
Geode: gets the most obscene drink imaginable that the baristas detest making but is such a lovely customer that the staff can't hold it against him.
Maru: if he stoops so low as to buy a tea and not make it himself, he gets a large hot black tea, double bagged. steeps it obscenely long so it's basically a concentrate, everyone is mystified.
Lina Soh: hasn't made her own coffee in years, but her staff orders her almond milk cafe au laits with honey.
Sylvestri: iced caramel macchiato and she likes it layered, okay !!!
Jordanna: iced white mocha. ssssh. she's kinda guilty about it but isn't really sure why.
Buckets: hot chai latte with oat milk and pistachio syrup. (legit try it sometime, if your shop has this, it's so fucking good.)
Lula: iced coffee with oatmilk and she changes the flavor based on the season/mood she's in. this is absolutely an order she's copied from kantam.
Kantam: see above.
Zeen: hot vanilla latte with oatmilk, asks for it extra frothy.
Ram: mocha blended coffee with extra caramel and chocolate drizzle. literally of course.
Farzala: has never once ordered the same thing twice. who knows.
Qort: Just goes "whatever you want!" every time. His actual favorite is a hot chocolate but wants to be easy and simple!
Samira: The classic hot bitch drink: hot latte with skim milk and a raw sugar. Typically people who order this drink are awful, but she used to work in food service before coming up in the political staff scene, so she's perfectly polite and cheerful.
Avon: tries to impress upon people that she's an adult and important and gets a coffee with milk. Secretly hates it. Vern typically gets her an iced black tea with lemon and simple syrup like "oh they gave it to me!" Avon lets it slide because it's Vern.
Vern: her coffee shop habits were impressed upon her by Stellan and doesn't drink any coffee, mostly tea. Her favorite is Lady Grey, and if it's a time to indulge, adds cream and lavender syrup.
Imri: that's a hot choccy boy.
Crash: has never once ordered in a coffee shop. That's a Red Bull girlie.
Xylan: has a bullshit order. large iced coffee, fill the cup with ice fully, 2/3 full of coffee, add exactly 3.5 pumps of simple syrup, then equal splashes of oat milk and almond milk. Stir 7 times clockwise, then four times counter clockwise. somehow the staff don't revolt because he's a guilty pleasure fav customer and not a single barista can describe why they like him. one barista is convinced that xylan doesn't have a single fucking clue what he's talking about and just makes it standard. xylan can tell the difference but he can't point to where so he swallows it because he admires the bravery of the barista to flummox him.
