I've always had a dog but now I'm tasked with looking after a cat, if you're like me and think it'd be a breeze because cats are supposedly low-maintenance compared to dogs you're WRONG, here's what I learned about this demon beast in the first week of living alone together
It's true that he doesn't need to be taken on walks which saves a lot of time, but he will immediately piss and shit into a freshly cleaned litter like it's an invitation, doesn't matter if he just shat five minutes ago, he'll do it again on purpose with malicious intent
He will scream. Sometimes it's about something in particular that upset him but most of the time he will just scream for the fun of it
1am is the perfect time to run head-first into the kitchen door and get scared
One time he woke up when I was in the bathroom and he couldn't find me so he started crying loudly and I had to let him in and he just sat in the bathroom with me. I still don't know what the fuck was up with that
He will ask me to pet him. And then he will bite me
He does NOT want belly rubs, you can NOT play him like a bongo, you should NOT roll him up towel style it's FORBIDDEN
He stares at me all the fucking time but god forbid I look at him
Sometimes he screams for food while his bowl is full, so I just go to the bowl and just shake it a bit so the cat food makes the food sound and then he wants to eat it again. Genius strats
Playing with him is WEIRD. He'll pounce and miss and just walk away like he doesn't care, then hide behind the door like I can't see his silly ass, babyboy just learn to aim already
Sometimes he doesn't miss and actually catches the toy abd then what am I supposed to do??? Cats don't play pull like dogs, do I let him keep it? Do I take it and start over the game so he can pretend-hunt it again? What?
Sometimes he runs after the toy for like 20 seconds and then just abruptly walks away. Babyboy do you think I'm the one this game is for or
He will lay on my lap and purr and rub his head against me and purr and snooze and purr and BITE ME
He can't get out of the drawers
He can get onto elevated surfaces. It fucks me up cause with my dog I just put something on the table and he can't have it. But with this beast? There are hiding places, man
He will steal shit from me. Tiny things, hair rubbons, pen caps, erasers, etc. No idea where it goes. The shadow realm. Turns up a few days later so I know he isn't eating it, he actually isn't really inclined to eat anything but the most refined of foods which is very reassuring. My dog will try to eat a coin like it's candy
He will stare at the wall
He will scream at the wall
There's more, might add later, cheers
