She hasn’t robbed from her own mother, ditched the only life she’s ever known and moved across state lines all for a BOY. She’s seen the kind of desperation that may justify such actions and there have been moments or weakness where running back into Remik’s arms seemed like the only answer to the bone aching loneliness pressing her down into the soil underfoot. However, each and every time she’s gotten by on her own -- an impressive feat and solidifying example of her resilience and true independence. No, she’s moved from Las Vegas to Bone Hill for one thing -- closure. Minette’s never gone through the 12 step process of rehabilitation nor has she ever felt that her lowest lows required professional help (though an objective third party may disagree). Despite her defiance, though, she knows that the only way to tame the insatiable itch beneath her skin, waiting for her next hit, is going to be to confront its root cause, face to face.
Ever since the day she woke up in a hospital room, alone, to the news that her boyfriend had ditched town, it had felt like some part of her was constantly unraveling. Loose ends were never tied and what ifs permeated the air she breathed, particularly when it was being passed to her from a new lover’s lips. Some softly infuriating remnant of him remained lodged in her subconscious, never shaken lose; not even when her brain was flooded with unnatural adrenaline and vivid, dancing spots of color and light took up every other corner of her mind. Still, he existed as an unruly, uninvited tenant. Of course, there had been his letters. On top of the surplus of texts and emails she had amassed from Remik, he’d sent her letters so that she’d have his address no matter where he dashed off to -- just in case. In case of what she was never made explicitly clear but forgiveness seems to be the obvious choice.
As she rounds the corner with an envelope held tightly in a slightly sweaty palm, it’s not forgiveness driving her to his doorstep. It’s not closure either. The motivation behind each heavy footfall is the slowly amounting rage she’s harbored all these years. It goes beyond anger at his departure without a goodbye. It goes beyond frustration that he didn’t fight for her, at how easily he gave up. It goes beyond resentment for the duration of their relationship when it was all RemikRemikRemik and not a single thought spared for her. He’s had part in making her who she is today -- the hard edged catalyst who’s one wrong look away from unleashing a storm and whose shaking hands await the calm of her next hit. Remik made her and ruined her and she’s finally rebuilt herself enough to face him again. She only hopes that he answers as she knocks (pounds might be a more appropriate choice) on the door, wanting to spare an innocent from the fury brewing behind her steely gaze.
Minette need only say two words as she hears footsteps approach. “It’s me.” // @rcmik