I think as a fandom we do not give Nicholas Cox enough financial literacy. He is poor, yes. He is unused to luxury, yes. But when you’re so focused on the cost of things and having to budget, you develop: financial literacy. Nicholas knows taxes. Nicholas has worked jobs. Nicholas has formulas for budgeting. Nicholas pays rent on time. Nicholas knows how much milk costs at any moment. Nicholas knows the difference between good bread and bad bread. Nicholas knows how to fix pipes with a wrench, some scrap metal, some screws, and a rusty screwdriver he found on the side of the road. It was the only way he could help keep his mother afloat. He would be financially literate.
Nicholas deciding he wants a streak of red in the middle of his bangs. Him complaining in the bathroom and staining things red until Seiji finally comes to help. Nick sitting quietly while Seiji carefully paints his hair red. Seiji having to sit on Nick’s lap to get the underside. Nick asking if Seiji is wearing nice clothes. Seiji responding that he’s wearing shitty clothes bc he’s literally dying Nicholas’ hair and that gets messy. Nick smirking and swiping Seiji’s shirt with the dye. Them beginning to flick the red dye at each other, until everything gets so stained Nick has to take off his tank top and they have to immediately clean. Nick picking up toothpaste and baking soda, claiming it’s the easiest way to get it out, and he’s worked a lot of part time jobs so he’d know. Them cleaning together, and fighting and laughing and teasing the whole time. Seiji forgetting to close the curtain fully before going to bed. Nicholas and Seiji falling asleep, facing each other, eye contact slowly fading as their eyes close
uhm so like it’s called letters to myself and it’s Seiji having a bad time and a lot of self hatred and OCD and being unable to move on and yeah and ok thanks!!!!
“Jesse,
My therapist is having me do this. I’m in her office currently. I won’t be showing her this. I’m not even talking to Jesse, just myself. Gina says it’s to “get my feelings out”…
-Seiji”
wow wow enticing isn’t it you should like totally go read wahaaaaaaat anyways POEM BOMB 💥💥💥💥 and yes this is in the fic shhhhhh go read ittttt…
hate
i didnt think i was capable of hating until i walked out of your life
the pieces fell into place
the panic, the worrying, the eggshells
your illusion of a safety net that im too familiar with
the safety net i occupy with those that arent you
you
you with your first degree burn
you in a word
you laying facing away
in a deserted rocky plain
if you are the sun
i am the dark side of the moon
the new moon
the other solar system
the asteroids that burn in your atmosphere
how romantic for a bitch
how romantic for a prude
how romantic for a whore
addicted to hate and harm and porn
shoving bugs into your mouth
gnash teeth to chew
hate
how much have i begun to hate since i walked out of your life?
you, only you
when i see reminders of you im scared
scared youll be back
someone mentioned a game you showed me
the color light blue and dogs
i still have your address memorized
i wish i could send live bees just to confuse you
but the silent treatment works and the silent treatment is what you preferred
but was it all my fault for being a child and depressed and unwell
