ahh sorry sorry! can i get angst #8 with suga and she/her pronouns?
After a while you went quiet and I got mean
Always pushing you away from me
But you come back with gravity
And when I call you come home
I know the end- phobe bridgers
Graduate school was always a dream of yours. Something you wanted ever since you told your obaa-chan that you were going to college and you saw the way her eyes lit up. You wanted to see it again. You wanted to make her and your whole family proud. You didn’t expect the courseload and teaching a class to be easy, but you sure as hell didn’t think it would take such a big of a toll on your personal relationships.
You came home to Suga every night but between grading papers and struggling to keep up on readings, you hadn’t been able to spend any meaningful time together. Hell, it’s probably been three months since we went on a date. He’s understanding. He’s been here and knows the stress of juggling everything but god is he such a better person than you are. He was always kind and apologetic about canceling plans or being absent. You both know the venom lacing your words isn’t truly directed at him but that doesn’t make the dismissive and angry words hurt any less.
He understands. That’s why he didn’t say anything. Just quietly supporting you from the sidelines to get through the semester while you did everything save physically pushing him away. He will give you the space you want. Moving to the living room to work so you can use the whole table and not get distracted by the soft beats he taps into the table while he reads. He won’t ask you to cook dinner nor expect you to thank him when he does. He accepts that because without his reminder you might not even remember to eat at all.
You know you aren’t being fair but you can’t ever find the time to truly apologize. It’s not something you can do in a ten-minute period and you always say you’ll do it on the weekend but here you are still grading papers while he is watching your favorite show in the living room. He would wait but he knows you aren’t planning on actually joining him no matter what you say. But if you asked, he would wait all night.