Hi! I have a question about Islam that ive been having a hard time getting answers to since scholars of the faith are often against queer people and the Qur'an doesnt have something for this specific scenario. how do, feminine gay men stay modest? Is it the same as straight men? What about gay women? do the rules change when heterosexuality arent in play? or like nonbinary people? Where would someone who is nonbinary pray in a mosque? Ive been considering converting to Islam, but as a queer man whose quite feminine, i have questions about how someone like me would follow the rules. Any answers, or advice would be greatly appreciated even its just how you (another queer Muslim) act within the rules :)
Hello and Assalamu alaikum!
So a lot of it is deeply personal, with your own gender identity. i am agender, but i am more femme aligned so i choose to wear hijab. queer identities are complex, so there is no one ruling that will work for all of us.
when talking about femme gay men, they would follow the guidelines for men. if part of their gender identity is more femme aligned, then i would recommend they do what feels more comfortable for them. as a lesbian myself, i follow the same guidelines as straight women, but some may choose to follow different rulings based on their gender identity and relationship with Allah سُبْحَانَهُۥ وَتَعَالَىٰ.
verse 24:31 talks about one of the altered rules for gay men specifically, but most rules are the same.
for non-binary people, like what i said before, a lot of this is deeply personal. it depends on your relationship with gender and Allah سُبْحَانَهُۥ وَتَعَالَىٰ. i feel more aligned with femininity, so i choose to wear hijab, and follow women's rulings. some may choose to follow a mix, and some may choose to follow men's rulings. non-binary people are also mentioned in Hadith!
i see that you've already followed some of the big queer muslim accounts on here, but here are some extra resources for more info :)
Hope this helps!
💬 10 🔁 6116 ❤️ 7431 · Masterlist of literature about/including LGBTQ+ Muslims · (To be updated continuously. Please let me know if there’s
Why Islam is NOT a transphobic religion: https://docs.google.com/document/d/16utsjOY8QYYxe4TKhAUlOnS389KUwHTilxz_DcaZkHA/edit
LGBT Qur'an https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mSHeflFdUEtwf9q35Emn4q4ZNmE5CgxWSvtk5VMMutY/edit
https://www.advocatesforyouth.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Im-Muslim-I-Might-Not-Be-Straight.pdf